‘I work with Demetrios in the boathouse,’ he told her as they pulled away from the jetty in his speedboat.
‘He works in a boathouse? I thought his company had offices in Athens and New York.’
The man shrugged. ‘These last few years he has been spending less and less time there. You will have to ask him.’ He looked at her curiously as he steered the boat through the waves. ‘How do you know Demetrios?’
‘We were friends … a long time ago,’ she said.
‘There is a rumour in Ithos that Demetrios had his heart broken. I don’t suppose you’d know anything about that?’ he asked her.
‘I’m afraid I don’t,’ said Shauna, genuinely puzzled. She was the one who had been banished, whose heart had been broken, not Demetrios.
She realized that the boat was headed towards Fengari Bay, where she and Demetrios had made love for the first time. So this must be where he had his boathouse. Why would he choose Fengari, of all places?
As they rounded the bay, the boathouse came into view. Shauna could see a small boat moored outside and only a handful of bathers further along the beach. The place still felt as secluded at it had always done.
Christian guided the boat alongside the jetty and helped her out. She looked towards the boathouse.
‘He’ll be inside,’ Christian said, regarding her with interest.
Suddenly full of trepidation, Shauna wasn’t sure she wanted to go in there alone. She turned to Christian, who’d made no move to get out of the speedboat. ‘Aren’t you coming in?’
He shook his head. ‘Maybe you old friends don’t need an audience. In fact, I think I’ll just coast along the bay for a little while, then come back for you later.’
He revved the motor and pulled away. Shauna stood there and didn’t move, fiddling anxiously with her thumbs. If Demetrios was inside, why hadn’t he heard the boat and come out to see who it was? The noise from the motor was hard to ignore.
Figuring it was time to grab the bull by the horns, she walked along the timber planks of the jetty, her sandals making little noise. The two bleached wooden doors were wide open and inside she could hear the sound of a tinny radio tuned to the lunchtime news.
As she entered the boathouse, she took in the sailing paraphernalia on the wall, a bookcase full of Penguin classics, tools on every surface. There were a number of boats in various stages of construction. A tarpaulin partially covered a small wooden boat and she could see a man working at one end, his head down as he focused on the task in hand.
She stood there for a moment, not sure of her next step, her heart thumping in her chest. Whether it was the wind ruffling her skirt or some other movement that caught his attention, the man looked up. ‘Can I help you?’
Shauna’s mouth dried up and no words would come. After all these years, all the times she’d thought about what she would say if she ever met Demetrios again, now that she was standing in front of him, her mind was blank.
Demetrios stood up and walked towards her. He was wearing an old T-shirt dotted with paint splatter, and a pair of loose khaki shorts. He could easily have been mistaken for some artisan craftsman, she thought, rather than the head of an international conglomerate. ‘I do not get many visitors to my boathouse, despoinída, you have taken a wrong turn perhaps?’ He came closer, smiling in welcome, but as he neared her, his smile faltered. Shauna took off her fedora, her red hair falling loosely about her shoulders.
‘Hello, Demetrios.’
They stood staring at each other in silence for a moment. Those achingly familiar gold-flecked hazel eyes were full of disbelief at what he was seeing. Now, rather than the fervour and passion of the young man that she remembered, there was caution and a touch of sorrow in them.
Demetrios cleared his throat and said, ‘Shauna, you came …’
He reached out to her and before she could stop him, he enveloped her in his arms, holding her tightly without speaking. Shauna found herself surrendering – a surge of emotion threatening to overthrow her composure. Instinctively she knew he felt the same as she did. She didn’t want to let go, to end this brief interlude and begin the painful conversation that she knew was coming. She drank in his familiar smell of citrus and sandalwood, now combined with an earthiness that spoke of days spent toiling with his hands. She pulled away.
‘It is good to see you,’ he told her.
She smiled and nodded, making no attempt to hide the fact that she felt the same way. ‘So this is your new office?’
He ran his hands through his hair and them wiped them on his shorts, the nervous movement showing his anxiety. ‘Call it the indulgence of a middle-aged man. Here I can pretend I am something else.’
‘Still trying to escape?’
He laughed ruefully. ‘Still trying, and still failing. But I forget my manners. I have little to entertain guests here, but I can offer a small hospitality.’ He pulled out two wooden folding beach chairs that were leaning against a wall and placed them just inside the doors of the boathouse so that they looked out over the sea. ‘Sit, please.’ Then he hurried off to a cool box in the corner and returned with two glasses and a bottle of retsina.
He filled a glass and handed it to her, then filled the second and raised it in a toast. ‘Here’s to …’ It took him a second or two to find the right words: ‘Here’s to you and your success. I always thought you had a very special quality and I am pleased that the rest of the world has appreciated it too.’
‘Thank you.’ She clinked glasses with him and took a sip of the cool, pungent wine. A little Dutch courage wouldn’t go amiss, she told herself.
‘I am so glad you chose to come here. I must apologize that I did not find out until recently that the Shauna O’Brien I knew all those years ago had become a famous actress. It was only a couple of years ago, when I caught a glimpse of you at Cannes—’
‘It’s a shame we didn’t see each other,’ she lied. ‘And there’s no reason you should have known. Our paths went in opposite directions.’
‘If I had known, I would have written to you sooner, to explain myself.’
‘There really is nothing to explain. We were young and from two different worlds. It could never have worked.’
Demetrios frowned. ‘I see. You think it was youthful infatuation?’
‘No one could expect a young man like you to have made a commitment to a girl like me. It was too much to ask – and so it proved.’
Demetrios took a slow sip of his drink and appeared to be weighing up his words. ‘I have always regretted that I didn’t try harder to find you. When Jeremy fired you, you left so quickly that I didn’t get a chance to—’
‘Honestly, Demetrios, there’s no need to drag up old feelings that don’t have any place now.’ Shauna knew she was being harsh, but she needed to be strong.
‘Then why did you come here?’
‘There is something that you need to know …’ She stood up and walked a few paces, steeling herself. ‘Something about us.’
He looked at her, unsure what was coming. Seeing how nervous she was, he nodded encouragingly but didn’t try to pressure her.
‘Well … my husband, Dan …’
‘I am so sorry for your loss. I saw the news and—’
‘He had an affair.’ She turned to him now.
‘Then he must have been crazy.’ Demetrios got up and took a step towards her.
‘He had an affair and there was child. Dan’s mistress called me, earlier this year … she had cancer and knew she didn’t have long to live. She was worried about her son – Dan’s son. Four years old, and he was about to be an orphan. She wanted me to take him in and give him the chances in life that she never could.’
‘And did you take him in?’
‘Yes …’ She breathed in deeply. ‘And I’m glad I did. I love him so much.’
‘You always had a big heart, Shauna.’
Shauna felt herself start to shake and Demetrios, seeing her distress, reached out to her, but she
backed away.
‘There’s something I have to tell you. And if I don’t do it now, I never will.’ She took a deep breath. ‘After I left Ithos, I went back to England, back to university … A few weeks later, I realized I was pregnant.’
A cloud passed over Demetrios’s face and his voice faltered. ‘I was careful … I don’t understand …’
‘Not careful enough.’
His face was anguished. ‘The child … did you …?’
‘I didn’t know what to do!’ she snapped. ‘I was nineteen years old. For as long as I could, I hid the truth. I wore big jumpers and baggy trousers so no one would know. Then I started skipping lectures. My tutor noticed, and came to see me at the flat I shared with Roxy.’
Demetrios worked his jaw. ‘And then what?’ he asked, his voice full of urgency.
‘I explained the situation. Joanna – the tutor – was wonderful. I was ready to drop out, but she told me not to rush into anything, to take my time working out my options.’ She swallowed. ‘I was only in my second year, you see.’
‘What did your parents say?’
Dredging up the long-buried memories was making her revisit the emotions too. Shauna’s eyes stung with tears, undermining her efforts to keep this as matter-of-fact as possible. She shook her head. ‘I could never have told my parents. They were Catholics … and it would have broken my father’s heart. I wasn’t brave enough, and I should have been.’ She choked on the words.
‘Shauna …’ Again Demetrios reached out to her, but she held her hands up.
‘You must let me speak.’ She took a deep breath to steady herself and went on: ‘Joanna put me in touch with an adoption agency. Roxy didn’t want me to do it, told me that she’d give up her studies too and we’d raise the baby together.’ Shauna swiped her tears away. ‘She meant it, too, every word. Roxy would have given up her dreams for me.’
Demetrios face twisted, trying to hold back his own tears. ‘Our child …’
Shauna couldn’t help a smiling at the memory of her. ‘She was the most beautiful little thing, Demetrios. She had a mass of dark hair like yours, and blue eyes – but the midwife told me that all babies have blue eyes when they are born.’
‘What happened to her?’
Shauna needed a moment to compose herself before continuing. She sat down and took a gulp of the wine. This was the hardest part of all. ‘I had signed the papers before she was born, but I knew it was the right thing – the best thing for her. We had an idyllic two days together. I couldn’t stop looking at her, she was such a perfect little thing, a miracle. When they came to take her away, they told me not to cry, that it would upset the child, so, I tried hard to be brave. I gave them a letter I had written, and asked them to give it to her when she was old enough.’
Demetrios kneeled down next to Shauna and held her hand as she continued. ‘She was asleep, her little rosebud lips slightly apart. I could hear her breathing. When I handed her over, she shuddered, her tiny hand reaching out for me before settling again. It was almost like she had reached out for me in her dreams … but I wasn’t there any more.’
For a moment they held hands in silence, united in their thoughts of the child they had created and then lost.
Then Demetrios wiped at his eyes, then shook his head. ‘What I will never understand is why you did not try to contact me,’ he said despairingly. ‘I could have helped … We could have found a way.’
His reaction lit a touchpaper. Shauna’s anger flared: ‘How dare you! I was banished from Ithos, and you never lifted a finger to help me.’
‘That isn’t true!’
‘Isn’t it? You didn’t even come to say goodbye. Instead, you let your mother do your dirty work for you, just like you let your family decide your future. You could have fought for me, but you didn’t.’
Demetrios looked back at her, speechless at first. Then he asked, ‘My mother? What does she have to do with this?’
‘Don’t tell me you don’t know!’
‘The day you left, I had gone to my parents’ villa. The business was in trouble and Sofía’s father was prepared to bail us out, provided I made an “alliance” with his daughter. When I came back to the boat, you were gone.’
‘Your mother had me thrown off the island. She came to the boat, told me that I was a fool to think that you loved me.’
Shauna saw a look of realization cross his face, then it hardened and he balled up his fists, his voice seething with rage and frustration. ‘I found out afterwards that Jeremy had fired you, but I had no idea that my mother …’ He reached out and held her by her shoulders, entreating her. ‘When they told me I must agree to marry Sofía in order to save the business, I refused. I said no, Shauna. I was in love with you, so I told my mother that I would choose my own wife.’
‘I don’t understand. Why didn’t you come back to the boat to get me?’
‘My mother was angry, she stormed out. I stayed on to talk some more with my father, to see if there was some other way we could save the business. She must have gone straight to the boat. She couldn’t get her way through me, so she punished you.’ The truth sat between them. After all this time, they finally knew what had really happened that day. But what use was it now, Shauna thought? The truth had come too late to change anything. ‘By the time I got to the harbour, you were gone. I looked for you … tried to track you down … but I knew so little about you.’
‘I saw your wedding announcement – your mother got what she wanted.’
‘Not right away. I looked for you, but I couldn’t even find out where you had got off the ferry. I would have asked Chantelle, but the morning after you left she handed in her notice and took the first ferry out of Ithos.’
‘At least someone showed a bit of loyalty. You still married Sofía.’
‘I had no way to trace you …’
‘Out of sight, out of mind. You forgot about me.’
‘No!’
‘Yes. Look, this is all so pointless. I came here because I needed to tell you about our daughter. For years, I tried to bury the memories because it was too painful, not knowing whether she was happy, whether I’d made the right decision. I tried to trace her through the adoption agency but they refused to help, and my lawyers say there’s nothing I can do. I would give anything to be able to see her, to explain why I had to give her up, and to let her know that even though we were only together for such a short time, I loved her more than I’ve ever loved anyone before or since.’
Demetrios nodded sadly. ‘You know, Shauna, when I wrote to you, I hoped that we could pick up where we left off, that our love would be the same, but I see now that we are not the same people. It was foolish of me to dream.’
He looked so desolate that she almost reached out to him, but she stopped herself. He was right, the spell was broken. She had done what she had come here to do, and now it was time to go.
‘I must head back, Alex will be wondering where I am.’
‘Is that your husband’s son?’
‘Yes. He’s the brightest, sweetest, most loving little boy you could wish to meet.’
‘He is lucky to have you.’
‘It’s the other way round, Demetrios. He’s filled a little bit of that hole in my heart.’
The rumble of an approaching speedboat signalled Christian’s return. He waved to them. Shauna turned to Demetrios. ‘I want to go back to Ithos now.’
‘Of course, as you wish. I will take you myself, in my own boat. I will signal Christian.’
Shauna picked up her fedora and underneath there was a volume of Sappho’s poetry. She smiled. ‘Your favourite.’
‘Always. As she says: “Farewell, go and remember me …”’
‘As if I could ever forget you.’ Their eyes met for a moment, so much emotion suspended in the air between them. She looked away. ‘What’s underneath the tarpaulin?’
Demetrios paused. ‘Oh, just another “flight of fancy”, as you would say. Come, let us go.’
&
nbsp; Shauna put her hat on and collected her bag, casting a last glance at Fengari Bay as Demetrios turned his boat towards Ithos harbour.
Chapter 30
Ariana looked at the brightly coloured scarves hanging from one of the stalls in Ithos market. She took a midnight-blue tasselled scarf from its hanger and tried it on, admiring herself in the mirror. The stallholder gave her an encouraging smile, but Ariana shook her head and gave it to the woman to put back. She drifted around some of the other stalls while keeping an eye out for Christian, her heart quickening at the sound of a speedboat coming in. She was surprised to see it was her father at the helm, and there was an attractive redhead with him.
Ariana watched through curious eyes as her father helped the woman disembark on to the jetty. They exchanged a few words, embraced briefly, and then her father was alone. He stood for a few moments, watching as the woman disappeared out of sight up the winding path that let past their own villa and up to the hills beyond.
Ariana felt sure that the woman was Shauna Jackson, the famous actress. Their family had always had celebrity friends, but they were mostly from mainland Europe. Her father took a tennis holiday every year with Viggo Mortensen, and Ralph Fiennes occasionally came to the island and hung out at the villa, but this was a surprise. As far as Ariana knew, Shauna Jackson had never visited Ithos before. She resolved to ask Teresa – if anyone would know who the woman was, she would – but right now she had other plans.
Her father headed towards the taverna and Ariana saw Níko come out to meet him. They spoke for a few minutes, Níko clapped him on the shoulder and the two men went inside. It looked as if it was going to be one of those days when they would open a bottle of retsina and throw the cork away.
Ariana looked at her Gucci watch; it was only mid-afternoon, but her father had clearly finished work for the day. Christian must still be at the boathouse. There wouldn’t be a better chance to catch him; she’d have him to herself there. She paused at a stall that sold dresses and checked herself out in their mirror; her bikini was clearly visible under the floor-length see-through white dress she wore. Perfect.
Under a Greek Moon Page 23
