Gathering Shadows

by Nancy Mehl

  I kissed Lazarus on the head. “Lazarus came back from the dead, and he may have kept me from dying. Quite a special dog.”

  Reuben reached over and patted the beautiful golden retriever’s head. “Yes, he is that.”

  I closed my eyes and we rode back to Esther’s in silence. There was so much going through my mind. The pieces of our crazy puzzle had finally come together. They’d begun to form a picture I could understand, although there were still a few questions I had no answers to. Would finding Ryan become a big story in the media? Would my father get in trouble for exchanging babies in a hospital twenty-three years ago? How would my mother respond to all of this? And what about Ryan? Did he still love us? Had he recognized me when I talked to him in the restaurant?

  I could tell that the effects of the drug were wearing off. My body wanted to rest, but my mind was going a hundred miles a minute.

  “Here we are,” Reuben said suddenly.

  I looked up and saw Esther and Janet waiting on the front porch. We’d just parked the truck when Dad pulled up next to us in his car, Zac in the passenger seat.

  “Where’s Paul?”

  “Back at the station, questioning Rae.”

  Reuben jumped out of the truck and came around to my side. He opened the door and put his arm around me. “Step out slowly. Don’t move too fast.”

  I laughed. “I’m not an invalid, Reuben.”

  “I know that, but I don’t want you to get dizzy again.”

  I swung my feet around and Reuben lifted me down. Lazarus jumped out behind me, staying right by my side.

  “Thanks be to God, you’re okay,” Esther said as we approached.

  “I’m fine,” I said. When we reached the porch, I put my arms around Janet. “Thank you so much,” I said, my voice breaking. “You helped to save my life.”

  “Oh, my goodness,” she said breathlessly. “I just wish I’d said something sooner. Maybe things wouldn’t have gotten so serious.”

  “Oh, Janet,” Esther said, “just take the girl’s thanks and feel good about it. You’re a hero!”

  I let Janet go and was tickled to see her blush. “I’m just glad to have helped you,” she said quietly. “For once, butting into other people’s business turned out to be a good thing.”

  “You can butt into my business anytime,” Esther said with a smile. She gave her friend a big hug. “I’m so thankful to have a wonderful friend like you.”

  Janet didn’t answer, but I could tell she was pleased. “I’d better get back home,” she said, still red from all the attention she was getting. “Murphy needs to be fed.”

  “You feed him and then get back over here,” Esther said. “You’re invited for dinner tonight. We need to celebrate Wynter’s rescue. You be here at five-thirty. We’ll eat at six.”

  “Thank you. I’d love to.”

  Esther nodded. “Good.” She turned her attention to the rest of us. “Now, let’s get this young lady into the house. My goodness, she’s filthy. Let’s get you out of those dirty clothes.”

  I let Esther guide me upstairs. After making sure I was steady on my feet, she took my muddy clothes while I got in the shower. The hot water felt wonderful. I stood under it, allowing the water to wash away the grime while my mind sorted through the thoughts that bombarded me.

  My father’s decision on the night I was born was made out of grief over losing a child and compassion for his wife. What he’d done, he’d done out of love. Because of it, I’d found a family. It wasn’t a perfect family, but I doubted that anything like that really existed. The world was full of imperfect people. And maybe that was good enough. We had a hard road ahead of us. My mother would have to confront the death of her natural daughter, and all of us would have to find a way to deal with the past.

  I couldn’t help but think about the child who didn’t live. She felt close to me. Like a sister. My tears mixed with the water that coursed down my body. Who was she? What kind of person would she have been? Would she have liked me? Was I the kind of daughter she never got the chance to be?

  Then there was Ryan. Would he want anything to do with us, or would he choose to walk away? We’d lost so many years, but with a little love and understanding, maybe we could make the most of the time we had left.

  Through everything that had happened, one thing had become clear. God had been there the entire time. Never leaving me. Never disappearing. Whatever happened, my relationship with Him had changed. My life had stopped in one moment of time, and now it would begin again—in another moment. This moment.

  I prayed right then and there, asking His forgiveness for putting other things in front of Him and recommitting my heart and life to His will for me. The water that washed me felt like a baptism, and by the time I got out of the shower I felt different. Lighter.

  As I dressed, I understood that the days ahead would be full of difficulties and blessings. But with God’s help, I was ready to face whatever I had to. The path God had for me lay ahead, and I couldn’t wait to find out where it led.

  Chapter

  Twenty-Seven

  “Before they get here, I wanted to make sure you don’t have any other questions.” Paul was in street clothes, and I marveled at how different he looked. Although he wasn’t here in an official capacity, we’d asked him to stay until they arrived. He was the one who had explained the truth to the Fishers. Then he’d set up this meeting. It had been four days since Marian Belker forced me into the shelter under her clinic. Today was the day we’d all been waiting for.

  “Tell me exactly what Ryan said when you spoke to him,” Mom said.

  My mother, whom I’d seen as fragile, had been a source of encouragement and strength since learning the truth about the past. Dealing with the death of her biological daughter wasn’t easy, but her love for me hadn’t changed at all. As she told me, “You are my daughter, Emily. Nothing in this world could change that.” And although she had every right to be angry with my father, instead, she seemed touched by his attempt to protect her from sorrow. During my father’s confession, Mom actually asked him to forgive her for turning her back on his pain. “I should have been there for you, Lyndon,” she’d said. “Instead, I needed someone to blame. I’m sorry it was you.”

  “At first he denied he was Ryan,” Paul said. “But after I explained what really happened—that you didn’t give him away, and that you did everything you could to find him, he finally opened up. The Fishers were stunned. They’d believed Joe Belker’s lies that Ryan was an abused child who needed protection. They never heard the news reports about Ryan’s abduction, so they just named him after their dead son and moved him into their family. Belker was right in his belief that sending Ryan to live with a conservative Mennonite family would keep him away from prying eyes.

  “By the time the Fishers moved here, the stories about Ryan had pretty much subsided. Even if someone could have recognized him from past newscasts, no one made the connection between the boy in the pictures and a Mennonite boy living in a small town. People weren’t looking in Sanctuary. It was the perfect cover.”

  “But he said he wanted to see us?” Mom asked. Paul had already assured her on this point several times. It was obvious Mom was nervous.

  “Yes, he does. Very much. Ever since he saw you in the restaurant, Wynter. He recognized you immediately. In fact, he followed you. Watched you, trying to decide what to do.”

  I nodded. “I saw him outside Esther’s the first night I was in town. Although I didn’t notice him again, I had the feeling I was being watched.”

  “That’s because you were. Ryan wanted to talk to you, wanted to contact you, but he was afraid the Fishers would get in trouble, and he loves them very much. They’re very nice people, and they feel awful for everything you’ve been through.”

  “This must be hard on them too,” I said.

  Paul nodded. “Yes, it is. But they want the best for Ryan—and for you.”

  “How could Joe Belker do something so evil?” M
om asked. “Taking our child because Lyndon refused to pay any more blackmail money?”

  Paul shrugged. “It was strictly revenge. He targeted Ryan, and when he finally caught him alone, he took him. Called himself Bill Martin. Ryan was convinced he was a neighbor. I guess Belker was very persuasive.” He shook his head. “The Belkers were quite a couple. No sense of right or wrong. But in the end, Marian’s lack of conscience betrayed Joe. In her mind, killing him made sense. She did it because she didn’t want to steal any more babies. She still sees herself as misunderstood. Someone just trying to do the right thing.”

  “I thank God Zac survived one of her attempts to do the right thing,” I said. “If he’d eaten all that fudge, he might not have made it.”

  Paul nodded. “She took a chance putting that candy in your room. Anyone could have gotten into it. You might have mentioned it to Esther when you found it.”

  “I guess she was so desperate she was willing to try anything.”

  Esther and Reuben had gone to The Oil Lamp for lunch so we could be together as a family. Oddly, with them gone, I felt as if some of my family were missing.

  “That’s true.” Paul shook his head. “I don’t know if she will ever take responsibility for her actions. But it’s in the state’s hands now. They’ll decide what to do with her.”

  “I feel sorry for August,” I said. “When he found out the truth, he tried to help.”

  “If he hadn’t been so reluctant to betray Rae, he might have saved his life,” Paul said. “He hoped that by sending you those clippings you would find a way to link them back to Rae. And the note he sent to you, Lyndon, was designed to bring you to Sanctuary. I’m not sure why. Maybe he thought you’d recognize Marian. He hoped one of you would put the pieces together so he wouldn’t be the one responsible for her arrest. Even with everything she’d done, he still loved her.”

  “We know now why Marian didn’t stay for dinner the night she came over to Esther’s,” I said. “When she found out you were coming, Dad, she was afraid you’d realize who she was.”

  My father shook his head. “I’m afraid August and Marian were both wrong about that. I can’t remember what she looked like twenty-three years ago. There’s no chance I would have recognized her now.”

  “Will Marian be charged with two murders?” Mom asked.

  “I have no idea. Illinois and Missouri are trying to decide who gets her—and for what. It will take some time to sort everything out. The important thing to realize is that she can’t hurt you anymore.”

  “And what about Ryan?” I asked. “Will our story end up in the press?”

  “I don’t know that either. Everything has been turned over to the authorities. What happens after that is up to them. I think you have to be prepared for anything. Besides Ryan’s abduction, there’s the kidnapping of seven babies to deal with. Searching for them will certainly garner national press. You need to discuss the possibility of media attention with the Fishers and together decide what to do. The best thing might be to go into hiding. I know they’d rather not leave their farm.” He gave me a quick smile. “Maybe you could take Ryan back to St. Louis for a while. Give yourselves some time to get reacquainted.”

  “That might be a little difficult,” I said. “I’ll only be there a couple more weeks. You see, I’m moving.”

  Paul’s eyebrows shot up. “Moving? I thought you’d stay near Ryan now that you’ve found him.”

  I smiled at him. “Well, if he stays in Sanctuary, we’ll be very close.”

  “You mean . . . ?”

  “Yes, I’m moving here. Esther is putting me up. I’ve decided to do some writing. And there’s a certain farmer I want to spend some time with.” I sighed. “If you’d told me a couple of weeks ago that I’d walk away from my job at the station, I’d have said you were crazy. But now I can’t imagine going back.”

  “And Zac?”

  “He’s staying at KDSM, but he’s promised to visit. Esther is still determined to teach him to cook.”

  Paul laughed. “I’m glad you’re coming back, Wynter. Sanctuary would miss you.”

  I looked over at my mother and father. Mom’s eyes kept darting to the front door. She’d been waiting a long time for Ryan, and today that waiting was coming to an end. I saw my father reach over and take her hand. She grabbed on to him like a drowning woman finding a life preserver. When they looked at each other, it was as if time hadn’t passed at all. My father was still the handsome man my mother had fallen in love with, and Mom was still the young, beautiful girl who turned heads when she walked down the street. Maybe others could see the changes age had brought, but at that moment, I only saw them the way they’d been when Ryan and I were young.

  “Actually, you can call me Emily,” I said. “I don’t think I need Wynter anymore. She’s retiring.”

  He smiled. “Nice to meet you, Emily.”

  “And I’m happy to meet you, Paul.”

  The sound of a horse’s whinny came from outside. Mom stood to her feet and Dad followed her.

  “Are you ready?” Paul asked.

  I laughed lightly. “We’ve been ready for a long, long time.”

  When the door opened and Ryan stepped inside, he caught my eye and smiled. Tonight I’d sleep sweetly, and the voices in my head would be silent. As my parents approached him, the shadows we’d gathered for years were swept away in an instant, and together we walked into a future full of light, love, and promise.

  Acknowledgments

  My thanks to the awesome Mark Bogner for his help in creating KDSM, a fictional news station in St. Louis. Mark is the kind of guy who is driven to help people, whether he’s warning them about the weather or peering into their ears as a hearing instrument specialist. The stars in your crown will be many, my friend.

  Thanks to my wonderful daughter-in-love, Shaen, for reading through this story and helping me punch it into shape. Love you, honey.

  To my son, Danny: Thank you for taking me “through the mines” since I couldn’t get there myself. I love you.

  Love and hugs to my “Inner Circle”: Mary G., Larry, Tammy, Michelle D., Cheryl, Rhonda, Susan, Karla, Lynne, Mary S., Michelle M., Bonnie, JoJo, and Zac. And to Zac: Still waiting for that ponytail! LOL!

  To the incredible Kim Sawyer: Thank you for allowing me to use your kitties in my book. I love them all. And thank you for letting me spend time at the beautiful King’s Inn. It was such a privilege.

  As always, thanks to Raela Schoenherr and Sharon Asmus. I’m so blessed to have you both in my life—even when the edits are so extensive it makes me think about changing my name to Gertrude and moving to Canada, eh?

  And most of all, my thanks to God, who has given me this wonderful opportunity—and kept me from becoming Canadian.

  Nancy Mehl is the author of fifteen books and received the ACFW Mystery Book of the Year Award in 2009. She has a background in social work and is a member of ACFW and RWA. She writes from her home in Missouri, where she lives with her husband, Norman, and their Puggle, Watson. Visit her website at www.nancymehl.com.

  Books by Nancy Mehl

  * * *

  FINDING SANCTUARY

  Gathering Shadows

  ROAD TO KINGDOM

  Inescapable

  Unbreakable

  Unforeseeable

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