by M. L. Rice
A flash of Leah’s bare back flashed into her memory. Shivering slightly, she shook her head to clear it of the image. Why in the hell would that come up now? And what was up with the butterflies trying to make a daring escape from the confines of her stomach?
She realized Arati and Jennifer were staring at her, trying to gauge her reaction, and she wanted to make damn sure they couldn’t see the confusion that was bubbling up from the inner depths of her psyche.
“Well, I guess it’s good to know that nice people like me too and not just overly horny assholes.” She tried to smile as if the news she had just heard hadn’t rocked her, but she knew it must look forced.
Chapter Six
Forty, forty-one, forty-two, forty-three…Bryce counted in her head. Her arms were shaking as she repeatedly lowered herself to the floor in full-on push-up mode. A bead of sweat dripped from the tip of her nose onto the tan carpet below.
50! She collapsed onto the ground, breathing heavily. She had been working out in her room for a full hour, trying to exercise through all of the crazy thoughts going through her head. It had been two days since she had learned about Leah’s crush, and she couldn’t think clearly. Every time she saw her in the hallway at school she would smile awkwardly, her heart would skip a beat, and she would purposefully take whichever hallway got her away from Leah as fast as possible.
She found herself repeatedly thinking about the kindness Leah had shown when she had been feeling so low, and the thought of being physically close to her was disconcertingly appealing for some reason.
What was going on?
Exhausted, she finally got to her feet and flopped heavily onto her bed where she meditated in silence for a while, just trying to piece her thoughts together. She didn’t know how long she was there, but she jumped as her ringtone blared from her iPhone. She fumbled for the device on her bedside table. She didn’t recognize the number.
“Hello?”
“Bryce? Hey, it’s Leah.”
“Oh! Hey!” Her voice cracked as it hit about an octave higher than normal. She cleared her throat and overcompensated by speaking in a low, breathy whisper. “I mean…hey.” Bryce smacked her forehead in embarrassment at her extreme uncoolness. She heard what might have been a chuckle on the other side of the line.
“Hey. I’m in your neighborhood and just wanted to see if you were okay and maybe wanted to hang out. Go to a movie or something.”
Bryce was silent for a beat too long.
“Or…or not. Just, you know, I was in the neighborhood and bored so…yeah, never mind. I’m sure you’re busy. Don’t worry about it.”
“No!” Bryce said quickly. “I mean, yes, let’s do something. Are you nearby?”
Bryce swore she could actually hear Leah smile.
“Yeah, I’m just around the corner. I’ll come over. See ya in a bit.”
“Yeah, see ya.”
Bryce hung up and sat stunned by her emotions. When Leah’s voice had drifted out of her phone, adrenaline had shot through her body with a mixture of excitement and anxiety. If she didn’t know any better she’d think she was crushing on Leah too.
Faster than she had been expecting it, the doorbell rang downstairs and the sound of her mother welcoming Leah into the house forced Bryce into action. She looked at her reflection in the mirror and jumped to her feet in a panic. She was sweaty, her hair was a tangled mess, and her tight tank top was damp from her workout.
She tried to put her hair into a more presentable ponytail and was able to shove her free weights into the corner, but before she could put on a clean shirt there was a knock at her door.
Shit.
She opened the door slowly, peeking through the crack.
“Hey, Leah.”
“Hey.”
She realized she was being rude as she stared in silence from inside her room, so she sighed and opened the door all of the way.
“Come on in. Sorry about the mess. I was working out.”
Bryce couldn’t help but notice the up-and-down look Leah gave her. She swore she saw appreciation in her eyes. Bryce’s embarrassment quickly shifted to confidence and she was suddenly more proud of her body than usual. An overwhelming urge to strut around the room and show off fell upon her.
That had never happened before.
Instead, Bryce said, “Sorry about this.” She gestured to her clothes. “Let me go take a shower and I’ll be ready to go.”
Leah’s eyes were wide and she swallowed hard, but she tried unsuccessfully to look relaxed and just nodded. Maybe there was something to what Jennifer and Arati had said after all. Now that she was looking for it, Leah did act differently around her. Bryce’s heart leaped. She pulled a clean T-shirt out of the closet and turned to Leah, holding it up to model it off as she did. The shirt had an image of an old-fashioned microphone on it and Bryce asked, “How’s this? I got it at that music festival last year.” She held it close to her chest so that every curve could be seen.
“Fine. It’s cool,” Leah answered quietly.
Okay. That was it. She was flirting! With Leah. She had never overtly flirted in her life, and here she was, flirting with a girl! What in the world had come over her?
“Shower! Showering now. Be right back,” she said as she hurried out of the room.
*
“So. Now that I don’t smell like a dirty locker room, what do you want to do? Movie, right?”
“Whatever you want. I was just completely bored at home. Angela spends all of her time with that douche bag Jeff ever since they hooked up at Jennifer’s party. Ugh.”
“Well, I’m trying to save money, but I do have a decent selection of movies. If you don’t mind hanging out here again.” Bryce gestured to her far wall where a bookshelf stacked full of DVDs stood.
Leah smiled. “Why do I have an online movie account when I could just come over here all of the time?”
There was a soft knock on the door. Bryce yelled out, “Yeah?”
Her mother’s voice could be heard muffled from the other side. “Do you girls need anything? Snacks or something?”
Bryce looked at Leah, who shook her head and said, “No, I’m good. Already ate.”
“No thanks, Mom.”
“Do you want to join your dad and me for a movie in the living room?”
“No, we’re okay.”
“Are you sure? We’re watching The Robe for our Bible study.”
Bryce grimaced and looked at Leah, her cheeks flushing. Leah only smiled kindly.
“No, Mom. We’re good. Thanks. Go away now, please.”
“Okay, just let me know if you need anything.”
“Bye!”
They heard her mother walk back down the stairs and Bryce shook her head in embarrassment.
“Sorry about her.”
“Why? She seems nice.”
“Yeah. She’s nice. As long as you think the way she does. So anyway, what do you want to watch?”
They settled on Bringing Up Baby, a 1930s-era romantic comedy from Bryce’s collection of classics, and got comfortable on the bed, her portable computer set up between them to show the film.
Bryce found she was having trouble concentrating on Katharine Hepburn’s witty banter because she could practically feel Leah’s warmth so close to her. By the time the movie ended she discovered that she had unconsciously shifted to sit so close to Leah that their legs were almost touching.
“So. Did you like it?” Bryce asked nervously. For some reason she was desperate for Leah’s approval of the choice.
“Totally.” She smiled sincerely. “Anything with Katharine Hepburn and a big cat is a winner in my book.”
Bryce closed her computer and set it on her bedside table. As she turned back to Leah, she settled into a cross-legged position.
“Do you need to go home now?”
Leah’s mouth twitched. “Not really. I already wrote my last paper for Economics yesterday. I’m pretty much done for the year. Ready to graduate and get
out of the house, you know?”
Bryce sighed. “I do indeed. I’m so damn excited to get to the academy that I could just spit.”
A melodic laugh escaped from Leah’s lips. “Elegant, Bryce.”
She shrugged. “That’s me. Perfect pretty princess. Born and raised.”
Leah laughed again and Bryce’s mouth went dry as she watched her run her slender fingers through her dark curls. She tried to speak, but instead only croaked, “Where?”
“What?”
Bryce tried to cough demurely before saying, “Sorry. Where are you going to college?”
“Oh.” Leah smiled. “SSU. I mean, I got a full ride for my GPA, so that’s hard to turn down, you know? My parents have promised not to pry once I start living in the dorm, but man, do I wish I was going to be in a different city.”
“You know what?” Bryce tilted her head to the side.
“What?”
“I’m really going to miss you.”
Bryce saw Leah’s chest rise beneath her thin T-shirt as she started breathing faster.
“I mean, don’t get me wrong, but I’m bummed that you’ve always been so shy.”
Leah paused. “I’m going to miss you too. I’ve always…liked you.”
Bryce tentatively reached out and took Leah’s hand. Leah was trembling.
“Promise you won’t forget me?”
“I could never forget you, Bryce.”
They stared into each other’s eyes for a while before Bryce finally asked, “What are you thinking?”
Leah took a deep breath. “I don’t think you want to know.”
“Come on, Leah, we’re friends now. You can tell me anything.”
“I’m thinking…I’m thinking that I really want to kiss you.”
That was all Bryce needed to hear. She leaned forward and placed the softest of kisses on the corner of Leah’s mouth.
When her lips felt the impossible softness of Leah’s, her body shuddered and she found that she couldn’t pull away. Leah’s mouth formed a surprised “Oh!” but even as she gasped she moved her head to kiss Bryce back.
They wrapped their arms around each other and tentatively explored each other’s lips. This was what Bryce had been hoping to feel with Michael before he had so blatantly overstepped her boundaries. And she was having these feelings for another girl! This wasn’t the rough, forceful kiss of Michael; it was a gentle, loving caress that was more amazing than she could have ever imagined. It felt…right.
So slowly that the movement was almost imperceptible, Leah leaned into the contact and kissed Bryce with even more hunger and desperation. Heat coursed through Bryce’s stomach and she leaned forward to press herself against Leah until they were lying together on the bed.
With gut-wrenching suddenness, the image of Michael forcing himself on her popped into Bryce’s head and she jerked away from the contact. She rolled off Leah and sat hugging her knees on the far side of the bed. Leah immediately jumped up from the bed and ran to stand in front of Bryce, putting her hands on Bryce’s shaking shoulders.
“Bryce? Are you okay?” Her voice was unsteady.
Bryce’s eyes were full of tears, but even so, when she looked into Leah’s face she saw worry, hurt, and confusion. “I’m so sorry, Leah. I didn’t mean to…”
“No, Bryce, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I didn’t mean to freak you out. I won’t tell anyone about this, I swear. I’m so so sorry.” Desperation poured from her like a heavy fog.
Bryce shook her head, looking down again. “No, it’s not that. I just…I thought about Michael…” Her voice trailed off.
“Oh my God, Bryce. Damn it, I’m sorry.” Leah pulled her into a careful and hesitant hug. “Let me know if there is anything I can do. I feel so stupid. You just got assaulted and here I am—”
“No! Leah, this is not your fault. You were…you are amazing.” She pulled away from the hug and looked up into her friend’s green eyes. “You’re…you’re beautiful, Leah.”
Leah’s face broke into a wide smile and she gently stroked Bryce’s cheek. “You’re beautiful and amazing, Bryce.” She sat down gently on the bed beside her. “You know, I’ve had a crush on you since junior high. You have no idea how you make me feel.”
Bryce sniffed and laughed. “I’m starting to figure it out.”
“What do you need me to do?”
“Can you…just hold me for a little while?”
Leah nodded as if that were the easiest request in the world.
Chapter Seven
Bryce trudged downstairs the next morning, only minutes before she had to leave for school. Leah hadn’t spent the night, but Bryce had been unable to sleep because of the hurricane of emotions swirling around in her head. She hadn’t been able to make herself get up for her run since “the incident,” and when she saw her parents downstairs waiting for her, she felt a cold ball of ice form in her stomach.
“Morning,” she said, trying to act nonchalant as she reached for a cereal bar from the cupboard.
“Bryce, sit down, please.” Her father was sitting in his normal chair at the kitchen table, but this time he didn’t have his usual cup of coffee or newspaper nearby. His hands were clasped in front of him and he sat up straight with a look on his face like that of a CEO about to discipline an underling.
“I have to leave for school in like three minutes, guys.”
“Bryce…sit down.”
She did as she was told.
Her mom spoke. “Honey, what’s going on with you?”
“What do you mean?”
“You’ve been acting strangely ever since the prom.”
Bryce’s mind raced. Yes, she had been on an emotional roller coaster for the last five days, but she couldn’t for the life of her remember acting differently around her parents. She honestly didn’t think that they could be that observant anyway.
“What do you mean?”
“You haven’t gotten up for your run in almost a week, and you haven’t said two words together to us until this morning. Arati and Jennifer haven’t been over in a while either. Did you guys get into a fight? Does it have something to do with that Leah girl? We’re worried about you.”
“I’m fine, Mom and no, I’m not fighting with anyone. I’m just ready to graduate and get to the academy.”
Bryce’s parents stared at her without speaking. She shifted uncomfortably in her chair. Finally, her mother said, “We’re not blind, Bryce. Something is going on and we want you to know that you can talk to us. We’re praying for you and you know that God has a plan for your life. Let Him in to your heart and you’ll feel so much better.”
Bryce suppressed a shudder. She hated it when her parents did this. She knew that they cared and were only saying these things because they loved her, but she still couldn’t stomach it.
“Okay, Mom. Can I go now? I’m going to be late for school.”
“Bryce?” Her father pinned her to the chair with his stern gaze. “We mean it. If there’s something bothering you, we want to know about it.”
“I’m fine, Dad. Seriously. I just have a bad case of senioritis. Is it not okay for me to take a break from my routine for a while?” She shrugged. “So can I go now? Please?”
“Go on, sweetie.” Her mom stood up with open arms, inviting Bryce into the embrace. “Remember, always trust in God and you’ll have nothing to fear.”
“’Kay. Bye, guys. Love you.”
Bryce pulled away from her mother and practically ran out the back door. As she drove her grandmother’s hand-me-down Cadillac to school, she replayed her every action from the past week, trying to determine how her parents had figured out that something was going on in her life. Sure, she hadn’t gone out for her runs, but so what? And it wasn’t like she had long, sit-down chats with them every night usually, so what was the deal?
Her grip on the steering wheel tightened. She was dealing with her own crap right now. She did not need her parents meddling in her life too. Sh
e sighed heavily and tried to relax before she ran the car into a telephone pole and added even more complications to an already strange sequence of events.
*
“Hey, Bryce.” A small, shy voice that she knew all too well roused her from her musings as she walked from her car to the school doors.
Bryce looked to the girl now walking beside her. “Hey, Dani. What’s up?” Her cheeks grew warm. This was the first time the two had spoken since Jennifer and Arati revealed that Daniela might have a crush on her too. Bryce realized she was staring at the soft skin of Daniela’s cheek. “Shit.”
“What?” Daniela replied, confused.
Bryce sighed. “Nothing. I’m just realizing…never mind. It’s nothing.”
“Oh. Okay.” Daniela looked anxious and shifted uncomfortably. “Well anyway. I just wanted to say hi. I haven’t seen you much since Saturday at the swim meet. Will you be back to work at the pool this weekend?” She smiled hopefully. “That guy you had sub for your swimming class is kind of an idiot.”
“Yeah, definitely. They just gave me the weekend off for the meet and the prom.” She shivered unconsciously every time she thought about that night. “And Dennis isn’t that bad. He’s just your normal, everyday high school stoner.”
“Yeah, and he’s not you.”
Bryce stopped mid-stride before walking up the stairs toward her English classroom.
Daniela took a few more steps and then stopped and turned around, flushed. “I mean you’re a much better teacher. He just had us kicking on the side of the pool for an hour. We’re way beyond that.” She hesitated before saying, “Anyway, gotta go. Bye!” She hurried off in the opposite direction, shaking her head. Bryce thought she heard her mumble, “Stupid, stupid, stupid…” as she walked away.
*
