There was a moment of silence, the kind of silence that builds when two people have no idea what to say to each other. I thought Roldan had indeed something to say, he was only biding his time.
He broke the quiet. “I think I know why you want to stay in the city.”
My interest piqued. “Oh, yea?”
“No one really knows how a Sisterhood works. Maybe you don’t even know yet.”
Annoyance flared in my stomach. He was correct: my knowledge of the Sisterhood was the basics. I had no idea what we did, who we did it for, and what motivated us. What I knew, was that I would learn more once I was sworn in. I imagined I could leave if I chose to go dark at all times, but then I would only be a slave to something different. My frustration at the lack of information built an annoying structure of unanswered questions in my mind.
“I don’t think you can leave the Sisterhood, maybe you are searching for a way out.”
“Oh . . . such intellect,” I taunted, the darker part of me seeming to form my words, growing agitated that I was stuck, trapped by this order. “Wasn’t expecting it. You appear as more muscle than sense.”
His jaw ticked as he casually glanced around the room as if he were just now noticing it was a brothel. “And you more whoring wench than witch. The place fits you.”
I smiled sweetly like he’d just complimented me. “What is it? The pouty lips?”
“Something like that.”
“You know, you might have been my favorite brother if you hadn’t killed me.”
“If I had just kidnapped you instead?” he said, dark amusement pulling on his lips.
I frowned, twirling my wine glass. It did sound silly, didn’t it? Blame it on my grandmother. She’s the one who made this story.
I got to my feet, moving to stand in front of the fountain. The air was hot and sweltering and oppressive, so much so that a slight breeze would do wonders. Too bad I couldn’t seem to force a little wind; whatever changes I could do to the weather only seemed to happen without my control.
I heard Roldan set his glass on the table before coming to stand beside me.
Just to appease the tense atmosphere, we both regarded the woman pouring water in the fountain as if she were the newest masterpiece by some artistic scholar. Silence, and the memory of his blood-stained hands were wedged, bluntly so, in the foot of space between us.
The fact that, even in this state, my body still tensed in fear as he stood inches from me, made a dark rush of hatred burn through me. “Roldan, what do you want?”
He lifted a shoulder. “The seal. I want it open.”
My stomach fell in shock, my cool expression wavering. And for a moment I wondered if my mind was playing tricks on me, that if somehow, I was being deceived by the dark inside me. But then the hot air, the smell of jasmine, and a glance in his direction told me that this was reality.
A maniacal laugh bubbled up my throat. “What a tangled web we weave.”
“Listen to what I have to say, then make your decision,” he said indifferently, standing with his hands in his pockets, his gaze in front of him like he hadn’t killed me for the exact thing he was now asking me to do.
Heat flared inside me. “Did you listen to what I had to say before thrusting your blade in my stomach?”
“You would have done the same to protect your own.”
That calmed a bit of my ire. I knew it to be true; I would have done anything.
Roldan glanced down at me, sizing all five-five of me up. “You like my brother?”
I frowned in thought, a little surprised by the question. “It’s a little more complicated than all that.”
“Isn’t it always?”
My brows knitted. “What’s it matter to you anyway?”
“Whether or not what I’m going to tell you will have any merit.” He paused, waiting for me to admit whether I liked his bastard of a brother or not.
I felt like a child who had to admit they had a crush on someone. It sucked. “I wouldn’t step on his fingers if he were hanging off a cliff,” I offered with a lift of my shoulder.
“Good enough for me,” he said.
Yea, because I was sure that was the closest way Titans showed they loved one another: not save each other, but not push each other over the ledge either.
“What we are, we don’t have a name—at least not anymore.”
My heart jumped that he was actually going to tell me who, or what Weston was. The thought sent anticipation zinging through me.
“Words are important here, I’m sure you know. And since our kind went rogue after the magic was sealed, any mentioning of us in books was erased from the land. We were—are—the nightmare you had as a child.
“Other kingdoms, weaker people, wanted us destroyed; and therefore, the idea of us had to be gone. Mentioning even what we were, could be carried on the wind, creating us once again. And so, hundreds of years went on, and we completely disappeared from memories, the only fleeting idea—the monster in your nightmares.
“Before the magic was sealed, we were the most feared race. We were the strongest—every advantage given to us. Built like predators, we fought like it too—but we had a flaw, one that destroyed us. We could turn our humanity, or sanity, on and off. A basic survival instinct to conquer more land, more villages, more people, without guilt, without remorse. To do what we were created to do.
“Many chose to flip the switch; it was easier that way. Our nature is to conquer. Denying it causes boredom to settle in like insanity,” he said as if from experience. “Therefore, anything that keeps our interest, even mildly so, we hold onto it.” He looked at me meaningfully. “What I did to you . . . it went against the order we’ve found amongst each other. Anything that can keep one of us from tedium, from madness, is off limits to the other, and I broke that code. But I’m not asking you for this out of some remorseful notion.”
“That’s what it sounds like,” I said vaguely, my head spinning with answers, sweet, sweet, answers.
“Because we could turn our humanity off, we were unpredictable, dangerous and untrustworthy. The only way we remained as a unified people, was having a leader who ruled ruthlessly, a dictator who put fear into everyone. But when the magic was sealed, our ability to control our humanity dissolved, and we scattered, never returning as one again.”
My brows knitted. “What does that mean, your humanity dissolved?”
“That at a certain point in our life, our humanity shuts off completely, and it does not turn back on.”
My heart stilled, cold. “And when does this occur specifically?”
“Around thirty.”
“And how old is Weston?” When he didn’t respond right away, I said harshly, “What age?”
“Thirty.”
The word settled around us like the world’s greatest secrets were just shared, and we needed a moment to take it all in.
My throat felt thick. “And what happens when one loses their humanity?”
“They usually go rogue. And they don’t come back. If they do, it’s usually not good for anyone.”
My head spun, explanations for every one of Weston’s actions, reasons he fit the ‘assassin’ persona so well, whirling around in my mind like a spin-top. Did I somehow amuse him, keep him from a tedious routine, the madness, as Roldan had said? If that was true, then what was he like while I’d been gone? Did I even have to ask that question? He killed his father.
Apprehension ran through me like icy water, my heart offbeat. “Does that have something to do with why Weston wants me out of the south?”
“I’m not sure what he has planned. But he’s lived here all of his childhood. We’re still connected to our past life; our feelings about it, the people in it, become even stronger. If he plans on staying in the south, I promise you don’t want to be here as well.”
I couldn’t decide what I should feel. If the uncertainty curling in my stomach from realizing why Weston wanted the seal open all along, was overpowering th
e sweet relief of why he wanted me to leave. And if the darkness inside me was somehow motivating me either way, swimming in the recesses of my stomach, waiting for its chance to lunge.
“You’re next, aren’t you?” I asked emotionlessly.
“Twenty-eight.”
I let out a bitter laugh. “So opening the seal will save you and your brother’s sane life.”
“And my sisters’, and my daughter’s. And all of my people scattered out there waiting for their day to come.”
“And ruin more lives than it would save,” I said dryly.
He shrugged. “Survival of the fittest. The minds that cannot handle the magic weren’t meant to be here in the first place. Humans never had a place on Alyria. They came from Elian and stole the land from us natives, and when they realized the magic didn’t suit them, they did away it, cursing those who cannot live normally without it.
“You’ve heard human plights, you’ve read human books—they’ve brainwashed you. They are physically weak, but they are smart, and you’re falling into their trap.”
I stood there, stunned. Having never heard this side of the argument before. It made me question everything I’d read, seen, heard. Was I somehow indoctrinated as he had said? Had I been on the wrong side all along? Was I still Calamity Debonair, Naïve? My heart thumped in my chest, the soft trickling of the fountain the only sounds as we stood side by side, silent, while I had this revelation.
“I shall give you time to think about it.”
“It’s not necessary,” I said, my voice a little unsteady, uncertain in my new decision.
He glanced at me, curiously, but seeing the resolve in my eyes, nodded once, a new understanding between us. He held his hand out for me to shake and to sign myself into this pact with him. I glanced at it for a second before sliding my hand into his grip. I stepped forward. “I’d say it’d be a pleasure to work with you, Roldan.” I leaned up on my tiptoes to say in his ear, “But you know, the killing thing and all . . . and drat, I’ve almost forgotten—I need to show you the special.”
Before he could question it, I shoved Weston’s blade to the hilt in his stomach.
An angry groan crawled up his throat, coming out like a growl. With my hand still on the blade, I pushed a little deeper for good measure. “My grandmother is a human. All of my past friends, my fellow Sisters. Do you think I would ever subject them all to a mental test that could end their life?”
I took a step back. His breaths came out in a hiss, his light eyes darkening to a black spreading out further than even his irises. I could see the monster he spoke of. His teeth were bared, two incisors sharpening to lethal points.
“Well, well, it seems you are just like your brother, aren’t you . . .?”
Pain flickered across his angry face, before he dropped to his knees.
“What purpose do those teeth serve, I wonder?” I asked absently, not expecting a response.
“Ripping out throats on the battlefield,” he growled, his head bowed as he hesitated in pulling the blade out, before pounding his fist on the floor in anger.
“Lovely,” I muttered.
“I’ll show you firsthand.”
“Hmm. I’ll pass.” He eyed me with disdain, his chest heaving with his breaths. “Speaking of your brother, give his knife back to him, will you? I’m sure he’s a bit cross his choices have been limited.”
When I reached the door, I turned to see he’d pulled the knife out and was sitting on his haunches, the monster relieved to have the thorn out.
I eyed him with feigned remorse. “I’m really sorry about all that,” I said, gesturing to the blood and stuff. “You understand why I had to do it, don’t you?” Leaving the room, I sighed, “Try not to trail any blood in the house!”
Revenge: it tasted more bitter than I’d expected.
City folk from the Northside were trickling into the golden arches of the palace, while some were leaving to walk the streets. Lanterns lit the night, the stars bigger and brighter as if they’d been pulled closer to the land just for the ball.
Untouchables stood in formation around the palace, their dark eyes taking everything in from the slit in the white cloth covering them from head to toe.
The king’s guard clashed with the Untouchables, each of them glancing in the other’s direction with the same look: you don’t belong here.
I leaned against an iron lantern, watching the flock of people flit from here and there while debating if I should go in. The day and my actions were colliding in my head. I vaguely remembered the highlights, but everything else blurred like I’d been in a hazy world created by a dark intoxicant. I wanted to go lock myself in my room until it passed, but I didn’t know when Agnes was returning from her meeting; she’d been gone all day, and I didn’t want her to suspect me of ditching the ball that any girl my age would kill to attend. It was hard enough hiding this darkness—I didn’t want to bring any more attention to myself.
After Roldan left, I had to compel a servant to clean up the blood in the main drawing room, and, the Titan had, in fact, trailed it in the house. I didn’t know if I made the best decision in getting my revenge because once this magic wore off, I vowed never to use it again. When I was alone, it felt as if I was sinking further in each minute. And I knew I couldn’t protect myself as a normal Sister, not from him. Let’s just hope he decided we were even and he’d move on. Though, I couldn’t stop the uncertainty of how far he would go to convince me to open the seal.
A quiet rustle of wings brought my gaze to a nearby lantern, where a crow sat perched on top, his eyes on me. I paused, having an inkling of unease, but I brushed it off when I noticed Maxim walking out of a palace archway, stopping to speak to one of his guards. When he looked up and saw me leaning against a lantern, he observed me with a frown before heading my way.
He stood before me, dressed in a white, short-sleeved jerkin, white pants, and leather boots. My eyes fixated on the silver buttons on his shirt and belt . . . the orange lantern light hit it just right—
“What are you wearing?”
I was sucked out of my trance. It seemed the silver pull was a little stronger while dark. How convenient. His words processed, and I glanced down at myself. “It’s the newest style.”
“Looks like you stole it right off a barmaid.”
It did. It really did. I looked like a cheap working woman. Sunny had gone all out with it, in the worst way.
“Everyone likes barmaids.” I picked a piece of lint off my sleeve.
“That’s because they’re free with their favors, not because of what they wear. Though, now that I think about it, it isn’t so bad,” he added in an amused drawl.
“Go away, Maxim. You’re a traitor, and you’re ruining my quiet.”
“You’re at my palace telling me to go away?”
“It’s not yours, you stole it. And not even in an honorable way,” I said, thinking about how he snuck his men in at night while the king was away.
“What happened to the ‘milords?’ I preferred that.”
“I’m sure you did. Why are you being nice? Aren’t you cross you didn’t get your vote?”
He smiled deliciously—I mean, devilishly. “I got it.”
My eyes narrowed. “How?”
“How did you put it, ‘It’s my business, none of yours?’”
I had a feeling it was very much my business, but I didn’t respond, or we’d talk circles around each other for an hour.
Maxim held his arm out in a silent invitation to walk me in.
I raised a brow. “And make you be seen with a barmaid? How could I tarnish your inflated, self-indulgent reputation?” I put my hand over my heart in concern.
“It’ll survive. I merely do not trust you out here.”
“Even at the risk of touching me after last night?”
His gaze didn’t waver. “I’ve seen a lot in my life. A busty, slightly mad wench doesn’t worry me.”
“No,” I said matter-of-factly. “I im
agine you have a few of those in your harem.”
My gaze caught on two king’s guards trading places with another, and a smile brightened my face. Joining Maxim’s side, I linked my arm in his. “Fine. But we have to go in over there.” I pointed in the direction.
“I can only imagine why,” he said wryly.
As we reached one of the open archways, the two king’s guards straightened, their gazes focusing straight ahead having seen Maxim.
“What a beautiful night, isn’t it?” I stopped to ask.
Steady’s gaze flicked to Maxim and then me, nodding with a hesitant smile. I believed Maxim was his idea of ‘twice his size.’ Tuko, though, he cleared his throat, a real-life blush tinging his cheeks. It brought a laugh out of me.
“What I would do to see it from a roof . . .” I mused.
Steady’s small smile fell, my voice and my statement clicking into place. Tuko, though, he appeared clueless. “It would be beautiful, my lady.”
They were both walking on eggshells, it seemed, in front of the Untouchable Prince who watched the scene with a stoic expression. I thought I would add one parting word, and then save them from themselves.
“Ah, Gregory—” Tuko’s smile fell and shattered like glass, “you’re much more handsome in your formal wear.” I jerked on the lapel of his jerkin. “Quite dashing.”
I felt both of their eyes follow me into the palace, probably in all kinds of turmoil, wondering if the prince knew I was the ‘Girl in Black’ or whatever nonsense they called me.
“You make men nervous,” Maxim said.
I let out a half laugh. “They were more nervous you were there. You’re the one who could kill them with a touch, not me.”
Women in satin flowing gowns, men in jewel-encrusted jerkins and leather boots, from most different regions filled the palace entrance. The open ballroom showed the dark sky, hundreds of tiny stars blinking in the night.
“Refrain from getting into trouble, or I’ll throw you in my dungeon until the ball’s over,” Maxim said seriously.
“I love it when your charm comes out,” I said, my gaze running over the room, and meeting my mother’s inquisitive stare out of all people. She looked between the prince and me with wide eyes.
A Girl in Black and White (Alyria Book 2) Page 14
