by Savina Joyce
Phaedra: Sounds good to me.
Twenty minutes was more than enough time for Phaedra to settle in. This first trimester was more draining than she would have anticipated. She called the Chinese restaurant and order all of her favorites before lying down on the couch for a quick nap. The delivery guy would wake her up when he knocked. She fell asleep in seconds.
The smell of eggrolls stirred Phaedra from her slumber. How had the delivery driver gotten in the house? Did she forget to lock the door? She sat up. Logan took a step back, startled. She hadn’t even seen him to the left of her.
“Are you ok?” he asked.
“When did you get here? I thought you were at work?”
Logan smiled. “We were texting over an hour ago. I called you when I got out, but you didn’t answer. Were you already here when you were texting me?”
“Yes. I thought I would wake up when the food got here.”
Logan laughed. “Nothing short of a grenade would have stirred you from that slumber. The driver was knocking on the door when I got here. I almost sent him away. I thought he was at the wrong place. Lucky for you, I was hungry and had cash on me.”
Logan motioned towards the coffee table. He had laid out all the food Phaedra ordered, buffet style.
“Lucky for both of us,” she replied. “I must have been more tired than I thought. And hungrier.”
“You did order half the menu, but I think we can take care of all of this. I haven’t eaten in hours.”
Phaedra reached for a fork. “I’m willing to try if you are.”
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
LOGAN
When Logan first came home, he was confused. His favorite delivery guy, Ray, was waiting at his door. That confusion was quickly replaced with joy once Ray explained that a woman had called in an order from his place. He practically threw Ray the money in his haste to get inside.
When he got inside, he found Phaedra fast asleep on the couch. Logan loved to watch her sleep. She always had a half smile on her face when she slept. Phaedra didn’t wake up to the sound of Logan calling her name, but she definitely woke up to the smell of food. Just the thought of it made him chuckle. He did his best to make sure that all the food was set up and on display for her on the coffee table before she woke up.
Their conversation came easily as they sampled a little of each of the plates. Somehow Phaedra had managed to pick all of his favorite foods. That was just one of the many things that Logan loved about her.
While they were discussing their respective days at work, Logan remembered her secret phone call with Shelly.
“I doubt that this was all that you and Shelly talked about today.”
Phaedra froze with her fork halfway to her mouth. “What do you mean?”
“From the sound of all the whispering coming from her desk, it sounded like a lot more than a surprise dinner.”
“I can’t have conversations with Shelly?”
“Of course you can. But, based on your reaction, it seems like this particular conversation had something to do with me.”
“If it was something that I wanted to discuss with you, I would have,” Phaedra said, putting her fork down and pushing her plate away.
Logan’s eyes narrowed. “If it’s something about me, I should be the only one that you’re discussing it with.”
“I don’t understand why you’re interrogating me. I came over to have a nice night with you.”
“I was just making conversation. You’re the one who got all uptight about it. Now, I just want to know what’s going on.” Logan slammed his fork on the table hard enough to make Phaedra flinch.
“What is your problem? This isn’t like you.”
“My problem is that you and Shelly don’t normally keep things from me. It isn’t like you. Now all of a sudden there are whispered conversations that I can’t even mention without you accusing me of interrogating you. It’s clear that we can’t move on until everything is out in the open.”
“Like I said, if I was ready to talk about it with you, I would.”
“You’re not ready to talk to me, but you can talk to my secretary? I thought we had something real here.” Logan stood up and began pacing.
Phaedra shrunk back into the couch. “What do you mean we had something real?”
“Don’t twist my words. You know what I meant.”
“I don’t know what you meant. Maybe you should clarify.”
“All of a sudden, my girlfriend doesn’t trust me. Is that clear enough for you?”
“I thought I was your fiancé?”
“Damn it, Phaedra. Just tell me what is going on and stop trying to make this a fight.
“You didn’t need any help to make it a fight. You’re doing just fine on your own. I think I should go.” Phaedra stood and reached for her purse.
Logan got to it first, pulling it just out of her reach. “You’re not going anywhere until you tell me the truth.”
“Logan you can’t keep me here.”
“Tell me what’s going on and you’re free to go.”
“I don’t like ultimatums.”
“Neither do I.”
They stared at each other, both refusing to back down. Logan hadn’t meant to take it this far, but the fact that she was fighting so hard to keep this secret terrified him. He didn’t want to lose her. What if there was someone else?
“If I tell you, I’m leaving. I will turn off my phone the second I walk out of this door. I don’t like to be pressured like this.”
“I don’t like to be kept in the dark.”
Phaedra stared at him with tears filling her eyes. “I’m pregnant.”
Logan’s arms fell to his sides. He felt as if the wind had been knocked out of him. Phaedra grabbed her purse, walked around him, and slammed the door on her way out. By the time Logan called after her, she was already gone.
Logan collapsed back onto the couch. He heard a voice. He realized that he was mumbling to himself. “She’s pregnant. Phaedra’s pregnant. A baby. My baby. I can’t believe it. A father. I’m going to be a father.”
He kept repeating the words. The more he said it, the more foreign it sounded. He was going to be a father. Logan was going to be a father and Phaedra hadn’t even bothered to tell him. She told Shelly instead. He should have been the first to know.
He balled his hand up into a fist.
Who else got to hear his good news? Why hadn’t she come to him? He loved her. Didn’t she want to have his baby? Or, was she callous enough to think that this was no big deal? How could she be so selfish?
Logan called Phaedra three time before he remembered that she said she was turning her phone off. What kind of woman dropped a bombshell like that and disappeared?
Logan looked at the food on the table with disgust. Just a few minutes ago, he had been savoring this meal with the woman he loved. Now, he couldn’t stand to take another bite. He grabbed all the leftovers and quickly shoved them in the fridge before lying back down on the couch.
The cushions still smelled like the rosewater that she used in her hair. He had to find out how long this had been going on. He fell into a restless sleep with Phaedra’s name on his lips.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
PHAEDRA
P haedra managed to make it into the hallway before any tears fell. Once they started, she couldn’t stop. By the time she made it to the elevator, she was sobbing uncontrollably. She hadn’t wanted Logan to find out like this. He had backed her into a corner.
She was scared of his reaction. He hadn’t been violent, but he had been imposing. They had never argued, not really. To see him get so upset like this, over a phone call, was shocking. Phaedra couldn’t imagine how mad he was, now that she was gone. She thought that she heard him call her name, but she couldn’t be sure.
She doubted that Logan would have tried to force her to stay, but didn’t like that he had threatened that. Maybe he was right. She probably should have told him first.
Phaedra was
so grateful that no one else got on the elevator. She didn’t think that she could stand to explain why she was crying or try to hide her tears. By the time she made it to her car, the cries had settled down to mere whimpers. The road home was long and quiet. Phaedra couldn’t even stand to listen to the radio.
She had lied when she told Logan she was turning off her phone. When he started calling, she heard every ring. Though she knew it wasn’t possible, even the ringer sounded angry. Phaedra hoped he wouldn’t keep calling all night. She couldn’t talk to him. Not now. He might cool off eventually. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to stick around and find out.
Phaedra had to get word to Shelly somehow. She didn’t have Shelly’s home phone number. It might not matter anymore. If Logan never spoke to Phaedra again, she might not come in contact with Shelly ever again. Shelly shouldn’t be punished for being Phaedra’s confidant. It wasn’t like Logan to take out his anger on unsuspecting victims, but it also wasn’t like him to treat Phaedra this way.
From everything that Phaedra read in her research, being upset wasn’t good for the baby. She didn’t how to break herself out of this funk. Putting on a fake happy face would probably be even worse. Phaedra was never one to hide her feelings, and she wasn’t about to start now.
When Phaedra arrived home, she couldn’t stop crying. She cried the entire time that she refilled River’s food and water bowls. River watched from the corner of the room, but didn’t make her usual yowling complaints. She tended to give Phaedra space until she went to bed. Only then would River come in and cuddle. Phaedra would definitely need to cuddle tonight.
Phaedra realized she hadn’t thought to bring any Chinese food home with her. Her choices here were dismal. Instead of savory food, she would have no choice but to eat the saddest bowl of cereal ever.
Thinking of Shelly, Phaedra decided she had to warn her. She might not have Shelly’s number, but she did have her email address. She was still too emotional to make a sensible email, so it was short and to the point.
Dear Shelly,
Logan knows. Big fight.
Phaedra
Just seeing the words on the screen started to make her tear up again. Phaedra quickly hit send and shut her laptop. She headed for bed. She pulled off her clothes and crawled under the blankets in her underwear. River settled in beside her, purring to keep her company. Phaedra put her arm around the cat and settled into a troubled sleep.
The next morning, Phaedra woke up and reached out for her phone to see if Logan had called. Her phone was already in her hand before she remembered their fight. When she realized what she was doing, she let her phone drop onto the bed.
Things had gotten out of hand last night. She hadn’t expected Logan to question her. Phaedra definitely hadn’t expected him to fly off the handle like that. That was the reaction she feared the most. Was he really mad that she had kept the baby a secret from him? Or was he mad that a baby even existed?
If he was mad that she was pregnant at all, that would sting much more. Logan had to understand that this was a hard time for her. It was only natural that she would need someone to confide in. She loved Logan, but sometimes the one you love is the last one you feel comfortable talking to. Maybe that was her shortcoming.
Phaedra wanted to call Logan. She needed to make him understand that she had only hidden the news of her pregnancy out of fear. She had told Shelly because Shelly had known Logan for much longer than Phaedra did. Shelly had told Phaedra to tell Logan. She said he would be thrilled. He sure didn’t seem overjoyed last night.
This whole situation was a disaster. Phaedra didn’t know what to do. One thing was for sure, she was glad she didn’t have to work today. Eventually she would have to edit the photos from the maternity shoot, but she had some time.
Phaedra fired up her laptop and saw a new message from Shelly.
Hi Phaedra,
I’m so sorry that the two of you had a fight. I’m sure you’ll get through this. Thanks for the heads up. Logan was hell on wheels when he came in this morning. He still hasn’t spoken to me yet, but I’ve known him for a long time. He’ll be mad at me for a day or so, then he’ll go back to normal. Let me work on him.
The most important thing is that you get some rest today. Meet me for brunch tomorrow morning and we’ll come up with a plan to fix this. I know you’re going to say that you’re not in the mood for brunch, but I don’t want to hear it. We’ll meet at 10:30. Watch for my text with the address.
Take care of yourself,
Shelly
A secret meeting with Shelly might not be the best idea, but who could say no to brunch? Today, she planned to focus on eating whatever she wanted and watching romantic comedies. Sometimes, laughter was the best medicine.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
LOGAN
L ogan was livid. And hurt. He went into work with a big chip on his shoulder. He tried to take out his frustration by being passive aggressive with Shelly, but she wouldn’t allow it. The more surly he got, the more cheerful she became. It was downright frustrating. Logan went into his office and shut the door. Shelly began aggressively humming villain theme songs at her desk.
He could barely focus on his work. Logan knew he couldn’t ignore Phaedra forever. He didn’t want to. When things were tough in Logan’s life, Phaedra was the one he turned to. He used to think he filled that gap for her, too. He saw now just how wrong he had been.
Thinking about it now, he could see why she would talk to Shelly. He found Shelly easy to talk to himself. She was smart and nurturing. She always knew the right things to say to set people at ease. Logan didn’t have an issue with Phaedra talking to Shelly as much as he did with Phaedra not telling him. He felt like he was missing out.
Logan wished he had been there from the start. He imagined them sitting on the edge of the tub, fingers crossed, waiting to see if the test said they were pregnant. The thought struck him that Phaedra might not be excited about the baby. Maybe that was why she hadn’t told him.
What if Phaedra didn’t want to keep the baby?
Logan thought that his heart was broken the night before, but the thought of Phaedra giving away their child was giving him physical pain. He pushed his chair away from his desk. Logan couldn’t sit there with this weighing on him so heavily. He walked over to the window and looked out over the city.
If Phaedra didn’t want to keep his baby, there was definitely no hope for their relationship. Logan loved her, but he had always wanted a family. He wouldn’t let anyone, including Phaedra, take that away from him. If Logan had to raise their baby on his own, so be it.
He realized that he might be getting ahead of himself, but he had to have a plan. Logan liked to have all his bases covered when it came to mentally preparing for an outcome. He briefly considered talking to Shelly too, but she was already too mixed up in this. Plus, he was still mad at her.
The door to his office burst open. Before he could protest, he saw a platter of food. He frowned. Shelly was not going to win him over with lunch. Not this time.
“I would love to partake in your little apology lunch, but I have an appointment,” Logan said.
“No. You don’t. I make your appointments. Have a seat. This isn’t an apology. This is a reckoning.”
“Is that so?”
“It is. I know that you’re my boss. However, I also know that you value my opinion and right now you need to hear it.”
“I would like to keep my personal life out of our business dealings.”
“I’m sure you would, but since you’re mad at me about something personal, that is off the table.”
“Listen, Shel—”
“I am not and I will not. I don’t know what happened with you and Phaedra. All I know is that you are upset and hurt.”
“I am. I have every right to be.”
“You do. But it obviously never occurred to you that she is scared.”
“Scared? Why would she be scared?”
“I don’t know.
Maybe you should ask her.”
“Maybe I will.”
“Good. Now that we have that out of the way, let’s eat.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
PHAEDRA
P haedra reluctantly headed into the restaurant to meet Shelly for lunch. Shelly meant well, but Phaedra wasn’t sure that there was anything they could do to fix her Logan problem. Either way, a woman had to eat. There weren’t many better places to start than brunch.
Shelly was already waiting at the table with a plate of fresh fruit. Her face lit up when she saw Phaedra. She rose from the table and rushed to wrap her in a warm hug.
“I’m so glad you came. Come. Sit. You can order whatever you like. My treat,” Shelly said.
“You know I think you’re great, Shelly. It was just the topic of today’s visit that was the issue.”
“I know it’s a tough point right now, but it will all work out. Let’s order food before we get into the heavy lifting.”
“Food sounds good.”
Phaedra grabbed a piece of cantaloupe off the plate and absentmindedly munched on it as she perused the menu. Everything on the menu sounded delicious, so she ordered a dish that had a touch of everything. She ordered two strips of bacon, two sausage links, two scrambled eggs with cheese, two pancakes, a side order of hash browns, and some juice to wash it all down,
Shelly looked at her with raised eyebrows. “Hungry, are we?”
“I need my strength during these trying times.”
Shelly laughed. “You’ll get a lot of strength from that. It looks like you’re preparing for war.”
“The song does say that love is a battlefield.”
Shelly laughed loud enough to draw looks from the neighboring tables.
The women ate happily together, making small talk about the food. Phaedra ate every morsel on her plate and finished the fruit plate, too. Shelly grinned. Phaedra was definitely embracing eating for two.
