“This is ridiculous. We’re grown men, and you goddamn left her.” Colt and Russ had never had an all-out fight over anything. They were both fairly easy to get along with, but Colt itched to ball up his hand into a fist and slug the hell out of his brother.
“Are you?”
The goading tone didn’t help matters. “No, Russ, I’m not. I’m not afraid she’ll choose you over me.”
“I was here first.”
“You know what? Go for it. You want her back, you go ahead and try.”
“Not much of a challenge there. You don’t give up like that, Colt.”
“No, I don’t, and I didn’t say I was giving up now. Why are you spoiling for a fight? Do you want to hit me? Will that make you feel better? ‘Cause it would sure make me feel better to clock you. I said go for it. It’s up to Chrissie, not us. I’ve been honest with you. What more do you want?”
“You never told me why you called.”
Colt scoffed at the switch of topic and tone of voice. “Nice change of subject. I wanted to see you before I flew home. I have a meeting before I head back to Atlanta. Thought we could have lunch and catch up.”
“Sorry man.” Russ seemed to lose some of his puffed up attitude. “I… Seeing Christina here completely threw me. I was not expecting that. I’ve never liked surprises. And no, you’re right. I’d have loved to spend the time catching up rather than baiting you because I was the dumb-ass. I can admit it.”
“We’re brothers, and under the circumstances, I can’t see how’d I’d have reacted any different. Between our work schedules and you avoiding the family since December, I thought if I was in town, you’d find a few minutes to see me.”
Russ looked at his watch. “I know. Look, I’ve got to go. I have to stop by my office before my meeting. When are you coming back to town?”
“In a week or two, maybe.” For all he knew, he’d have to wait a few more months. Chrissie might not want to see him again for a while. She might not want to see him again ever. The idea of that made his stomach hurt. He didn’t know if he should call her, and he didn’t think showing up at her job was the best thing either. He could delay his flight home until she got off work, but then maybe she needed some time.
Fuck, he didn’t know what to do.
“Y’all didn’t set it up?”
“No. We hadn’t set anything up.”
“I can’t believe you have the hots for my fi…ex-fiancée,” Russ corrected at the end. His smile was rueful, and Colt was more confused by the minute. He stood and slid his hands in his pockets and walked toward his brother. They were two strong, capable businessmen, stubborn, and pains in the ass, but even Russ seemed a little confused and at a loss. Two men, one woman. He was pretty sure this wasn’t how the fantasy was supposed to go for most women.
If Russ wasn’t over her, Colt wondered what either of them would do. Would he give up or would Russ? Would they make her choose or would one man be the better of the two and bow out?
At the same time, he wondered about Chrissie. He wondered if she was the forgiving kind. She had a big heart, tender, but when she was wronged, as she’d been by Russ…?
“Is that a bad thing, Russ? You don’t seem to know how you feel about it. I want her. I’m not ashamed of that fact. You dropped the ball. I picked it up and ran with it. I don’t intend to give her up unless she isn’t interested.”
“Not even if I wanted her back?”
“Not even then. You had your chance, and you blew it.” Colt meant every word he was saying. He was the fun loving, easygoing guy everyone loved and trusted. He didn’t get into arguments with people as a general rule. He solved issues, problems, but the one issue he hadn’t been able to fix was Chrissie’s wounded heart. Time did that. All he wanted was to make sure such a thing never happened again.
“I did. But I don’t want her back. I… She’s not even your type.” Russ studied him, and Colt stood up against the scrutiny. “Then again, maybe your type has been wrong all these years.”
“I know.” She was pretty and simple and down-to-earth and took what she wanted, which in those magical moments, had been him.
Russ studied him, and Colt stood up against the scrutiny. “Then again, maybe your type has been wrong all these years.” And she was different from most women he dated. She was pretty and simple and down-to-earth and took what she wanted, which in those magical moments had been him.
“Maybe so. She’s a unique woman, and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her since the day I met her. But Russ, you’ve got to believe that I never hoped that this would happen.”
“Never?”
“Never. Not until she was free, that is. I never wanted anything more than your and her happiness, though.”
“Even if that meant she and I got married and lived happily ever after?”
“Even then.”
“In the end, you’re always the better brother and the better man. You know that, right?”
“It’s a tough burden, but I try my best.” Russ laughed at Colt’s words, and Colt was glad that he could do that for his brother, that he could ease the tension between them with a bit of humor. “You take care of yourself. Next time I’m in town, I’ll call you.”
“Deal. There actually isn’t a better man for her,” Russ offered as he walked toward the door.
“Thank you.”
“Just… It’s not a fling, right?”
“No. It’s something far different than a fling.” At the door, Colt pulled Russ in for a hug. “I’ve missed you, Russ. It’s been too long.”
“I know.”
Colt clapped his brother on the back as they parted. “It was good to see you.”
“Colt, I…I know you won’t, and I know you don’t need the warning, but don’t do to her what I did.”
“Not a chance. Unlike you, I want the relationship and commitment.”
“I know.”
“Can I ask though, why? Why did you do it?” Colt had wanted to know for months but hadn’t wanted to call Russ on the phone and ask. It needed to be done in person.
“I don’t have an answer to give you. I didn’t have one for Christina either. After I left the rehearsal dinner, turning her over to her family, I knew right then that I wouldn’t be meeting her at the church. I knew I wouldn’t be marrying her. I couldn’t bring myself to go back in the house and tell her though.”
“But Vegas?”
“I didn’t even home to pack. I went straight to the airport and bought a ticket to the one place I could think of. Sin City. I wanted to get lost and get drunk and forget what I was doing to a wonderful woman. I have no answer for you, nothing that’s going to make it better or make you understand. I only knew I couldn’t do it, that it wasn’t right. Knowing that seemed to make the wrong of running away not seem as bad as saving us both from a life we’d have been miserable living in the long run.”
“Thank you,” Colt said solemnly. You’re right. It really isn’t an answer, but thank you for trying to give me one.”
“You don’t need my blessing, but you’ve got it anyway. She is a special woman, just not in ways that I could appreciate. I’ve never turned away from anything before. No challenge was too big for me to take on. Marrying her would have been the first. I hope she can forgive me one day. Take care, bro.”
Russ’s parting words rang in Colt’s ears long after Russ closed the door behind himself.
Chapter Eight
The small handguns, boxes of ammunition, and gleaming silver-tipped arrows winked up at her as she lowered her head to the glass-topped counter. Ten more minutes and she could go home. She could shower and take a nap and forget the look of disbelief on Russ’s face when she opened the door to the hotel room belonging to his brother.
She didn’t have to work again until tomorrow night. That was just fine with her. The day had been a long one. Standing on her feet all day after being on her back all night… Though she’d take the tired after a night like that an
y time.
“If you drool on the counter, you have to clean it up.”
Chrissie looked up to see James, one of the sales associates in her department, standing in front of her. “No. You would be cleaning it up. I’m the boss, remember?” Not that she liked pulling the boss card. It was a rare thing for her, but the day just hadn’t gone all that great, and she didn’t want to be around anyone anymore.
She wanted to go home and crawl under the covers. Her body ached in many different places. Her clit hurt when she moved a certain way or bent another way, making the seam of her jeans rub against it. But it wasn’t the way Colt had rubbed it and teased it and made it feel so good.
“You look like you had a rough night.”
“No. I had a great night,” she corrected before she caught herself. The heat in her cheeks was immediate. “This morning was the rough part.”
“Hangover?”
Easy answer. “Something like that.” Difficult answer. No, it wasn’t a hangover. Not in the alcohol way. It was more or less a man hangover. Not the kind she had back in December, though. This was sort of a good man hangover. Only Russ had shown up at the door, all her good feelings had plummeted, and she’d dragged them out of the room, down the hall, and into the elevator behind her.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like this.”
“I don’t remember the last time I’ve been like this.” But she couldn’t wait to feel it again. She had the distinct notion that Colt was going to be a distraction, and all she could think about was letting him become one, allowing him to overload her senses with conversation and really hot sex. She’d built herself a good life these last months, and while she hadn’t been looking for involvement with anyone, being with Colt had felt incredible and so…right. Had it not been for Russ showing up, she might have even turned her car around on the way to work and called in sick.
“You can go on home,” James offered. “I can relay any important info to the next shift. I don’t mind.”
“I’m supposed to tell you that, James.”
“Maybe.” He shrugged. “I was just trying to help.”
“And win a few brownie points? I know how you operate.” James was one of the most diligent workers. He did everything asked of him and even more when he was trying to get in her good graces so he could sneak out early or take a busy weekend off to be a college kid and party for a few days. “I appreciate it, and I do believe I’ll take you up on the offer.” This was so uncharacteristic for her. She didn’t shirk her responsibilities, and while she may have nothing more than a job in a store that was primarily meant for men, in a department definitely primarily meant for men, she loved her job. She was exhausted, though. She hadn’t had sex like that in years and maybe not even then.
Her body ached, her head ached, her heart ached. That was the one thing confusing her. Why should her heart ache if she was over Russ?
She made it out of the store without anyone taking notice or trying to stop her for chitchat. Being able to talk was one very important prerequisite for working in retail, and many of the employees took that job requirement to heart. Normally, she didn’t mind and had even come to enjoy it. Today would not have been one of those days.
Several miles down the road, in the opposite direction of historic downtown and Colt’s hotel, she stopped for a chocolate milk shake at the Sonic Drive-In near the interstate, then headed out under the overpass toward home.
Windows in her pickup rolled down, and her stereo blaring with the latest Miranda Lambert album, Chrissie couldn’t wait to spend a little time alone. She needed some space, some time to think. It would probably be a good idea to call Colt, to let him know that she was all right, but after months of depending on herself in a time of need…
Calling her mother was out of the question too. She’d have expected Chrissie to smile and ask how Russ was doing instead of running down the hall like her ass was on fire. She’d have expected Chrissie to wish him all the happiness in the world and for her knees not to shake and her palms not to sweat.
Chrissie’s mother was the soul of genteel Southern upbringing, and though she’d tried to raise her only daughter to be the same, the lessons just hadn’t taken.
Lost in thought as she was, sucking down the sweet, thick chocolate ice cream, and singing along to the songs, her house seemed to appear out of nowhere. It wasn’t good to drive by rote on the curvy country roads, but she had a hard time keeping herself focused. Luckily, she was between schools letting out and people getting off work, so traffic was light. The biggest hazard she might have come up against was a squirrel or two.
The vase of flowers on the front porch surprised her, but the man who pulled up and parked behind her before she was out of her car was the shock.
“Russ?” To say she was caught unawares would not be much of an understatement. She hadn’t noticed him or anyone following her, a testament to just how deep inside her own head she was. “Twice in one day. Dare I ask why?”
He smiled that charming smile she once knew so well, and as he came close, she could see the uncertainty lurking in his eyes. She felt nothing. Not the old twinge of anticipation. Not the thrill she used to get when he’d show up unannounced. Not a thing. Well, okay, some sadness perhaps, a bit of regret. But even those were in very small amounts.
How could seeing someone she once loved and was prepared to marry make her feel nothing?
Whereas his brother Colt made her feel something. Something deep and wonderful. He made her feel…everything. All at once. She could be herself with him and she never tried to impress him, like she’d done with Russ. Colt had seen her at her worst, and he’d seen her at her best. Everything else was the gravy in between.
“Nice roses.”
“They…” She nodded. “They are. Thank you.”
“My brother?”
“Probably.” She edged around him and headed toward the house, the vase of flowers in her hand. “What are you doing here?” she asked as she walked.
“I honestly don’t know. After this morning, I wanted to see you, talk to you. I wanted to see if…” He pursed his lips and looked away, out toward the trees at the edge of the property.
She didn’t need him to finish his thought. “After all these months?” Chrissie unlocked the door and stepped inside. Russ followed her, taking one tentative step after another.
She was attuned to uncertainty and wariness. She’d been hunting. She knew what it was to walk through the woods and not make a sound. She knew what it was to smell another hunter’s scent and not want to encroach on his territory. Russ had it written all over him in the way he moved, careful and cautious. Maybe he thought she would shoot him…
She set the vase in the kitchen window. The red, yellow, and orange-colored roses lit the room up in a way that was different than simply the sun shining in. They were brilliant and so full of life. She loved them immediately. She loved that Colt thought enough of her to send them, and even though there was no card, she knew in her gut they were from him. She loved him for it, for the night before, for the morning tease, for wanting her.
She loved him.
“When I saw you this morning with Colt, I… Christina, please look at me.”
He was the only person other than her mother who’d ever called her Christina. She was sure that should have told her something a long time ago, only it wasn’t until now that she’d realized it.
Then again, she’d just put it together that she was in love with her ex’s brother. She turned to Russ with that sentiment front and center in her brain. She didn’t know how to look at Russ and not wince at the mere idea that Colt meant more to her than just a one-night thing. But then, how could she love him? She’d spent one night with him, sharing stories and making love. They hadn’t even talked for any length of time before that, unless she counted the day after when he came to check on her. Then there was his admission that he’d been calling her father every once in a while to make sure she was all right. Those thi
ngs touched her in ways nothing ever had with Russ. He really had done her a favor by skipping out on her.
Someone—Colt—cared about her. Just her. Not money. Not connections. Not for whatever reason Russ might have thought he cared about her.
Colt didn’t have to do any of the things he’d done, however small and insignificant they may seem to others. To her, they were everything.
Maybe she had meant that she should have married him instead. Maybe she had meant, been admitting without actually saying the words out loud, that Russ had never been the right man for her.
Romance between them hadn’t been instantaneous or earth-shattering. They’d seemed to fit and liked each other well enough, spent time together, and love grew into it, only… Was it really love?
Her mother would have said that whatever it was, love or not, was better than what most people had ever found with someone else. Would Chrissie have really believed that? Would Russ?
If so and if they had married, somewhere down the road…
“Christina?”
“What?” She shook herself out of her thoughts. “Sorry. What did you want to say?”
“My brother seems to have worn you out.” He said it with a small smile, and there was no hint of malice in his eyes or his tone of voice. Chrissie knew she should have felt bad, but she didn’t. Russ made his choice. Colt had made his. And now it was her turn to make hers.
“Yes, he did.”
“Good.” He shifted his stance but he didn’t look away from her. “I want to apologize. No, that’s not right. I need to apologize for what happened.”
“You mean, leaving me at the altar?”
“Yes.” He drew himself up. “For leaving you at the altar.”
“It was a bit Cowardly Lion, Russ. For a man who can talk to courtrooms full of people, become best pals with attendees at a party, you were cowardly in how you handled me.” She wasn’t interested in embarrassing him or humiliating him or making him feel any worse that he had probably already felt. It was about moving forward and cleaning the slate, so to speak.
“You’re right, it was,” he admitted. “I can’t explain. I tried, with Colt this morning, but I—“
Keep It Together Page 9
