Every Picture Tells A Fury (Federal Bureau of Magic Cozy Mystery Book 8)

by Annabel Chase

  The wizard gathered up the remnants of the locator spell. “I’ll fetch the Lawsonia inermis and be back in a jiffy.”

  “Do me a favor and have a latte waiting for me when I reappear.” I paused. “On second thought, make it a full bottle of tequila.”

  “As you wish, O brave one.” He stopped at the door and observed me expectantly.

  “What?”

  “You know what,” he said.

  I heaved a weary sigh. “It’s fury time.”

  “A bit louder for the people in the back.”

  I shot him an exasperated look. “There are no people in the back.” Not yet anyway.

  “Then once more, with feeling.”

  I straightened my shoulders and mustered my best superhero voice. “It’s fury time.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chief Fox arrived at the gallery not long after Neville’s departure. He rubbed his jawline, drawing my attention to the dimple in his chin. Why on earth was a dent in the skin so incredibly sexy? It made no sense.

  “When you say Jumanji,” the chief began, “do you mean the new version or the original?”

  “Both. They get sucked into the board game in the original and the computer game in the new version.”

  “Right.” He studied the canvas. “I don’t like this, Eden. The painting is pretty bleak. Maybe I should go with you.”

  “I appreciate your concern, but you’re human, Sawyer. You’re equipped for many things.” My cheeks grew hot. “Many impressive feats, in fact. But portal magic isn’t one of them.”

  He exhaled. “I’m waiting right here until you come back. I don’t care how long it takes.”

  “Time won’t work the same way in the painting,” I explained. “It might seem like five minutes out here and be five hours in there.” I paused. “Or vice versa.”

  His whole body tensed. “I don’t care if it’s five years. I’m not going anywhere, Eden.”

  My hand cupped his cheek. “You might need the bathroom once or twice.”

  He brought my palm to his lips and kissed it. “Seriously, if you don’t come out in a reasonable time, I’m sending every member of your family in after you.”

  I didn’t bother to tell him that they’d likely refuse. I pushed onto my toes and brushed my lips against his. “I’ll be thinking about you the whole time.”

  “Don’t think about me. Think about yourself. I want you to taste my puppy chow.”

  I burst into laughter. “If you feel that strongly about it.”

  He chuckled nervously. “I’ve been thinking about it ever since it came up. I have my mom’s recipe. I could make it for you. For us.”

  Tears pricked my eyes. Sawyer Fox wanted to make dessert for me. “I would love that.” I didn’t care if it tasted like actual dog food, I would eat every bite and smile after swallowing.

  He pulled me closer and kissed me with such intensity that my knees buckled. It was the kind of kiss Future Me would savor in the moments before I would fall asleep. Or when I wanted to escape unpleasant thoughts. The kind I’d remember for the rest of my eternal life.

  “Come back to me, Eden,” he whispered.

  Helena burst into the gallery. “I’m here! Don’t start without me! I would’ve been here sooner, but I got waylaid by your mom. She wanted me to tell her which dress looked better and yada yada.” She paused for breath, doubled over from the physical exertion. “She ended up trying on three dresses before I was allowed to leave.”

  If she’d seen me kiss the chief, she gave no indication.

  “I appreciate your enthusiasm, but there’s nothing you can do. The LeRoux witches are on the way.”

  Helena grimaced. “You’re involving the LeRoux witches? Can’t you just siphon their magic to get inside instead of actually involving them?”

  “It’s better this way,” I said. I didn’t feel like explaining the repercussions—the possibility of being too weak once I was inside the painting and a potential new fury trait later. Helena didn’t truly understand my resistance to my nature.

  “Let me come with you,” she said. “I have experience with altered perceptions, which is basically what this will be like for you. I’ll be an asset.”

  “She makes a good point,” the chief said. It was clear he’d be happier if I didn’t go alone.

  “Okay,” I relented.

  Helena fist-bumped me. “It’ll be like old times.” She cast a sidelong glance at the chief. “You’re the sentry, huh?”

  “I’ll protect this painting like it contains the keys to Heaven,” he said.

  I felt his fingers lightly brush against mine and my body relaxed in response.

  The door swung open again and the LeRoux witches marched into the gallery, followed by Neville.

  “Look who it is,” Rosalie said, her eyes on Helena. “I heard you were in town, but I didn’t believe it. Not enough reports of trouble.”

  Helena ignored her. “I’m going to enter the magical plane with Eden.”

  Adele shot me a quizzical look. “Is that necessary?”

  I knew what she was really asking—did I trust my cousin? “Yes,” I said firmly. “Helena can help me navigate a plane like this. It’s likely to be creative chaos.”

  “As close to a hallucination as you can get,” Helena added.

  Adele set her tote bag on the floor. “Very well then, my dears. Let’s begin. Rosalie, Corinne, you know what to do.”

  Neville thrust a jar at the lead witch. “I brought the missing ingredient.”

  “Thank you, Neville.” Adele took the jar and added it to their collection of materials.

  “Can I be of assistance?” the wizard asked. “I’d love to participate and soak up a bit of coven knowledge.”

  “It isn’t like you’ll earn a portal badge, magical Boy Scout,” Rosalie said.

  “I think it’s a wonderful idea,” Adele said. She turned to address Chief Fox. “And I suppose this will be a new experience for you as well.”

  The chief held up his hands. “I’m only here as an observer and to make sure everyone returns safely.”

  Corinne smiled as she placed tall white candles in a large circle around the canvas, which had been moved to the middle of the floor. “You might want to stand back, Chief. Wouldn’t want to set fire to your uniform.”

  “Yes, polyester is highly flammable,” Rosalie added.

  The chief observed in silence as the witches created their magic circle with a combination of candles, chalk, and salt.

  Helena and I moved to the center of the circle and the other supernaturals joined hands around us.

  “You two should hold hands, too, until it’s time to jump,” Adele instructed. “You’ll hear us say forēs aperīre, which means ‘to open the doors.’ When you hear forēs intrāre, that’s your cue.”

  Helena clasped my hands and nerves collected in the pit of my stomach.

  “You ready, cousin?” she asked with a smile. Helena was—had always been—fearless.

  I wasn’t, but I knew it was now or never. Nari’s life depended on it.

  “You remember the magic words to use when you’re ready to exit?” Corinne asked.

  Helena and I nodded and the others began to chant. The air shifted with such force that the flames were nearly extinguished.

  “Forēs intrāre,” they said in unison.

  The sound of my heart thundered in my ears. I turned and launched myself headfirst into the painting.

  The world was dark and silent for about five seconds and I felt like I was submerged in the deepest, darkest part of the ocean where I could neither see nor hear. Finally my senses cleared and I saw that a grey mist surrounded me, like a raincloud or a dust storm. I reached out to touch it and see whether it was real or a figment of my imagination.

  “It’s as real as you are.” Helena’s voice took me by surprise and I released the breath I’d been holding.

  I surveyed our surroundings. Like the painting, they were unformed. Amorphous. Most
ly streaks of black, grey, dark blue, and a ribbon of red, which made think of the red paint that had spilled on the floor.

  “I feel like we’re standing in the middle of twilight itself,” I said.

  “I know what you mean. The silence and stillness of this place…It’s eerie.”

  “How do we find her in all this nothingness?”

  Helena wiggled her eyebrows. “This is where I earn my paycheck.”

  I gave her a pointed look. “You know the FBM isn’t actually paying you for this, right? This was strictly a volunteer situation.”

  “Not even a stipend? I’m pretty skint.”

  “Have you seen my office? The FBM is like the supernatural version of Scrooge.”

  “I’m kidding. It’s fine. The FBM won’t want to put me on their payroll anyway. Not with my history.”

  “Agent Redmond won’t pursue you. He trusts me.”

  Helena glanced around us. “We should walk.”

  “Walk where? We’re nowhere.”

  “Movement might trigger more imagery.” She took my hand and we walked forward at the same pace. Just as she predicted, the colors swirled and changed around us.

  “Is this the inside of Nari’s head?” I asked.

  “Not quite. It’s the plane of her imagination as it exists within this painting.”

  “Oh, well. That’s as clear as mud.”

  Helena laughed. “Aren’t you glad you let me tag along?”

  As we pushed our way through the gloaming, I felt a prickling sensation along the back of my neck. “Someone’s here.”

  A silhouette cut through the mist. She was too tall to be Nari. I tensed in anticipation as the unfamiliar figure came closer. She was a slender young woman with dark hair cut bluntly, just above her shoulders.

  Helena gasped. “Marcie?”

  The young woman burst into tears at the sight of us. Helena rushed forward and engulfed the demon in her arms.

  “Merciful gods,” Marcie said. “I was worried I’d be stuck here forever.”

  “Are you here alone?” I asked.

  She shook her head, sniffling. “Nari is with me.”

  Relief flooded my system at the mention of the artist.

  “Marcie, this is my cousin, Eden. She’s a fury.”

  Marcie’s eyes widened and she peeked at me over Helena’s shoulder. “A real fury?”

  “That’s right,” Helena said, “but she’s self-loathing, so don’t expect her to get excited about it. Eden’s the one I told you about that can help you.”

  Marcie recoiled. “You’re the FBM agent?”

  “That’s right,” I said.

  Marcie pushed her way behind Helena. “Please don’t send me to Otherworld. I swear I’m working on my skills. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone.”

  I wanted to believe her, but I needed more information first. “What happened with Nari? How did you both end up in here?”

  Marcie drew a shaky breath. “Nari seemed so nice and inspiring last night at the exhibit, and I was feeling better after talking to you, Helena.”

  Helena placed a comforting arm on her back. “Marcie, I hate to tell you this, but the exhibit was days ago, not last night.”

  She blinked in disbelief. “Really? It feels like I’ve been here a long time, but I thought that was just because this place is so miserable. Anyway, I went back to the gallery earlier—or I guess it was the day after the exhibit—to see if Nari would give me a job. I didn’t want to keep turning up at events for free food.” Marcie met my gaze. “I’m not a freeloader.”

  Helena patted her shoulder. “It’s okay, Marcie. Eden’s not judging you. She’s a freeloader too.”

  “Hey,” I objected.

  “When I got to the gallery, Nari was painting. She said the muse struck and she couldn’t ignore it.” Marcie pressed her lips together as she tried to keep her emotions in check. “I moved closer to talk to her about working at the gallery and I accidentally knocked into the tray of paints. Some of it splashed on her.”

  Helena gave Marcie’s arm a reassuring squeeze. “It’s okay, Marcie. Whatever happened, it was an accident.”

  “You should’ve seen her. Her whole body seized. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head and everything. It was freaky. She dropped the paintbrush and I tried to catch it before it hit the floor, but I missed. Some of the paint splattered on me and the next thing I know, we’re both in here.” She spread her arms wide.

  “How long did it take you to figure out where you were?” I asked.

  “Not long. When you inspire hallucinations as part of your nature, you figure this kind of thing out pretty quickly. Nari was in bad shape though. Her mind couldn’t seem to comprehend what had happened to us.” Marcie started to cry again. “She curled up in the fetal position and just moaned. It was terrible.”

  Helena wiped away a stray tear. “Then what happened?”

  Marcie sniffled. “I knew I had to help her somehow. Ease her suffering until I could figure out a way out of here.”

  Helena flinched. “Help her how? What did you do?”

  “I thought she was going to lose her mind, like truly lose it.” Marcie swallowed a gulp of air. “So I used my powers to make her hallucinate.”

  “Hallucinate what?” I surveyed the surreal scene around us, which was already an altered state.

  “I had her hallucinate that she was in her art studio and altered her perception of time so that she wouldn’t be too scarred by the experience.” Marcie’s eyes glowed with hope. “I figured that it would help her cope while we were stuck here so she didn’t have a complete breakdown.”

  Helena threw her arms around the young woman and pulled her close. “Marcie, that was genius.”

  “It was?” Marcie closed her eyes and tears streamed down her cheeks.

  “That was good thinking,” I agreed. I knew in my heart that Helena had nothing to do with any of the comas or Nari’s disappearance and I was so relieved that Marcie’s presence confirmed her story. It would be much easier to convince the agency now.

  “I’ve been trying to find an exit, but there doesn’t seem to be one,” Marcie said.

  “Where’s Nari now?” I asked.

  “I’ll show you.” Marcie rubbed the moisture from her eyes. “I kept her somewhere safe in case…”

  Something in her expression gave me pause. “In case what?”

  “Before I used my powers on her, I told her where I thought we were. That’s when she dropped into the fetal position. She told me that this painting was inspired by her negative emotions,” Marcie said. “A place where she intended to pour all her bad thoughts and feelings. And that’s what this place is like. A living embodiment of a bad mood. Everything will be calm for a bit and then a black cloud descends.” She shuddered. “And I’ll just feel this overwhelming sense of despair. It’s made it harder to find a way out because I end up getting influenced by the environment and want to give up until the mood passes.”

  “I guess her muse was grumpy,” Helena said.

  “Or hungover,” I added. “Listen, Marcie. We need you to bring us to Nari so we can all get out of here.”

  Marcie’s eyes sparkled with excitement. “You know how to leave?”

  “That’s why we’re here,” Helena said. “We came to rescue you.”

  “We have an exit strategy,” I confirmed. “A team of witches are in the gallery, waiting to pull us through.”

  “How will they know when to pull us out?” Marcie asked.

  “We use the magic words,” I said. “Peanut butter and pickles.”

  “Those are your magic words?” Marcie asked. “Sounds more like a craving. And now I’m hungry.” She hugged Helena again. “I can’t thank you enough.”

  “Thank us when we’re back safe,” Helena said.

  “Let me take you to Nari before the really bad mood hits.” Marcie looped her arm though Helena’s and guided us through the mist.

  We found Nari curled into a ball on a patch of g
round that appeared to be made of black sand.

  “Should I carry her?” Marcie asked.

  “You should wake her,” I said. “I think we all need to say the magic words together. I don’t want to risk the three of us getting out and leaving Nari behind.”

  “Gods, no,” Marcie breathed. She crouched down and placed both hands on Nari’s head, closing her eyes as she focused.

  Nari’s eyes fluttered open. “Where am I?”

  I extended a hand. “We’ll explain in a few minutes. Can you stand?”

  Nari took my hand and I helped her to her feet. “I feel so disoriented.”

  “Hopefully you’ll feel better in a few minutes. Just follow my lead. Everybody join hands,” I said. We stood in a small circle holding hands. “On the count of three, I need everyone to say ‘peanut butter and pickles.’ Ready?” Their heads bobbed in unison. “One…two…three.”

  “Peanut butter and pickles,” we said as one.

  I waited expectantly, but nothing happened.

  Marcie frowned. “I thought those were the magic words.”

  “They are,” I said. “Let’s try again. Maybe we weren’t as in sync as I thought.”

  We reformed the circle and tried again. Nothing happened.

  “This is a nightmare,” Marcie said. “It’s like I’m being punished for all the accidental hallucinations I’ve caused.”

  Nari glanced at her. “Excuse me?”

  “Don’t worry, Nari,” I interjected. “Marcie isn’t talking about this.”

  The mist grew denser and darker and I felt a strong sense of foreboding. The foul mood was coming; I knew it the way farm animals sensed impending rain.

  “We’re never getting out of here,” Nari said. Her face drained of color. “I don’t even know where I am. I thought I was in my gallery.”

  Helena seemed baffled. “What’s Plan B, Eden?”

  I hadn’t bothered to make one. I figured the LeRoux witches would be able to handle the exit. Lesson learned.

  A dark cloud formed above our heads and slowly began to lower. I felt the weight of it, pushing on my mood, trying to make me submit to its misery.

  “We’re not giving up,” I said firmly. “Did Dorothy give up when the hot air balloon left without her? No. She found another way. She sang songs, clicked those heels, and made it happen.”