He let out a sigh and met my eyes again. “You’re one beautiful bitch.” He said in a near whisper.
I gasped shocked and I could feel the heat from my blush on my cheeks. “Thank you.”
He climbed on top of me and kissed me again. He lined himself up and I felt myself grow wetter in anticipation. Instead of slamming into me like I’d expected, he took his time entering me until he was to the hilt. When he was settled, he looked into my eyes. “This ok?” he asked. I frowned at his question and he sighed. “You know… the baby.”
I mentally slapped myself. Of course that’s why he was being gentle he was afraid of hurting the baby. “Yes, it’s fine. It’s safe to have sex when you’re pregnant.” I said reassuring him. Of course I’d looked it up while in Cayuga during one of my weaker moments.
He maintained a slow steady rhythm with deep powerful strokes. My orgasm snuck up on me out of nowhere. One minute I was building the next I was practically pushed off the edge. I was falling before I even knew I was at the peak.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck…” Lucifer chanted as I clenched around him. “You feel so fucking good babe.” He said before slamming his mouth down on me. I felt like I was floating and had to grip onto his shoulders to make sure I didn’t start levitating. He picked up his pace just a bit and my body was still too sensitive from the last release. It took nothing to bring me back up. “I’m going to cum, cum with me babe.” He whispered in my ear and I immediately went off. I could feel his release flooding me as his body relaxed and we both gasped frantically for air.
When his breathing became somewhat normal, he pulled out of me and rolled onto the bed landing unceremoniously on his back. He put his arm over his eyes and let out a large sigh. “Now that I’ve fucked the anger out of my system we got shit to talk about…” he began.
My head swung his way and I watched him warily. When I didn’t respond he moved his arm a fraction and looked over at me. I tried to scoot away in the other direction hoping to avoid it but he was too fast. His arm shot out and gripped mine and he dragged me across the bed until my upper body was against his. His arm wrapped around me effectively caging me into him. I placed my chin on his chest and looked up at him. He adjusted himself so that the arm previously across his face was behind his head propping his head up so he could look down at me.
“So, why’d you fucking slap me?” he asked arching an eyebrow.
I shrugged innocently. “Because you made me angry?”
He rolled his eyes. “When don’t I? Don’t get me wrong, it turned me the fuck on but it also made me fucking pissed. You can’t go around slapping the shit out of me. Everyone in the room thought I was going to take your fucking head off. I had to remember who the shit you were… I keep telling you to stop fucking pushing me.” He scolded me.
“Oh boo hoo. Someone stood up to you, you’ll survive.” I teased.
He grunted and his hand slapped my butt gently. “Quit being a smart ass… now second, how the fuck did you get out the room?” he asked.
I snickered. “You didn’t lock the door, too busy running from a little old girl.”
“You really want me to beat that ass don’t you?” He asked quirking his eyebrow. I was instantly reminded of the dream I had about him while in Cayuga and I instantly blushed scarlet.
He looked at me questioning. “Why you blushing?” he asked.
I looked away. “No reason…” I said a little too quickly.
“Oh no you don’t. You fucking push me to talk to you and you’re going to lie to me? Tell me.” He urged.
I sighed. “I may have thought about it once…” I admitted.
He laughed out loud. “Oh, have you… what did you think about?”
I rolled my eyes. “Quit it! I don’t want to talk about it.”
He shook his head. “Fine! Listen, you heard what the doctor said about stress so I’ll talk to you because I don’t want to keep hearing this shit that I’m the reason you’re all stressed the fuck out. However, I don’t talk about this shit. EVER. So once this is out that’s the end of it. You drop it and I don’t want you to bring this shit up again. Now what the fuck do you want to know?” he asked.
I gaped at him open mouthed at his willingness to talk. I couldn’t believe it. Maybe he was drunk or maybe it was the orgasm he’d just had but whatever it was I’d take it. “You said something about living on the streets and group homes… I just want to know about you. How was your childhood, where are your parents, your family? Do you have siblings? I mean I just –“
“Ok, ok. I get it please stop talking. You want to know all my business. I’ll start at the beginning.” He sighed and removed his arm letting his head drop back onto the bed his eyes focused on the ceiling. “I was abandoned as a new born. I was found by a sanitation worker in a box with the trash. I’d not been there for very fucking long otherwise I’d be dead. Anyway, the story goes the box I was placed in looked shaky and he saw that it was moving a bit. I hadn’t been crying and he expected it to be a rat or some shit. Anyway, when they found me I was taken to the hospital. There was no sign of who the fuck did it, still don’t know to this day not that I’ve been keeping tabs on the case. For all I know they found the fuckers years ago and they’re rotting away in prison but it’s one in the same to me. I was John Doe, no identity, no family. No. Fucking. Trace. Once I was checked out of the hospital I went into the system. I was in foster care for a while and no one adopted me obviously and well they’re just as fucked up as you read and hear about. When I was old enough for school I was placed in group home after group home. Went to a lot of different schools and no matter what they did I wouldn’t answer to anything but that fucked up name.”
He cleared his throat before continuing. “In school though, I did adopt their last names. The first group home thought to give me their last name as to not raise suspicion about a kid named John Doe. They thought someone might actually pay too much attention. It was a good idea and fuck these people were getting money to keep me, the least they could fucking do was let me use their last name. I mainly kept to myself and did what I had to do. When I was old enough, I got a job so I didn’t look like the fucking garbage my parents and caretakers made me out to be. I was doing well in school, football, everything. All I wanted was better. When I wasn’t working or in school I was reading. Not those fairytales and shit but law books, finance books, medical books, everything. In high school, I had my life setup…” he took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “I had numerous offers from colleges for a full ride if I played football for them. I finally saw my fucking future right there. I would be away from the beginning of my life and it would all just be a horrible fucking memory. I didn’t allow myself the luxuries of other kids; I’d seen and known too much. The moment I allowed for me to have something normal of course I made the wrong fucking choice.”
He stopped then and his nostrils flared. His body had become tense and he looked splitting mad. I didn’t want him to stop though, I was getting too much insight to him for once and this might explain a lot about him. “What is it? What happened next?” I asked.
“I thought I was finally there. I had done everything I was fucking supposed to. There was a bitch, she was nice and sweet and shit. She had it for me and I thought she was pretty enough. I decided to give myself one fucking real experience that you’re supposed to have as a fucking child and of course the bitch wasn’t at all what I thought. I was 17 and I lost my virginity to her. I thought she was going to be there with me. I wasn’t delusional to think for my whole life, but to have some real relationship with someone for once in my life. She poked holes in the condoms to ensure she got pregnant and then told me it’s because she knew I was going to make it big in football. I was a fucking paycheck for her, that’s fucking all.”
My body instinctively tried to raise but his arm around me kept me planted. He blinked his eyes a few times as if refocusing on the present and looked down at me. “You have a kid out there somewhere?” I asked in di
sbelief.
He nodded slowly and my head swarmed. He had a kid but he wanted this one. Where the heck is his kid and why isn’t he a part of its life. “He’s buried in the city…” I felt chills rack through my body and goosebumps erupted. I suddenly wanted him to stop afraid of what he might say next. “When she found out I didn’t have shit she cut me off. Even when I got extra jobs and fucked up with school. Even after I fucking quit school altogether to try to support my kid she wanted nothing to do with me. She found another guy that still had a future. A fucking douche bag and her pregnant ass got into a car with him drunk as fuck. They got into an accident and they all fucking died, before I could even meet him. She was far enough along that he was removed from her and I was able to at least bury him.”
There were tears trailing down my face and I had to stifle my sobs. He’s been through so damn much and I felt a bit bad for being so hard on him. “That’s why I kind of flew off the handle with you when I found out. I felt like history was repeating itself, I can’t take that happening to me again. I can’t lose the only family I have. You’ve got to understand that’s why I had to fucking get your ass and bring you the fuck back. I couldn’t lose him too.”
I leaned up and looked into his eyes. “I didn’t know, I swear I didn’t. I wouldn’t do that to you and I wouldn’t be that careless with our child.” I promised him.
He nodded. “I know Abelie, you’re not her. I get it now after Bull literally knocked some fucking sense in me but it took some time.”
I gave him a soft kiss. He didn’t reciprocate but he didn’t push me away either. “What happened next?” I asked.
He shook his head. “I was of age. I went to the group home and packed my shit. I didn’t have a fucking thing left and nowhere to go but I wasn’t going to wait for the last check to come in and they tell me to get the fuck out. So I was on the streets for a while, doing what homeless people fucking do. I’m not going to get into details about that shit. I met Bull when I was in a shelter overnight, it’d been cold as fuck outside. He helped me learn the ropes when I almost killed a guy and would’ve probably gone to jail. We had a fucking shit load in common and for once I had a connection with someone. He was my best friend, my only friend and more often than not we crossed paths. We weren’t like attached at the hip initially but we’d run into each other at least once a week. Shelters, soup kitchens, streets…. And we had each other’s back always. Bull was messing with some other runaway bitch and got himself stabbed, I’d heard her screaming and when I saw Bull I immediately went to help him. Anyway, the leader of this club found us and took us in. This has been my family and life ever since, Bull is like my fucking brother.” He told me.
I smiled. “Yes, I know. He was the only person you let around me other than yourself initially.”
He shook his head. “It’s not that I couldn’t trust any of my other men around you. Shit, I could’ve put any of my guys who have old ladies or even Cutter to handle you I couldn’t trust you. You already had me fucking bending and that shit is impossible. I could only imagine the damage you would’ve done to anyone else. Bull was the best bet ‘cause he wouldn’t fall for your shit. Well he would but his loyalty to me would take precedence. He’s still fucking in love with you though… when you were gone I wanted to fucking knock his teeth out anytime he spoke about you. I know I flipped the other day but I couldn’t fucking help it. I know he wouldn’t fuck me over, but you… I could fucking strangle you a few times a day.” He chuckled.
I rolled my eyes. “Ditto pal.”
He shook his head. “Yea, but you’d actually do it.”
“Whatever.” Was all I could offer because when it came to him I have proven to be unpredictable.
He sighed. “So is your curiosity sated? Can you rest peacefully tonight knowing all my fucking business?”
I bit my lip anxiously causing him to curse under his breath. “Now what?” he asked exasperated.
I pouted. “One last thing I promise! What’s with the tattoo?” I asked thinking of the tattoo of an angel being consumed by flames and the flames are composed of his name on repeat.
“You’re one nosey fucking bitch…” he said flicking my nose with his finger. “The angel is supposed to be my dead son. That’s what he was; he didn’t have a chance to be anything more or less. The flames engulfing him are me –“
I cut him off. “John Doe.”
He smiled. “Someone has been paying a little too much attention to my body…” he said jokingly. “But yes, for a long time I felt like I killed an angel simply from the stupid as fuck choice I made by being with his mother. I fucking impregnated the stupid bitch and look what happened to him. I feel guilty every fucking day about it. I know she was the one that ultimately killed him, but my naivety is what put him in that fucking situation to begin with.” He ran his fingers through my hair. “Is that enough of a bedtime story for you babe?” he asked.
“What did you do to James?” I asked.
He shook his head with a smile. “I thought that was the last one?”
“This is part two…”
He rolled his eyes. “I didn’t hurt him. Gave him some Chloroform to knock him out and laid him down in the backseat. He’s fine… I’ve checked. He was worried about you though, so I had a note sent saying you needed to return back to Maryland to heal. That was one fucking story I tell you.”
I frowned. “How did you find me? How did you know about that?” I asked.
He shook his head. “None of your fucking business – now we done?”
I nodded and laid down on him making myself comfortable. “Yes.” I took a deep breath. “I’m sorry for your loss too. I won’t do that to you… pinky promise.” I instinctively locked my finger with his to cement it.
“Thanks babe… but I’m not done with you. Hands and knees now!” he demanded rolling us over and I let him take me until we both passed out.
Chapter 12
“You’re already going to make me regret giving you a phone?” Lucifer complained in my ear.
I rolled my eyes. “This was your choice last time I remembered so you could be a creeper. Now you have to live with the consequences.”
He huffed. “What the fuck you want?” he asked impatiently.
I decided to take my time answering him since he wanted to be so snippy. You’d think I accidentally put a pair of red undies in the wash with his cherished collection of white t-shirts. When he growled deep into the phone I knew his patience had run out. “Can you bring me some ice cream?” I asked.
“What the ever loving… is that what you fucking called me for?” He asked.
I scoffed. “Yes, I want strawberry cheesecake from Baskin Robins.” I informed him.
“No.”
“Yes!” I demanded.
“The whole purpose of the grocery list and shit is to put shit like that down. I’m not your fucking errand boy, girl. I’m not doing it, abso-FUCKING-lutely not. Get your ass up and raid the fucking kitchen. You’re not that fucking pregnant.”
I rolled my eyes. “There’s no more, besides we didn’t have that kind anyway. Can you please –“
“NO!” and he hung up on me muttering something about crazy pregnant fat bitches. What a jerk!
I sat and fumed. I mean really, was it so hard to just pick up one little thing? He made everything seem like such a huge deal. Somehow buying ice-cream was going to take away his manhood, what a freaking caveman. I was in his room watching the latest season of New Girl when he came in. I’d been staying in his room ever since he dragged me in here and took me for the first time since my return. He basically opened up the two rooms between the bathroom so I can have access to my stuff but I was essentially in his bed. He wasn’t locking me in either, but I had no desire to venture out much unless I was making food or something. I couldn’t party and the smoke and stuff wasn’t exactly good for me with the baby. I was fine though, I needed to be stress free and my feet were swollen as all heck.
I hea
rd Lucifer enter but didn’t give him the time of day. I was still pretty mad at his earlier reaction. I heard him undress and get into the bed. He dropped something on my lap and I looked down. A brown paper bag with Baskin Robins was in my lap and I smiled. I looked up at him and reached out for him. He pulled back and frowned at me.
“Oh no you don’t. Eat your fucking ice-cream and leave me alone.” He muttered.
“Don’t be such a crab I was really craving this. Was it really that bad?” I asked.
His head jerked back. “Fuck yea; I had to ride to four of those shits until I found one that had that fucking flavor. Leave you to pick some complicated shit…” he trailed off.
I felt a bit guilty. “You could’ve called me and I would have chosen something they had…” I offered.
He grunted. “After you made a big fucking deal about that? Fuck no; you can keep that argument to yourself. Eat your fucking ice cream, all of it and I’m going to sleep.”
I sighed. “Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something.” I informed him.
He laid down and turned to his side facing me. “What’s new? Not tonight, I’m fucking drained. We can fight tomorrow babe.”
I smiled and trailed my finger across the edge of the bruise on his face and cringed.
“Yes, you fucking socked my ass. I’m the laughing fucking stock of the club, so if I tell you to punch someone in the throat you better do that shit to prove a fucking point. You hit like a grown ass man babe.”
I smiled sheepishly. “Sorry?” I offered with a shrug.
“Yea fucking right…” he grumbled. I kissed him on the lips. He deepened it but I pulled back before it became too much.
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