by L. D. Davis
“You’re going,” Emmy said groggily. “I sent someone in my place. They’re probably almost there now.”
“How can they almost be here if you’re just now calling me to tell me you’re sick?” I questioned. Anyone she could possibly send – and I couldn’t think of anyone – lived well outside of the city. She couldn’t have called anyone moments before me and have them almost to my doorstep.
“I’ve been sick all day, Donya,” Emmy sighed. “When I knew I wasn’t getting any better earlier today, I made the arrangements. I waited until now to tell you so that you wouldn’t freak out, but you’re still freaking out.”
“Who did you send?” I demanded, not denying that I was freaking out.
“Why don’t you go get ready?” she suggested, remaining aggravatingly obtuse. “By the time you’re all dolled up, your plus one will be there.”
“Why won’t you tell me who it is?”
“It’s a surprise, damn it!” She made an ugly sound that made my stomach churn momentarily. “Gotta go,” she said quickly. “Go get ready.”
The line went dead. I slammed the phone down and growled in frustration as I got to my feet to go get ready.
I had no idea who Emmy could send. Did she send Tabitha? No, Tabitha wasn’t really talking to her. Mayson? No, Mayson was going through some unpleasant things. Leo?
I groaned, hoping she didn’t send Leo. I liked his off again on again girlfriend Leslie and I did not want to get tangled in that web.
Feeling extremely frustrated and worried, I quickly got ready for the party. I dressed in a flirty yet classic black, strapless, asymmetrical dress by Coco Chanel. Felix had been kind enough to buy it for me and I had been appreciative enough to accept it. It fit my body as if it had been made specifically for me. I paired the dress with a pair of gold Manolo Blahnik stiletto sandals that wrapped sensually around my feet and ankles. I had my hair pulled back in a tight ponytail at the base of my skull secured by a gold barrette.
I had always liked looking through Vogue, Elle and Cosmo and other fashion magazines when I was growing up, but in my everyday life, I dressed like a normal person. Maybe a few pairs of designer jeans - thanks to the Graynes, but I otherwise dressed pretty basic in jeans and a t-shirt. Since my arrival in New York, I pushed myself to learn about the various designers and whenever I could get my hands on any of their clothes and shoes, I did. I never went to a casting call without being draped in designer clothing, and since this was my first big party, I splurged on the Blahniks.
“I still think that you’re too young for what you’re wearing,” Mom had said from the doorway.
I stood in front of the floor length mirror smoothing my dress and adjusting it needlessly. Like I said, it fit perfectly.
“What do you want me to wear, mom?” I asked, not really expecting an answer.
“I think you’re moving too fast with everything,” she repeated. She had been saying it since the day I took my shirt off for Rolling Stone.
“I’m working and more work is coming in all of the time,” I reminded her. “I can’t drag my feet in this business. I’ll be too old by the time I’m old enough to legally drink.”
She sighed in response. She knew what I said was true. Max and his partners had told her repeatedly whenever she tried to stop me from doing something. I really appreciated that she was being a mom, but under the circumstances, I needed her to take a step back.
“I am really nervous about you going to this party,” she said. She had been repeating this statement since she found out I was going to the party.
“Mom, I’ve been to parties before,” I said, turning around and grabbing my black clutch off of the bed. “I’ve been to parties that would give you a heart attack. I really don’t think that I can get into that much trouble tonight.”
“You’re so naïve,” she said, turning away from me.
I rolled my eyes and balled my fists so that I wouldn’t argue with her. Maybe I was naïve, but how many more opportunities like this would arise for me?
I took a breath and marched into the living area of the suite, a nice upgrade from the one room we had when we first arrived months before.
“Do you know who Emmy sent to go with me?” I asked my mom, knowing she had to know because she had to approve the person as good enough to accompany me.
She nodded with a small smile. “They are the only reason I’m letting you go without me.”
I didn’t know who it was that my mom trusted so much to escort me to the party without her, but I was grateful because the one thing I was dreading was showing up at my first VIP party with my mommy.
“Who is it?” I asked.
“Emmy asked me to surprise you,” she shrugged.
I frowned. I still had no clue. Emmy had some cousins that lived in the area, maybe it was one of them, but I hardly knew them. It definitely couldn’t be Emmet because that would just be bizarre. Why would Emmet show up to take me to this party after we had gone three quarters of a year without speaking? That option just seemed highly unlikely, which left me wondering once again.
I adjusted the charm bracelet on my wrist, wishing for the unlikely. I snorted. What would I even say to him? What would he say to me?
“Is something funny?” mom asked me from the couch.
“Nope,” I said, deciding to go look in the mirror once more.
But then I felt it.
That tug.
That pull.
I hadn’t felt it so strongly in nearly a year. It made my gut clench and twist and lurch. My heart raced so fast that it made me light headed. The bracelet burned into my skin.
Abruptly, I turned away from the bedroom and just barely kept myself from stumbling to the door of our suite. With a trembling hand, I touched the door handle but didn’t immediately open it. What if I was wrong? What if I just ate something that disagreed with me and I confused the feelings? What if I was right? Could I handle it? Could I handle it if I was wrong?
“Damn it!” I bit out in a harsh whisper.
I pulled the door open. There was no one out outside of the door. I stepped into the hallway and found it empty.
The invisible tether strummed and vibrated and hummed.
The elevators at the end of the hall made that pleasant Ding indicating that a cab had arrived on my floor. I stood there waiting for someone to appear around the corner, but all I heard were carpeted footsteps going in the other direction towards the other wing of the hotel.
I stepped back into the suite, confused. I rubbed my sternum, trying to ease the pressure and pulling I felt there. I began to believe that I had conjured the feelings by subconsciously wanting the person coming for me to be Emmet. I had somehow, in the deeper parts of my mind, convinced myself that Emmet was coming for me. Now disappointment washed over me and weakened my knees. I held onto the wall to keep myself from falling over.
“Are you okay?” mom asked, getting to her feet.
“Fine,” I whispered. “Who is coming for me, mom?”
“I told you Emmy wanted me to keep it a secret.”
“That’s stupid!” I snapped. “Don’t I deserve to know? Is it one of my friends from New Jersey?”
“Yes,” she said simply.
Andrew? Would Emmy send Andrew Newland?
I had run into Andrew on my last trip to New Jersey. Emmy thought there was a spark between us. If there had been a spark, it was all on Andrew’s side.
I was angry that I seemed to have no control over my current circumstances. Bitterly, I stood on one foot and reached for my shoe. I was going to take the damn shoes off, take the damn dress off and close myself into my room for the night with my hidden stash of junk food and watch reruns of My So-Called Life, because this was a bunch of bullshit.
My hand had just curved around the bottom of the shoe when someone knocked on the door. Even though my chest was almost exploding with emotion and it felt like that damn binding was on fire, I told myself that I conjured it. Whoever was at
the door I was going to send away and carry on with my plan of junk food and television.
I opened the door, with curses on my lips, but the only one that made it through was “Shit.”
Emmet stood in front of me, gazing at me with those green eyes through that little-too-long hair in said eyes, and smiling with lips that I knew could knock Felix’s kisses out of any park, out of any universe.
“Emmet.”
Chapter Twenty-One
“One more picture,” my mom said, grinning like it was her birthday.
“No,” I sighed.
“Just one more, one more,” she said. “Emmet put your arm around your sister.”
I glowered at her. “This isn’t prom!” I said and then thought how pathetic it would be if my prom date was a sibling.
“You’re never going to get to go to a prom, so humor me,” she said with a note of sourness. “Emmet. Arm.”
I liked her better when she was a near-dead blob on the couch.
Emmet’s arm slinked around my waist. I gasped lightly as I was pulled close to his body. I wanted to pull away. I wanted to move closer.
I didn’t smile for the pictures. I was trying to focus on breathing while in close proximity to Emmet.
He hadn’t said much since he arrived. He said hello and I said hello, and then my mom jumped in. It was a surprise because she knew I hadn’t seen Emmet since he left for college and isn’t it nice to see him again. Then she started in on the pictures.
My mother’s behavior was…perplexing. She was never the excitable type, but while taking the pictures she didn’t stop smiling. She took picture after picture and even dabbed at her eyes a few times. I didn’t understand it. I wanted her to simmer down and go back to being her quiet mildly pessimistic self.
When her excitement got the best of her and she started looking tired and drained, she finally let us go. Though I had just thought some unkind things about her, her seemingly constant state of tiredness was nagging me a little. As Emmet and I walked out of the door, I kept throwing glances at her. Before the door closed, I saw her sag with exhaustion.
“She must be on some really good drugs,” Emmet said, leading me by the elbow towards the bank of elevators.
My attention shifted from my mother and I looked at the man beside me. He was dressed in a dark Armani suit without a tie. His white shirt was unbuttoned several buttons and the jacket was open. He looked good, really good. I couldn’t drag my eyes away from him for several moments. Only because I had to step onto the elevator did I finally tear my eyes away.
“You look amazing,” Emmet said quietly.
“Thank you,” I managed in a soft voice.
We were quiet for the rest of the ride to the lobby. Emmet put his hand on the small of my back to guide me outside where a limo waited for us.
“Where did this come from?” I asked as the driver opened the door for us.
I carefully got in first and moved over as far as I could go. Emmet slid in after me and left very little space between us.
“I thought since we were going to a VIP party, we should at least ride in style,” Emmet said.
“You did this?” I asked, turning my head like a puppy.
He nodded as his eyes raked over me. I suppressed a shiver and folded my hands in my lap. I looked down when I felt Emmet’s fingers on my wrist. He was slowly turning the bracelet.
“How have you been?” he asked softly.
I looked up and met his green eyes.
“Surviving,” I whispered. I turned away from him and looked at the bustling city life outside of my window. My chest hurt. My skin burned where he was touching me. The invisible tether vibrated softly between us. I wanted to cry. I wanted to cry so badly. Emmet was finally right next to me, but I almost couldn’t handle it.
After he had left for college, it took me a few days to get myself together. The experience left me gutted and weak. I couldn’t erase the memory of Emmet’s face when I uttered those terrible words. I couldn’t forget the shake of his head when I turned to him in the car to apologize. I couldn’t forget how it felt to feel him leave me without a goodbye. It took me a couple of months to accept the fact that he wasn’t going to call and he wasn’t going to reappear in my life. By the time New Year’s had rolled around, I had to accept the fact that he was gone from my life entirely. These weren’t easy circumstances to accept. I had to let some coldness seep into me. I had to let it settle in and harden. Only when Emmy gave me the bracelet did the bitter cold wall began to crack a little. Now, sitting within inches of him, I felt like it was going to shatter altogether, and that wasn’t necessarily a good thing.
Emmet must have sensed the tension and emotions within me. He pulled his hand back and put it on his knee with a sigh.
“So, you met Felix at a photo shoot for RollingStone?” he asked.
“Yes,” I nodded.
“That’s incredible. You must have impressed the right people to get that gig.”
The impression came during the shoot, but I didn’t tell him that. Instead, I said “Just got lucky I guess.”
“Donya,” Emmet said my name softly, but it sounded like he was pleading.
I turned my head and looked at him. His eyes were so damn sorrowful that it made my breath hitch.
“Do you want me to take you to the party and leave you there on your own? I can come back for you later.”
I was startled by his question.
“Why?”
He sighed. “You’re so stiff,” he said quietly. “I have the feeling that you really don’t want me here.”
I stared, because I wasn’t entirely sure what I wanted, and I told him so.
“What will make it easier for you?” he asked with sincerity. “I’ll do whatever you need to feel comfortable.”
My eyes closed slowly and I took a long, deep breath. As I let the air out slowly between my lips, I opened my eyes and looked at Emmet again with a little more clarity.
“I want you here,” I said honestly.
Some of the tension eased on his face. “Can we just try to have a good night?” he asked. “Can we just for tonight put the past out of our minds?”
“I don’t know,” I said softly, but then continued bitterly. “What happens at the end of the night? If you’re just going to go back to hating me, I don’t think I want to continue. I’ll go back to the suite and go to bed.”
“I don’t hate you. I’ve never hated you. I promise you that,” he said quickly.
“Don’t promise me anything, Emmet,” I snapped. “You promised that I would always have your friendship but you broke that promise. You didn’t even give me that much before you ran away to Cambridge.”
“I didn’t run away, Donya,” he said patiently. “I went away to school.”
“You cut me off!” I yelled.
Emmet opened his mouth to argue, but quickly shut it. He sighed heavily and rubbed a few fingers across his forehead. After a moment, he was able to look at me again.
“Coffee,” he said.
I turned my head. “What?”
“Coffee,” he said the word slowly.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“You asked what happens at the end of the night and I’m answering your question. Coffee. At the end of the night we will have coffee.”
I crossed my arms and faced the front of the car. It was eerily quiet inside the vehicle.
“I want a donut,” I said stubbornly.
“What?”
“I want a donut with my coffee,” I snapped, glaring at him.
His lips twitched as he tried not to smile. “You drive a hard bargain.”
“Shut up,” I said, as my anger began to slip through my fingers.
“I hope you don’t ask for a special donut, like one with sprinkles or something,” Emmet said, unable to hide his smile. “I’m not sure if that would be a deal I could close on.”
I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing. It wasn’t even tha
t funny, but I couldn’t help the little bit of laughter that bubbled through my lips.
We fell into light conversation for the last few minutes of the trip. I was still off kilter being so close to Emmet again, and I was still shocked that he came at all, but I tried to push that to the back of my mind and just enjoy the conversation.
When Emmet got out of the car in front of Felix’s building, he held out his hand to help me out of the car. I looked at it blankly for a moment before placing my hand in his. His thumb glided gently over my knuckles, sending tiny shockwaves of electricity racing up my arm. I smiled shyly at him on the sidewalk before we were escorted by security through some paparazzi and bystanders. The Paps asked questions that I didn’t listen to. I heard my name, but I had heard it more than a few times since hanging around Felix. I didn’t pay them any mind.
“What are they talking about?” Emmet asked me after security cleared us to go up to the penthouse.
“Who?”
“I couldn’t hear everyone all at once,” he said, his brow creasing with concentration. “But I heard the word ‘nude’ more than once.”
My eyebrows arched. It was possible they were talking about the RollingStone cover, but that wasn’t supposed to be released for another few days, not to mention I wasn’t really nude. Just partially…
“Maybe they have me mixed up with someone else,” I said, waving my free hand dismissively as we stepped into the elevator.
“Hmm,” Emmet said. I thought he would harp on it, but he didn’t. He looked me over again and ran a knuckle up my bare arm, making me shiver. “Did I tell you how awesome you look?”
“No,” I said, biting back my smile. “You said that I looked amazing, but you may tell me how awesome I look.”
He chuckled and said “You look awesome, Donya.”
“Thank you, Emmet,” I said and gave him a full blown smile.
His smile not only touched his eyes, but filled them. If the elevator doors didn’t open just then, it was possible that I could have stared into his eyes all night in that small box.
“Hello, Miss Stewart,” Rocco, the big beefy man in the suit that followed Felix everywhere, greeted me with a smile outside the double doors that lead into Felix’s penthouse.
