STONE KINGS MOTORCYCLE CLUB: The Complete Collection

by Daphne Loveling

  I told him how I had had to claw my way out of that marriage to gain my life back, and how I was terrified of losing myself again. That I was terrified of trusting.

  “You told me I have to figure out what I want,” I said, my voice nearly a whisper. I hadn’t been able to look him in the eye since I started talking. I fixed a point on the coffee table, as though I was alone in the room, talking to myself.

  “You said I needed to figure out if I want a man in my life who will be there for me. Someone I can trust.” Finally, I turned to him, meeting his eyes with difficulty. “The truth is,” I said, brushing away a tear, “I want someone to trust. But I’m terrified to let myself be vulnerable again.”

  Trig’s eyes were locked on mine, but he didn’t move.

  “Eva,” he said. “Why are you so afraid? David is one man. Only one man, out of all the men in the world. Why would you let him make you afraid of everyone else?” He frowned. “Why would you let him make you afraid of me? Of us?”

  I shook my head, a shaky laugh escaping me as I wiped away another tear. “Well. See. There’s the second thing I wanted to talk to you about.”

  My heart was pounding in my chest. I was so afraid he’d laugh at me. So afraid he’d think I was being ridiculous. But even worse… so afraid that he wouldn’t tell me the truth.

  “There was someone else who hurt me once.” I glanced at him. “His name… was Caleb.”

  Trig’s eyes widened, but he didn’t interrupt.

  “I think…” my voice broke, and I had to clear my throat twice to continue. “I think I was a little in love with him, back in the day. He made me feel things no other boy did. And for some odd reason, he seemed to like me, too.

  “One day, he took me on a motorcycle ride. It was…” I paused, pushing down tears. “It was probably the best day of my life up until that point. Caleb was really, really nice. I felt like I could talk to him. And,” I smiled at the memory, “He was my first kiss.”

  “Eva…” Trig began.

  “No,” I shook my head stubbornly. “Let me keep going.”

  He nodded and sat back, staring at me.

  “When we drove back to town from the hot springs, my mom… my drunk mom came flying out of the house and started yelling at me in front of the whole neighborhood. In front of him.” I stifled a sob. “I had never been so embarrassed in my life. In fact, I’m not sure I’ve ever been so embarrassed since. I couldn’t imagine what Caleb must have thought of me. I felt so exposed.” I shook my head. “All I could hope for was that somehow, somehow, it wouldn’t make any difference.

  “Well,” I continued, my voice turning bitter. “I found out later that it had made a difference. Debbie Turner, who lived across the street, told me.” I risked a glance at Trig, whose stare had turned intense. “You remember Debbie, don’t you? I’m sure you do. If I remember correctly, you and she dated for a while after that.”

  I pushed down my anger enough to keep going. Here it was: the moment of truth.

  Finally, I looked him in the eyes. “Debbie told me that you told her about what happened! That you told her I acted all high and mighty, like a princess, but in fact I was just trash like my mother!”

  Trig’s eyes grew wide. “Jesus, Eva!” he cried. “I never said that! I never, ever would have said that!” The shock on his face was evident.

  “No?” I retorted. “Then how did she know you had called me princess, Trig?” My anger began to bubble over, even as a tiny part of me began to doubt myself. “How could she have possibly known that, unless you told her?”

  He shook his head in disbelief. “I don’t know, exactly… Eva, for fuck’s sake, you’ve got to believe me! It was so long ago, but Christ, I know I didn’t say that.” He leaned forward and took my hands in his, not letting go when I tried to pull away. “Eva, I was fucking crazy about you. I swear to you. I never would have said that.”

  He looked off into the distance, remembering. “Yes, I will admit, I was shocked when your mom came outside. But Jesus, I didn’t judge you for it! I was just sad for you, knowing that you’d have to go inside and face that. And there was nothing I could do for you! You have no idea how damn helpless I felt.” He grimaced at the memory.

  I wanted to believe him. Oh, how I wanted to believe him. But how could I? I knew he’d talked to Debbie about me. There was no other explanation for that.

  “Why did you talk to Debbie?” I cried. “She always hated me, her family always looked down their noses at my mom. If you wanted to protect me, then why would you tell her something she could throw in my face?”

  He looked at me in surprise. “Eva, I didn’t know that! I didn’t even know you were neighbors until that night.” He frowned in concentration, then continued. “I do remember talking to Debbie about you, a couple days later at a party. She came up to me and said she noticed us leaving the high school on my bike. I think I’d had a few drinks by then, and all I could think about that weekend was you, and seeing you again.”

  His eyes widened. “Shit, I do remember her asking me about whether we’d gone to your house, and I must have told her I called you princess. You were always so elegant, you had this way about you like you were just so much more together than most kids our age. I admired you for it. Hell, Eva, I never, ever would have used that word as an insult about you.” His eyes pleaded with mine. “You have to believe me, Eva. Whatever happens or doesn’t happen between us. Please believe I would never have done that to you.”

  My head felt like a heavy weight on my neck. I didn’t know what to think. For so many years, I had thought of Caleb Jackson as a horrible, two-faced liar, and the first boy to ever break my heart.

  Now, with Trig sitting in front of me, his eyes beseeching me, I started to realize that the version of events I had carried around in my heart all this time might not even have been real.

  I had never marched up to Caleb back then and demanded that he explain himself. I had just assumed that, like my father, he was not what he seemed and couldn’t be trusted to stick around when things got tough. The heartbreak I had experienced made me afraid to trust again, until David. And then David had hurt me again, confirming my worst fears about men in general.

  But what if the Caleb I had thought I knew was a complete fabrication — the product of a jealous and vindictive high school girl, playing on my own fears that a boy like him could never like a girl like me?

  “I want to.” I bent my head, feeling my face reddening. “I want to believe you. And, thank you for not making me feel like this is some silly, stupid thing.” A soft, shaky laugh escaped my throat.

  “Vanessa told me I was being an idiot for still being hung up on this so many years later. But it was more than just the idea that a boy I liked said something mean about me behind my back.” I gazed at him searchingly. “It was the idea that a boy I was crazy about saw my deepest, darkest secret, and then mocked me for it in front of someone else.” His eyes grew soft with emotion. “It was my worst fear, you know?” I whispered. “That someone would see deep inside me and use what they found to hurt me.”

  Trig nodded, and tightened his grip on my hands.

  “Eva, trust is always a leap of faith,” he said slowly. “Nothing’s ever certain. That’s the thing about trust. It’s always about giving up some control.”

  One of his hands reached up and softly brushed my cheek.

  “When that asshole doc brought you into my hospital room and said you were being assigned as my PT, you were probably the last person I would have chosen. Ten years you’d been gone from my life. And just when you come back into it, it’s to see me at my weakest. I wasn’t sure I’d ever walk again, much less ride, and I was gonna have to spend the next two months of my life with you watching me stumble and strain to do things that any five-year old could do with no problem at all.”

  Trig sighed. “Shit, part of me was even sort of relieved when you tried to pawn me off on your friend Vanessa. At least that way, I didn’t have to put up with hav
ing you watch me fail every day.”

  His thumb grazed my bottom lip; I shivered.

  “But I knew you were my best chance at getting better. I trusted you. And that meant that I had to give up some control. Not to mention I would have given anything to keep seeing you every day.” He grinned. “So I convinced Vanessa to help me figure out a scheme to get you back as my PT.”

  “What?!” I looked at him, stunned.

  His eyes twinkled. “Yeah. She knew you were too much of a control freak not to take me back if you thought I wasn’t progressing as well as I should have been.”

  “Oh, my God.” I seethed. “Vanessa is a dead woman.”

  “Come on, give her a break,” he chuckled. “Believe me, she told me in no uncertain terms that I would pay dearly if I hurt a hair on your head.” Trig let out a low whistle. “She is vicious. And she cares a hell of a lot about you.”

  “I can’t believe it.” I shook my head ruefully. “My best friend, plotting against me.”

  “Anyway,” he continued. “My point being, I had to suffer through giving up some control in order to trust you. Not only that, but I had to let myself believe you when you told me I was going to get better.”

  Trig’s voice softened. “Eva, I wouldn’t tell anyone else in the world this. But I was fucking terrified after the accident. I was sure I’d never ride again. I felt like half a goddamn man.” His gaze bored into mine. “You made me believe otherwise. I had to trust you. And if you hadn’t noticed, it worked.” He nodded toward his leg.

  He was right. I had to admit it. And damn him for pointing out that he and I had been fighting against the same things: Giving up control. Trusting someone in spite of all evidence to the contrary. Not hiding behind a safe lie, in order to confront the bold truth.

  “Damn you for having a point,” I sighed.

  Trig moved closer, and lifted my chin toward him.

  “Eva Van Buren,” he began, his voice deep and rich. “Your strength and determination kept me going. I am a better, stronger man because of you. And along the way, I fell head over heels in love with you all over again.”

  His lips brushed mine. “Please. I’m asking you to trust me. About the past, and about now. I know you’re afraid I’ll hurt you. But I’m asking you to believe me. Because I’ve loved you for over ten years, and I’m not about to stop now.”

  My eyes shone. “I love you, too, Trig.”

  And with that sentence, spoken in a trembling voice, ten years of hurt and misunderstanding fell away.

  Whatever the future might hold, I would embrace it. If I got hurt, that was just a risk I would have to take… for love.

  21

  Trig

  Eva took me by the hand and wordlessly led me upstairs.

  I followed her into her bedroom, and watched in silence as she latched and locked it behind us.

  “Just in case Mrs. Hayes comes in with Zoe to get something,” she explained.

  Then, she slipped into my waiting arms, and arched her neck up as my lips came down on hers.

  The frantic sound of our breathing was all that broke the silence. Eva pressed against me and moaned against my mouth, sliding her hips against my growing erection.

  I stifled a groan and grabbed her ass, pulling her to me. She began to grind against my straining cock, and I relished the sweet agony of it. But soon, I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to have her.

  But before I could turn her and throw her down on the bed, she slipped away from my kiss and ran her hands down my chest, stopping at my waist. Eva knelt, and looked up at me with dark eyes full of need. Her hands began to undo the button and zipper on my jeans. Biting her lip in anticipation, she pulled them down, until my cock sprang free.

  I drew in a sharp breath, locking eyes with her as she licked her lips. Her hand came up and circled my throbbing root, stroking it slowly once, twice. A bead of precum emerged, and she stuck out her tongue and lapped at it, dragging it slowly across my flesh. I stopped breathing for a moment and had to fight for control. “Jesus, Eva,” I groaned.

  She smiled up at me wickedly in response. Then, flattening her tongue, she began to lick and lap at the underside of my cock, before wrapping her lips around the head and sliding it into her mouth.

  “Fuck,” I hissed. She swirl her tongue around my head, teasing it and licking at the salty fluid I was leaking. My eyes closed, my hands fisted in her hair as she began to bob, slowly, taking me a little deeper into her mouth each time. I angled my hips and began to thrust to meet her, barely moving, prolonging the agony as I felt the skin grow tighter around my ever-hardening dick. I would never last if we kept doing this. I was no more than thirty seconds away from blowing my load down her throat.

  “Stop,” I rasped. I pulled away as gently as I could and helped her up, then pushed her down on the bed. I grabbed the hem of my T-shirt and pulled it over my head, then slid between Eva’s legs and pushed her dress up, exposing a flesh-colored thong that barely covered her mound. I pulled it down with my teeth, dragging it down her gorgeous legs and flinging it behind me.

  Then my tongue was plunged inside her, licking her juices, sucking her clit, dragging the flat of my tongue over it as she bucked and thrust against me. I took her pulsing nub between my lips and began to suck and tease. Her hips strained toward me, her thighs tensing. Then, dimly, I heard her grab for a pillow and place it over her mouth. An instant later, she exploded, the pillow muffling her screams as she came.

  There was no way I could wait a second longer to be inside her. I knelt and guided my the head of my cock against her still-pulsing clit, coating it with her juices as I groaned in pleasure. I grabbed her hips and pushed inside, rough and deep. Her hands clutched at my arms as I repositioned myself closer, then began to thrust, hard, fast, and desperate. Eva cried my name, coaxing me, begging me.

  “Fuck, Eva,” I growled, as her pussy began to tighten around me. My hand grabbed hers, placing it on her mound, and she began to caress her clit as I pounded into her. With a gasp, she bucked again, a second orgasm ripping through her, and I thrust deep inside her one final time and then froze, filling her silently with a deep shudder.

  I reached down and pulled her up to me so she was sitting on my thighs. She wrapped her legs around me, pressing her hips to me to keep me inside her as deeply as possible. We kissed deeply, passionately, skin to skin.

  “I love you, Trig,” she whispered. “I love you so much.”

  “Eva.” My mouth trailed down to her neck. “I love you. Jesus, I’ve waited so long for this.”

  “I know,” she breathed. “But here it is.”

  We fell back on the bed, Eva still wrapped in my arms, and dozed for a few minutes. I woke up before her, and propped myself up on my elbow to watch her sleep. Eventually, she must have felt me staring at her, and opened her eyes.

  “You’re kind of a creeper,” she smiled at me sleepily.

  “Sorry. You can hardly blame me for wanting to look at something so beautiful.”

  “Trig Jackson,” she teased. “How was I supposed to know you’d turn out to be such a romantic?”

  “Beats the hell out of me,” I shrugged. “I didn’t know it, either. I guess you bring it out in me.”

  I kissed her, and soon I felt myself growing hard again.

  “My goodness,” she whispered, sliding on top of me. “Looks like it’s time for another go.”

  Half an our later, we were a sweaty, exhausted mess, tangled up in the sheets. “Mmmm…” Eva cooed. “That was fun.”

  I chuckled. “We could do it again.”

  “I don’t know if I could survive it,” she yawned. “You wore me out.”

  “You know,” I murmured as we lay there, “I kind of miss Zoe. It’s been more than a week since I’ve seen her. It feels weird.”

  Eva turned toward me. “Really?”

  “Yeah.” I sighed in mock irritation. “Damned if she hasn’t sorta wound me around her little finger.”

  Eva leaned up a
nd kissed me softly on the cheek. “She thinks you hung the moon, Trig. It’s been tough this last week. She kept asking about you.” She looked at me, her eyes shining. “Zoe’s never really had a man in her life. David pretty much ignored her from the beginning, even when we were still married. And we’ve been separated or divorced since she was two.”

  “Eva.” I kissed her forehead. “I know it wasn’t that easy for you to let Zoe get close to me. You’ve probably been worried about introducing her to men.”

  I tried to think about how to phrase what I wanted to say next.

  “From everything you’ve told me,” I said slowly, “you’ve tried as hard as you could to protect her from the disappointments you had in your own life. With your own dad. But I promise you. I won’t hurt that little girl. I won’t leave her.” I pulled her closer. “And I won’t leave you.”

  Eva didn’t say anything, but a soft sniffle told me everything I needed to know.

  “Do you want to go get her from Mrs. Hayes?” she finally said in a shaky voice. “We could go together.”

  “Yeah, let’s do that.” A rumble of laughter came from deep in my throat as I remembered something. “She was saying to me last time I saw her that she wanted to color in some of my tattoos.”

  Eva giggled. “So that’s why she likes you — you’re a walking, talking coloring book!”

  We lay there for a few more minutes, then got up and dressed ourselves. Then, stepping out into the cool evening, we walked down the block like any other couple in love, holding hands. We were just turning up the walk to Mrs. Hayes’ house when Zoe came bursting out the front door.

  “Mommy! Trig!” she cried, running up to the two of us. She flew toward me and latched herself onto my leg.

  “Hey, there, buttercup! Long time no see,” I said, bending down to give her a hug.

  “It’s been forever!” she complained. “Mrs. Hayes, it’s Trig!” she called back to the older woman who was just emerging from the house.