The heat of the sun wasn’t nearly as hot as the flames that pulsed inside his body. He wanted more of her—needed so much more, but how could he ask for anything? She wanted someone to give her what she needed, not take what she couldn’t give. In that moment, he didn’t give a shit. All he knew was that his mouth on hers felt right.
Chapter Thirteen
Sosie snuck down the staircase while Baxter showered. Today was their first official date, and she wanted to look alluring. At the bottom of the stairs, she turned right and knocked on the bakery door.
Picking up muffins for breakfast yesterday led to a conversation about the Fourth of July community picnic, concert, and her and Baxter's date. Katie offered to help Sosie with her hair and makeup, which she didn’t use much of these days since she couldn’t be sure it wasn’t all over her face.
“Come in,” Katie said as soon as she opened the door.
There was a moment of silence where Sosie grew self-conscious. She was wearing the blue sundress she found in the bag of hand-me-downs. She didn’t know if it was in good shape or not. For all she knew, it was a mess.
“Is this okay?” She brushed her hands over the soft fabric.
“You look gorgeous.” Katie tugged her inside the back room of the bakery. “You don’t need to do anything else. You’re a beautiful woman, Sosie, and Baxter likes you the way you are.”
“Can you believe how this all came about?” A warm, comforting feeling twisted up her spine and spread through her limbs. “It’s all too much to take in—to actually accept.”
“Oh,” Katie said. “I believe. Don’t forget I came here broken and bruised too. I was searching for something. At the time, I didn’t think it was Bowie, but I told Sage that when I saw the one, I’d know it, and there he was looking all glum and pissy on that end stool at the Brewhouse. I knew right then he was mine.”
“I can’t see Baxter, but I feel him,” she tapped the area above her heart. “Right here.”
“I think you might be luckier to not see him.”
Sosie smiled. “Is he ghastly to look at? I don’t care because when he kisses me, nothing else matters.”
“Baxter, ghastly? No, I don’t think he could ever be called that. He’s not my type because I like them brooding and grumpy, but Baxter’s a good-looking man. What I meant by my statement was you have to fall in love with the essence of a person. Superficial stuff like looks and clothes and cars don’t make a difference. When you look at a man, you see who he is on the inside. I’d say that’s a remarkable gift to be given.”
She hadn’t considered her blindness a gift, but maybe there were some benefits. “That’s not the only thing. I get the best parking spots because even though I don’t drive,” she giggled, thinking about the day Baxter let her. “I get handicapped parking. I don’t freak out when the power shuts off because it’s dark in my world all the time.” She no longer felt the fear of the dark because Baxter was there. He seemed to sense when it suffocated her, and he pulled her closer to let her know she wasn’t alone. “I can read all night long and not wake anyone with a light.”
“You learned braille?”
She smiled, feeling proud. “I did. Though, I’m slow at it. It’s not second nature to me, and I have to translate it in my brain, so it’s a process, but I can read.”
“Do you have any books?”
She shook her head. “No, not with me. I was reading Harry Potter, but it’s at my apartment. When I drove up here, I wasn’t expecting to stay.”
“You’re bilingual. That’s so cool. I’m glad you’re looking at the bright side of things. When I was living in the hospital, I had to find the shiny gold nuggets in my life of coal. Some days it was a visit from an old friend, and at other times, it was the chocolate pudding.”
Sosie had heard all the stories about the townsfolk. In a small town, all you had to do was keep an ear open and someone was always telling a story. If you paid attention, you could learn a lot.
“How is your heart now?”
She heard Katie thump her chest. “It’s full.”
“I should hurry. Baxter will wonder what happened to me.”
“Right. Can’t keep the man waiting on his woman.”
That thought thrilled her. “I’m not his woman. He’s just a good guy who got saddled with me. Thankfully, he doesn’t seem to mind.”
“When I get through with you, he won’t let you out of his sight.”
Katie styled her hair and helped her apply mascara. It was funny how she hadn’t worn it unless someone could help her put it on. She pinked her cheeks with a sweep of blush and slicked her lips with something she called a stain.
Sosie turned in a circle, making the hem of the dress float out and come down to skim her thighs. “Is the dress good? I don’t have a big spaghetti stain on the front or anything, do I?”
“No, it’s perfect. In truth, it never looked as good on me.”
Sosie’s eyes opened wide. “This was yours?”
“Yes, it would seem that you and I are the same size.”
“Lucky me,” Sosie said.
“No, lucky me. I was happy to clean out some stuff. I’ve got another bag for you at home. I’ll bring it by tomorrow.” She set her hands on Sosie’s shoulders. “Let nothing stand in the way of your happiness.” She turned her around, so she faced the door. “Now, go get your man.”
Sosie’s heart beat hard enough to bruise her chest. Would Baxter be pleased, or would he take one look at her and run? Was this the direction he thought they were going—a direction that would take them somewhere different. If she could just see him, she’d know what he was thinking, but she couldn’t, so she went with her gut feelings. Trust wasn’t something she used to give easily, but now she had to have blind faith, or she wouldn’t be able to navigate her life.
She climbed the stairs and opened the door. The smell of his body wash and cologne floated in the air.
Heavy footfalls approached her, then silenced. “Baxter, is that you?”
The wood flooring squeaked, and hands touched her arms and moved up to her bare shoulders. “God, you're stunning.”
She laid her hand flat against his chest and moved it until she touched his strong jawline. Her fingertips slid across his smooth, just shaved face to his lips. Full lips that knew how to pull moans straight from her empty lungs. She brushed over his cheekbones and up into his hair.
“You’re not so bad yourself.”
“The other day you said I was a hottie; how do you know?”
“I feel it in my heart. I’m not talking about your looks, though I’m told you are a nice-looking man.”
“Oh yeah, by whom?”
“Don’t get your hopes up that there’s another fan other than Mercy. Katie is married and has her own sexy man.”
“I don’t know if I like you thinking any other men are sexy.”
“You’re the only sexy man I’m interested in now.”
“Now?” His lips brushed against hers. “Planning on dumping me soon for a better model.”
She lifted on her tiptoes and touched her lips to his. “I’m quite satisfied with the model I have.”
“Oh, sweetheart. I haven’t even begun to satisfy you.”
A shiver of need raced to her core, where it heated and throbbed. “I like the sound of that.”
His kiss was a promise of things to come. Things she could only imagine.
“We’ve got to go, or we’ll miss the barbecue, and I need a store of energy for what we’re doing tonight.”
Giddy excitement filled her. She hoped all this teasing wasn’t simply that. She’d spent the last few nights in bed with Baxter. The only thing separating them was his sweatpants and a sense of honor.
They filled up on burgers and chips and found a spot of lawn where Baxter laid out a quilt to save their space for the concert and fireworks. He took her from booth to booth, where vendors set up to sell their wares.
“I’ll take that one,” Baxter to
ld the person behind the counter. Moments later, she felt a braided piece of leather being tied to her wrist. In the center was an etched metal in the shape of an oval. “What does it say?”
He rubbed his thumb over it. “Fearless. I think it’s fitting.”
“I’m afraid of everything.”
“Not true. You are a warrior.”
She stood a little taller with his praise.
She pulled her sunglasses from her bag and put them on.
“Sunglasses?”
She nodded. “Sure, I can still get cataracts, and sometimes, I can see shadows and flashes of light. Like today, I can tell it’s sunny, not only because I’m breaking a sweat, but somehow, the brightness leaks through the dark.”
“Interesting. What else do you see?”
She held his hand. “I swear, occasionally, I get a glimpse of stuff for a nanosecond like my retinas are talking to my brain. It doesn’t happen often, but it happens sometimes.”
“Like the blue couch?”
“Yes, like the couch. I can’t tell you anything else that’s in the apartment, but I knew that sofa was blue.”
They moved forward, Baxter guiding her through the crowd. “Do you believe in fate?”
She stopped and lifted her eyes toward him. “Do you mean like meeting the perfect person at the right time?”
“Sure, but more than that.”
“There’s more than epic love?” The smell of waffle cones floated around them. “Is Sam’s Scoops here? If so, I’d say that was fate because I’m dying for an ice-cream cone.”
They moved to the back of the line. “Seriously, I’ve been thinking about your life. All you’ve done is paint. You’ve said it yourself, your whole world was nothing but paints and canvases. What if going blind was the universe’s way of telling you to open your life to other possibilities?”
They moved forward a little at a time.
“I would have rather received an invitation to try something different. This was baptism by fire.”
He entwined his fingers with hers. “Seriously, would you have accepted a chance to change your life?”
“No, because I didn’t think I needed a change. I still eked out a living. I could take a couple of jobs a year, and I had what I needed.”
“What’s the Albright job?”
The mention of it made her stomach ache. “It’s a massive canvas of their ancestral home. I’m to show all four seasons in the same painting. Imagine starting out in the gardens in spring and walking past the castle-like structure in winter. It takes so long to move across the property that you experience all four seasons on the journey.”
“That sounds amazing, but now what?”
After a heavy sigh, she said, “I’ll have to find a way to pay them back or figure out how to paint blind.”
“Sosie, the painting you worked on was amazing until you smeared it and tore the canvas. Even then, I think it’s remarkable. That’s why I kept it.”
“It’s trash, toss it.”
“It’s not, and I’m keeping it. You said I could. Are you taking it back?”
They made it to the counter, and she breathed in the sweetness. “I’ll have a single scoop of Chocolate Dingleberry.”
“How did you know that was one of today’s flavors?”
She had no idea. Was it another case of her seeing something she couldn’t? “I think I heard someone say the name. Anything that’s chocolate is okay in my book.”
He ordered the same, and they made their way around the field and back to the blanket on the grass. The cool air raised gooseflesh on her skin, which meant the sun had already set.
Baxter offered her a jacket he’d brought along “just in case”. He was the most thoughtful man she’d met.
“Tell me, the other day at Gray’s, you jotted perfectly scaled walls and flooring on the paper. How did you do that?”
“I pressed into the paper with the pencil and that left lines. I guess it was like braille. I felt my way across the page.” She knew what he thought. “It’s not possible. The canvas gives, so I would lose the impression in seconds, and if you think I can follow the paint lines, then you’re wrong too. The paint stays wet too long, and I’d smear it trying to find the end of my last line.”
“You already tried that. That’s why the canvas I have is smudged.”
“Yep.”
“We’ll figure it out. When do you have to have the Albright painting done?”
“I have until the beginning of August to get Theresa her pictures, and until March to get the thirty grand. It’s a huge undertaking, but as soon as they found out I lost my sight, they worried. I’m holding them to the contract, even if I can’t deliver. That will at least give me time to come up with a solution.”
“Don’t you have any paintings to sell. What about the stuff you did as a child?”
She found it endearing he’d done his homework. “My mom has a few, but I’m not asking her for them.”
“Not even to help you?”
She shook her head. “Nope.”
The strum of a guitar silenced all the surrounding voices. She sat between Baxter’s legs, leaning against his chest.
She closed her eyes and took in the beat of the drums, the rhythm of the bass, the thrum of the guitar, and Samantha’s sweet voice. The words were hauntingly fitting for her life.
Never give up.
Never give in.
It’s not over until it’s over.
Life is a dark place.
Look for the light.
It could be in a voice, in a touch, or a scent on the wind.
Don’t give up.
Don’t give in.
It’s not over until it’s over.
When the final song finished, the first of the fireworks soared into the sky and exploded with a boom. She kept her eyes closed and let her memory fill her mind with a picture.
“Tell me what you see,” she said to Baxter.
His lips were close to her ear. “I see a breathtaking woman who makes me feel more vibrant than the colors in those fireworks.”
His whisper against her ear did all kinds of things to her body. His words did the same to her heart. When her world was turned upside down, she resigned herself to a life of loneliness, but Baxter Black changed her mind about that.
“Thank you. I feel so many things when I’m with you.”
“Do you want to feel more, Sosie? Are you ready for more?”
“So much more,” she said on the exhale of a breath. She leaned back and listened to the explosions overhead. Each one got her closer to the end. Or was it the beginning?
The air crackled with excitement as the last boom sounded. They stood, and she waited off to the side while Baxter folded the blanket.
Consumed by the herd of people, she got jostled and pushed in every direction. “Baxter,” she called as the momentum of the crowd took her away. She didn’t have the time to pull out her cane. It took everything to stay on her feet.
In the distance, she heard her name. “Sosie,” he screamed. “Sosie, where are you?”
She could hear the fear in his voice.
She lifted on her tiptoes, hoping to make herself taller so he could see her. “Baxter, I’m here,” she screamed. Someone ran into her from behind, knocking her to the ground. She was certain she’d get trampled to death when strong arms wrapped around and swept her up. “I’ve got you.” He buried his face in the crook of her neck and kept up the mantra, “I’ve got you. I’ve got you.” He said it repeatedly. Was he trying to convince her or himself that she was safe?
“You can’t run off like that. I turned my back, and you disappeared.”
She laughed because if she thought about her fear, she would fall to pieces. “I got swept away in the crowd. How many people are here?”
“Thousands.” He held her tighter and moved through the crowd with her in his arms.
“Do you have the blanket?”
“Nope, it doesn’t matter. All that
matters is you’re okay. God, Sosie, you scared the hell out of me.”
“You? I wasn’t sure where I’d be once the momentum stopped.”
“I told you, I suck at taking care of people.”
She wanted to believe he was joking, but she heard the disappointment in his voice.
Reaching up, she gripped his chin and forced it down, so he had to look at her. “I don’t need you to take care of me. All I need is for you to care for me.”
By the silence around them, she knew most people had moved past. He dropped her legs, and she slipped down his body.
“I care about you.”
She tossed her purse over her shoulder and threaded her fingers through his. “Then take me home and show me.”
Chapter Fourteen
Performance anxiety had never been a thing for him until this moment. He asked her if she was ready for more, but was he? Having a girlfriend was scary enough, but a blind girlfriend put a new twist on things.
Though she claimed to be capable of caring for herself, he’d seen firsthand that she couldn’t, and neither could he.
“Your hand is shaking,” she hugged his arm.
“I lost you in the crowd. That was my fault. I’m so sorry.”
“Not your fault at all. It’s not like I got swept out to sea. I got jostled in the throng of people and lost my direction. I would have been okay. You could have left me, and I would have used my phone to get back.”
She gripped his arm like he might get away.
“I would never leave you Sosie. Seems to me like too many have done that in the past.”
His step faltered, but he knew it was the truth that tripped him up.
“It feels like you’re leaving me already. I get it. I understand being with me is a challenge. Don’t think if I had my eyesight back, it would be different. I’ve always been a challenge.”
“It's not that. I told you already; I'm a bad bet. I'm oblivious when it comes to the needs of others, and I have a hundred-percent failure rate making sure people are cared for.”
One Hundred Glances (An Aspen Cove Small Town Romance Book 14) Page 10
