Saul cleared his throat. He suddenly appeared shy and unsure of himself—not an impression Anne had ever had of him. When he let out a long sigh, his bluster and pride seemed to deflate like a pricked balloon. “I’ll forgive you if—”
“If?” she blurted.
“—if you’ll forgive me, wife,” he continued in a whisper. “I’ve treated you—and this whole situation surrounding your daughter—badly. I’m sorry, Anne. I’ll try to do better—I will do better—if you’ll give me the chance.” He smiled hopefully, turning her in his arms. “I want tomorrow to be the best—the first—Mother’s Day you’ve ever celebrated, because you’re finally with your child and—and our grandchild.”
Anne put her fist to her mouth so she wouldn’t cry out—or just cry. “Of course I forgive you, dear,” she murmured. “All you had to do was ask. And I’m sorry about your . . . inability to make babies. Not that it changes my love for you after all this time.”
When Saul pulled her close, she felt intense relief and comfort—and joy. The rift between them these past few days had made her ache with loneliness; their separation had driven such an emotional wedge between them. Joel Lapp had claimed her heart when she was young, but Saul had given her a lifetime of love that could withstand the trials and tribulations of marriage.
Saul kissed her tenderly, thoroughly, before he embraced her again. “I feel like yanking those pins out of your hair,” he said in a husky voice. “But I suppose Mother will wonder why we’re not in the kitchen for breakfast.”
Three firm knocks on the wall made them both laugh out loud.
Saul let Anne finish putting up her hair and they went downstairs together, hand in hand. Forgiveness flowed between them like the maple syrup they poured on their pancakes half an hour later—pancakes Martha Maude made with a satisfied smile on her face.
Chapter 33
When Matthias steered the buggy into the Hartzlers’ long lane midmorning on Sunday, Rose’s heart thrummed. Puffy white clouds drifted across an incredibly blue sky, Saul’s glossy black cattle grazed peacefully in the rolling pasture, and the idyllic scene reminded her of the dream scenario set on her home farm in Cedar Creek—except this vision was real and in the present moment.
It’s time to sell that poor old place, her thoughts whispered. You can’t go back to the perfection of your childhood, so you must move forward. Move on.
“Ah, now I see what’s smelling so gut,” Matthias said as he pulled the rig into the shade of the barn. “Saul’s grilling out back of the house. Why don’t you girls go on inside? I’ll tend the horse and chat with him a bit.”
“Never hurts to be on the cook’s gut side,” Rose teased. When Matthias had helped her down, she glanced toward the grill. “Saul’s smiling at us, too. That’s a gut sign.”
“We’ll believe the best and go from there.” Matthias set Gracie on the ground and gave Rose a quick kiss. “I’m sure your mother and Martha Maude will fill you in on all the details.”
“Mamma, quit kissin’!” Gracie cried. “We gotta give ’em these cards!”
As her daughter raced up the hill toward the house, Rose laughed—until Matthias pulled her into his arms for a longer, sweeter kiss behind the rig. “I hope you’ll have a wonderful time today,” he whispered. “Happy Mother’s Day, Rose.”
She stood on tiptoe to plant a final kiss on his cheek above his wavy, brown beard. “Denki, Matthias. I’m glad to be spending it with my mother, jah, but with you as well.”
Was there a special light in his eyes as he smiled at her? Rose strode up the hill toward the porch, where her mother and Martha Maude were making a fuss over Gracie as she handed them their cards. When she waved at Saul, he waved back without a moment’s hesitation and a big smile on his face. She wasn’t surprised that he had a large, fancy grill with a curved top that came down over the meat.
“Gracie, you look gorgeous in green!” Martha Maude was saying. “And I will treasure this card always, honey, because you made it just for me.”
“Jah, it’s mighty special to be getting my first Mother’s Day card from you, Gracie,” Anne said as she hugged the little girl. “And you know what? We made a special flower-shaped cake for dessert, and we want you to decorate it.”
Gracie’s expression touched Rose deeply. What a joy it was to watch her daughter basking in the glory of a grandmother and great-grandmother, who already cherished her. Anne turned to smile at Rose. “It’s a blessing to have you here today, daughter,” she said with a hitch in her voice. “We have so much to catch up on, and it’s the perfect day to start.”
As Rose returned her mother’s embrace, she knew immediately that the rift between her and Saul had been mended. Anne looked fresh and rested. Her face was glowing beneath her white kapp; her freckled complexion set off by her dress of robin’s egg blue. “So all is well now?” Rose whispered as she reached over to share a hug with Martha Maude.
“Jah—and can you believe it?” Anne replied with a chuckle. “Saul offered to grill our dinner. He said only our best, biggest beef brisket would do. He marinated it overnight and put it on the grill this morning so it would turn out just right for our special guests.”
“He’s a much happier man than when you last saw him,” Martha Maude remarked as they entered the house together. “I’m thinking Gracie’s bluebird of happiness picture turned him around. What a blessing she is.”
Gracie pivoted to smile at the three of them. “Jah, I’m a little angel,” she said sweetly. “What else are we havin’ for dinner?”
Rose entered the kitchen with them and once again realized how large and clean and perfect it appeared—as though nothing ever got spilled and no one ever cluttered the countertops with dirty dishes and the week’s mail.
“We have corn casserole and fresh glazed carrots from the garden,” Martha Maude replied. She pulled a chair up to the end of the table so Gracie could reach the cake, which sat on a pedestal plate. “And we have a red gelatin salad with fruit cocktail, and creamed peas—”
“Yay!” Gracie crowed, clapping her hands. “And we have this pretty pink flower cake, too. What do I do?”
Anne came to Gracie’s other side with a pastry bag filled with frosting. “Here’s how you hold it,” she said, placing the little girl’s hands on the bag, “and when you squeeze where the bag is twisted shut—”
“Dark pink frosting comes out!” Gracie finished gleefully. “Let’s make lines so the flower has petals.”
Rose’s heart filled to overflowing, watching the two women as they guided Gracie’s little hands and encouraged her. With their help, she drew the petal outlines and then began filling the flower’s center with pink dots. As the men came in the back door, their laughter filled the kitchen—a good sign that the two of them seemed to be on the best of terms again.
Saul set his covered pan on the back of the stove and came to stand behind Gracie as she finished decorating the cake. “Look at that! I thought we were having plain old cake, but you made it really pretty, Gracie.”
Gracie giggled. “It’s pink, so it’s a girl cake. You don’t get any.”
“Awww.” Saul leaned down so his face was even with hers, and whispered, “Can your dawdi have a kiss today?”
Rose held her breath. Anne and Martha Maude stepped aside, and Matthias came over to slip his arm around Rose’s shoulders.
Gracie held Saul’s gaze for a long moment as everyone around the pair held their breath. She quickly pecked his cheek and went back to squeezing frosting dots on the cake.
Saul’s face turned a delicate pink, and Rose thought he might cry. “I’ve got a surprise for you after dinner,” he murmured. “Do you feel like a princess today?”
Gracie paused in her decorating, eyeing him. “Whadaya mean?”
“You’ll see,” he said as he bussed her cheek. “Maybe your mamma and Matthias will want to go along, too—but you get the special seat. On top.”
Gracie’s eyes widened with wonder. “Jah, I c
an be a princess,” she said, nodding emphatically. “Let’s eat now! I’m done with this cake.”
Rose chuckled and helped her mother and Martha Maude take the glass casseroles from the oven. Saul began to slice the brisket while Matthias brought some thick books from the front room to stack in Gracie’s chair. Soon they were all seated and praying, in a kitchen warm with good food and goodwill.
What a wonderful meal they shared, and what a blessed day it was for Rose to feel like part of a family again, after losing so many people she’d loved in the past year. The brisket was seasoned and cooked to perfection, and each of the vegetables Anne and Martha Maude had prepared tasted especially fresh and tender. The roll basket went around a second time, as did the platter of brisket and all the side dishes. Gracie waited eagerly in her elevated seat for the grown-ups to finish the main meal.
Saul looked around the table to see that everyone was done eating. “We decided to do our little surprise for Gracie now, and have our cake and coffee when we get back,” he announced.
Rose shared a smile with her mother and Martha Maude. “Does this mean the men are backing out on washing the dishes?” she teased. “We can wait until they’ve finished cleaning up—”
“Nuh-uh!” Gracie blurted. Then she flashed her best smile at Saul. “Dawdi says I getta be a princess, so we gotta go now. And Dawdi’s in charge.”
“Right you are, little girl!” Saul said as he rose from his chair. “I think we should let Matthias and your mamma come, too. Is that okay?”
Gracie scrambled down from her chair, nodding excitedly.
As Rose got up, she leaned over her mother’s shoulder. “I’ll help you with those dishes when we get back. It was such a wonderful meal—”
“We’re so happy to see Saul wrapped around Gracie’s little finger! We’ll gladly do the dishes,” Martha Maude said, waving her off. “You kids go have a gut time. It’s a special day and we should enjoy every minute of it.”
* * *
Matthias reveled in the feeling of Rose’s sturdy hand clasping his as they sat in the backseat of Saul’s enclosed rig. He had an inkling of what Gracie’s surprise was to be—and he felt gratified to be included in it. When Saul drove around behind the large metal building that housed his carriage shop, Gracie leaned forward to gaze out the windshield.
“Where we goin’, Dawdi?” she murmured.
Saul smiled as he pulled Dandy, his chestnut gelding, to a halt. “This is my shop, where we make carriages and rigs, Gracie. Most of the buggies are like this one, but your dawdi also makes some very special princess buggies,” he explained as he opened the door. Then he shook his head, teasing her. “But you probably don’t want to see them, much less ride in one, so maybe—”
“We’re goin’!” Gracie said, scooting toward the door. “I wanna see ’em and ride in ’em!”
When Saul opened the back door of his shop, Gracie raced in ahead of him. He smiled at Matthias. “You saw these coaches earlier, but with all the lights working—all the bells and whistles up and running—they’re really something, if I say so myself,” he said. “The wedding wagon is already shipped off—”
“It’s a big ole punkin!” Gracie cried out from inside the shop. “And there’s a pink princess one, too!”
Matthias laughed. The wonder on Gracie’s face—and in Rose’s eyes—made him even more grateful that Saul had reinstated his partnership when they’d been on the back porch. It was good to watch Saul leaning down to ask Gracie which carriage she wanted to ride—and even better to hear his laughter ringing in the shop when she wanted to ride both of them.
“I think we can arrange that,” Saul told her as he slid a wide door open. “We’ll hitch the pumpkin to Dandy and try that one first. You’re really helping me out, Gracie, because I need to drive these carriages on the road to be sure everything’s working. Watch this.”
When Saul reached up to the coach’s console and flipped a switch, tiny orange and yellow lights began to flash, racing around the wooden wheels and the windows, and twinkling around the coach on the grid of tiny wires surrounding it.
Gracie clapped her hands, beside herself with joy. “Oh, Dawdi!” she cried.
Saul’s face shone even more brightly than the sparkling pumpkin. “We can see the lights better in here than we can out in the daylight,” he explained. “Let’s get you settled up on the driver’s seat—and your mamm and Matthias can ride inside.”
Matthias felt a thrill of gooseflesh as he put down the metal steps and let Rose precede him into the coach. The seats were upholstered in deep orange leather, nicely padded—and he was delighted when Rose patted the place beside her.
“What a surprise,” she murmured as she gazed at the coach’s luxurious interior. A few moments later, when the vehicle lurched and rolled out of the shop, she scooted closer to him. “All’s well between you and Saul, I take it?” she whispered.
“Jah,” Matthias replied as he slipped his arm around her. “Luckily, Martha Maude had a copy of the original contract, so she wrote it out again and we’ll sign it this afternoon. She gave her son quite an earful, by the sound of it—but Saul had already realized he’d let an angry moment get the best of him when he tore up our agreement.”
Rose nodded. “He seems much happier today. Totally absorbed in fussing over Gracie.”
Matthias smiled. “That allows me to be totally absorbed in her mamma. How has your weekend been, staying in Morning Star rather than driving back to Cedar Creek?”
As they rolled down the road past the Hartzler place, Rose’s expression suggested that she had many things on her mind. She rested her head on his shoulder before she replied. “I’ve had a vivid dream these past few nights, and I think I’ve finally figured out what it means,” she said in a faraway voice. “I saw my mamm and dat—both of them looking young and healthy—and so happy to be my parents,” she added with a hitch in her voice.
Matthias hugged her shoulders. “Jah, I still dream of my folks every now and again, too. And they look much better than when they passed—although Mamm wasn’t old or sick. She died in a buggy crash.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” Rose murmured, touching her fingertips to his cheek. “This dream woke me up to a couple of important things. First, I realized that my parents were the best I could’ve ever had, even if I wasn’t born to them.”
Nodding, Matthias gazed into her eyes. “I can’t imagine what a shock that must’ve been, to find out that the two people you loved and trusted most in this world had kept a very important secret about you.”
“But it worked out for the gut,” Rose insisted, “and I’m blessed now to be with my birth mother again—to belong to a whole new family.”
For a few moments, they glanced out the coach’s open windows. They heard Saul regaling Gracie with descriptions of the places they were passing in the countryside, and Rose’s expression became more purposeful. As the coach turned up a side road that would return them to town, her gaze made Matthias go very still.
“Will you help me get the Cedar Creek farm ready to sell?” she asked in an urgent whisper. “In my dream, the house and the gardens were perfect and well-tended, as they were when I was a child—and I’ll never be able to keep the place up, much less get it into such gut shape again.”
Matthias’s eyes widened. “This is an awfully big step, Rose. Are you sure you’re ready to be rid of the place where you’ve spent most of your life?” he asked quietly. He was quivering inside, wondering if this thread of conversation would possibly tie in with his own desires. “Where will you live?”
Rose blinked when the carriage began backing up. They were at the carriage shop again, and when Dandy had positioned the pumpkin coach where Saul wanted it, the big man jumped down from the driver’s seat.
“Everybody out!” he cried, grinning at them through the window. “Princess Gracie says we’re taking the pink coach for a spin now. Hope I’m not interrupting anything,” he teased.
Matthias hopped o
ut of the coach and then lifted Rose and set her on the shop floor. He helped Saul unhitch the beautiful chestnut gelding from the pumpkin coach, and then the two of them tugged the pink coach with the white wrought-iron curlicues into hitching position.
“How was the ride in the driver’s seat?” Rose asked her little girl.
Matthias paused to take in the sight of mother and daughter as they gazed happily at each other. More than ever, he hoped to take them into his home soon, as they already held a place in his heart.
“We saw Dawdi’s cows, and the creek at the bottom of his hill, and everything!” Gracie exclaimed. “It was so much funner than ridin’ inside!”
“And Saul tied your strings so your kapp wouldn’t fly off?” Rose asked, tugging on the neat bow beneath Gracie’s chin.
“Jah. It was fun feelin’ the wind in my face!”
“Ready, Gracie?” Saul asked. He reached up and flipped on the lights, which twinkled with a soft white glow all around the elaborate pink coach.
“Oooh! That’s really pretty.” Gracie’s mouth dropped open as she took in the wondrous sight.
Saul extended his hands and Gracie rushed into them, giggling when he held her up over his head. After he carefully set her on the driver’s seat, he looked at Matthias and Rose. “Ready for another spin? We’ll go a different way this time—”
“A longer way!” Gracie put in. “Please, Dawdi? Pretty please with sugar on top?”
Saul’s sparkling eyes rivaled the lights on the carriage. “The princess has spoken,” he murmured. “Hope you don’t mind riding around with us.”
“It’s fun to see how these fancy rigs turned out,” Matthias put in. “Don’t worry about us—we’ll be your quality control inspectors for the interior.”
When he and Rose were settled inside the pink coach, the horse took off at a trot. The carriage was obviously geared toward little girls, because everything was bright pink leather, trimmed with white, and a grid of tiny white lights flickered on the ceiling. Like the pumpkin coach, this vehicle’s windows had no glass, so the sunshine and breeze came in freely.
A Mother's Love Page 26
