Half day? I didn’t think so.
I’d never admit it to Lincoln, but I was tired. My head throbbed, and I’d give anything for a sleeping mask and his comfy bed.
I drummed the pencil on my clipboard. When I didn’t feel well, usually I craved my own bed. The thought of it wasn’t nearly as appealing.
Do you think after one night, you’re moving in?
No. I just . . . liked being in his space. With him.
I had no business rocket-shipping a relationship, but with him it was so natural, any other way seemed odd.
“Are you doing that tonight?” Lincoln asked.
Huh? Oh, the ice cream.
“We probably won’t have time after we make the batch of dog food. Maybe tomorrow though.” We could all use a big bowl of homemade ice cream.
Lincoln’s jaw set as he stared at the road ahead. Unlike when I’d tried to get him to turn over in the back of the van, he was careful with each maneuver.
“Did I say something that displeases you, sir?”
Lincoln had done more than support me the past few days. He’d lifted some of the weight I carried. Driving to the deliveries wasn’t always exactly stressful . . . but it was nice to kick back for a day.
The only problem was that I’d unloaded more responsibility on him when he needed a break more than I did.
He just didn’t realize it. And if I hadn’t hit my head and been forced to stop for a minute, I wouldn’t have seen that I did either.
“You should rest.”
Eric turned around in his seat. “Are you sick?”
Discreetly, I poked Lincoln in the back of the driver’s seat with my elbow.
“Nah. But hasn’t it been nice having a chauffeur?” It was a pitiful deflection, but necessary.
“Hey! We could hire Lincoln. He’s good with directions.”
I nearly choked. The sweetness of the sentiment tugged at my heart. Eric didn’t know we couldn’t afford to hire anyone else yet. Especially not Lincoln. He’d probably been making money all day, even though he hadn’t been to work.
“Hmmm. I’m not sure he’d pass the interview.”
“He can get better at peeling the carrots,” Eric defended.
I snorted. “This doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that he’ll stop and get donuts whenever you ask, does it?”
Eric shook his head. “But that’s another bonus.”
Had I used that phrase before? Sometimes I wondered where he picked things up. We didn’t watch a lot of TV. There wasn’t time.
“He doesn’t talk much, so that’s another check in the bonus column.”
I snickered as Lincoln’s scowl deepened.
“See. He’s perfect!” Eric said. I shouldn’t have encouraged him, knowing Lincoln wasn’t going to work for us, but we were having fun.
“But he hasn’t passed the real test.” I turned very serious. “Does he know the words to Bobby McGee?”
Slowly, Eric turned to Lincoln. He looked uncertain as he watched him drive a couple of blocks. Then Eric turned up the radio and seemed relieved when the song was in the middle of the piano solo.
“The next part is easy,” he whispered loudly.
Lincoln said nothing, simply stared through the windshield with that rock-like expression.
“It’s almost time,” Eric prompted as the song neared the end of the solo.
“Whooo.”
I whipped my entire body toward Lincoln when he let out a yell in perfect timing with Janis Joplin. Even the dogs lifted their heads.
Eric beamed and gave me an I knew he could do it look.
I’d tried to help Lincoln get out of a job interview, but he belted out the end of the song like it was his favorite. Granted there were only about three or four words, but still. And of course, he was a decent singer.
Eric joined in, and I lifted my hands and sang at the top of my lungs.
It wasn’t so long ago Lincoln had been in the back of the van, scowling while the rest of us sang along to our favorite song. Whether he liked it or not, he’d retained some of the words, but I liked to think he’d loosened up just a little because of us.
“You’re hired!” Eric shouted when the final guitar note played.
My brother and I had done this together, just the two of us, for so long, I’d never thought much about expanding beyond that. It was shortsighted, and I wasn’t afraid to grow. But there was something about this right here that we couldn’t get back if our business got too big.
We had an aggressive schedule, making and delivering dog food every day. But specializing in what our customers wanted was the entire premise of our business.
Dog Love kept us busy, allowed us to spend time together doing something we enjoyed, and provided enough money so that we weren’t under quite so much financial stress. The goal had never been to get rich.
And I still wasn’t sure about a store. In some ways that made more sense. Maybe it would be better. But I liked this. Liked being out and about, singing our favorite song.
I was a little scared of how easily Lincoln fit into that. Easy might not be the right word, but he’d gone from being a robot passenger in the back of the van to driving and singing. I hadn’t thought he was capable, and he was probably surprised himself.
Lincoln had an empire to run, but if he wanted to join us sometimes, I wouldn’t mind.
A record scratch went off in my head. I gripped the clipboard.
I couldn’t be thinking in terms of a future. Not like that, not where it was effortless and without hesitation. That was dangerous territory. Our lives were meant to be taken a day at a time. Barreling ahead and assuming Lincoln would be there was a surefire way to get hurt if he wasn’t.
The “good morning” he’d given me—or almost—hadn’t felt temporary. My face flamed. I’d gotten so carried away, I hadn’t thought. I’d just wanted. Needed.
And that was reckless. Because if we’d taken that step, it was beyond falling. That was willingly giving myself to him. Could I do that?
“Shit for brains. Shit for brains. Shit for brains.”
I bolted to my knees and touched Eric’s thigh as he repeated the phrase over and over.
“Don’t say that,” I whispered as I followed his stare out the window.
Red. Spots of fiery red dotted my vision.
Rage overpowered my underlying fear.
How had he found us again? My father knew where we lived.
Lincoln crept by the building in search of an empty spot. My father’s eyes slowly followed as we passed. The asshole had a white bandage around his head like I’d busted him with a bat instead of a slap.
I wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. He was counting on me doing just that.
I pressed Lincoln’s knee. “Keep driving and don’t come back.”
Chapter Twenty
Lincoln
“I want him gone.”
I pressed the phone so hard into the side of my face it would likely leave a permanent indention.
“What are you proposing?” Daniel asked carefully.
It had taken Lexie a good half hour to get Eric to stop repeating that awful phrase. And when we’d gotten home, she wouldn’t leave her brother’s side, but I managed to get out of her what had happened.
Her father.
I’d seen a man watching as we drove by. The head wound bandage was a nice touch.
What had he been doing at their apartment? Why? Why had he been there? Hadn’t he done enough damage?
I paced in front of the elevators. Eric had taken over my study, and I didn’t mind. But this was a conversation I wanted to have as far away from them as possible. There was no privacy at my house anymore.
I jogged down the steps to the basketball court.
“Something where he disappears and never bothers them again,” I said through my teeth. “Permanently.”
“I’m close by. I’ll come over so we can talk about this in person,” he said far too rationally fo
r my liking.
“No,” I said quickly. Lexie and Eric needed my support. This was my way of doing it at the moment. “It’s not a good time.”
“I follow where you’re going with this request, but are you sure you want a permanent solution?”
In the years we’d known one another, we’d never had a conversation such as this. Then again, I wasn’t quite sure I’d ever been this angry.
Her father had a lot of nerve, I’d give him that.
“I want him back in jail. With zero chance of ever setting foot in the free world again.” I threw a basketball at the wall as hard as I could.
Whack.
The sound reverberated off the space, yet it did nothing to settle my frazzled nerves. I paced up and down the court, my shoes clacking on the polished floor.
“I . . . was concerned for a moment.” Relief was evidence in my friend’s voice.
“Believe me, I want to ask you for that.”
Daniel had close ties to a family well-known for its rule of the New York underworld. He wasn’t involved with them on a day-to-day level, but the head of the family was like a father to him.
I didn’t want to owe the Salvatores anything, but it couldn’t be worse than what would come due to my own father.
What exactly was I asking?
Until this moment, I hadn’t known I was capable of wanting someone dead. I certainly wished Father would disappear . . . but that was different than this.
Donnie Logan was a hardened criminal who had no boundaries. His children were a means to an end of getting what he wanted. What that was, I didn’t know.
I’d just make sure he didn’t get it. Especially after seeing the enormous pain Lexie had been in as she’d held her brother. Calmed him down, even though it was clear her head was in agony. She should be resting. Not dealing with this nonsense her father pulled.
“What happened?”
I laid out the scene from earlier in concise, measured sentences. As I replayed the event and the effect it’d had on Lexie and Eric, my rage boiled to a dangerous level all over again.
“I can’t allow him to terrorize them any longer.” I sank down on the courtside bench. “The rule of law has failed them. I won’t.”
“Just ignore him.”
My brows shot up. Daniel was not a man who “just ignored” anything.
“That’s your solution?”
“You’re upset. Once you’ve calmed, you’ll see I’m right.” His tone was even. I wanted him to sympathize. To be angry along with me.
“I don’t—”
“Have a meal with them. Play cards or go for a walk.” He was casual, yet firm.
“Since when are you a therapist?” I hated his solution. It did nothing to solve the problem.
Donnie would still be out there, ready to blindside Lexie at any moment. She needed security, but I didn’t trust anyone else to do it. I’d have to watch over them myself.
“You’ll thank me later.”
He hung up. Disappointment flooded me. That was not how the conversation was supposed to go. I thought Daniel would be supportive of my quest to take Donnie Logan down for good.
I rubbed the side of my neck.
There was another option.
Was I that desperate again?
Last time I’d asked for my father’s help, I wasn’t certain he’d actually done anything other than bank something I’d owe him later.
This went deeper.
This I’d pay for likely until one of us died. If he did first, I’d probably keep paying.
Daniel was right.
I wanted Lexie and Eric’s father behind bars tonight, but if I could think more rationally, I’d find another way besides my father.
I was no less calm when I entered the apartment than I was when I’d left.
“Lincoln?” Lexie padded toward me, phone in hand. “It’s for you.”
I accepted. Who would contact me on her phone?
“Yes.”
“You’re under investigation. Think before you speak on your phone or in your apartment.” Daniel’s gruff voice fired down the line before it went dead.
At least I hadn’t misjudged my friend. He’d been looking out for me. In my rage, I hadn’t considered the authorities would have my phone and home tapped.
The rational and carefully controlled reactions I prided myself on were nowhere to be found since Lexie had entered my life. I felt reckless. And it was uncomfortable.
But I was alive.
“Is something wrong with your phone?” Lexie pointed to the device in my hand.
“No.” I offered hers back. “How is he?”
“Thank goodness for Millie and Muffy. They’ve brought him back.” The lines of worry that seemed to be carved into her face had deepened in the past few hours.
“And you?” I touched her cheek.
“Furious. Spooked.” She wrinkled her nose. “I’m speaking like you now. One word answers.”
“To the point.” I pulled her close, needing to feel her. “Nothing wrong with that.”
“Can—” she looked up at me with those troubled green eyes. “Can we stay here for a while? I can’t risk—”
“As long as you want.”
The thought of them back at their apartment, regardless of the reason why, brought on another new sensation. It was what I guessed felt like a revolt inside of me.
I didn’t want them to go.
What a turnaround. Not so long ago, I hadn’t wanted them here. They had invaded my space, made it more of a home than it had ever been.
“Thank you.” She kissed my cheek.
Thank you? She didn’t need to thank me for anything. If anyone owed gratitude, it was me to them.
“I think I can drive tomorrow,” she said before I could respond. “My headache isn’t so bad now.”
“The hell you’re getting behind the wheel until you’ve been cleared by a physician.” I wouldn’t put her at unnecessary risk.
“I am not a fan of being told what to do.” Her voice had lost its calm undertone.
“It’s not my order. Or do you not take instruction from medical professionals either?” I clamped my mouth shut. It was the wrong thing to say. Because once again, I couldn’t think clearly when it came to her.
Her hand flew to her hip. “I’ve yet to see or hear the medical opinion that I can’t do anything for a week.”
I pulled out a business card. “Here’s Dr. Sullivan’s number. Call him.”
She stepped away from me. “You have the doctor’s card with you?”
It sounded as if she’d have been less surprised if I’d pulled a snake out of my pocket.
“Of course.” Why wouldn’t I have his contact information readily available? I couldn’t risk her health. And judging by the look on her face, it wasn’t a good idea to mention all of his numbers were stored in my phone too.
She took another step back. It was too much distance.
“You can’t dictate our lives,” she said, lethally quiet.
“You certainly dictate mine.” I hadn’t meant to admit that.
Hurt flashed across her face. “I would never.”
“I can’t think. Can’t control my actions. Speak without thought.”
“How is that my fault?” she cried.
“I don’t make a single move in a day without thinking of you first.”
She deflated. “You can’t say stuff like that.”
“What about I don’t want you to go? Can I say that?” I yanked on my hair. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to hold on to this apartment. It won’t be long before my cash depletes. My assets are frozen. I can’t participate in the business I love. But if I end up on the streets with nothing left, it will be okay as long as you’re with me.”
Her lips parted. She searched my face. The old Lincoln Hollingsworth would’ve never admitted any of those things out loud. I hadn’t thought it through. I’d acted on impulse. Wasn’t there a lot more at stake if I didn’t?
/>
What kind of an offer was that to a woman who deserved the best in this life? She needed stability, something I could’ve given her a few months ago. But then, my heart wasn’t available. Now, it was the most I could guarantee.
“You—you can’t say stuff like that.” This time it was a plea for mercy.
I opened my arms wide. “This is it. This is all I have to give you and Eric. And whether you want it or not, it’s yours.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Lexie
Boom.
I was frozen.
Lincoln had left what felt like a lifetime ago when I’d been too stunned to respond.
You’re an idiot and an ass, Lexie.
He’d bared his soul in a way only he could, and I’d just stood there . . . in complete and total shock. It was the worst reaction in the history of reactions. But if I had a do-over, I had no idea what I’d do differently.
It was too much to take in.
He didn’t want us to go?
He was mine whether I wanted him or not?
Ours. He wanted both me and Eric.
His financial situation—frozen assets and all—meant nothing to me other than he’d worked hard to achieve such success. How difficult it must be facing the possibility of going from this—I glanced around the opulent foyer—to an apartment like ours?
And to think that if he lost everything, he thought he’d be okay as long as we were in his life?
I couldn’t even begin to digest the concept.
Lincoln was the rock for his family . . . and lately for me.
He didn’t need anyone, but it wasn’t just his words that had me stuck in place. It was the way he said them. The rawness, the openness, the unadulterated truth in them.
It was as if he’d ripped his soul open and showed me what it looked like.
I slid down the wall until I hit the floor.
It was too much. I’d been blinded by his inner beauty . . . his honesty.
One second, he’d been bossing me about and the next handing me all the power. Because though he hadn’t said it, I had the choice to stay or go. He’d laid out everything and left what happened next completely up to me.
Fall: Rise & Fall Duet Book 2 (Shaken 4) Page 9
