by Lois Richer
Bu there was no need. Zac didn’t argue.
“We’re going to see the kittens in the barn now,” he explained, a battered gray Stetson tilted back on his head. “Wanna come?”
“It’s Dad’s Day. You go with your daughters. I’m going to sit here and enjoy the sun.” She watched them leave with a bittersweet longing.
She loved looking at Zac, loved the way his hair flopped over one twinkling eye, just visible through his dark glasses. She loved the way he always brushed it and other distractions off to focus on whomever he was talking to. She loved...
Wait a minute—loved?
Yes, Abby acknowledged to herself, astonished and yet overjoyed by the thought. She loved Zac. He was such a decent, honorable man. Being here on the ranch, being near Zac, watching him interact with his beloved family, enjoying their moments together—all of that only enhanced her budding feelings for this man who still struggled to trust God. Here at the Double H Ranch she’d found freedom, especially because of Zac’s unconditional acceptance of her.
But Abby was still tortured by reminders of Ken’s about-face after he’d learned of the insurance. She’d loved her husband. She’d thought he loved her. But she’d been fooled. Ken had only loved what she could do for him. So even if Zac was interested in her, and she wasn’t at all sure he was, Abby was afraid to risk love again. Even for a man who was as special as Zac Calhoun.
And yet, Abby had witnessed great marriages during her stay at Hanging Hearts Ranch. Zac’s parents, Drew and Mandy and several local church couples exemplified unions with mutual respect and mutual goals, marriage the way God intended.
“Why are you sitting here?” Miss Partridge asked, breaking into her reverie.
“Hello. The girls were learning to ride and I watched,” Abby explained, slightly embarrassed that she hadn’t even heard the woman’s approach. “I stayed put to enjoy the sunshine. How are you?”
“Wishing you and Zac would find me someone. There’s a cruise to Alaska I really want to take.” She grimaced. “But it’s no fun to go alone.”
“No, that wouldn’t be nearly as interesting,” Abby agreed as she climbed down off the fence. “Would you like some coffee?”
“I’d rather go sit in Peace Meadow and talk to you.” Miss Partridge wore a determined look on her face that said she would not be swayed.
“Sure. Let’s go.” Uncertain as to what this was about, Abby waited until they were sitting in the meadow before she opened her mouth. Miss Partridge beat her to it.
“I hear you’re leaving.”
“What?” Startled, she gaped at the older woman. “Who said that? Well, I mean I will be leaving soon now that Zac’s recovered partial sight, but not for a bit...”
“I’m really disappointed to hear that.” Miss Partridge thrust out her legs and peered at her walking shoes. “Extremely disappointed.”
“Really?” Abby blinked. “But, Miss P., you know that I always intended to leave when he regained his sight.”
“You’re leaving even though you love him?” The woman’s clear blue eyes dared her to refute it.
Embarrassed and in shock, Abby remained silent, staring at her knotted fingers. Why had she come to the meadow? Now that she was virtually alone with Miss P., there would be no stopping her questioning and probing.
“You don’t have to worry. I doubt anyone else realizes the depth of your feelings for Zac.” Had she ever heard this woman sound so tender, so loving? “I noticed because I’ve seen how changed you are around him. I’ve been praying for Zachary to find another partner since the day Bonnie told me Maria had died.”
“You have? Why?” Abby asked curiously.
“Because I pray for all the Calhoun boys,” she explained with a shrug. “I felt like we all—the entire town of Sunshine—adopted them after their birth parents were killed in that car accident and Ben and Bonnie brought them to Hanging Hearts Ranch. I’ve watched and prayed over them through school and beyond, like an aunt. Because the three of them are special men and I believe God has plans to use them.”
“That’s wonderful that you’re so committed to them.” Admiration swept over Abby. “I once had an African woman, a very dear friend, who prayed for me. Her prayers were the reason I got through—” She choked up and couldn’t actually finish.
“She got you through the abuse from your husband.” Miss P. nodded. “It must have been wonderful to know that you had someone holding you up before God when things were at their worst.”
“How did you know about the...abuse?” she asked, aghast.
“The way you never spoke of your husband without a tenseness in your voice and your body language. Little things I’ve seen, like the way you used to shy away from touch.” Miss P. smiled and shrugged. “I spent a week of my yearly holidays from the library helping out at a women’s shelter in the city. You learn to recognize when a woman has been abused. Mental abuse is, I often think, the most difficult to recover from. Bodies heal, but once damaged, self-confidence is very hard to rebuild. I’m guessing that’s what you endured. But you seem to be regaining yours since you’ve come to the Double H.”
“Maybe, but I still feel guilty for not making it work with Ken,” Abby murmured. “I tried to be what he needed, but there were barriers between us that I couldn’t break down.”
“Your insurance money,” the senior said with a nod.
“How do you—?”
“I did an online search and found out some things. Librarians know how to search,” she said with a smug smile. “I didn’t want to poke into your personal life, dear. I just wanted to protect my boys.”
Her boys. Never had Abby heard such pride as she did in this woman’s voice.
“So you know all about me?” she whispered, wincing inwardly.
“I know your parents died and you received a settlement because of the way they died. A crooked politician, wasn’t it? Trying to cover up his drunk driving?” She shook her head. “Be sure your sin will find you out, the Bible says.”
“His didn’t,” Abby muttered.
“It will.” Miss P.’s jaw thrust out. “I also read that you’d lost your little son and Ken in a horrific accident. I’m so sorry, Abby. That’s such a difficult loss.” Long fingers gripped her hand and squeezed sympathetically.
“Thank you. Ken took a lot of chances when he flew. That day he was so angry with me that he took too many.” She shook off the memories.
“But Zac is nothing like your husband was. Zac wouldn’t hurt anyone knowingly,” Miss P. insisted.
“I know that. Zac doesn’t have a desperate need to prove himself. He’s giving and kind, always ready to listen. He doesn’t have a self-centered bone in his body.”
“But you don’t want to give him a chance?” Miss P. interjected with her brows drawn together as if she couldn’t understand that.
“Let’s say once burned, twice shy.” Abby heaved a heavy sigh, wondering why it was so easy to talk to this friend. “I’m scared to trust myself when it comes to love. I’m scared I’ll fail again. I loved Ken, but I don’t believe he loved me. That was pretense.”
“His pretense,” the lady said indignantly. “Not yours.”
“Yes, but still, I loved the wrong man. That love made me weak and my weakness cost me Levi.” She burst into hot, hurting tears. “I can’t risk loving and losing again. It would kill me.”
“No, dear. You are strong, much stronger than you think.” Miss P. crouched beside her chair, her arm around Abby’s shoulders. “And you have God on your side, loving you, supporting you. Protecting you. Preparing a future for you.”
“My future isn’t with Zac or the twins,” Abby whispered. “Not at Hanging Hearts Ranch.”
“Why do you think that?” Miss P. stared at the horizon as if mesmerized.
“Because if we did get involved and I messed up, it wo
uld hurt so many people, especially the twins. How would they ever understand if I left? They wouldn’t. They’d just have to deal with another loss.” She gulped. “His parents would be shamed in the community they love. Mandy and Drew and Ella would all have their lives disrupted.” She swallowed hard. “It couldn’t work.”
“Do you want it to?” her friend demanded.
“Yes,” Abby admitted. “But that’s not the most important consideration.”
“Yes, dear, it is. It is the only consideration. Do you know how much I long to find love, to share love, to be loved?” Tears pooled as Miss P. smiled. “Love is God’s greatest gift. Love can work wonders, in us and around us. My dear, with God all things are possible.”
“But—”
“Why don’t you and I spend some time here talking to Him about you and Zac,” Miss P. suggested. “I’m sure He’s already got a plan for both of you to share His blessings.”
“Zac doesn’t love me,” Abby insisted.
A very odd smile stretched across Miss Partridge’s face. Then the lady bowed her head and began talking to God.
* * *
Meet me in Peace Meadow.
Zac was rather perplexed by the text. Abby had disappeared for most of the afternoon, which he and the twins had spent with Ben. Now his mom and dad had gone to a seniors’ dinner in town. Since Mandy and Ella were taking Drew out for a Father’s Day dinner, Zac needed to fetch his twins and think about what to make them for supper.
Where had his nurse been this afternoon?
The twins are with me, a second text declared.
“What on earth is going on?” Zac wasted a few minutes puzzling over it before deciding he might as well find out. He shrugged into a sweater, walked down the steps and grabbed the end of the rope that would lead him to Peace Meadow. He could see well enough without it, but the uneven ground sometimes tripped him up. Abby’s knots in the rope helped with that.
It wouldn’t get dark for hours yet, but the waning sun created leafy patterns on the ground where it shone through the leaves. Zac peered through his glasses, recognizing the outlines of buildings around the ranch. Would his eyesight ever get clearer, or was this blurry-around-the-edges view the best he could hope for?
And if it was, what kind of a future could he have? The mission society wouldn’t want to re-sponsor him, especially with diminished sight, when they’d barely agreed to him staying after Maria’s death. So what would he do? And where would he do it?
Zac couldn’t figure that out. But neither could he imagine a future that didn’t include Abby. Her earlier remark about leaving had stuck with him, rolling around and around in his head, reminding him he’d soon be on his own. Life without Abby would be very different. She was the type of person he called a cheerleader, always there with an encouraging word, teaching the girls through her actions how to be kind.
Abby intuitively saw needs others missed and stepped in to fill them. Now that his parents were healing and past the critical stage, outside help from the community had waned, probably at their insistence. It was Abby who checked that his mom and dad had nutritious meals ready to eat when they were too tired or sore to cook. It was Abby who, with Miss Partridge’s help, had organized the church ladies to take over the spring housecleaning because his mom couldn’t manage it. It was Abby who nudged Zac to make it more of a habit to stop by his parents’ home at different times each day, just to visit or share a coffee or chat.
No matter what her task, Abby always wore her uplifting smile that cheered everyone just by its very appearance. What would his life be like without her gorgeous grin?
He learned more about Abby every day. Today, for instance, he’d heard her playing his father’s favorite hymn on his parents’ piano. He had no idea she could play, let alone sing, and yet her voice was amazing. To Zac, it seemed the only thing Abby couldn’t do was find Miss Partridge someone to love.
Because he wasn’t concentrating on where he was going, Zac suddenly found himself in the meadow, assailed by two squeaky voices wishing him a happy Father’s Day. Zoe and Mia grinned with delight while he gaped at the array before him.
“Thank you, girls. That was very nice.” He received their enthusiastic hugs and kisses, then glanced at Abby. “What’s going on?”
“We’re having a wiener roast, Daddy,” Zoe proclaimed.
“For your Daddy’s Day party.” Mia joined her sister in dancing around him with excitement. “An’ we got presents an’—ow!” She looked at her sister angrily.
“Not s’posed to tell, dummy,” Zoe said.
“Girls. That’s not the way we act, on Father’s Day or any other time,” Abby admonished very quietly.
“Sorry, Daddy,” the twins said together with sad faces, then ruined their contrition by giggling.
“A nice party from my beautiful twins. Thank you. And Abby lit a fire?” Zac studied her. “Is there no end to your talents?”
“I’ll have you know I lit a fire in my African stove almost every day, Zachary,” Abby chided briskly. “It’s hardly a talent.”
“For some people it is. Ask Mandy.” He sat down in the chair the twins indicated, the one with colorful balloons tied to the back that bobbled in the wind. “What now? Oh.” He leaned over to allow them to put a paper crown on his head. “Let the party begin,” he declared, thrilled that she’d gone to all this work and engaged the girls in it, just for him.
“We’re cookin’ your supper tonight, Daddy,” Zoe informed him.
“Yeah. Cookin’. Oops.” Mia peered sadly at the hot dog that had just fallen into the fire.
“Let’s try that again,” Abby said cheerfully, and threaded a second wiener onto Mia’s long cooking fork.
“Abby calls that a do-over, Daddy,” Zoe explained in typical big-sister form.
“They’re just so cute,” Abby said almost under her breath as she sat down beside him.
“They take after their father,” he informed her smugly.
“Hmm.” She appraised him thoughtfully as the warm breeze whispered across the meadow.
Zac found he couldn’t look away from her. What was it about Abby that captivated him?
“Well, you’re cute,” she murmured, her smile playful. “And you’re their father, so I guess they do take after you.”
She thought he was cute, huh? Even with bad eyes and these dark glasses? A quiet sense of satisfaction settled inside him. Once the hot dogs had been devoured, Zac pretended to rise.
“Guess we’d better get going home.”
“No, Daddy!” Zoe yelled, seizing his hands and hanging on. “Wait.”
“Wait? Why?” He pretended to frown.
“’Cause we got ’nother s’prise,” Mia explained.
“Another? Well, what could that be?” He sat down and managed to look suitably impressed when they opened a big plastic carrier and lifted out a large flat cake.
“It’s choc’late, like you like best,” Zoe explained.
“It looks delish.” He tipped his head to study them. “You girls made it? For me?”
“Uh-huh.” Zoe grinned. “An’ Abby helped.”
“When did you do this?” he asked, directing his question at Abby.
“Yesterday, when you were here, talking to that man.” Mia used a plastic knife to cut a huge piece. “This is mine.”
Abby cleared her throat.
Mia hesitated before revising.
“It’s my piece for Daddy, ’cause it’s Daddy’s Day an’ at Sunday School Teacher tol’ us we’re s’posed to be nice to you.”
“Didn’t she say you’re supposed to be nice to me all the time?” Zac asked innocently.
“Yeah.” Zoe shrugged. “We’ll try.”
Zac noticed Abby turn away to cough. He had to fight to keep a straight face, too. They enjoyed their cake and when it was gone, Abby g
ave them each a balsa wood plane to fly. Hers crashed first. Zac deliberately sent his to the same fate so the girls could keep playing while he and Abby talked.
“Thank you. For everything. This was very thoughtful of you to arrange.” He sat next to her.
“I used to do stuff like this with my dad on Father’s Day. Fun things like flying little planes or kites I gave him. I miss him.” For a moment, a wistful expression fluttered through her incredible eyes, dimming them.
“And with Ken,” he added, not wanting to dwell on that image.
“No, Ken was away—” She stopped short, voice quavering. After a moment she began again. “Levi just had one Father’s Day, but his daddy wasn’t there. He was flying.” She shook her head as tears coursed down her lovely face.
“I’m so sorry, Abby.” He covered her hand with his, silently sympathizing as he waited for her to regain her composure. Her strong capable fingers rested in his, reminding him of her strength and how seldom she let anyone see any weakness beneath her mantle of capability. This woman gave and gave, but rarely asked or even looked as if she needed comforting.
“Daddy?”
“Yes, Zoe?” Zac blinked, surprised to realize both his daughters were staring at his hand on Abby’s.
“How come you’re holding Abby’s hand? Are you gonna kiss her, too?” Mia asked curiously.
“What? I don’t—who said—why are you asking this?” he demanded, yanking his hand away.
“’Cause Ella said that’s how her mom and dad got married. First they hanged on to the other person’s hand and then they kissed,” Mia said.
“An’ then they got married.” Zoe’s eyes glowed with excitement. “Are you an’ Abby getting married? Is she gonna be our mom?”
Surprised by the intense appeal of their idea, Zac glanced at Abby, who now stared at the twins as if they’d dropped from Mars. After a moment her head swiveled and she looked at him, her beautiful eyes stretched wide.
That’s when Zac knew he did want to kiss her. Thoroughly. But not here, and certainly not with the twins watching.
