by Ryan Casey
I walked into the darkness, away from my home.
I didn’t know what time it was, only that it was night. The rain had stopped falling now, but I was still soaked. Not that I cared. I didn’t care how I felt. I didn’t care about anything.
All I cared about—all I’d been making this journey for—had burned down.
All I cared about was gone.
I walked into the trees. Again, I didn’t know where I was exactly. I just needed to be somewhere away from… well, from everything. The only sounds were my footsteps breaking the fallen branches underfoot. In my mouth, the lingering taste of sick, as the memory of what I’d encountered replayed over and over again.
I’d found my way home.
I’d beaten all the odds, everything standing in my way, and I’d found my way home.
But home hadn’t beaten the odds.
Home wasn’t waiting for me.
My family wasn’t waiting for me.
So what did I have left?
I thought about that burning house and my stomach turned once again. Bobby was so afraid of fire. He’d always been scared of it, right from when he was just a toddler. It was a good thing, of course. Good to know he wouldn’t accidentally stick his hand in it as a kid or anything like that.
But the thought of his little face when he saw those flames…
I felt tears building up in my eyes and I shook my head. I couldn’t allow myself to think that way. I just couldn’t.
I fell down beside a tree and leaned back against it. I stared up at the sky, which was filled with stars. The dampness of my clothes was having an effect now, making me feel colder than I knew it was.
If I sat here and stared up at the stars, I could pretend I was on a camping holiday. I could pretend everything was normal. I could find a way to be at peace.
But not for long,
Not for long without remembering what had happened.
What I’d lost.
I thought about Suzy and Will, wherever they were. I’d walked away from them. Left them behind when they weren’t looking. I felt guilty about that, of course I did. But honestly, they were better off without me. I’d tried the whole trusting people thing. I’d tried the whole “seeing the best in others.”
And where had that got me?
It’d got me to a place where my animals were dead, where my home was in flames, where my family was gone.
They’d find their own way, one way or another. They’d find a way to pull themselves through in this world. But it wasn’t going to involve me. It wasn’t…
I heard footsteps wading their way through the trees.
I gripped on to the handgun. I wasn’t afraid to use it. I wanted to be alone. I wanted my peace. And I’d get it. I’d get it.
I listened to those footsteps get closer and I lifted it and pointed it in the direction they were coming from, right ahead of me.
But then when I saw who it was, my hand shook and I lowered the gun.
It was Suzy. Will was by her side.
She had the torch in her hand. It was shining up against her face. She didn’t look happy.
“You having fun out here?” she asked.
I heard the venom in her voice and my guilt at leaving her and her son grew. “I’m sorry,” I said.
“Sorry isn’t enough,” she said. “I gave up a lot for you. I could’ve stayed with Peter. My son could’ve stayed with Peter. Don’t forget that.”
There was nothing else I could say. “You should’ve stayed with him. There’s nothing for you here.”
“Oh stop being so self-pitying. And for God’s sakes, stop being so selfish.”
Her words hit me like a spike to the chest. “Selfish?”
“Yes. Selfish. Your home is burning, yeah. Your animals are gone, sure. But that’s not an excuse to just give up on your family.”
“So what do you suggest I do?”
“I suggest you get searching for them. Don’t tell me you came all this way to just give up on them, hmm?”
I heard what Suzy was saying and somehow it resonated with me. I was being selfish. I’d been chasing this idea of home, of self-sufficiency and of normality, so much so that when I’d returned to find the home in tatters, I’d given up.
But I couldn’t give up.
Not when the people who had burned my home and killed my animals were out there somewhere.
And not while they might know where my wife and son were.
“You need to get up. You need to face up to reality, just like I did when I decided to come with you. I believed in you because you helped me. I saw the goodness in you, and what people could do when they banded together. Don’t just give up on that because of one setback. Because if you do, then how can you ever hope to survive in this world?”
The words hit me. They spoke to me. I felt like I was waking up to the truth, and for the first time since my discovery of the house, I could see clearly.
I stood up. I took a deep breath. I walked over to Suzy, to Will, and I looked them both in the eye.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “For what I did. For walking away. Really. I see what I did now. I was lost. I was grieving. But… but now I’ve seen what I have to do. Now I’ve seen what has to happen next.”
A half-smile on Suzy’s face. “And what’s that?”
I turned around and faced the trees. “I’m going to find my wife. I’m going to find my son. And we’re going to find a new home. No matter what it takes.”
Chapter Forty-Three
Sarah walked, Bobby by her side, and tried not to think about the gun pointing at her back.
It was dark and humid. The muddy ground splashed right up Sarah’s legs, ruining her favourite jeans. It didn’t seem to be letting up, either. Which didn’t bode well, because she didn’t know exactly where she was being taken.
Only that she was being punished for putting up a fight.
And she was going to pay, somehow.
She heard the over-excited laughter of the men she was with. They were just thugs, really. Thugs who were taking advantage of the chaos, wreaking havoc in any way they could. When she’d first saw them at her doorstep, Sarah had wondered if these people were there for her home. After all, one of her deliverymen, Sam—the one Alex was always so convinced snooped on their mail—was with this group.
But clearly Sam hadn’t paid the kind of attention he probably should’ve done. If he had, he’d have a nice home for himself right now.
What they’d done instead… Sarah wasn’t sure she’d ever be able to forget it.
She thought about the pained cries as her animals were killed, one by one.
She thought about the sound of smashing as they went through and ransacked her home, taking everything good and portable they could get their hands on.
And then she thought about the worst thing of all.
The orange glow.
The building flames.
The smell of smoke as her home was engulfed.
And just how quickly its foundations had come undone.
She’d cried as she watched her home start to burn. Not because she was sentimental. She was good at detaching herself from the past. But because this was such a fortress of she and Alex’s. They’d been through so much, and yet these walls were always there for them to return to.
Now, they were gone.
Sarah was really on her own with Bobby.
Alex was a long way away from her, no matter where he actually was.
She felt her stomach turn as she pictured him arriving back home full of so much optimism… only to find it in the state it was in. Or rather, an even worse state than it was in when Sarah had been forced to leave it.
What had got into the world?
What had possessed these people to lose so much of their dignity in just a matter of hours?
She felt something hit the small of her back. “Keep moving.”
Hearing that voice made Sarah’s stomach sink as she was snapped from the moment
. She picked up her pace, wading further through the slushy mud. There was a torchlight shining their path, but it wasn’t great. She wondered if it was one of those Alex had been keeping in one of those Faraday cages of his.
No. Alex wouldn’t keep such a shitty torch. He’d be prepared with something much more effective than that.
Sarah looked to her right and she saw her son.
He was walking with his head lowered. She could barely make out his face in the darkness, but she could tell from the way his shoulders were slumped that he was disappointed. Like he felt that he’d let her down, somehow.
She’d told him to hide in the house. But that plan soon turned upside down when it became clear that staying in the house wasn’t going to be an option.
She remembered the look on his face as he watched his room—his absolute pride and joy—go up in smoke. She hoped he wouldn’t ever have to witness something so upsetting ever again.
She wanted to reach over to him, to put her hand on his back, to tell him everything was okay.
But she couldn’t.
She just couldn’t.
All she could do was keep on walking to wherever these people were taking them.
All she could do was hope that somehow, they ran into another group who weren’t happy with what they were doing. A group who still had their morals. Because there had to be groups like that left. The majority of people hadn’t gone insane overnight. No, the bad ones had always been bad, deep down.
Of course in time, things would change. Good people would do bad things in order to survive. The whole idea of morality would be turned on its head.
But that wasn’t yet.
There was still time to be good right now.
There was still time to come together.
There was still—
“Did you hear that?”
The man’s voice came from Sarah’s left. She turned and saw Tommy, the guy who was supposed to be watching her and Bob very closely, staring into the darkness of the trees.
Sam—the self-appointed leader of this group—tutted and pointed his torch in the direction that Tommy was looking. “Hear what, mate?”
“I just heard something.
“You heard jack shit. There’s nothing…”
Sarah heard it then.
A shuffling in the trees right opposite where Tommy and Sam were looking.
She felt her insides turn with a combination of optimism and fear. She held her breath, took a few steps to Bobby’s side. She brushed herself against him, so he knew she was there. She wanted to tell him they were going to be okay, but she couldn’t, not right now. She had to stay as quiet as possible. She had something else in mind.
Sam groaned and shook his head. “Mate, there’s nothing there. You’ve always been a jumpy bastard. End of the world isn’t gonna change that.”
“I know what I heard,” Tommy said, his voice quivering. “There’s—there’s someone out there.”
“And you know it’s a ‘someone’ and not, like, an animal, do you? Just from that little shuffling sound you heard then?”
“Whatever it was, it’s coming our way.”
He had his gun lifted. Pointed into the darkness. Sam was by his side, torch shining forward. The other three members of the group, they all seemed similarly pre-occupied by the noise in the woods.
And that pre-occupation gave Sarah hope.
It gave her an opportunity.
She swallowed a lump in her throat.
She leaned down into Bobby’s ear.
“We’re going to run the other way. Now.”
She saw Tommy’s torch begin to turn but there was no holding back, not anymore.
She turned the other way and ran into the darkness.
She looked, made sure Bobby was by her side, as her feet slushed through the thick mud. Behind, she heard a few shouts, a few panicked voices, and she knew they were onto her already.
So she waded between the trees, being sure to keep Bobby close, being certain not to put him in any danger.
The rain lashed against her face. Tree branches scratched at her cheeks. But she kept on going because she had to. It was all she could do.
Staying with this group wasn’t going to end well.
So she and Bobby were going to get away from them.
They were going to escape.
They were—
She felt the thick patch of mud open up beneath her and she knew already what was going to happen.
Her body catapulted forward.
She closed her eyes, held her breath.
And then she slammed into the earth, head first.
The mud wrapped around her face. She pulled to get away from it, then gasped for air. She looked around, but all she could see was darkness. “Bobby!”
She clambered her way out of the mud. She looked to her left, to her right, but there was no sign of him. No sign of anybody.
Her stomach turned. “No,” she said, as she tried to find her footing again. “Bob. Are you there? Are you…”
She saw the torchlight spark to life just a few feet away from her.
Then, she saw Bob’s little face light up in it.
Sam was holding the torch.
Tommy was holding the handgun.
And he was pointing it at Bob’s head.
Sarah felt her whole body sinking, like the mud was dragging her down. She staggered towards her son, unable to act logically, just eager to get him out of harm’s way. “Let him go. Please.”
“You had a chance to let us into your home,” Sam said, clearly enjoying this whole performance of his. “You didn’t. But we let you live anyway. You had a chance to join us. To be a part of our new end-of-days family. But you turned your back on us then, too. So now I’ve only got one option. Now, there’s no choice. No choice at all.”
Sarah wanted to fight. She wanted to scrap with every ounce of energy in her body for her son.
But she knew that one move might kill him.
One wrong move might end it all for him.
“So what’s it going to be?” Sam asked.
“I’ll tell you what it’s going to be.”
The voice.
It came from nowhere.
But Sarah recognised it.
She knew who it belonged to.
And then she saw him.
Sam turned his torch.
And through the trees, Alex—along with a woman and a child—stepped out of the trees.
He looked right at Sarah, rain pouring down his face, and he looked at her like he could see her right in the darkness.
“Hello, love,” he said.
And there was a moment between them. A moment of total relief. A moment where everything seemed completely okay.
Then he lifted his handgun, pointed it at Tommy’s head.
“You don’t have to worry anymore. I’m here.”
Chapter Forty-Four
I watched the tears roll down my son’s cheeks as the man held a gun right to his head.
It was dark. But that darkness didn’t bother me at all—I could see clearly in it now. The pouring rain didn’t bother me either. If anything, its loud pattering against the leaves and the branches had made sneaking up on this group a whole lot easier.
And it’d helped me follow their footprints, too.
But now I was here—now I was back with my wife and my child—I knew I had a lot of work to do if I wanted to get us all out of this situation alive.
The man with the gun to Bobby’s head looked at me with narrowed eyes. He was gaunt and didn’t look like he’d had a good meal in a long time. Not the best frame to be when food was going to become a whole lot harder to come by in the coming days, weeks, months.
But still he looked at me, that gun to my son’s head. Still that wry smirk stayed on his face, glowed up by his friend’s torch.
“I think you should lower that gun from my son’s head right now,” I said. “Or I’ll kill every single one of you. That’s a pro
mise.”
The man with the gun didn’t turn his attention from me. But the man with the torch did. He stepped forward, walked over to me. And before I knew it, he was standing right opposite me, staring into my eyes, torch lighting the space between us.
And it was then that I recognised him. Sam. The deliveryman. The absolute creep of a deliveryman.
“You see, I’m not sure the odds are stacked in your favour right now. You have a gun pointed at my friend. My friend has a gun pointed at your son’s head. And I have other friends in the trees. Others, watching. And they won’t be afraid to fire.”
“He’s lying,” Sarah said.
I looked over at Sarah. Just hearing her voice was surreal, like I still couldn’t believe we were reunited at all despite the circumstances.
“That’s the only gun they have,” she said.
Sam narrowed his eyes. “I wouldn’t be so confident about that.”
“If you’d had any other weapons, you’d have shown them by now.”
Sam smiled. Then he looked away from my wife and back at me. “So you have a gun to my friend, and my friend has a gun to your son’s head. Still, I’d say the odds are pretty well stacked in my favour, wouldn’t you?”
My body tensing, I wanted to just pull that trigger and be done with it, but I knew I had to keep my cool, so I resisted the urge. I could make no rash moves here. “What do you want?”
Sam’s smile widened. “I’m glad you ask. See, what I want is pretty simple, really. I’ve always struggled getting myself a girlfriend. It’s the acne. Not a good look for a middle-aged man. But when I came across your wife… well. Let’s just say I’ve been very interested in her for a very long time.”
Sickness built inside, and I tightened my grip on the trigger. So close to firing. So close to putting this creep down. “You sick bastard.”
Sam shrugged. “I became rather fond of your wife. I enjoyed learning about her life. And I took an interest in you too, Alex. Your hobbies. Your little ‘prepping’ activities. I learned a lot. Just such a pity your home had to come down. But I suppose if this world gives us an opportunity for one thing above anything, it’s a fresh start. Right?”
I resisted the urge to speak. All I could do was hold my gun and try my best not to pull that trigger. I couldn’t risk anything that would put my son in danger.
