I’m in a trance so I say nothing. Suddenly, he picks me up and I wrap my legs around him. My back hits the shower wall as he kisses me harder and desperate.
“Please, baby, say yes. Let me love you. You’re driving me crazy.”
I look into his eyes and see the need because I feel it too. He penetrates me, making me holler out, “Fuck, you feel so good.”
He remains still while he kisses me with so much passion I can barely breathe. Once he starts thrusting I’m a goner. He feels so right, so good. He fucks me the only way I ever want to be fucked. He does it with so much emotion. No matter if he goes slow or fast and hard, he never loses connection with me. He never makes me feel like I’m being used. He thrusts in and out with a purpose. His hand starts to slide between us.
“I need you to cum, I won’t last long. You want to cum for me?”
“Yes, Zander, yes.”
He starts rubbing my clit as he sucks on my neck. It doesn’t take me long before I am screaming his name and exploding on his cock.
He stills. “Damn, Red, you’re squeezing the hell out of my cock.” I can’t wait, I don’t want to stop, so I start using my body to fuck him back, making him shout out my name. He slams his hand against the shower wall and growls in my ear. “Woman you’re going to kill me. I can’t hold out anymore.” He explodes, filling me full of his warm cum. He’s breathing heavy in my ear and then I feel kisses along my neck. He slides out of me and lets me back down gently.
We look into each other’s eyes. I catch a tear roll down my face. Damn this pregnancy; I find it harder to hold my emotions in.
I wipe my face and tell him, “I can’t, Zander, I’m sorry. I just can’t.”
He looks deep into my eyes and I know he feels my sincerity. I am determined not to let him in. He backs away, walking out of the shower. When I hear the door slam I slide down the wall and cry. I can’t believe I had sex with him again. I promised I wouldn’t and now I can’t take it back. Maybe I will be the one to hurt him, but I can’t be the one to get hurt.
By the time I make it to the bedroom, he’s gone. I lay in bed wondering if he’ll be back tonight or not. Part of me wants him here and part of me hopes he stays away. That’s the only way I can trust myself is if he isn’t here.
50
Murphy
The next morning I’m eating breakfast with the family when Gabriel asks where Zander is.
“I’m not sure. He never came back home.”
They all look at me but don’t ask anything else. I go to work and notice that Bobby is staying close to me, so I finally ask why. He says that Zander called him and asked him to stay close to me until he returns. I don’t bother to ask where he is even though I want to.
The next week passes, and still no Zander. My mom starts questioning me about where he is. I tell them all honestly, “I don’t know.” Again, I leave for work. I tell Liam not to worry about coming in, that I want to put some more work in tonight.
Even though Liam and I wound up hiring another night manager in case we both needed the night off, I still want to work, it’s the only thing that takes my mind off Zander.
Around eleven at night Vin knocks on my door. I smile and tell him to come in. I love Vin, he is no-nonsense, he’s a man of few words and I for one appreciate that.
Curious, I ask, “What are you doing here?”
He walks in and sits down. “I thought I would stop by and maybe fill you in on where your husband has been.”
“I’m not sure I care.”
“Don’t you?”
“All right, Vin, I’ll play along. Where is my husband?”
“He has been sleeping at his home, but he has been spending his time at Theo’s club.”
“Okay, well thank you for letting me know. I’m sure Catherine will be very interested.”
“And you’re not?”
“Thank you, Vin, but Zander is a grown man. He knows where to find me if he wants or needs me.”
Vin laughs. “You are one hard ass woman. I’m glad he found you. He needs someone like you in his life. But like you said, he is a grown ass man. A man that I think might be at his limit.”
I watch as Vin stands and walks out my office.
“Damn him!” I throw my calendar across the room. “Shit!”
I bend to pick up my calendar and notice when I flip the pages to tomorrow that I have an ultrasound scheduled in the morning. Tomorrow marks the end of the first trimester of my pregnancy. I toss the calendar on my desk and sit back down. Leaning back, I wonder if he remembers; shit, I guess I’ll go find him and tell him. It’s an excuse to see him, I’m quite aware it is, but I can’t stop myself from leaving the casino.
Bobby takes me to the club and I enter looking for Zander. I spot him with a girl on his lap, typical. I walk up and sit down, crossing my legs. “Hello, husband.” The girl in his lap doesn’t even flinch when I call him my husband, she continues to grind him. Zander looks up and says, “Well, hello to you to, wife. How are you?”
“I’m well, I see you are too.”
“You know, living life.”
“Your mother and family have been wondering where you are.”
He laughs. “Red, I guarantee you they know exactly where I have been. Have you wondered?”
“Do you think we can get rid of the girl for a minute, so we can talk?”
The bitch looks at me and has the nerve to say, “The way I see it, honey, is if he were happy at home then he wouldn’t be here with me.”
Oh, she has no idea who she’s fucking with. I sit up to show her who I am. “Has he touched you? I bet you money that my husband has done nothing to you but let you grind on his dick. You know how I know, honey? Because that man knows what’s at home for him and he knows that if he touched you, I would have a man in my bed so fast it would make his head spin.”
Zander pushes her off his lap. “Don’t you mean our bed?”
“Silly me, of course, darling.” I look back at the girl and say, “I will fuck another man in our bed so fast his head will spin.”
I look back at Zander. “Was that better?”
He slaps the girl’s ass and tells her to go. She tries to argue until he looks at her, she vanishes without another word.
“Why are you here, Red?”
“I came to remind you that I have an ultrasound scheduled for tomorrow. I’m twelve weeks now. If you’re interested, it’s at ten in the morning.”
“I’ll be there.”
“Are you coming home?”
“Do you care?”
“I care to know what to tell your mother.”
He nods his head and tells me, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I stand and leave the club. I’ll be damned if he is going to make me look like an idiot. I will not ask him to come back home.
51
Zander
I couldn’t go back home. When Murphy told me she couldn’t after we had sex, something snapped in me. She fucked with my head, I thought for the first time since we were married that we were making headway. But then she turned me away. I needed time away from her.
But tonight, she comes finding me. She threatens me with the fact that if I touched another girl then she would do the same. But I was happy she put Star in her place. I know Star has been worried about me, but I also know she wished it was her that was my wife. She has been trying for days to get me to fuck her again. But I am not that man anymore. Even if I wanted to, I don’t think I could, Murphy has ruined me for all others. It doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy other women, but I wouldn’t cheat on her and it sounds like she knows it. Which makes me smile, that’s my girl. She didn’t get jealous, but she definitely marked her territory.
I didn’t go home last night, after seeing Murphy, I decided to let her sweat it for a little longer. But I arrive right on time for the doctor’s appointment. I wouldn’t miss this for anything. She looks at me, fuming.
“What’s wrong, Red?”
“Nothin
g, I wasn’t sure you were going to make it.”
Oh, she’s trying to play it cool; well, two of us can do that.
“I told you I would be here.”
“How was your night with, what’s her name again?”
“Star, and you know I didn’t spend the night with her. Like you said, I know what I have at home.”
“I thought maybe you forgot.”
“I forget nothing.”
Before we can spar any longer, the nurse calls Murphy’s name. We stand to make our way to the back room. I sit in the chair as the nurse tells Murphy to take everything off from the waist down and cover with a sheet. She says the doctor will be with us in a few minutes. I spread my legs across the floor and watch as Murphy strips down. The view is incredible, she turns and sees me watching.
“What are you looking at?”
“What’s mine.”
“Sometimes you can be a big brute.”
“Sure can, Red, best remember that.”
Dr. Martin walks in, I stand and shake his hand then he turns to Murphy. “Hello, I am Dr. Paul Martin, It’s nice to meet you. I am sure Catherine told you I’m a friend of the family but I have been her physician for a long time. Fallon and Avery are also a patients of mine.” Murphy shakes his hand and introduces herself. She then sits down on his patient table as he starts talking to the both of us on what we can expect with the second trimester. He says her morning sickness should start to calm down now and that she might also start to feel more of a libido. He says it doesn’t happen to all women, but a lot feel so drained and sick through the first trimester that they make up for any sexual loss with the second. He tells us about her weight gain and any possible movements.
She says, “I have already felt some slight bubbles. My mom says that’s the baby, is it?”
He nods and says that they will be getting stronger. Why didn’t she tell me she felt that?
He has her lay back and put her feet into stirrups. He starts to examine her vaginally. I see her face tighten and then she grabs my hand. If he’s hurting her, doctor or no doctor, I will punch him right here.
He sees my face and says, “Zander, don’t look at me like that. It’s uncomfortable, but I am not hurting her. She will be fine. Gabriel was the same way.”
When he’s finished, Murphy lets my hand go. I want to tell him to do it all over again just to feel her reach out for me. He then turns down the lights and tells us it’s time to see our baby. He sits on a stool going between Murphy’s legs. He then holds up what looks like a rod with a condom on it. What the hell? He looks at me and laughs.
“Calm down, Zander.”
I’ll show him calm. He inserts it into her and then it happens again, she grabs my hand. I forget all about what he’s doing until he tells us to watch the monitor. He starts showing us the sac and our little baby. But then he gets quiet and says, “Murphy, Zander, it looks like you are having twins.”
We both shout, “What!?”
Dr. Paul laughs at our reactions and says, “Yes, twins, as in there are two.”
He removes the probe and Murphy jumps up, “I’m going to be sick!”
I’m frozen, stunned and what the fuck ever else you want to call it! Finding out that we are having twins is insane, crazy, absurd, but then it is awesome as shit!
We are having two babies, I can’t believe it! “Red, two babies! Red, are you okay?”
While I was busy trying to wrap my brain around the idea, Red is in the corner throwing her guts up in the trash can. She finally stands back up with her sheet wrapped around her and says, “I can’t have twins. I don’t know what to do with one, now I’m having two.”
“I’m going to help you, Red. We’ll learn together. There has to be some kind of classes, right Doc?”
He looks at us and nods. I gather a shocked Murphy in my arms and place her back on the table. Dr. Paul starts showing us pamphlets and classes around the city that we can take. Murphy is not saying anything. I look at her as she remains in shock. When the doctor leaves. I have to help Murphy get dressed; she is no condition to do anything. I stand her up and slide her skirt on then help her with her shoes. I then walk her out of the room and down to the lobby. “Shit! Red, we forgot your purse. I’m going to sit you down right here and I will be right back.” I sit her down and run back to the room. On my way, I spot the doc so I take the opportunity to ask some of my own questions.
“Hey, Doc I was wondering man to man. Now that it’s twins, can, you know, we still…”
He shakes his head and then I see another man poke his head out from a room looking with curiosity. “Yes, Zander. Fathers always worry about this. I remember Gabriel, he was a crazy man. Listen, unless something is wrong and I tell you to stop; go for it. Enjoy having sex with your wife. Now I will tell you with twins, it is more than likely there will be some issues toward the end. It shouldn’t be anything too serious, but sexual activity might have to stop then. So, for now, enjoy.” He then looks over at the other man. “Got that, Mr. Pierce?” Mr. Pierce nods, then I say. “Doc I’m on the larger size if you know what I mean, like large. Can I hurt the babies?” I see Mr. Pierce still looking so I take my hands and show him how large we are talking. His brows pinch and he quickly leaves our conversation.
The doc laughs some more and says, “No, Zander, you will be fine, just listen for Murphy to tell you if it’s uncomfortable. If she’s fine then you’re fine.”
“Okay, Doc Thanks.”
Ha, that’s a relief. I did not want to be like Gabriel going crazy thinking he was going to hurt the baby. I didn’t think I would, but hey, I needed to be sure. I find Murphy still where I left her. “Hey Red, you ready? I have your purse. Let’s go.”
We make it back home and when we enter everyone is there waiting to hear what the doctor said. I am wearing the biggest smile, but Murphy is still in shock.
Cherry asks first, “What’s wrong? Is everything all right with the baby?”
I pass Murphy off to her mother and then I announce, “Everything is fine, she’s just in shock a little because we learned we’re having twins.”
Everyone jumps up thrilled with the idea, they’re congratulating us when Murphy jumps up and yells at me, “This is your fault, you big brute. Not only did you knock me up, but now you gave me two babies in one shot.”
I rock on my heels and make the mistake of saying, “I sure did.” Well, that doesn’t go over well because before I know it she slaps me again. Damn, this is becoming a damn habit. She runs upstairs and leaves me holding my face.
Theo comes over to me and slaps my back, “Way to go, son! I’m proud of you. Instead of one grandbaby, I’m going to have two at one time. Hey, this calls for a celebration!”
Mom hugs me and so do all the other women. Gabriel, Vin, Liam and I join Theo at the bar. “It’s early, but what the hell, let’s celebrate.”
Cherry excuses herself to go check on Murphy.
52
Murphy
There’s a knock on my door. “Come in.” My mother enters and says, “I see you finally got a new door.” I start crying as my mom runs over to me. “Mom, what am I supposed to do? I had no idea what to do with one baby and now I have two. I cannot believe he did this to me.”
Mom hugs and starts rocking me like when I was little. “Aww, Chéri, you will be fine. One baby, two babies what’s the difference? Besides, you have so much help here, it will all work out.”
Then she looks at me wiping my tears. “By the way, I don’t think Zander did this. We have twins on our side of the family, my father was a twin, it skips a generation. I wasn’t sure if it would happen to you, but look at it as a blessing.”
“A blessing how?”
“Well, you can have two children for the price of one pregnancy. Your family will be built faster.”
“I don’t think I want anymore. I’m still wrapping my head around these.”
“Have you discussed it with Zander, how many you both want?”
“What do you mean not having sex?”
“I don’t plan on ever sleeping with him again. He can go elsewhere. He has me as his wife, but in name only.”
“You stupid girl!”
Mom jumps from the bed. “I cannot believe you. That man is your future whether you like it or not. Why not make the best of it?”
“You know why. You know I never wanted to get married. I am not about to let him make a fool out of me. The minute I let my guard down around him, he’s going to hurt me. I will not give him the satisfaction!”
“Murphy, you are the one making a fool out of yourself. Zander loves you. He does Chéri. You will be the one hurting him and your children. How do you think they are going to react to you being a cold-hearted bitch to their father?”
“Look at me, Murphy. What happens if Zander finds love with someone else? What will you have then?”
“I will have my children, my name, and my casino. That’s all I need.”
“Stupid, stupid girl. I cannot believe I raised such a selfish woman.”
“I can’t, Mom. I’m scared. I don’t want to have to walk around on eggshells everyday waiting for him to break me.”
“Then you will suffer for it, my dear. I want you happy, but if you don’t allow yourself happiness then there is nothing I can do for you. You will die a bitter old woman. You will become Judith. Think that one over.”
She leaves my room after telling me I will be Judith. How dare she? I am nothing like Judith, am I? No, I’m not, I am just self-resilient. This would be so much easier if I had no attraction whatsoever to Zander. All I need is my babies and my casino.
53
Zander
For the rest of the day, Murphy had all her meals brought to our bedroom. When it came time to go to bed everyone left and I sat there trying to decide on do I go back to my house or do I stay and try again? Do I try to work things out with a woman who wants nothing to do with me? I don’t know. I thought we had a chance to make this work, especially when she let me make love to her again, but then she totally shut me out right after. I can only take so much.
Art of War (A Stern Family Saga Book 3) Page 26
