“Maddie, come with me again. I want you to come when I do. I’m so close, I can’t hold back. You feel too good, too perfect. Please.” His words were garbled. All Madison could do was nod as her body was gripped in another earth-shattering orgasm. As soon as he felt her ripple around him, he let go of his control and a flash of lightning surged down his —
Carter jolted upright in his bed, confused as to where he was. His eyes roamed wildly around the room, only lit up by the full moon outside the window. It was a dream. It was just a dream. He lay back down and closed his eyes. It was still playing in his mind — on repeat — and he wasn’t ready to let it go just yet. His breath was coming in ragged puffs and sweat covered his skin, making it glisten in the moonlight.
Fuck, that was intense. I can’t believe I had a sex dream about a woman I’ve never even been with. That hasn’t happened since I was a teenager. Carter admitted out loud to himself. His dick was still rock hard, and his only regret was that he hadn’t been able to finish what he’d started in the dream. Somehow, Madison had gotten a seriously firm grip on his insides and he had no clue how to pry himself loose. He could only hope it would lessen once he was back at the agency and in his own home 900 miles away. Funnily enough, that thought didn’t make him feel any better. He sat in his bed for a long time, waiting for his body to calm down, but eventually realized nothing was going to make that one particular part cooperate. He swung his legs onto the floor and stepped into the bathroom to turn the shower on for the second time in only a few hours. He would feel better getting rid of the sweat that had started to dry on his skin. With the water set to scalding, he stepped under the rainfall shower head and leaned against the wall, supporting himself with his muscled arms. Flashes of the dream kept running through his head and his cock twitched every time glimpses of Madison’s naked skin etched themselves to the inside of his eyelids. It wasn’t long before one hand dropped to his painfully hard dick and started stroking it. In his mind, he went back to the dream and soon enough, he felt a tightening in his balls, and he shot his load all over the tiles and floor of the shower cubicle. He stayed leaning against the wall while catching his breath before shutting off the water. Snagging a towel off the vanity, he dried himself off while avoiding his reflection in the mirror. Emotions plowed through him too heavy and fast for him to handle. He didn’t want to see each one reflected back at him.
Having reached the peninsula yet again after racing each other the last quarter of a mile, they sat down in the soft sand and watched the sun climb over the horizon as they'd done so many times before. It was a few minutes of serenity and peace they both enjoyed and relished. Once the darkness had shifted and soft morning light flooded across the large expanse of water, they started walking back towards their own stretch of the beach. Neither felt like running and they were just content to leisurely stroll along the damp sand.
Carter kept his thoughts firmly away from the previous night’s dream. He struggled enough with his body’s reactions to Madison whenever she was near to allow any of those images back in his head. He’d bring them out only when he was safely back in Virginia.
Their conversation covered everything from the latest politics to how many people currently occupied the International Space Station — the answer to that was six, Madison informed him. Carter had never found it so easy to talk to a woman before and it surprised him. Not even Mira had been this easygoing. They’d always had the job to talk about, which had obviously had its own complications, but it had never been this carefree. They never talked about the state of the world, traveling, their hopes and dreams, or where they saw their relationship going. They never once discussed either of them not returning from an op. The fact that Mira had been on his team made him want to protect her, but Carter would never have asked her not to go on a mission. He had often had to stop himself from trying to keep her out of harm’s way, but if he would have held her back and she’d realized it, she would have had him strung up by his balls in no time.
“Thanks for dinner last night. The food was delicious, and I had a lovely time. You’ll have to let me cook for you soon.” Madison’s voice pulled him back from his wandering thoughts.
“It was my pleasure, and I’d love for you to show me what your culinary skills are like.”
“They are nowhere near as good as yours, but I’m sure I can think of something. If all else fails, there’s always frozen lasagna, or pizza delivery.” Madison laughed, making the fire in Carter’s chest burn a little hotter. Any time spent with her seemed to stoke those embers till they were near volcanic temperatures.
“Before I forget, I might not make it for our run tomorrow morning.” Carter said with an embarrassed wince.
“Oh?” The tiny sound popped free from her mouth. “Are you going somewhere?”
“No, I’m not. My friend, Nathan, the guy who owns the beach house, is coming down today, and we’re going for a couple of drinks tonight at the bar.”
“And you might be too hungover tomorrow to go running? I get it. I suppose there might be a girl or two involved in that scenario as well?” Madison teased him, but he noticed a strained undertone in her words. It warmed his belly and made his chest feel light.
“Nope, no girls. Not for me, anyway. As soon as my leg has healed up, I’ll be on my way back to Virginia and my job. I don’t want to get tangled up with a woman that I must extricate myself from. Too many complications.” Damn, he was so lying to her — and himself. He just didn’t want her to think he was hooking up with other women while he was seeing her. Wait. Hold up. He was not seeing Madison. They were running buddies. Friends. Acquaintances. That’s all. Carter tried to silence the annoying little voice in his head that was whispering the word liar very loudly.
“Well, if you need a hangover cure in the morning, give me a call and I’ll whip one up for you. I’ll even make one for your friend.” She snickered.
“If you have a hangover cure that actually works, Nate will worship you forever. He will also badger you for the recipe until you relent and give him what he wants. He’ll probably offer marriage and babies in return. You’ve been warned.” A deep laugh rumbled in Carter’s chest.
“No way, I’m not giving anyone that recipe, and for your information it does work. Or, at least it did on—“ Madison stopped abruptly and her lips pressed into a thin line. Carter knew that look. She got it every time she thought she’d said too much or hit on something she’d rather not mention. He wasn’t going to ask her about it, so he pretended he hadn’t noticed and just carried on walking. Once back at the beach cottage, after Carter had promised to let her know he was ok sometime during the next day, they said goodbye and Madison went to work on her magazine articles. She had a deadline to meet and wanted to make sure she didn’t fall behind.
Carter didn’t like the feeling that surged through his chest as he watched her disappear into her house, and for a few seconds he had the strongest urge to go after her and claim her lips in a passionate kiss. He felt his step slow and falter and had to give himself a mental slap to break himself out of it and continue towards his own place.
Once indoors, he showered and changed before picking up the phone for his weekly check in with his boss. An hour later, he finally got off the line and felt he’d just been run over by a freight train. Don Kampeche’s problems with Gaines had only increased after the idiot had convinced himself there was a conspiracy hiding in the after-action reports, and all the Team Commanders were in on it. It had taken DK the best part of a week to prove to Gaines that he’d gotten his wires completely fucked up and there was no conspiracy. The asshole had wanted to go over Kampeche’s head and report his ‘findings’ to the Director and haul every Commander in front of a Senate Committee hearing, including DK himself. Gaines believed he had proof that every Team leader had prior knowledge about who was bringing the drugs in, and from where, and that this was the reason the amount of confiscated shipments weren’t even bigger. The fact that he’d been on at least eig
ht of the ops and would be implicated along with everyone else completely escaped the man.
Carter leaned back in the high-backed chair and let out a deep sigh. What a complete and utter fuck up one man could cause. He seriously needed to get back on duty and save what was left of his team before Gaines destroyed it completely. He spent the rest of the day coming up with strategies of how to counteract the damage already done — and how to restore the agents’ faith in the system, which was severely shredded at the moment. Once he had it all down in bullet points, he emailed it to Kampeche and then closed his laptop. It was getting late and he hadn't had any lunch, so he made himself a quick sandwich to tie him over till dinner with Nathan. He walked through the house till he reached the terrace and sat down to watch the sunset, although there was nothing to see as the skies were dark and grey and the ocean whipping up hard with white horses riding the waves. He’d been so caught up with work all afternoon, he hadn’t even noticed the change in weather. There had been a news item earlier about a storm that was expected to blow in during the evening and last through the night. He hoped Madison would be ok on her own and made a mental note to give her a call later in the evening before he got too drunk to make sure she was all right.
Nathan messaged and said to meet at the diner at 8 pm so shortly before, Carter walked the short distance to the diner and snagged an empty booth in the corner. He was relieved to see Lydia wasn’t working as he really didn’t want to make things awkward for her, or himself. And he definitely didn’t want Nate to start chatting her up. She was way too innocent for the likes of him. He’d almost managed to completely avoid her so far and had only been served by her once since their ‘almost-having-sex’ encounter. He’d noticed she hadn’t been quite as cheerful and smiley when she poured his coffee but had put a brave face on it. He wasn’t going to make things even more difficult for either of them so he’d been his usual charming self around her, even though he was cringing inside and felt like a real jerk for having led her on. He was so much older than her and should have known better. The only thing he could blame it on was a real bad case of ‘blue-ball-itis’ and being a selfish bastard. That thought immediately brought back memories of the dream he’d had last night and instantly, he felt himself harden again. What the hell was the matter with him? Sporting wood whenever he was around Madison, having a very vivid sex dream he didn’t want to wake up from, and now getting hard just thinking about said dream? Something must be seriously wrong with him and he had no idea what the cure was. Actually, he did, but there was no way he could go there. As much as he wanted to have a marathon sex session with the woman who had the most perfect breasts, the most gorgeous ass, and a waist so tiny he could wrap his fingers around it, it was just never going to happen. Not with the way she flinched every time he touched her unexpectedly and gently withdrew from any skin to skin contact. The most he’d ever been allowed to do was wrap an arm around her shoulders or tuck her hand under his arm when they’d been out for lunch and at that one dinner in Port St. George. He’d promised himself he’d let her make the first move, which hadn’t happened yet, and with him getting ready to return to Virginia Beach, he was pretty sure it never would. Something held her back, and if she didn’t want to share it with him that was her decision. It didn’t stop him from lusting after her body like a teenage boy though, and he’d lost count of the times he’d brought himself off in the shower — and in his bed at night, fantasizing about what she would look like spread out underneath him. All open, waiting and willing. Shit, he couldn't go there. Not when he was sitting in public waiting for his friend who would take the piss out of him for the rest of his life if he found out. A man could dream.
Chapter Fourteen
A vibration in his pocket announcing an incoming call jerked his attention back from his lustfilled thoughts, and he immediately swiped across the screen to answer.
“Where are you, bro? I’m already at the diner waiting for you.”
“I’m sorry, man. I’m not gonna be able to make it. DK just called me back on duty. There's been some kind of emergency with an op and he needs me back in the office. I’ve turned around on the Interstate and I’m now heading back to Virginia Beach.”
“Fuck, it must be really urgent for the boss to drag you in. Don't worry about it. It’s a shame, but we can meet next time you’re down here, if I haven’t returned to duty before then.”
“I’m not sure when I’ll be back as he hasn’t given me any details yet, but it sounds like someone has really fucked up and my money is on Gaines.” Nathan sighed heavily and Carter could feel his own frustration rising. He should be there to lead his team, not Darryl-fucking-Gaines! Damn this fucking bullet wound! He’d had enough of being out of the loop and watching his brothers being endangered by an incompetent asshole. His leg was nearly healed, but it was still giving him trouble occasionally and would seize up for no reason. He couldn’t risk that happening on an assignment.
Carter sighed and dragged his fingers through his hair. “Nothing you can do about it, Nate. I’d rather you were there, keeping an eye on that fucker Darryl.”
“Thanks, man. I’ll be in touch as soon as I can. Talk to you later.”
After their conversation ended, Carter sat back in the booth to decide what to do with himself for the rest of the evening. His first thought was to call Maddie and see if she wanted to hang out, but then images from the dream resurfaced from the back of his mind where he’d tried to bury them and he cursed under his breath. There was no way he could go and see her tonight after having been inside her in his dream. He just wouldn't be able to stop himself from trying to re-create it in her bedroom — or his.
No, fuck this. Get your shit together and focus. She doesn't want you and you need to go back to being the same ‘no-strings-sex’ guy you’ve been since Mira. You flirt, you fuck, you leave. That’s it. Now, go find yourself a willing woman and have a few hours of your cock being buried inside her tight heat while you make her scream! Carter almost swore out loud. His head had gotten so turned around by Madison he’d lost sight of who he’d made himself into after Mira died. He needed to take back control of his life, get back to work, and back to random hookups for easy fucks, and he would start tonight at the bar.
With that decision firmly planted in his mind, he finished up the burger and fries he’d ordered and paid the check. Back out on the street, the wind had started blowing hard and straight in from the water, and bolts of lightning lit up the dark clouds on the horizon. The occasional clap of thunder could be heard in the distance, but the storm was still a fair way out to sea. A small tug of worry in his chest for Madison was quickly dismissed as he walked the few steps to the nearby bar. Tomorrow, most of the tourist places would start to open for the season and he couldn't wait to have more of a choice of places to have a drink, if only so he wouldn't risk bumping into Lydia. He crossed his fingers as he entered the busy space and quickly scanned the room before stepping up to the bar. With a nod to the bartender, he ordered his usual malt whiskey and sank down on a newly vacated stool.
A couple of hours later, Carter found himself still sitting there, nursing yet another shot of whiskey. He’d spent the evening chatting and flirting with every available woman in the bar — there had been plenty of them. Two bachelorette parties and one birthday party, all full of available and willing women, and he was still on his own. He was so fucking stupid! There had been at least five girls who were just his type, any of which he could be fucking right now. Two of them had even been willing to let him be with both of them at the same time. It was every man’s wet dream, for fuck’s sake. And what had he done? He’d said thanks, but no! How fucking crazy was that? Carter felt angry and disgusted with himself for being so weak. He’d just had hot sex served up on a plate and he’d said no. Maybe that bullet had damaged more than just his leg. There was no other reason he could come up with. An elfin woman’s face swam in front of his eyes at that thought, mocking him. Carter groaned and buried his head in
his hands. What the fuck was he going to do now? Madison was deep in his head but didn’t want anything more than friendship, and here he was surrounded by hot, willing chicks and his dick was asleep. Carter looked at his wristwatch. It was getting late, so he might as well go back to the house. He’d had way too much scotch and knew he’d be suffering the next day. His legs were unsteady, but he managed to stand and chucked some bills at the barman who nodded a thanks.
Agent Undone Page 12
