Elaine sighed as if Beth’s confusion was a huge inconvenience. “He really didn’t tell you anything did he?” she snorted. “I was pregnant when he crashed the car. And I lost it.”
Beth’s stomach plummeted. She could only imagine how something like that would have devastated Josh. And her sympathy for the woman before her grew. Josh had said she was troubled, but obviously she’d been through something awful.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Beth said sincerely. “I’m sure Josh feels terrible about the accident.”
“Yes, well, it’s over and done with now.” Elaine brushed off Beth’s sympathies. “And once we’re back in Chicago, we can put it and his little dalliance with you behind us.”
Little dalliance. Beth supposed that was as good a way as any to describe something she’d thought was special. Her heart was sore, literally hurting. And much as she only wanted to feel anger toward Josh, she couldn’t help but feel sorry for him, too. Was that why he’d come to Rocky Valley? It sounded as if both he and his wife had been through something awful. Life-changing.
But if that was the case, why did he sleep with Beth? Why wasn’t he back in Chicago supporting his wife?
Her head was starting to pound, and she wished Elaine would just go. Wished she’d never even heard of Josh Larson.
Another set of headlights suddenly lit up the windows, and Beth felt weak with relief. Elaine had thrown a lot of information at her, and she just wanted her to go away so she could try to process it. She heard the distinctive slam of car doors only seconds before the door burst open, and Josh ran in, his chest heaving, his eyes darting between her and Elaine. Grayson was only seconds behind, but Beth kept her eyes on Josh.
“Are you ok?” he asked her, his voice hoarse as he rushed over and grabbed her upper arms.
She hated herself for reacting to the touch of his skin against hers, even after everything that had happened.
Beth pulled herself out of his grip. “I’m fine. Don’t you think you should be checking on your wife?”
“She’s not—“
“Josh, darling. Let’s get out of here. We haven’t even had dessert.”
Beth felt nauseated at the other woman’s suggestive tone, and she looked up at him, wondering how he’d try to wriggle out of this. How could he be touching her in front of Elaine? Was he really that uncaring about both of their feelings?
She didn’t know him at all.
He closed his eyes briefly, and when he opened them again, the ice-blue depths were filled with what looked like regret.
“The last thing I want to do right now is walk away from you,” he said quietly but furiously. “But I have to take her home.”
“Just go, Josh,” she said wearily. “I don’t want to see you or her again.”
He looked as if he was about to argue, but after a moment, he dropped his hands and stepped away from her.
“Let’s go,” he said to the redhead who hurried forward and draped herself against him.
Beth couldn’t stand to see another second of it. She just turned and walked away.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
A letter.
That’s what he’d been reduced to.
A part of him, a big part, was hoping that it would appeal to her romantic nature. The other part was being practical because she’d blocked his number and wouldn’t come to the door at the Big Sky. She also hadn’t shown up to work yesterday or today.
Maybe it was better that she hadn’t.
The scene outside his apartment with Elaine, her parents, and her doctor was something he’d rather nobody had seen. But especially not Beth.
Elaine had cried and screamed. Begged him to come with her then flung angry words at him that he had to admit had stung. Accusations of ruining her life, being responsible for how everything had fallen apart for her.
A year ago — hell, a couple of months ago — he’d have believed every word flung his way. It would have destroyed him. But he’d finally gotten to a place where he no longer felt responsible for Elaine’s life and choices. Putting her behind him meant that he needed to forgive not only Elaine, but also himself, for what had happened. He could be angry that she’d come and ruined everything, but that anger was pointless, and not entirely justified since he’d made the choice not to confess everything to Beth. He’d been too caught up in feeling happy for the first time in years, not even realising that he couldn’t have had a real, honest future with her without telling her about his past.
Tonight was the last dance of the festival. It felt like a lifetime ago that it had even started. He could only laugh now as he remembered how he’d jealously wondered if she’d meet someone at it. How he’d gone on that hike just to be close to her.
There was no way she’d show up tonight, he knew. Not only was she too busy hiding herself away at home, but he’d, no doubt, ruined the whole experience for her. Probably ruined the idea of romance and love for her, too.
He’d never forgive himself for that. But she was owed an explanation, and the letter was the only way he’d get one to her. He could only hope she read it, but it was out of his hands now.
Had he been selfish to tell her that, in spite of everything, he loved her? Maybe. But it was too late now to do anything about it. He’d confessed his entire past. Elaine’s affair, the crash he’d felt responsible for, the loss of the child she’d said she didn’t want. All of it.
But he’d also confessed his feelings for her. How she’d made him want to live again. How she’d made this place feel like home in a way nobody and nothing had before. How he knew now that he’d never really loved before her. Because nothing in the world would ever stop him loving her. How even if she never spoke a word to him again, he’d love her.
He’d driven out to the Big Sky this morning and dropped it through the door. And he’d heard nothing from her. That told him everything he needed to know. If she wanted to forgive him, she would have called him. The pain he felt at the idea that he’d lost her forever was gut-wrenching. But he wouldn’t give up hoping. Hope was all he had right now.
“It’s crap, right? I mean, after everything that’s happened, I shouldn’t fall for this?” Beth paced up and down while Brooke and Paige watched her silently.
Zoe, Jenna, and Tara were all working; otherwise, she’d have called them for reinforcements too.
She hadn’t shown them the letter. It felt too personal, too intimate. But she’d given them the gist of it. Enough for them to knock some sense into her because her stupid heart had turned to mush.
He loved her. That was what it said.
I know this isn’t the way to tell you. And I know it’s probably the last thing you want to hear from me. But I love you, Beth. And I wish I was standing in front of you telling you, but there it is. Even if you decide not to hear me out, if you decide you never want to hear from me again, I still need you to know it.
I love you in a way that I didn’t even know existed. I’ve fallen in love with you the way the men in those over-the-top, gushy movies fall in love. Completely and with every piece of me.
She’d bawled her eyes out at that part.
What if he was telling the truth? What if he loved her that much? That was the love she’d always wanted.
That was her Mr. Darcy-Romeo-Heathcliffe kind of love. Only with less arrogance and death and haunting.
She’d felt herself wanting to go to him, so she’d done the sensible thing and called in the troops. They’d give her a good talking to, especially Brooke. They’d tell her that it was time she grew up and accepted that was not how the real world worked. They’d remind her that Josh had kept his past a secret and not really opened up to her.
“Well?” she prompted now, when her friends stayed quiet.
Brooke and Paige shared a speaking look.
“Did you hear about yesterday morning?” Paige asked by way of answer.
“What do you mean?” Beth frowned.
Zoe had called her last night, but Beth
hadn’t answered.
“There was a bit of an incident with Josh and his ex-wife yesterday outside his apartment building.”
Beth’s stomach flipped.
“Is he ok?” she asked. “Is he hurt?”
Paige grinned at her reaction, but Brooke rolled her eyes. “He’s fine. I was grabbing books from Zoe when I heard the commotion. His ex, what is her name?” She frowned.
“Elaine,” Beth answered impatiently.
“Yes, Elaine. Well, she was screaming, crying, asking Josh to come with her, saying she loved him. Anyway, when he finally managed to get her hands off him, she— Well, she was very upset,” Paige said demurely.
“She flipped the eff out,” Brooke said frankly. “Said he was a child murderer and that she’d never forgive him.”
“Oh, that’s horrible,” Beth whispered.
Josh’s misplaced guilt had practically jumped off the page of his letter when he wrote of that accident. She could just imagine how much Elaine’s words would have hurt.
“Anyway, there was an older couple there, I’m assuming her parents, who eventually managed to drag her ass into a car, and that was it. She was gone.”
“Wow,” Beth said, because she didn’t really know what to say.
“I felt really sorry for him,” Paige said sadly. “He looked terrible. I mean, hot as all get out, obviously, but terrible.”
“Yeah, but — but that doesn’t change anything does it?” Beth asked hesitantly. “I mean… he still lied.”
Brooke and Paige shared another look while Beth flopped into the chair across from them.
“We can’t tell you what to do, Beth,” Paige said gently. “But—“
“But what?”
“—but we all make mistakes, and from the little I saw, and what you’ve said, I can kind of understand him taking his time getting into something new and dragging all of that up.”
Paige was a bleeding heart though, Beth told herself. She was just as soft and mushy as Beth herself.
She didn’t want to be foolish. Her heart had steered her wrong for a year with that man. She couldn’t trust it.
Brooke would bawl her out and get her head on straight. She turned to the beautiful brunette who never, ever took crap and hardly every believed men when they claimed innocence.
“What do you think?” Beth asked, half afraid of the answer.
Brooke narrowed one eye. “You love him, huh?” she asked.
“So much,” Beth said tearfully. “But I don’t want to get hurt. And I know I’m too romantic, I know I look for fairy tales when real life doesn’t work that way. I don’t want to be an idiot.”
Brooke nodded.
“So?” Beth asked when her friend still hadn’t given her the kick-up-the-butt she clearly needed.
Brooke sighed and got to her feet, holding out a hand to Beth. “So,” she said with a tiny smile. “I think we need to get you ready for tonight.”
“I’m not going tonight,” Beth said mutinously.
“This festival was to find love, right?” Brooke asked.
Beth nodded miserably, feeling even stupider.
A speed-dating festival! What had she been thinking? People didn’t fall in love that quickly.
You can’t hurry love, Josh had warned her, even though she had fallen in love that quickly, to her detriment, as it turned out. So, he’d been right.
“Then go get it, Beth,” Brooke said.
“You don’t think I’m a fool?”
“Oh, I do.” Brooke grinned. “It just so happens he’s a fool too, so you’re perfectly matched.”
Beth stared at her most unforgiving friend before slowly, an answering grin spread across her face. Squealing, she threw her arms around Brooke then Paige before running toward her room.
She had a happily ever after to go get.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Beth walked into the community center feeling more nervous than she’d felt in high school before they’d announced Prom Queen. There was a lot more at stake tonight than a plastic crown and a sash. But she’d been pronounced Queen that night, and she fully intended to get her prize tonight, too.
She ran a hand self-consciously over the dress. The red suited her bright hair, and the matching lipstick made her eyes look bluer. But it was a little lower cut than what she was used to, which was why she’d never worn it before tonight.
But Brooke had taken one look at it and announced that nothing else would do for the occasion, and since Beth was a little scared of Brooke, she did as she was told.
As she looked around the room, she saw Gerald’s eyes widen as he waved at her. She waved back then turned her back in case she’d given him the wrong idea.
Her eyes fell on John the actuary, and she was delighted to see him dancing with Elsie Caine, looking adorably loved up. Looked like their brunch the other day had gone well.
She spotted Zoe and Beck, but they were in the midst of a full on make-out session that she didn’t particularly want to get in the middle of.
All of her brothers were with yet more girls, and Beth could only roll her eyes at their antics.
Brooke excused herself and walked to the bar where Damon Wakefield made a beeline for her. And was quickly batted away.
“I don’t think he’s here,” Beth whispered to Paige who gave her hand a supportive squeeze.
“Ladies, you’re looking gorgeous this evening.”
Beth turned as Mason Decker smiled down at them both, though Beth could see he was only really watching Paige.
Paige stiffened beside her. “I’m just going to check on the band,” she said rigidly before hurrying away.
“Still her favourite person in Rocky Valley.” Mason grinned, but it was tinged with frustration.
“Maybe if you weren’t destroying the thing she loved the most, you’d get a warmer reception,” Beth pointed out a little icily.
Mason had never done anything to her, but he was bothering Paige, so sides needed to be taken.
“I’m not destroying anything,” he answered. “I’ll keep the integrity of the building, which she’d know if she listened to me.”
“You don’t get it, do you?” Beth asked, exasperated. “It’s not just the building, Mason. That library is important to Paige. And she will never forgive you if you ruin it. Never,” she emphasised, just in case her hunch about Mason and Paige was correct.
He stared across the room at her for a minute before cursing under his breath. “I need a drink,” he muttered, stomping off toward the bar.
And then she was alone. She clasped her hands self-consciously, wondering if Josh was going to be a no-show. Had he changed his mind? Decided that she’d ignored him for too long?
It hadn’t been that long, she told herself a little defensively. And he’d kept her waiting a year, so she was perfectly entitled to—
The band suddenly stopped playing halfway through a song.
Beth frowned up in confusion, hoping something wasn’t wrong with the sound system. Paige didn’t need anything going wrong tonight, not after all her hard work. She was getting ready to rush over to her friend to see what was going on, when music sounded not from the band, but still through their speakers. She recognised it immediately.
Air Supply, Making Love Out of Nothing At All.
Her heart fluttered wildly. The song that had been playing that night in her bakery. Turning in a circle, she scanned the room. And then she saw him.
He was standing in the middle of the dance floor looking ridiculously handsome in a shirt the same blue as his eyes. As she watched, he smiled at her and held out a hand.
The crowd around him parted, and she swallowed hard, walking slowly toward him.
It was actually happening, she thought, her heart hammering in her chest. The movie ending. The part of the book that made her cross-eyed with the romance of it all.
It was happening to her right now.
When she was inches from him, she put her hand in his, and he didn
’t waste any time pulling her closer and wrapping her in his arms.
“Air Supply?” she asked shakily.
“Making love out of nothing at all,” he answered softly. “Something I didn’t think was possible until you.”
He reached a hand up and ran his knuckles over her cheek.
“I was nothing when I got here, Beth. You made me whole again.”
Beth felt her eyes fill with tears.
“I’ll never stop regretting hurting you. I’ll never stop trying to make it up to you. And I’ll never stop loving you.”
She felt a tear fall down her cheek, and she hoped it looked lovely and ladylike but figured, since she was a certified ugly crier, that her face was a hot mess right then. But she didn’t care.
“I love you, too,” she whispered. “And I’ll never stop either.”
Josh watched the tears fall from Beth’s beautiful eyes, and damned if he didn’t feel his own filling up.
“I love you, too.” Her words overwhelmed him.
The relief he’d felt when she’d texted him to say she’d be here was nothing compared to the feelings running through him now. He’d never understand how he’d been fortunate enough to find a woman like Beth Carroway, but he would take it and thank his lucky stars.
The look on her face as she’d stood across the room hearing that song and realising what it meant would stay with Josh for the rest of his life. And he vowed then and there that they’d dance to it again as husband and wife.
He knew they’d talk about the letter and about his plans for the future and everything else they needed to talk about. But right then, talking just wouldn’t cut it.
He lifted her chin, knowing that they were in full view of pretty much everyone in Rocky Valley, but not particularly caring.
“Looks like your matchmaking festival worked,” he said, inching his lips closer to hers.
“Only took a week to get a man to say he loves me.” She smiled through her tears. “And you did say you can’t hurry love.”
“You can’t,” he insisted. “I loved you from the first night I met you, Beth Carroway. It just took me nearly this long to realise it.”
Can’t Hurry Love Page 15
