“So, we’re tricking them out of it,” I asked, knowing that I would be included in this plan. My sister was about as tricky as a domesticated dog. That’s why my father had included me in this breakfast.
“At tonight’s dinner, your job will be to entertain the shaman,” the king said, his eyes steady on me. “Find out what you can about the jaguar amulet. Tomorrow we will reconvene here to discuss how to go about obtaining it.”
“I have plans tonight,” I said. “But I’ll come to breakfast tomorrow to discuss your progress.”
It seemed like a fair compromise to me, but Father’s dark eyebrows drew together. “You will do as I command,” he said. “The Ocelot Kingdom needs you. Your sister needs you.”
“But she has you to advise her,” I pointed out.
Father’s eyes narrowed. “What plans do you have that are more important than finding a suitable man to help run the kingdom for the next several decades? Don’t you want a say in our clan’s fate?”
“Yes, but I also want a say in my own fate.”
Father’s hands closed into thick fists on the table. “You’re too old to run around the city like a child. Do you know how it looks for an unmarried woman to run with rough men—and a princess, no less? We will have to choose your husband soon. Do you imagine you’ll find one if you’ve been ruined by a common farmer?”
I gulped down my rage. How dare he insult Tadeu that way?
“There’s nothing more noble than honest work,” I said through gritted teeth. “Even if it gets your hands dirty and your shirt sweaty.”
“You will be at tonight’s dinner,” Father said, his voice soft with false pleasantness. I knew that voice. It meant I was about to get locked in my room for a week. “It will be good for you to be seen with your sister in a royal show of togetherness from our clan. You can entertain the Jaguar Court when your sister grows weary. You might even find a mate for yourself.”
“I’m a human,” I reminded him. “We don’t call it that.”
He gave me a look like I was a child throwing a tantrum. “Very well. A husband.”
“I don’t need some stuffy duke for a husband,” I said. “I’m a commoner. I should be able to choose my own husband like they do.”
“You may be human, but you’re much more useful than a commoner,” Father said. “You’ve been brought up with the best schooling so you can advise your sister. There’s no ordinary life for someone in your position, shifter or not.”
“Fine, you’re right,” I said. “You know I’ll be by Camila’s side every moment when she’s queen. But there’s no need for me to be there tonight.”
“Enough,” Father bellowed, his fist hitting the table so hard the silver tinkled against the fine china plates. “You are too headstrong for your own good. You do not make decisions in this room. You follow orders. Tonight, you will be at dinner on time, properly attired. I am the king, and these are my orders.”
“Perfect,” I said, barely able to contain myself. Oh, I wanted to yell back so bad.
He arched an eyebrow and studied me with suspicion, as if he couldn’t believe it had been so easy. But I’d learned what to expect from him long ago. He couldn’t stop being king for even a minute. He never had, not even for my mother. She’d always been a mother before a queen, but not Father. Sometimes I didn’t know if he even remembered that I was his daughter and not just another political pawn.
“Mark my words, Itzel,” he said slowly. “You will pay for your insolence.”
I held my anger in check. The sooner I stopped arguing, the sooner I could get out of there and warn Tadeu.
Four
The moment we walked out of the room, Camila began shaking, tears pooling in her eyes. “I'll never get the amulets,” she said. “And how can I find a mate if I can’t even get one amulet? I have to get all eight.”
“You’ve already got the ocelot one,” I pointed out. “And I’m sorry, but I really need to go see Tadeu. Just for a minute.”
Camila looked up at me with tear stained cheeks, hurt flickering across her face. “Now? I need your help. I’m no good at these games.”
I sighed. “Fine, we can figure this out first, but I need to see him today.”
“Itz, you can’t stop father from punishing him, whether you warn him or not. It’ll only make it worse if he knows. He’ll have all day to worry about it.” She broke off with a shudder. “I hate waiting for punishment.”
Somehow I doubted Camila’s idea of punishment compared to Tadeu’s. But then, I’d never been whipped, either. If anything, I lived a life of more privilege than Camila, enjoying the royal life without the burden of expectations the heir carried.
“Okay,” I said. “I’ll send a messenger.”
I glanced over my shoulder to where Gabor stood against the wall, his eyes blank as a stone soldier. Like all guards, he was a shifter, and though he was in our employ, I was technically lower status than him. Delivering a message was beneath a guard, and he might very well refuse me. Of all the guards, Gabor was probably not the one I wanted to insult by giving him a menial task. I was pretty sure his heart itself was stone.
“Come to my rooms first,” Camila said, sweeping off along the corridor. When we were inside, she turned to me and seized my hands in hers. “Come with me.”
I tilted my head, looking at her from the corner of my eye. “What do you mean?”
“To get the amulets,” she said. “From what Father told me about his Amulet Tour, it’s this adventure I’ll never forget. You can come with me.”
“Don’t you have to do it alone?”
“No. You can take whoever you want and get the amulets however you want. All that matters is that at the end, you have all eight. They fit together like…moving puzzle pieces. The one that moves to the center is the clan with your mate.”
“So, does Father choose your mate or does the amulet? I’ve never understood that part.”
“The amulet directs you to him,” she says. “But that’s not important now. Think about it, Itzel. We’ll go on our adventure together. And when I need you, you’ll be there.”
I had to admit it sounded fun. Because of our poor relations to other Feline Nations, and because of Father’s unpopularity with the other clans, I’d never even left the Ocelot Nation. This could be my chance. But I doubted Father would let me go. He’d want me to stay here and attend royal dinners in Camila’s absence.
And I’d have to leave Tadeu. Father had already threatened to send him away where I’d never find him. If I was gone, he’d have no one here to fight for him. It would be a perfect time for Father to reassign him or even trade him to some other nation if Camila made peace with them during her tour.
“I’ll think about it,” I said.
“Itz, I need you,” Camila said. “You… You make me stronger. I can’t get them without you.”
I could see where this was going. What she really meant was that she couldn’t get them, and she wanted me to get them for her. If Father let me, I’d probably do it, too. I wanted her to succeed. Of course, I also wanted to go hang out in the stables and talk to Tadeu while he worked. Sometimes, when no one else was around, he let me help him brush the horses or oil the saddles. And watching him was never boring. He was a masterpiece, whatever his station in our kingdom.
But my duty was to the Ocelot Nation. Whatever Father wanted, I would do. Not because I wanted to, but because I had no choice. He wasn’t just my controlling father. He was the king, a man who ordered executions for sport, and I was already on thin ice with him. Not that he’d kill his own daughter, but I wouldn’t put it above him to send me off to some faraway manor to live in isolation, or worse, a nunnery.
In truth, I depended on Camila as much as she depended on me. If it weren’t for my usefulness to her, Father probably would have sent me away a long time ago.
When we entered her rooms, she sent her ladies out and stood at the window looking down on the palace gardens. One day, she’d own this
place and everything in it, everyone in it. Even me.
This tour might be the last time I had a chance to do something. In less than a year, Camila would take the throne from Father, and the whole of the Ocelot Nation would change. Not just for the shifter clan, but the humans who lived in the country, too. If only I could find some way to keep protect both Tadeu and Camila, my decision would be easy. But of course, that couldn’t happen. I’d have to choose between them.
“I’ll ask Father about you attending my Amulet Tour,” Camila said.
I said nothing. I had to make myself useful, indispensable even. As a human, it was the only way to ensure my safety. Even my marriage couldn’t get Father much. No matter what he said, humans had little value in our kingdom, even royal ones. Shifters only married shifters, too, so I had no chance at increasing my station. I had achieved a human’s highest ambition the day my parents had forgotten to use a condom.
Five
By the time I got away, it was early evening. I had to hurry. Father wouldn’t tolerate my lateness tonight, not after I’d been absent the night before. If Camila failed to shine again tonight, the jaguars would think she was weak or sickly. She could always make the excuse that she hadn’t been well the night before, that she’d suffered a migraine or some other minor ailment. But two nights in a row was unheard of for a shifter. They didn’t get sick like humans.
I glanced over my shoulder as I slipped down the hall, away from my room. My maidservant had been incessantly attentive all day, no doubt under strict instructions not to let me out of her sight. I’d finally sent her for some jewels befitting tonight’s dinner. I slipped out the side door, my heart hammering as I passed Gabor. I glanced up in time to see his eyes flick away from me and back to their usual stare into the middle distance.
Damn it. Was he going to report me to Father?
You’re being paranoid, Itz, I scolded myself as I hurried away. Gabor knew my habits and probably thought nothing of seeing me slip away toward the stables.
I broke into a trot, though. I knew I wouldn’t have time to lose my virginity tonight—at least not now. Not unless I wanted my first time to be as special as one of the maids Tadeu fucked up against the wall and never spoke to again. I had no intention of letting him treat me that way. We’d been dancing around this for years. I’d been waiting for him to get tired of his little maids and realize that we were more than friends, that I wanted more than they did. I wanted all of him, not just his cock.
I wanted his cock, too, of course. Just the thought of it made my walls clench, heat blossoming between my thighs. Maybe I could sneak out later, after the dinner. To finally do it, to know that we were finally ready to say fuck the rules. We were going to be together, the king’s orders be damned. Tadeu might not be a duke, but he owned my heart. My father would just have to accept that we couldn’t be separated.
I did a quick sweep of the stables, but Tadeu was nowhere in sight. I could have asked another groom where to find him, but I didn’t want to draw attention to my whereabouts. If Father heard that I was in the stables asking for Tadeu, he’d chase me down himself.
But I couldn’t stand Tadeu up, couldn’t let him go to all the trouble of doing something special for me and not even bother to show up. Not for something this important. He’d think I hadn’t meant it, that it wasn’t important to me. That he wasn’t important to me.
Even if he fucked any girl who lifted her skirt long enough for him to whip out his cock and stuff it inside her, he knew what this meant to me. He knew that if I gave him my virginity, I meant it as a promise. And though he might be a rough stable hand who took girls’ virginity for sport, he wouldn’t do that to me. He cared about me enough that he wouldn’t take a gift like that from me without knowing the full weight of it. If he accepted my body, he would treasure it. If I was pledging myself by giving this gift, he was pledging himself by taking it.
I passed through the stables and out the back door, crossing the grass to the servants’ quarters. When Camila took over, I would tell her I’d already been with Tadeu, that no aristocrat would want spoiled goods like me. I would offer to help her, to remain behind the scenes, to be her most trusted advisor, if she let me choose my own husband. And did it really matter that he had no noble blood in his veins? After all, I was merely human, unable to shift, just as he was. We were a suitable match, no matter what King Ocelot said.
I jogged up the steps to the second floor of the building that housed the servants. It was simple but clean, with apartments off an exposed central walkway. I liked the openness of it, how the last rays of sunlight bathed the building like warm honey. Stopping at Tadeu’s door, I felt a flutter of uncertainty. If I made an excuse not to come to his room, he’d be hurt no matter how reasonable the excuse. It was still an excuse.
Maybe I’d blow off the dinner. To hell with my father. He could take it up with me afterwards, once the damage was done.
I tapped on the door, feeling uncharacteristically nervous. This was Tadeu, my best friend. He would take me gently, giving me the benefit of all the skill he possessed. And from what I’d heard, he possessed plenty. Now my thighs were quivering for different reasons. Picturing Tadeu’s long, delicious cock made my mouth water, and picturing it forcing its way inside me… My core clenched again at the thought.
Inside his room, I heard a hushed giggle. This time, it wasn’t my core that clenched. That bastard had a girl over when he was supposed to be getting ready for me? Knowing Tadeu, he’d laugh it off and tell me he’d last longer if he fucked her first. I’d heard all the stories he and his friends told. I knew how it worked. But to hell with being sloppy seconds.
Grinding my teeth, I threw open the door.
Two young maids stood so close I almost hit them with the door. One of them shrieked in surprise, and they spun around, clutching each other as if for protection. Tadeu was nowhere to be seen.
“What are you doing here?” I demanded, fisting my hands on my hips and hoping they didn’t notice I’d come in ready to punch my childhood friend for his uncouth behavior.
“N-nothing, Your Grace,” said one of the stable maids, curtseying and bowing her head. Dishwater blonde braids hung over her shoulders on either side. I’d seen her around, but she was too young to have played with me as a child.
“You must be doing something,” I said, striding into the room. The table was clean instead of cluttered with leather and metal parts from the stables. Two plates were set with the proper utensils. He’d even graced the center of the table with an elegant, tapered candle.
He’d totally stolen it from our kitchen. I recognized it as one of ours.
I wasn’t about to get all swoony in front of the maids, not with how castle gossip worked. But I was touched that he’d gone to so much trouble for me. I’d known he would take it seriously, but seeing it made a disturbingly gooey feeling start up in my chest. Pretty soon I’d be one of the gushy girls who talked of nothing but what boy she was infatuated with this week.
I gave the maids an expectant look, shaking off my weaker impulses. My mother had not been ruled by love, and I wouldn’t be, either. I had to stay strong for Camila, had to keep my head to protect her.
“We were just looking,” one of the maids assured me, backing toward the door.
“Looking at what?” I asked.
“We, um, we wanted…”
“To see,” the other one said. “Um, to see his apartment.”
I rolled my eyes, thinking they must be some of Tadeu’s little fans, girls who would giggle and swoon if he so much as swaggered by. If he told them to bend over, they’d ask how low. Not that I could blame them. I was about to give him my royal virginity, consequences be damned.
The girls curtsied again, then slipped out the door. I heard them both burst into hysterical, stifled giggling the moment they were out.
“Was it for her?” one of them said through her giggles. I glanced at the table where Tadeu had set out the plates for me, the candle st
ill unlit. He’d stolen for me. My heart got all mushy again.
But wait. Were they really there to see the macho Tadeu go all mushy for me?
I stuck my head out into the hall. “Hey,” I called. “Where’s Tadeu?”
The girls exchanged a glance. They couldn’t be more than fifteen, but I had no doubt that if they’d been giggling about Tadeu’s softer side, he’d already fucked them both.
“He’s not here,” the maid said. “He left this afternoon.”
I narrowed my eyes at her. “Where did he go?”
“The guards took him,” the other girl said.
My blood went cold as it drained from my face. “What? Where did they take him?”
“Oh, we don’t know that, Your Grace,” said one of the girls. I wanted to grab her by her braids and fling her down the stairs. But it wasn’t her fault that he was gone. It was mine.
No.
No, it wasn’t mine. It was Father’s.
Without a word, I marched past the girls and down the stairs, ignoring their whispers like the good princess I had never been. I may have looked regal and intimidating to them, but inside, my heart was racing so fast I didn’t know if I could make it to the castle without collapsing.
Keep walking, I commanded myself. Don’t look back. Don’t run.
Tadeu. What had Father done with him? He couldn’t have sent him away already. Not without letting me say goodbye. Not without telling me where he was. In nine short months, my sister turned twenty and took over the crown from Father. Then I would get him back. I would marry him and make him royalty, give him the life he deserved after the hardships he’d endured under my father.
By the time I made it back inside the castle, my legs were steady. I had purpose. I strode past Father’s guards even as they protested. They might scold me, tell me he was in a meeting and had asked not to be disturbed, but they wouldn’t stop me. I was his daughter, after all. Not only that, but I was the human one, the one who was no threat even when I was fuming mad.
Broken Princess: A Dark Paranormal Romance (Feline Royals Book 1) Page 3
