by Kennedy Fox
“Kiera, stop,” I demand firmly, looking into her tear-filled green eyes. “Why are you here? Isn’t your husband and everyone waiting for you?”
Her chest rises and falls as she tries catching her breath. I watch as she licks her lips and stares up at me. “I couldn’t marry him.”
All the air is sucked out of my lungs, and it takes me a minute to process her words.
“What?” I ask, releasing her arms. They drop to her side, and she shrugs in response. “You left?” My voice cracks with sudden emotion that the whiskey was supposed to take away.
“Why, Jackson?” she asks, ignoring my question. “Why would you wait fifteen years to tell me how you felt?”
I blink again, taking a step back before stepping closer. “What are you talkin’ about?” After I kissed her last night, she told me I was too late and stormed off, so I’m genuinely confused at her outburst right now.
“Your letter,” she confirms. “Why would you wait till my wedding day to give that to me? You know how much I want to hate you right now? This should be the happiest day of my life, and you decide this was the right moment to finally confess your feelings for me after all this time? First, you kiss me the night of my wedding rehearsal, and even after I tell you that you’re too late, you decide to give me a letter on the day I’m supposed to get married! I waited years for you…years for you to tell me those exact words you wrote on paper and now—”
“Wait,” I stop her, holding up a hand. “What letter?” I have no idea what she’s talking about and even though I’ve been drinking all morning, I know I didn’t give her anything.
The fire in her eyes tells me she’s ready to blow up at me, but I’m confused as fuck right now.
Kiera bends and reaches inside her boot, pulling out a folded-up piece of paper. “This one.” She smacks it in my palm. “It’s your handwriting.”
I open it up and scan my eyes down the paper. Oh my God. It’s my handwriting all right, but I didn’t give this to her. “I threw this in the trash,” I mutter to myself. “How’d you get this?”
Brushing a hand through my hair, I’m just as surprised as she is about this. She was never supposed to read this.
“I found it in my purse this morning. It came in an envelope with just my name on it.”
I sigh. “Motherfuckers.”
“What?” she asks, panicked. “Please tell me someone else didn’t write this and pretend to be you.” She tilts her head up as if she’s trying to hold back more tears. “I can’t believe after all this time I’d assume you’d ever say those words to me. I should’ve known…I should’ve fucking known that you’d never—”
“I wrote it,” I blurt out, grabbing her attention back to me. “I wrote every damn word, Kiera.”
“You did?” she asks, breathlessly.
“Of course I fuckin’ did. Tanner and John told me to write a letter to you and get all my feelings or some shit out so I could finally let you go. I’d been drinking and decided they were right. But I tossed it afterward.” I scrub my hands down my face, contemplating kicking their asses or hugging them for this stunt. “One of them must’ve grabbed it that night. It’s the only way it ended up in your purse.”
“Did you mean what you wrote? That you’re letting me go? That you would never be good enough for me?”
The pain is evident on her face, and I have to look down at our feet to avoid it from burning into my eyes.
“Jackson, answer me,” she demands. “Did you really think I needed anything other than you? The fancy dates, the flashy cars, and dinners—I never wanted any of that.”
“It’s what you deserved,” I tell her matter-of-factly. “Someone who could give you more than I ever could.”
“You’re so goddamn stupid.” She shakes her head at me, closing the space between us, and then places her palm against my chest. “I was in love with you. When Tanner asked me out, I wanted you to fight for me, to give me a reason to say no. But you never did. Not once.”
“I couldn’t…” My voice cracks again before I can finish. Inhaling a deep breath, I continue. “I knew I’d only hold you back, Kiera. You went off to college and found a career that you were destined for. I didn’t want to keep you here when you wanted to go off to school and experience life outside of this small town. I only ever wanted what was best for you. I wanted you to be happy.”
“And you thought I’d be happier without you?” She removes her hand, taking a small step back. “Why were you the one to make that decision for me, Jackson? Didn’t you understand how much I loved you? You let me go and broke my heart more times than I can count. I didn’t want to be in love with you, but I couldn’t stop. Even when I had guys chasing after me, I only ever wanted you.”
“Kiera…” I don’t know what to say that I haven’t already. She turns around, and I’m afraid she’ll walk away for good this time. “I’m sorry, okay?” I grab her arm, pulling her back. “I never wanted to hurt you, and I know that I did, which is why I drank and did so much stupid shit. I didn’t want anyone or you to know how much I hated myself that I couldn’t give you more.”
“Jackson…” she says just above a whisper, bringing her body flush against mine. “I loved you when I was fifteen years old, and I still love you. Regardless of your stupidity, the pain you’ve put me through, the emotional roller coasters I felt over the years—I’m in love with you. I couldn’t care less about all the materialistic things you think I deserve. I only ever wanted you to love me back.” The tears in her eyes are fucking destroying me. “I couldn’t marry him when my heart had already belonged to you.”
“Are you kiddin’ me?” Her words send an electric spark through me I’ve never felt before. I can’t keep lying to her or myself. “I’ve always been in love with you, Pippi. I never fucking stopped.” Before she says another word, I wrap a hand around the back of her neck and crash our mouths together in a desperate kiss. I taste her and slide my tongue between her lips, wanting and needing more of her. It’s a kiss for the goddamn record books because nothing could fucking top this. Kiera kisses me as if her life depends on it, and by the way it makes my body feel, I know she’s the only girl I ever want to kiss for the rest of my life. My arms snake around her waist to hold her in place because I’m not letting her get away this time. I pour years of longing into this kiss, wanting her to feel every ounce of regret I feel for pushing her away.
“Kiera…” I whisper against her lips, resting my forehead on hers. This feels so right. Something inside me finally breaks from holding back. “I love you. More than anything. Always have, always will.”
She pulls back slightly, her hands covering her mouth as tears pour down her cheeks. I’m not sure if she’s smiling or preparing to murder me, but I take my chances.
“I’m sorry I waited so long to tell you. I’ve always loved you,” I tell her sincerely, cupping her cheek.
“I honestly thought the day would never come,” she admits, dropping her hands and revealing a wide smile. “I mean, your timing kinda sucks…”
“Fuck, I know.” I lean back and tilt my head toward the sky. “I really screwed this up for you.”
“I’m pretty sure everyone is freaking out. I basically just walked out on my own wedding.”
“Wait…when did you read the letter?”
“About five minutes before we left the house. Then as soon as I saw you weren’t standing up there, I knew exactly where to find you.”
“You left during the wedding?” I gasp. “Holy fuck, Kiera.”
“You’re not helping right now.” She playfully swats at me. “I just left a man at the altar. I’ve probably just broken his heart and humilated him in front of everyone we know.”
Hearing the remorse in her voice and seeing the fear of what’s to come written on her face, I hate that shit is about to get really messy for her—for us. I want to be with Kiera more than anything, but I know this isn’t going to be easy.
But hell, when has it ever been easy
?
“What do you need me to do? I’ll do whatever you ask to help get you through this. I’m sure your parents are freaking out.”
“I just need you to be with me right now, okay?” She rests her palm on my face and pulls our mouths together for a soft kiss. “I’ll go back in a few hours when everyone’s gone.”
“They’re going to worry about you,” I tell her, though spending some uninterrupted time with her sounds amazing.
“Emily knows,” she says. “She ran after me to give me Evan’s keys. I’m sure she’s handling everything.”
And just like that, Emily is my new favorite sister.
I smirk as I pull her lips back to mine. “Remind me to thank her later.”
“Stop being so damn cocky.” She laughs, melting her body into mine, and it’s a feeling I never want to be without again.
“It’s the charm, baby. It can’t be stopped.” I kiss her jawline, and my lips linger along her ear and neck. Kiera noticeably shivers in my arms, and though we’ll be going back to a shitstorm, I can’t wipe the smile off my face.
“Jackson,” she whimpers. “Truth or dare?”
I freeze in place, my mouth on her collarbone. “You can’t be serious.”
“You know the rules,” she teases, and when I bring my eyes to hers, I see she is.
“I was just kissing your neck, my dick is hard as fuck, and you want to play a twelve-year-old’s game?”
Her eyes lower to my crotch, and the corner of her lips tilt up in a devilish smile.
“Play the game or face the consequences,” she reminds me with a smug grin.
At this point, I’ll do whatever she asks me if that means I can go back to kissing her.
“Fine,” I say, shaking my head in disbelief. “Truth.”
“Are you sure about this?”
“Well, it’s gotta be better than dare. Lord knows what you’d make me do.” I chuckle, remembering all the shit she used to dare me when we were kids.
“No, no.” She shakes her head at me. “Are you sure about this—you and me? I know you just confessed your undying love for me, but I can’t just be another notch on your bedpost, and everyone is going to be betting against us when the shit hits the fan. Rumors, speculation, all of it. You have any idea what’s about to happen?”
“Kiera…” I hold her hands in mine and look into her eyes so she can see my sincerity. “I don’t care what other people think, say, or do. I only care about you and what you want. I’m sure people will speculate, the rumor mills are probably already in motion, and people will be waiting for me to fuck this up—but I’m all in, Pippi. I want whatever you’re willing to give me, good and bad. I never wanted anyone else, and I know I did a shit job of showing that, but I’ve never been surer of anything in my life that you are it for me. You always have been, and if you’re giving me a chance to finally get this right, I’m going in one hundred percent.”
It’s the sincerest thing I’ve ever said, and I meant it with my whole heart. Kiera is my life, my world, and I’d do anything to make her happy. She’s looking at me with tears in her eyes, and her bottom lip quivers as she stares at me. I hope she can see how much I want to be the guy she deserves, and I’ll spend every day proving myself to her that I am.
“That’s…” She puts a hand to my chest, right over my heart. “That’s the Jackson I always knew. The side you never shared with anyone but me. The sweet, kind, and compassionate side. Everyone thought I was crazy for being in love with you, but they didn’t know you like I do.”
I grab her hand and bring it to my mouth, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. “That part of me was only ever reserved for you.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Kiera
I’m living in a dream.
It’s the only explanation for today’s turn of events.
Leaving Trent at the altar was something I never thought I was capable of doing. Jackson finally confessing fifteen years’ worth of love to me and promising me the world is something I’ll never forget for the rest of my life. My emotions are boiling over, and I’m not quite sure how to react to it all. I’m pretty sure I’m in a state of shock as Jackson tells me he loves me. I waited years for this very moment, and now that he’s standing in front of me saying the most beautiful words to me, I don’t want to ever leave. We’re in our own perfect bubble, and when it’s just him and me, things are the way they should’ve always been.
Except I know as soon as I go back home, a shitstorm will be waiting for me. It’s my fault that Trent is heartbroken, guests are confused, and my family is completely humiliated. I know deep down that marrying Trent would’ve ultimately ended badly, considering how the past few months have been. I was in deep denial. I realize I was so willing to forgive him and look past his flaws because I wanted a family, but at the end of the day, my heart always belonged to someone else. I just never imagined I’d hear the words I’ve dreamed about all this time.
Jackson had nothing to do with the choices Trent made or how he lied to me. But him kissing me last night and then me receiving that note this morning made me realize I was making the wrong decision. The feelings I felt couldn’t be ignored.
“I think it’d be best if we didn’t come out and tell people about us right away, though,” I say. Worrying how hurtful that might sound, I continue, “Until the shock wears off. I’m already going to be apologizing to Trent and our families for weeks, but I know nothing I ever do or say will make up for what I did. It’s kinda unforgivable.”
“So you want to wait?” he asks.
“Well, I want to wait until we’re seen together in public or admit anything to anyone. Is that okay?” I ask nervously. “Just out of respect for Trent, ya know? He’s already going to be hurt enough and super pissed. I don’t want to add fuel to the fire. Time is needed for things to settle down. After it’s all blown over, then we can start telling people we’re together.”
“So…we’re together?” he teases with a mischievous grin. Wrapping his arms around my waist, he pulls me to his chest and buries his face in my neck. I inhale his scent of whiskey and soap, and I want to cling to him for hours. “Or would you rather wait another fifteen years?”
“Jackson!” I pull back and slap at his chest. He makes me teary-eyed one moment and laughing the next. That’s the Jackson I know, though. “That’s not even funny!” I say, chuckling at his antics.
“Oh come on. I’m hilarious, and you know it.” He tilts my chin and softly kisses me. “I’ll do whatever you ask me to. But if Trent thinks for one second he can win you back, I’m stepping in.”
“Well, he probably will. I mean, I don’t see him just walking away, which is why I need you to be the bigger person here. Let me handle it, and once the dust clears, we can make it known it’s only you and me,” I tell him.
“How long are we talkin’ here? Like a day or two?” he mocks.
“A month. At least.”
He groans in disapproval but doesn’t argue.
“But…” I add with a cheeky grin. “We could always sneak around. Might be kinda fun if no one knows. Feel like we’re teenagers all over again.”
“Hmm…” he contemplates, pulling me closer. “I could probably get on board with that. We have years of acting like teenagers to make up for.”
“We sure do,” I say. “You can sneak me into your bedroom once the sun goes down, and we can make out in the stalls, so no one sees us.” I grin at him, knowing he’ll definitely be on board with this idea.
“You’ve always been my best kept secret, Pippi.” He winks. “But if Trent flatout asks me, I’m not lying. I won’t answer, but I won’t say no either.”
“He won’t ask you,” I say. “Least I don’t think so. He’ll probably ask me because he’s already made comments about it in the past, but if he’s smart, he won’t bring it up again.”
Jackson snorts, rolling his eyes. “Trent’s not smart. If he were, he’d keep his distance.”
Now I’m the
one snorting and rolling my eyes. “What is with you men and all your caveman tendencies?”
“I gotta brand you, baby. Make sure everyone knows you’re mine now.” Jackson slides his hand down to my ass and squeezes. It makes me yelp in surprise. He’s teased and flirted with me plenty before, but having his hands on me—the way I’ve always imagined and dreamed—is making it damn hard to control myself around him.
“Down boy,” I tease, pushing him away.
“Don’t worry. I’ve waited this long. I’m sure I can wait a bit longer. Maybe.”
“Well, I mean…I’m not saying we have to be celibate.”
“No, but we’re gonna take this slow, baby.” His eyes are so warm and caring that I nearly get lost in them. “You’re not just a notch on my bedpost, Kiera. As much as I want to rip this wedding dress off you and christen the back of Evan’s truck, I don’t want to rush this with you. I’m not screwing this up. Not this time.”
“Wait…” I try to wrap my mind around what he just said. “How do you know Evan and Emily haven’t already done it in the back?”
“That’s the part you’re focusing on?” He laughs. “Because they’re both germaphobe freaks. I mean, maybe. But I’m pretty good at knowing that stuff.”
“You and your brothers have a strange relationship,” I tease. “Also…” I continue, contemplating my next words carefully. “You’re gonna make me wait to have you. Is that what you’re saying?”
“Yes, ma’am. I’m not just a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am kind of thing,” he mocks lightheartedly, grabbing my wrists before I can push him again. He takes my hands and wraps them around his waist and secures me against his chest. “We kinda skipped the whole dating thing, so I want to do this right. You deserve that, Kiera. Let me give that to you. Please.” He dips down and kisses the top of my nose so soft and sweet.
