by Riley Moreno
"This is why it has to be this way," He said gently, "A side-effect of the antidote that your grandfather exchanged for his fortune. I am afraid that if my bare skin was to touch yours, the pain would be unbearable.
Vanna looked into his eyes and noticed a kindness that had replaced what she had thought was indifference. Now she could see that it was not indifference that Jarab had felt, but worry. She was silent for a few minutes. Her mind churned as she processed this new turn of events. She finally spoke.
"If I am not to have your physical affection, can I at least have your friendship?"
"What are your terms for this friendship?"
"Conversation. I want to know about you. I want to learn about Alpha Aquila if it is to be my new home, and I want to be a more than a vessel and provider of nourishment to my children. I want to be their mother, and I want you to be their father." Now it was Jarab 's turn to be silent. She knew that she had no right to ask these things of him, but she could not help doing so. In the back of her mind, something told her that Jarab would agree to her conditions. He must be lonely as well. Of course, he had Lucien and she did as well she supposed, but still she desperately hoped that he would give in.
"You have my word" He agreed. "I can allow you an hour of conversation each day. You must understand that I have so much work to accomplish. I have done much in the years that we were awaiting your arrival but there is still much more to do."
"One hour" Vanna agreed. She stood up and submitted herself to Jarab 's procedure.
The egg harvest had left Vanna sore and exhausted. Her home provided her with the nourishment and rest that her body required in order to recover. Lucien had provided the promised extra blanket and had visited her in her bedroom for countless hours on end. He entertained her with many stories. Her favorites were tales of Jarab when he was a young boy. Through Lucien's eyes she began to get to know Jarab in a different way, a prankster who loved to get the better of others, but then always made up for his follies through kindness.
Jarab came every day for the allotted hour and although he was tense and distracted at the beginning, and always left when exactly 60 minutes had passed, it was the highlight of Vanna's day. She told him tales of her family back on earth. She recounted childhood tales of Clarissa and Isobel and confided that she had loved her sisters fiercely, but that she had always felt like an outsider. Vanna told Jarab about her parents, how close and in love, they had been when she was young. They had showered their affections on Vanna in her youth but she could not help but feel like an outsider to their bond as well. She cried as she told Jarab how devastated she had been when her mother had died, and how her devastation could not even compare to the amount of grief that had then, and still did, surround her father like a storm cloud.
Jarab in turn told Vanna about his youth on Alpha Aquila. He spun tales about his happy childhood. He had been the oldest child in the Royal Family; his parents had 8 children all together. 4 male and 4 female. Lucien had served as his protector and was often kept busy smoothing over his blunders when Jarab had played one too many jokes. Jarab did not talk about the war that had killed so many of his people, nor the plague that wiped out the rest, including his family. She once asked him how he had felt to receive the antidote provided by her grandfather. His face had clouded over and he mumbled out a one word reply. "Unworthy"
Jarab told Vanna that he purposely left the interior of her palace as a blank canvas and that she was free to do whatever she wanted with it.
"Can I plant a garden in my courtyard" she asked.
"Of course, I will provide you with the necessary seeds.
He did and Vanna planted grass that was softer and greener than any she had lain on back on Earth. It was a special variety of Jarab 's creation that once grew to the desired length, never required mowing or weeding. She cultivated flowers more vibrant and beautiful than those in her garden at home. Her favorite was a glittering pink blossom with an amethyst center that bloomed every morning to the size of a dinner plate. She told Jarab which flower she preferred and asked what it was called. He smiled in delight.
"It is my own creation," he admitted, "The first night that we met I went directly back to my laboratory and developed it." Vanna was shocked that he had even remembered that night. He had seemed so stiff and indifferent.
"What did you name it?" she asked.
"Vanna" he blushed not meeting her gaze.
After a few weeks, Vanna's body had recovered enough to attempt the first implantation of her and Jarab 's offspring. Lucien met her at her palace and accompanied her to the laboratory. He smiled when he saw her. Vanna was taken aback by his appearance. Although Lucien's smile was as bright as ever, his face looked ashen and gray and his eyes had lacked the luminescent glitter that Vanna noticed upon their first meeting.
"Are you feeling alright Lucien?" she asked.
"Of course my dear" he answered. "Do not worry about me. I am not the one who will be going through a medical procedure today."
"Are you certain?"
"So certain that I have saved a special treat in order to entertain you with on our way to the laboratory."
Vanna was excited. She wondered what the special treat could be. Lucien and Rigi had provided her with every comfort that she could have imagined and more. She looked at him with greedy anticipation.
"The treat is a tale," He began, "a tale that I wish you to hold dear to your heart and always remember."
"Of course"
"I accompanied Jarab while he was fighting in the Great War with Rathbus. His father did not wish for him to fight, but when he saw how determined Jarab was to fight he agreed upon one condition. I was to accompany him with the understanding that I would sacrifice my own life if it meant that I could save Jarab 's. I would have without even being asked. That is how much I care for Jarab. Fortunately, it never came to that. Jarab was proved to be such a fierce and calculated warrior that he came out of every battle without so much as a scratch. I believe that it was because of the many years he had spent scheming to play jokes on others that he was able to be so successful. Jarab had studied the behaviors of others so well that he would anticipate their every move."
Vanna was so engrossed in Lucien's tale that she had nearly forgotten to be nervous about the procedure.
"That is perhaps why it was such a shock when his father summoned for his swift return back to Alpha Aquila. Jarab did not know why he had been taken from battle. The war was about to be won and Jarab wanted to be there to witness the victory. His father called him to his private chamber and I accompanied him. What his father told Jarab is the other side of the tale that your father told you. Jarab had been away from home for so long that he was unaware of the plague that was devastating his beloved people. He was shocked when his father reported that over 75% of the Aquiline had passed away. He told him that he himself had been exposed and that he would be dead by the end of the week. Then the final blow came. His father held out a vial filled with a clear liquid and commanded Jarab to drink it. Jarab guessed what the vial contained and so he refused. He told his father that he would not drink the antidote and begged him to give it to one of his brothers instead. His father was enraged. He told Jarab that as the first-born, it was his duty to partake of the antidote and repopulate Alpha Aquila along with the female mother that was to arrive from Earth. Then his father became weak and exhausted. He made me vow that I would make sure that Jarab carried out the task and left the room.
Jarab refused. I begged him, I threatened him. I did everything that I could. Finally I asked him if there was anything that I could do to make him change his mind. Jarab held the vial out to me and asked me to drink it in his place. He said that Alpha Aquila would be a better planet if I was to father the next generation instead of him. Of course, I could not. It was below my station. I had vowed to sacrifice myself in order to save Jarab and I would not go back on my word. We were at a standstill. If neither of us drank the potion, then Alpha Aquila would be lef
t empty and become vulnerable to any race that were to conquer it first. Perhaps even the Rathbus that we had fought to valiantly keep at bay.
I could only think of one solution. I opened Jarab 's father's cabinet and pulled out two metal chalices. The metal that the chalices were made from was as precious to our planet as gold is to yours. I then took out my flask and poured my own ration of water into one of the chalices, then took the antidote from Jarab 's hand and poured it in the other. I told him that I would close my eyes and he was to place both chalices on his father's desk. I would select one chalice to drink from and he would select the other. This was not the best plan I admit but it was all that I could think of at the time. Jarab agreed and we made an oath to not tell another soul of the bargain that we struck."
"What happened Lucien, what happened next?" Vanna asked, tingling with anticipation.
"We both drank. At first I thought that I tasted a hint of something besides water, but when I saw the grimace on Jarab 's face as he swallowed the vile liquid, I knew that I had made the right choice. We both drank until our glasses were empty and held them out for the other to see. 'You made the right choice' I told him 'My chalice contained only water. It is how it should be.' Jarab smiled at me and said 'You are mostly right Lucien, except for one thing. Your chalice did not contain only water, it contained mostly water. A small portion of the antidote flows through your veins. You will not leave me alone any time soon Lucien.'"
Vanna understood now why Lucien had not been among the millions that had died from the plague. She also gained deeper insight into Jarab 's character. She was beginning to soften towards him. She saw through Lucien's eyes that Jarab could be caring and loyal. She just did not know how to be the recipient of his affections.
"Why Lucien do I not feel scorched by your touch as I do Jarab 's?"
"Because I am afraid that the small portion of the antidote that I received has fought the plague off, but has no effect on my age. I am nearing the end of my time on Alpha Aquila. Death is near. I can feel it lingering outside my door. I am thankful that I will not be leaving Riji alone, now that you are here to take care of him.
Vanna kissed Lucien on the cheek and then made her way into Jarab 's laboratory. She felt the weight of responsibility that Lucien had placed upon her shoulders. She would need to be the one to take care of Jarab now. She knew that the best way to lift his heavy burden would be a successful implantation. If she could carry and bear a child, Jarab could finally see the fruits of his many years of lonely labor.
Jarab met Vanna in a treatment room and prepared her for implantation.
"Are you ready?" He asked. There was tenderness in his eyes that Vanna had not seen before.
"Yes" She said as the medicine that was to put her to sleep began to make her drowsy. As she drifted off to sleep she thought that she felt Jarab grasp her hand. It felt warmer to the touch than a human hand would, but it did not scorch her skin. Vanna was perplexed. Before she could make sense of the sensation, drowsiness so powerful that it could not be ignored caused her to enter into a deep slumber.
The implantation was a success. Jarab shared the good news with Vanna as soon as she awoke. She was happy and excited to become a new mother, but did not feel as if she was truly carrying the seed of Jarab. She did not know if she could ever become used to the scientific way of procreation, but she would do anything to make Jarab happy. She had felt herself warming up to him and growing fonder of him with each brief one-hour visit. She hoped that he felt the same, and the way that he was looking at her now caused her to believe that this might be the case.
"You need to rest Vanna, there is still a chance that the pregnancy will terminate if your body rejects the implantation. All of the tests that I have performed indicate that we can be hopeful. Still, I would rather keep you safe.
She was glad, so very glad. She remembered the sensation that she felt as she drifted off to sleep.
" Jarab, I thought that I felt you grasp my hand."
Jarab looked and quickly turned back to her heartbeat monitor.
"Vanna, you know that is impossible." It was Lucien. Vanna had not seen him before, he was standing in the back of the room and looking as proud as her father had when he had told Vanna that her mother was expecting twins.
Vanna felt foolish. She realized now that Jarab 's tender caress had been too much to hope for. Her skin still tingled from the sensation. Vanna decided that it could have been a hallucination. Maybe it had felt so real because it was her heart's greatest desire.
" Jarab, you have much more work to complete, let me accompany Vanna back to her bed."
Jarab agreed without turning around.
Lucien scarcely looked as if he could make the journey to her palace from the laboratory himself, but Vanna was too weak to protest. Lucien helped her up and Jarab turned around.
"Thank you Vanna," Jarab appeared to be holding back a flood of tears. "You have no idea what this means to me. To Alpha Aquila.
"I would do anything for you Jarab " Vanna admitted. "Anything that you asked"
Again, Jarab turned and hid his face.
Lucien helped Vanna home and to her bedroom. Vanna did not feel tired enough to sleep. She also did not wish for Lucien to leave quite yet. The journey had exhausted him.
"Will you sit with me in my courtyard?" She asked "There is a task that I have been saving for this day."
Lucien agreed and Vanna helped guide him toward a bench. She went back into her bedroom and located the frock that she had worn on her journey to Alpha Aquila. She reached inside the pocket and removed a cherry pit that she had placed inside months before. She brought it outside and showed it to Lucien.
"It is from my mother's garden. I wanted to plant it here on my new home the same day that life was planted inside of me."
"What a beautiful sentiment. My darling you never cease to amaze me. I shall watch you from here."
Vanna bent down to the spot that she had set aside. She dug up a portion of the earth. The scent of the soil smelled earthy, like the soil from home, but somehow sweet as well. She did not know if the seed would grow into a tree, just as she did not know that the seed growing inside her now would develop into Jarab's and her child. All she could do was hope. She placed the pit into the ground and began covering it with dirt when she began to feel a sharp pain in her side. She was scared. She turned and screamed
"Lucien! Go get Jarab!"
All that Vanna remembered was snippets. She remembered the look of panic on Lucien's face. She remembered falling to the ground. She remembered touching her warm and sticky blood. She remembered Jarab scooping her into his arms. She remembered feeling like a failure.
Her pregnancy had terminated. She had failed. Lucien told her that they could try again, that first attempts were rarely successful.
"Jarab will learn from this" He had assured her.
Vanna wasn't so sure. She told Lucien and Jarab that she wanted no visitors. She spent days in her bedroom sobbing uncontrollably. She told Jarab that he was relieved from their agreed upon daily visits and implored Lucien to get some much-needed rest. She was afraid that he would never recover from the strain of that awful day. He had ran back to the lab to fetch Jarab without precaution. Vanna could not bear the thought that Lucien would soon be gone and she would be all that Jarab had left. She had failed. She had failed her father and her sisters. She had failed Lucien, who had been so kind to her. She had failed Alpha Aquila. Most importantly, she had failed Jarab.
Vanna looked out her window to the sapling that began to emerge where she had planted the cherry pit. She felt as if the tiny tree was mocking her. She got out of bed and stormed over to it, intending to pull it from the soil and ending its life suddenly as the life that she had hoped would grow within her. As she made a fist around the sapling, a warm hand covered her own.
"Please don't Vanna" It was Jarab.
Vanna unclenched the sapling and looked up at him.
"I am so sorry Jarab. I
failed you. I am strong enough to try again whenever you are ready."
Jarab brushed her cheek with the back of his hand. Vanna's eyes widened as she fully realized what he was doing. She had imagined this moment so many times before that it felt so natural; she had almost forgotten that it was supposed to be impossible.
"How are you touching me?"
"I am touching you because I can't help myself." He answered. "Vanna, from the moment you opened the door, my hands have ached to do nothing but touch your skin."
"But how is it possible? I thought that you did not care for me. You were always in a rush to leave?"
"I was in a rush," he agreed "But only to get back to the laboratory so that I could invent a cure for this terrible side effect. I have been working tirelessly to ensure that when I touched you, you would not feel an ounce of pain, only pleasure."
"But I have failed you"
"No my darling, it was I who failed you. I spent so many years dreading our meeting. I hated my father for the responsibility he laid at my feet when he gave me the antidote. I had been watching Lucien die slowly, and hating myself for drinking the larger portion of the cure."
He was seated now on the lawn. Vanna climbed onto his lap and wrapped her legs around her torso. She put her head on his shoulders and he stroked her hair as he gently rocked her back and forth. Vanna felt so warm. Every inch of her skin was flushing from Jarab 's touch.
"I was a fool to think that science could replace a connection of the flesh. Vanna I was relieved when the implantation was unsuccessful. As you were falling asleep and I dared to reach out and touch your hand, you looked up at me and gazed into my eyes for a split second. I knew then that you cared for me as I care for you and I was ready to terminate the procedure. I did not wish to merge our cells together in this cold sterile way but then Lucien came in with such a hopeful look in his eyes and I was afraid I would disappoint him so I went through with it. I am sorry that I caused you so much pain and grief.