by Leslie Chase
I am not going to let myself have that false hope.
If he let himself believe he'd met his mate and then turned out to be wrong, he didn't think he'd be able to survive it. He'd lost too much already. The trouble was that, no matter what he told himself, his soul knew straight away that she was the one for him. He forced that feeling down, back into the darkness from which he'd just woken, and reached up for a handhold to pull himself to his feet. I have to get out of here.
The woman spun around as he moved, squeaking and dropping the communicator as she jumped. It hit the floor with a crash, bouncing under a table and out of reach. A voice squawked from it, crackling with static, but Zardan couldn't make out the words.
"You're alive," the woman said accusingly as she backed away from him. Her eyes were wide, and she lifted a heavy wrench from the table, hefting it like a club. Zardan felt his pulse quicken at the challenge and couldn't help grinning as he pulled himself up.
Or tried to, anyway. As soon as he lifted himself from the nest of blankets, the pain from his wounds shot through him like a blinding bolt of lightning. He could barely hold in a cry of pain as he let himself sink back, slowly. Okay, I have to heal first, then get out of here, he amended his plan.
He hadn't taken his injuries into account, but it felt as though they were worse than he'd thought. The slightest movement of his wings was painful.
"Where am I?" he asked slowly, as the human lowered her makeshift weapon. She stepped closer, staying carefully out of arm's reach.
"You're at the Willis ice farm," she told him. Her brow furrowed as she looked down at him, a gesture that Zardan found impossibly cute. "My home. I'm Gillian Willis. Now who the hell are you and what are you doing here?"
"Zardan," he replied, trying to bow without moving too much. Even nodding his head hurt, but he owed her that dignity at least. I should give my full name. "I am Zardan, Lord of Herendar, Flight Commander of the Dragon Guard. I believe I owe you a life-debt."
Retreating into formality was the best he could do to hide his feelings while he tried to sort them out. And it was true, anyway: he owed her his life. He had no idea how she could have brought him to this place, or where it was. Whatever she’d done, though, she’d gotten him here in the nick of time. The burning pain in his lungs told him that he'd gone too long without air.
The question is, what is my life worth these days? It was a bleak question, but it matched his sense of humor and he laughed. It instantly turned into a cough, and the human female — Gillian, he reminded himself of her odd, alien name — looked on with concern.
"I don't know about your life-debts," Gillian said, putting down her wrench and lifting a glass of water from a nearby table. "But I do know that you saved me too. From those dragons."
Her expression darkened, anger and fear flashing across her face in quick succession. Zardan saw her knuckles whiten around the glass, and she froze in place for a moment. Then, getting her feeling under control, she smiled. It wasn't a particularly convincing smile, but he had to applaud the effort. I don't think she's ever been that close to death before, Zardan realized. No wonder it had shaken her up.
"Here, have something to drink," she said, holding the glass out gingerly as though she was afraid he might bite. Zardan almost laughed at her caution. From the way his hand trembled as he tried to accept it, he could hardly have attacked her if he wanted too. When he tried to lift the glass from Gillian's grip it almost slipped from his hands, and if she hadn't caught it he'd have dropped it.
Her little frown deepened, and she bent down to put the glass to his lips, steadying it as he drank. The cold, pure water gave him strength and he gulped it down greedily. It wasn't just the water that made him feel better. Gillian was close enough that he could feel the warmth of her skin, and the look in her eyes as she watched him told him she felt something too. Just for a moment his soul was at peace as he looked up at her.
He'd almost finished drinking when the crash of a door slamming open interrupted them. Gillian jumped to her feet, the glass flying from her hand and smashing into a thousand pieces on the floor as she spun around. Zardan was on his feet in an instant, the agony of moving nothing compared to his urge to place himself between Gillian and harm. He shoved her down onto the blankets as he turned to face the danger head-on.
"Get away from her!" Standing in the doorway was a young human male, holding a gun nearly as big as he was. It was clearly too heavy for him, shaking in his hands, and it was that more than anything else which stopped Zardan from charging him. A bullet from that weapon might harm or even kill him if it hit — but he'd take that chance if he had to. If the boy missed, though, and the shot hit Gillian instead... Zardan wouldn't take that risk with her life.
His eyes narrowed and he bared his teeth, trying to keep his pain and weakness from showing. The human met his gaze, rage, fear, and confusion mixing in his expression. Not a good combination, Zardan thought. A man feeling all of that would lose control of himself easily, and that made him dangerous to deal with.
"Harry," Gillian said from behind him, her voice angry and tired at the same time. "Put the gun down before someone gets hurt."
Zardan was suddenly glad he hadn't charged into battle. Whoever this was, Gillian knew him well enough to be exasperated rather than frightened by this display. Ripping the young human's head off was probably not going to win Zardan any points with her.
"I heard you scream over the radio, so I came as fast as I could," Harry said uncertainly. The muzzle of the gun wavered, too heavy for him to keep straight for long, and Zardan grudgingly admired the boy. Just like him, the boy had leaped to Gillian's aid, and he had to respect that, even if the boy was too young to do it effectively.
No, that's unfair too, he decided. That gun might be too big for him to fire safely, and if he tries he will hurt himself. But if he hits me, I'll be a lot worse off. He's doing a better job of protecting her than most would.
"I got a fright, that was all," Gillian said. She didn't seem to share his enthusiasm for the boy's behavior, sounding more irritated than pleased. "Now put that damned gun down, I don't want to have to deal with another emergency today. Zardan, please tell my idiot brother that I'm not in any danger."
"Gillian is perfectly safe. I am not going to hurt anyone," Zardan confirmed, warily watching for any sign that the boy was about to pull the trigger. Instead, Harry let the muzzle drop to point at the floor, face flushing. As soon as the danger was passed, Zardan sagged against the mining machine beside him with a groan, barely managing to catch a handhold. I'm really not up to this, he told himself.
Gillian was at his side instantly, catching him as he fell. But she could hardly hold him up more than he could himself, and they ended up tumbling to the floor together, her trapped under him for a moment. The feel of her body against his would have been something to savor if it hadn't been for the pain.
Harry was there a moment later, trying awkwardly to help separate the two of them. With his help, Zardan rolled aside and collapsed onto the blankets again.
"Idiot," Gillian complained as she pulled herself to her feet. "You didn't have to get up, you know you're too badly hurt."
"I thought you were in danger," Zardan said. That should have been enough to explain everything, but Gillian put her hands on her hips and glared at him. With a sigh, he kept talking. "I didn't save you out on the ice only to let someone here kill you, not when I owe you a life-debt."
"He saved you?" Harry asked excitedly, looking from Zardan to Gillian and back. "You didn't say anything about that! What happened? Who'd you save her from?"
"I didn't say anything because I knew you'd pester me for details," Gillian said, shaking her head and shooting Zardan a glare. His lip twitched as he held back a smile — he was hardly going to apologize for telling the truth. After a moment, Gillian shook her head. "Okay, Harry, I'll tell you all about it. But not now, first we've got to work out what to do with him. Your curiosity can wait."
Ha
rry's face fell for a moment, and Zardan wanted to laugh. Would have done, if he hadn't felt sorry for the kid. He remembered what it was like to be young like that, barely, and he didn't want the boy to think he was making fun of him.
Gillian shot him a look, and he knew he hadn't concealed his amusement from her at least. Her glare turned into a longer look, and then her face reddened delightfully when she realized she was staring.
"We'll have to find you some clothes that fit, too," she muttered, turning away quickly. Zardan had heard that nudity embarrassed humans, but it wasn't something he'd encountered first hand. And the way the female had looked at him made ignoring the feelings rising inside him harder. That had to stop.
At least this is a problem I can do something about, he thought. He had no intention of causing his hosts any more distress than necessary.
His implanted nanotech still functioned, though. Drawing power from it, he called back the clothing he'd worn in Fuller Station before he shifted. A simple tunic and pants formed around his body, molecules taken from the air and reformed until in a few seconds he was dressed again.
The two humans stared, awestruck by that simple technological trick. Zardan couldn't help smiling. Human technology was so primitive in some ways, it was a wonder they'd made it to space at all.
He caught a hint of disappointment in Gillian's expression as well. Time to change the subject back to my leaving, he decided. There are things that neither of us want to discuss, I think.
"I will need some time to recover," Zardan said, bracing himself against the wall and sitting up. It hurt, but it was a lot more dignified than lying back and speaking to the ceiling. "Unless you have some healing nanites on hand, it will be a while before I can leave under my own power. If you let me stay, I will try not to be a burden on your hospitality in the meantime."
"Of course you can stay," Gillian said, sounding unsure of herself despite her firm words. "I'm not going to save you just to kick you out to die in the snow, now am I?"
"Oh boy," Harry said, excitement in his voice. "I've never met a dragon. You can tell me stories about, about space and stuff, and princesses and—"
"That's enough, Harry," Gillian said firmly. "Maybe he will tell you stories but not now, he's got to rest. Come on, let's get out of his hair."
Pulling a reluctant Harry towards the door, she looked back at Zardan. There was an uncertain vulnerability in her eyes as she met his gaze. "I'll be back later, with some food. If you need anything, call on the radio."
With that she was gone, pulling the heavy steel door shut behind her and leaving Zardan alone in the maintenance bay.
Thank the Thousand Suns, Zardan thought as the two humans left. The last thing he wanted to do was dwell on the past and the Empire, the ruins of his life and hopes and dreams. No, the sooner he was recovered and able to leave, the better for everyone.
Especially if Gillian was his mate, he didn't want to drag her down into the darkness with him. She deserved better than that.
5
Gillian
Harry looked at Gillian with the kind of wide grin that always made her nervous. She wasn't sure if it was going to lead to trouble or not, but it was a warning sign anyway. Her brother could get intensely curious about a subject and not let go of it, and if he fixated on this Zardan... well, she didn't know what would happen, but it was bound to be lively. And possibly embarrassing.
"Did he really save your life?" he asked her, practically vibrating with curiosity. "What happened out there?"
"I'm not going to talk about it," she told him, trying to be firm. "Why don't you see if you can get through to Dad? We're going to have to let him know what's going on. And I guess we need to tell someone there's an injured dragon here."
That wasn't the kind of problem she'd ever worried about — the Dragon Empire claimed Mars, but there were only a few hundred dragon shifters on the whole planet. Gillian had never expected to meet one in person. The idea that she might bring home an injured one hadn't even occurred to her.
That makes it sound like he's a bird or something, a pet I found by the road, she thought, shaking her head at the image and trying to laugh. I'm not going to ask Dad if I can keep him. No matter how hot he is.
It was almost disturbingly difficult to ignore that, though. Dragging the huge bulk of the dragon into the farm's maintenance bay had been tricky, but in a way, she preferred him in dragon form to looking at him now. He was, quite simply, the most amazingly attractive man she'd ever seen. Keeping her eyes off him wasn't easy.
He'd slept for two days, and the whole time his body seemed to call out to her. Sleeping only made it worse — Gillian couldn't remember much about her dreams, but she'd woken flustered and frustrated every morning. There was something about Zardan that her subconscious wouldn't let go of.
Now that he was awake, that call was even stronger. His odd violet eyes were so intense and piercing and somehow sad that she wanted to know his story. And his voice! That low rough growl of his sent shivers through her every time he spoke.
Gillian became aware that Harry was staring at her with a little smirk on his face, and her face flushed as she glowered back at him.
"Shut up," she told him, aware that he hadn't said anything. Harry just laughed.
"Okay, I'll see if we can get through to Olympus, but the radio's been fritzing out," he said. "The weather isn't helping things, it's getting bad out there. I'm worried, sis. Is dad going to be able to make it back?"
"Sure he will," Gillian told him firmly, trying to suppress her own doubts. "The storm will pass, and winter's not really here yet. He's got plenty of time."
If the weather doesn't get any worse, that is. If their father got stuck in Olympus Colony over the winter, it would be a long stay that the farm really couldn't afford. But there was nothing for it now, either he'd make it back or not. And there should still be another week or two of good traveling weather before winter set in in earnest.
Perhaps it would have been better to deal with the bank over the radio, but funds were tight. Paying back their loan meant selling the ice they'd harvested, and they'd left it as late as possible so that there'd be plenty to sell. The Ardashev Bank wasn't known for being reasonable about those who owed it money, which made them want to pay back the loan as quickly as possible.
And he could make the trip worthwhile in other ways, picking up parts for the farm's heater units. They weren't in great shape, nothing around the farm was, and if they broke down over the winter they'd risk freezing before anyone could reach them for repairs. Even if someone could get out to the farm, it would cost a small fortune. Having the spare parts on hand to fix the heaters themselves was important.
Only now Dad's sold the ice and vanished, Gillian thought. He hasn't made it to the bank, he hasn't picked up the heater units, and he hasn't let us know where he is.
Gillian could guess where he was, but it wasn't much comfort. They'd just have to hope he didn't spend too much of the money drinking and gambling, she supposed.
If he did... Gillian didn't want to think about that. If they lost the farm because Dad drank the loan money, they had nowhere else to go.
"You go check on Dad, and I'll do a check on the robots," she said aloud. "Need to find out why Number Five wandered off like that, and if any of the others are going to do the same."
Harry looked at her dubiously. "Maybe we should just leave them powered down? I mean, we're not going to get much more done anyway."
"We'll need all the ice we can get," Gillian countered. "I'm not just shutting the farm down because we had a little trouble. There's still a lot of drinkable water around here just waiting to be dug up, and we want as much of that ready to sell as we can get, come spring."
Harry shook his head but didn't argue the point, and Gillian was quietly grateful. Her brother did have a point — if one of the robots got seriously damaged, the repair costs could ruin the farm. Living so close to the edge was getting stressful.
Which
means taking care of the resources that we do have, she thought. So I'll have to work out what went wrong with old Number Five and figure out how we can keep the robots from blundering into a ravine.
That had the advantage of being work she could do without being around Zardan. Keeping away from the confusing feelings he sent through her sounded like a good plan, and the problem here had to be software. She could check that from the farm's offices and stay away from her damnably attractive patient.
Settling down to work amongst the stacks of poorly-filed documents, she downloaded Number Five's logs and started to go through them. It wasn't an easy task, and mapping the poor robot's movements onto a map seemed impossible. The readings made no sense at all.
Something must have seriously messed with the robot's navigation sensors, but even so she couldn't work out the path it had taken to get to where she found it. There were gaps and errors everywhere in the logs. Gillian tried to map it out, only to get stuck every time.
With a growl of frustration, she threw her pen at the dartboard on the office's far wall. Once there'd been darts to go along with it, but they were long gone. The pen made a poor substitute, bouncing off and skittering along the floor, but at least it let her vent her frustration. With a sigh, Gillian pulled a new pen from the box beside her, flipping it from hand to hand as she thought.
Why the hell did you go so far? She glared at scribbled map of the robot's path. What were you looking for? You were supposed to be mining out the clean ice around here, not scouting the edge of the territory.
Her best guess was that it started when the robot's connection to the base computer had been interrupted, and its mapping software got confused. Which shouldn't happen, not when it got its navigation updates from satellites, but then there was the weird static that had messed up her radio too. Perhaps that was why it had started to wander south, looking for a stronger navigation signal?
