As quickly as it happened, everything was still and silent. I was unable to make a sound. I tried to cling to consciousness. My head was lost in a fog. I blinked my eyes open and could see the blurry image of William. He was slumped against the steering wheel, unmoving, with blood on his face. I tried to reach for him, but everything went dim as pain shot through my body; then I knew no more as the darkness descended.
I had no idea how long I was unconscious. It may have been minutes or days. During that time, I dreamed of William. I saw myself back in that grassy patch surrounded by more people I didn’t know paying their last respects to Judy.
Fear washed over me at the thought of finally losing William; the only person I had left.
One minute, I’d been ready to throw in the towel on our relationship. Then, all I wanted was to hear was William’s voice telling me everything was going to be okay. I didn’t care about anything else.
Chapter Fourteen
The steady beeping of the heart monitor machine laced its way through my dreams. It replaced the sound of my text messages. I smiled reading all of the private notes from William.
It beeped and I was back at my aunt’s house, hitting snooze on the alarm clock, begging for a few more minutes of sleep.
It beeped and I was in a checkout line at the grocery store. That was probably the least exciting dream I had. Light washed over my face, and that last terrifying second before we crashed played over in my mind. William begging me to stay with him and me telling him I hated him. I felt sick.
Really felt sick. My stomach turned and I slowly blinked my eyes open. My head was throbbing with pain and the slightest amount of illumination magnified it.
“Welcome back,” a cheery voice called out. A woman who looked to be in her early forties and wearing cartoon emblazoned scrubs was standing over me, smiling.
“So bright,” I whispered, my voice hoarse.
“Sorry about that. How you feeling?” she asked as I continued to blink rapidly.
“William?” I asked, not wanting to waste my voice talking about myself.
“The man you were brought in with? I will have the doctor speak with you about his condition.” She leaned in closer to me, brushing my hair from my forehead. Her smile brightened and I nodded, squeezing my eyes closed.
The doctor entered the room right as if on cue. He and the nurse spoke quietly at the foot of my bed.
The doctor moved closer to the head of my bed and was writing something down on a clipboard over me. “How are you feeling Ms. Townsend?”
“My head hurts and I could use a drink.”
He continued to write something then paused to speak. “We’ll get you some water.” He nodded to the nurse and I watched her move to the bedside, and then turned my head slowly back to the doctor.
“William?” I asked urgently.
“We’ll know more after some tests. We’ll let you know when we do. Right now, he’s still unconscious.”
“Can you tell me the last thing you remember?” He looked at me expectantly.
“The car accident.” My mind flashed to the image of William lying motionless next to me.
“Can you tell me your full name?”
“Emma May Townsend.”
“Very good Ms. Townsend. Now, is there someone we can call for you?”
“No.” I swallowed hard wanting to fight back my despair. He was all I had now—and I doubted I had him anymore.
I sucked in a deep breath. He was really hurt, and I wasn’t there with him. I pushed to sit myself up, but I was dizzy and weak. I reached for the IV in my hand to pull it out. William would need me! I had to go to him.
“Not so fast.” The doctor held out his hand to keep me in bed. “Your vitals are stable, but I want to keep you here a little longer just to make sure you are alright. After a CAT scan, we should be able to rule out any serious injury to you. I promise, you can see him then.”
I nodded, laying my head back on the pillow. I was too dizzy to stand up anyway.
“How long was I out?” I was afraid to hear the answer.
The doctor checked the watch on his wrist. “Long enough that we’re going to be observing you for a bit,” the doctor said.
It didn’t sound that bad and I wanted to protest. I needed to see William to make sure he was okay.
“Lay back and relax. The test shouldn’t take long.” Two others in scrubs appeared at my side. I hadn’t noticed them before. They locked the railings on my bed and began to push me out of the room.
“I’m fine really. I don’t need this.” One of the women looked down at me and smiled but no one said anything to me. They were too busy talking amongst themselves using medical jargon that I couldn’t begin to understand. I was scared, and I wanted William by my side.
I closed my eyes and forced myself not to cry. I felt like I was dying. Not because of my injuries, but because my heart had been shattered. I had no one else to turn to. I needed to know he was all right.
The test went by in a blur. Everything was normal. I didn’t care either way. If William was not okay, I didn’t want to live. I was torn between my love and hate for him. I was a mess.
Chapter Fifteen
It seemed like an eternity before I was finally released from the ER. I barely registered the doctor’s comments on signs of things to watch for. I just wanted to get to William.
I grabbed my clothing and changed quickly in the tiny restroom. I dared to take a glance at myself in the mirror. I was a mess. My hair was knotted and wild. I ran my hands through my hair and winced as my fingers rubbed over the large lump that had formed after my head bounced off the passenger window. I squeezed my eyes closed and waited a moment for the pain to pass. When it was finally manageable, I turned on the sink and splashed some cold water on my face.
I was suddenly terrified to see William. I didn’t know if I could handle seeing him so helpless and broken. The doctor hadn’t told me much at all about William yet. He was lucky to be alive, considering he hadn’t been wearing his seatbelt at the time. I cringed as the thought of how bad it could have been crossed my mind.
I took a deep breath and forced myself to be strong.
I made my way out into the hallway, glancing in both directions. I spotted a nurses’ station down the hall to the right. I made my way toward it, trying not to let my mind run wild with William.
“Excuse me.” My voice was shaky and I swallowed hard trying to calm my nerves.
“Yes, ma’am?” The nurse behind the counter looked like she was on the bad end of a long shift.
“I’m looking for William Honor? He was brought in with me.” She eyed me for a moment before registering whom I was talking about.
“Yes. He’s in 13. Down the hall to the left.” She flashed me a quick polite smile and her attention went back to the paperwork she had been filling out. I smiled and turned to find his room. My heart was beating out of my chest and I felt like I was on the verge of a panic attack.
I stood outside of room 13 and took a deep breath. I pushed the door open slowly and slipped inside. The familiar beeping of a heart monitor was in the background. The moment I saw him, my heart sank. He lay in the hospital bed covered in a thin white blanket. I slowly stepped towards his motionless body.
“William?”
He didn’t respond and I felt tears threatening to fall. I stepped closer and reached out to touch his hand. All of the emotions of the day came rushing back to me all at once. My aunt’s funeral, the mysterious woman, and the accident. My chest ached as I recalled the horrible fight we had just before the crash.
My head began to throb in time with my frantic breathing. I deserved it. I told the man I loved that I hated him and now he lay unconscious. I felt like a monster. I sagged into the chair placed next to the bed for visitors. I suddenly wondered if there had been any other visitors before me. What if that woman showed up here?
Tears pricked my eyes and I used my free hand to dash them away. The lump in my throat
was growing and I swallowed hard as I thought about how fucked up my world had become.
I was angry and said things I didn’t mean to William, but I was afraid of what other secrets I might uncover. I shook the thought from my head. I had plenty of time to figure out what I would do about our relationship after he woke up. Right now, I just wanted to see his beautiful blue eyes.
He looked peaceful and as if today’s events were not weighing heavy on his mind. I was thankful for that. His physical pain would be enough. He didn’t need the mental torment on top of it. I squeezed his hand and leaned closer to him.
“I love you, William,” I whispered. I had hoped that the words would bring some sort of response from him but he lay perfectly still. Not even a flicker of emotion played on his face. I sighed and lay back in the chair, closing my eyes. How did we come to this point? I was beginning to feel like I was destined to be alone.
I wasn’t a religious person. My parents were Christian but we never went to church on Sundays. Part of me wished they had just so I would have someone to turn to in a time like this. I pushed the thought out of my head. If there was a God, he was the one making me suffer.
My mother was a good person. She worked hard and did what she thought was right. That didn’t stop my family from being erased from my life by a drunk driver. I shivered at the thought. I wouldn’t even allow myself to think of the fact that the drunk driver was my own father.
I could feel the rage bubbling inside of me again. He was a hardworking man, always doing everything he could to make ends meet. His life was stressful and he relieved that stress by unwinding with a bottle of Jack. I didn’t blame him. No matter how hard he tried, something always went wrong. My mother didn’t understand. She would fight with him about never being around. The fights would escalate out of control at times. She should have listened to him when he told her to stop. She never listened to him. He was good man, deep down. He treated me like a princess, never mean or cold like he was to my mother. It was because I listened to him. She pushed him over the edge. After they would fight, he would leave for hours at a time. If she would have just listened, he would have been around more.
The night of the accident, they had argued for about an hour. I remember sitting on the couch and flipping through the channels on the television, doing my best to block them out. My father grabbed his keys to leave again, as he always did. Taking a swig from his nearly empty bottle of Jack, he pushed past my mother and made his way to the car. My mother ran after him and jumped in the passenger side. She was determined to force him to spend time with her. That was the last time I saw them alive.
I wanted to escape, run away from everything. That is what I did after my parents passed away and look what it got me. Not that I had a choice. I was forced to live with my aunt even though it was obvious I could have done a better job on my own.
Chapter Sixteen
The door to William’s room squeaked open and I quickly wiped away my tears. A doctor stepped in, glancing over a clipboard in his hands. His eyes caught mine and he gave me a sympathetic smile.
“I’m Doctor Johnson. You’re his next of kin?”
I thought quickly. “I’m his fiancé,” I said.
“We need to take William here for some tests. His first scans show some swelling and a subdural hematoma. He also has some cracked ribs and mild abrasions. We need to repeat the CAT scan to see about his head injury,” he explained. “After that, we’ll get him up and into a room of his own.”
I nodded and tried to smile politely at him, swiping a tear from my cheek. I glanced over at William before forcing myself to release his hand.
A nurse and orderly were soon at the doctor’s side and they began pushing William’s bed from the room. I stood, not sure if my heart could take the separation, but my feet wouldn’t allow me to follow. Not that I would have been allowed to go with him.
I glanced around the room. There was another bed on the far side. I made my way to it and climbed in. I need to rest my eyes. Really, I needed to break down while I had a moment alone. I snuggled my face into the pillow and began to sob.
I had no idea where I should go with my life now. The thought of going back to my aunt’s house made me sick. I didn’t know if William was going to be okay and if he would even want me around. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to be around. Everything was just… wrong now. The few friends I had were off on vacation celebrating their new lives, and I lay crying, alone. I sobbed harder, burying my face in the stark white pillow.
After a while, I had run out of tears to cry. I was drained and didn’t want to think about the day’s events. I drifted off, burying my overwhelming sadness in sleep.
When I awoke, William’s bed was back beside mine. I jumped up and rushed to his side. He was still sleeping peacefully. I ran my hand over a bandage near his temple. The tears began to prick my eyes again and I shook my head, forcing myself to be strong.
A nurse entered the room and tilted her head towards me. She was carrying a tray of food. My stomach growled at the smell of it.
“I thought you might be hungry.” She smiled and sat the tray on the cart next to me.
I gave her a small smile in return. “Thank you.”
She nodded and walked towards the machines to check William’s vitals.
“Is he… okay?” I was terrified to hear the answer.
“His tests look good.” She paused. “Are you related to Mr. Honor?”
I swallowed hard, hoping she wasn’t about to kick me out of his room.
“He is my fiancé,” I said again, since this was a different nurse. I pulled my hands down to my lap when she tried to check my hand for a ring. “We just got engaged.” I smiled weakly. “He doesn’t have anyone one else here,” I added hoping that would convince her. She nodded.
“The doctor can explain his injuries; he’ll be in to see you in a bit, and we’ll be moving Mr. Honor upstairs to a room.”
I nodded and wiped at my eyes. All of this was too much to absorb.
“You should eat something,” she said quietly and turned to leave the room.
I lifted the lid off the plate of food. It was mashed potatoes and some sort of turkey gravy mixture. I was starving. I began to slowly eat as something began to vibrate on the far side of his bed. Curious, I began to search for the noise. I opened the closet door and dug through a small bag in the bottom.
Inside was William’s clothing, his wallet and cell phone. The phone continued to buzz and the screen flashed. The caller I.D. said ‘A’. I held it to my chest for a moment, deciding whether or not to answer. Before I could make up my mind, it stopped. I let out the breath I had been holding.
Suddenly, it chirped with a new voicemail, causing me to jump in shock. I bit my lip as I wiped at the screen. I looked back at William and hit the button to listen.
I placed my finger over my open ear to block out the sound of the beeping. I stared at William’s stilled body as the message began to play.
“William, it’s me,” A silky voice purred from the other end of the line. My heart leapt into my throat. Who was this woman? “I’m sorry about earlier. I had no idea you would be there… with her.” My blood was boiling. It was Allison from the funeral. I wanted to jump through the phone and strangle her. “Anyway, I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I’d like it if you stopped by the club. Maybe I could let you take out some of your anger on me?” She laughed quietly and I squeezed my eyes closed. It cut through me like a knife.
The message ended and I blinked several times, pushing the tears back once again. I looked over at William, the fire inside me reignited. I wanted to scream at him, but he lay perfectly still.
I glanced down at the phone, pondering whether or not I should throw it against the wall.
It seemed like an eternity before the doctor came back into the room. I looked at him expectantly, waiting to see why William hadn’t woken up.
“Mr. Honor suffered a severe concussion. Right now, he is in a medically
induced coma so the swelling in his brain can reduce. He has a subdural hemotoma. Basically, a bleeding bruise in his skull. We have given him a drug called Mannitol for the intracranial pressure. His CAT scan and MRI results look promising, but for now, we just need to keep an eye on him. He’ll be unconscious until the swelling goes down. At best, he’ll be here at least a week. Does he have any family?”
I nodded. “I’ll contact them,” I said quietly.
The doctor nodded after a final check on William, and left the room, leaving me alone with him.
Should I call his parents? I knew he was not on good terms with his father, but his mother cared deeply about him. That much was obvious. I bit my lip as I glanced back to William.
He may hate me to wake and find his father here, if he even came, but it would pale in comparison to the anger I felt right now. There was still no guarantee that he would even wake. I pushed the thought from my mind.
I had to call them. My stomach was in knots. I began to search William’s contact list. It strangely had mostly just letters of the alphabet. I continued to scroll and found a contact labeled ‘mine’. I clicked it and my number appeared. I smiled, breathing a sigh of relief that it wasn’t someone else. I scrolled further and found ‘mother’. I took a few calming breaths before clicking the call button.
It rang several times before it clicked and a woman’s voice filled my ears.
“Hello, sweet boy.” It was his mother. I swallowed hard.
“This is Emma.” She was silent for a moment.
“How are you dear? Is everything okay?” Her voice grew concerned with each word.
“There was an accident.”
I explained everything to Mrs. Honor, leaving out the other woman at my aunt’s funeral and the big fight we had had just before the crash. She assured me she would be on the next flight out. His father, however, may not be able to make it.
I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying anything about him. My nerves suddenly took over as I thought of being face to face with his parents again. Without him, it was libel to get very hard to deal with. His mother was kind and I knew she wouldn’t be a problem.
Honor & Obey (Honor Series) Page 6
