by Hayley Oakes
He came.
No hesitation, no question, no excuses, no argument, no mind games. He came.
He was her Daddy, he was her other constant, the man who would never let her down and who would charge into the school gates if she was scared, worried, struggling. He came for her without me even having to ask.
I didn’t feel alone.
His parents stayed whilst we tried to feed Ivy but she didn’t manage many mouthfuls, then she was tired. We dosed her up with Calpol, gave her the antibiotics and then his parents left so we could take her to bed.
If they thought it was strange that I was at Matt’s, they never said. In fact his mother was overly nice towards me which made me wonder how much they knew about recent events.
I cuddled Ivy on the sofa as Matt showed them out, she drank her milk as we sat watching Cbeebies. He sat down next to me on the sofa and sighed with exhaustion, “thank God they’re gone.” I turned and gave him a quick smile.
“You’re so lucky they care and come here at a moment’s notice,” I added and his face turned serious as he took a deep inhale holding my stare.
He nodded, “you’re right.”
I brushed it off with another smile and turned back to the TV, “I’ll make us some dinner,” he added.
“Okay,” he stood to go back to the kitchen and I nursed Ivy, her temperature was much reduced but she was still so clingy and tired. After ten minutes she fell asleep in my arms so I stood and walked though to the kitchen, “I’m going to put her to bed.” I whispered.
He turned from the oven and smiled at us both, walking over to plant a kiss on her head, “night, Ivy.”
I walked her upstairs, placed her gently in her cot and watched for a second as I stroked her head. I was so glad she was alright but my heart was still aching from the worry of the few days in hospital. It was a memory now but my body felt on high alert from the fear and the uncertainty. Now she was on the road to recovery and sleeping peacefully it was as if I could finally break down and so I did. The tears started to fall and my mind started to wander when I thought of what could have happened and how badly things could have turned out. I was so lucky.
I wiped the tears and covered my mouth so my crying wouldn’t wake her.
I stepped back from the cot and when I turned to face the door, Matt was there.
“I heard you crying on the monitor,” he told me with sympathy written all over his beautiful face.
I wiped the tears, “I’m being silly.” I whispered.
He stepped tentatively into the room and I stopped as he approached, he put his hand out first and ran it up and down my arm, rubbing me gently. The he took another step and closed the gap between us, I looked up at him and gave him a tearful smile. He placed his arms around me and drew me into his warmth. I laid my head on his chest and he rubbed a hand gently over my head. I closed my eyes and inhaled his sweet, manly scent. I‘d missed him. I started to cry again, quietly at first but my body shook with the emotion and he just held me to him without questioning why or telling me I was overreacting.
We stood that way for a few minutes before I stepped back, “I know she’s fine but I was so scared,” I uttered.
“I was too,” he gave me a tight smile and swallowed hard watching me intently as I spoke.
“If anything ever happens to her ....” I gasped for breath.
“It won’t,” he reached out and touched my face gently, “she’s going to be fine, she’s fine.”
“I know but ...” my voice croaked, “I don’t have anyone else.” I looked down at my feet and felt the tip of his index finger under my chin, pulling it upwards slowly.
“You have me,” he said solemnly. “You’ll always have me.”
“Thank you,” I said through tears, trying to wipe them away as quickly as they fell.
“Come on,” he tugged me out of the room. He placed his hands on my shoulders and walked me forward, “take a bath, dinner will be twenty minutes or so, I’m making pasta.”
“Okay,” I got to the bathroom door and turned to face him. “I think I’ve decided I can do friends,” I said with a determined nod.
He gave me a slight smile, “sounds good for now,” he narrowed his eyes and they danced with mirth.
I relaxed in the bath, it felt amazing to be warm and clean again. I changed and headed downstairs just as he was plating up tomato pasta and he had poured us both a glass of chilled white wine.
I took a seat and he grinned at me. “You look better.”
“I feel it,” I laughed.
We ate, we chatted, he filled me in on work gossip and I told him about the next competition and my girls. It was like seeing an old friend I hadn’t seen for weeks and I suppose that was what we had become. I didn’t mention that he’d said he loved me and he didn’t mention that he wanted more than what we were having.
Of course he didn’t love me, he missed me and that was a huge difference.
“Ivy’s so lucky to have you,” I said to him as we cleared away the plates, him washing and me drying. “You came in a flash the other night and not all Dads would do that.”
He turned to face me, “she’s lucky to have you too.”
“I suppose,” I stood on my tiptoes to put one of the plates in the cupboard and he took it off me to put up there.
“I came for you too, I’d never let you go through anything like that alone,” he was standing inches from me and I could feel his breath on my face, almost taste him. My heart stuttered at his proximity and his words warmed the places in my body that I wished would remain numb.
I swallowed hard and looked up to him, “I appreciate that,” I stuttered out, “but we tried and ....”
“I didn’t ever say we were over,” he furrowed his brow and looked at me with sheer determination. “I wanted to make sure what we had was more than just being parents to Ivy.”
I looked down away from him, “let’s just forget about that, we’re just getting back to normal.”
“Okay,” I looked up to see him nod, “I won’t push but I’m sorry about how I handled things and I’m sorry that you got hurt but I can’t change that, I can promise that I know now it’s you I want.”
I glanced to his lips and pulled my bottom lip into my mouth. “I don’t think you really know what you want and I need to protect my heart because I have Ivy and my job and I can’t be a mess,” I breathed.
“Penny,” he stepped forward and his hands gently massaged my shoulders, “I want us, I want our family and I want to prove to you that we can make this work.”
My heart clenched at his words and my stomach swam with nerves, I closed my eyes, “I cried for you Matt, I got over this and I can’t risk breaking my heart all over again.”
He bent to kiss my head. “Can we just see how it goes?” he uttered.
“How?” I opened my eyes and tears welled in them.
“Date?” he shrugged, “we just jumped to being together all the time before and so let’s build up to it this time.”
“I’m not sure I even trust you,” I admitted, my voice breaking. “I have a strict never screw me over twice rule.”
He pulled me to him, his head rested on mine and he took a deep breath. “I didn’t screw you over, I never ever treated you like I didn’t care.”
“You treated me like damaged goods,” I tried to hold back the tears and he held me tighter.
“Penny,” he soothed, “I should have said I want to be sure that what we have is for keeps, that I don’t want to hurt you and so I need some time, I should never have made it about you, it was never about you.”
“I’m tired,” I said, just talking about my emotions exhausted me as it had happened so rarely in my life, unless some social worker was asking me how I felt about yet another move.
“Yeah? Wanna watch TV together in bed?”
I rolled my eyes, “I thought you were in the other bedroom?”
He grinned, “I am but we can lie together can’t we?”
Matt didn’t leave me that night, he hugged me on top of the covers and then underneath. He held me all night, it felt amazing to be in his arms again and I worried that he thought we would carry on as we did before. My body wanted that so much and my heart was also in favour but my head told me to be wary. My head had always known we weren’t compatible and that I could never replace his wife but he was just too damned cute in every way to resist.
I believed that he’d had second thoughts but I was still very dubious about whether it was really me he wanted or the happy, cosy life that we shared with Ivy.
I hoped that somehow I’d figure out whether I could trust the intense attraction I had to him and the lovely words that came out of his mouth.
I wanted to, I wished I could but it seemed Matt Larson was just too good to be true.
Chapter 39 - Matthew
EVER SINCE I WAS a little kid I had an issue with no.
I was cute, my mum couldn’t resist me and I had two bratty, little sisters who made me look like every mother’s dream. My stupid sisters fought all the time and stole each other’s shit constantly and I just looked on laughing my cock off. Not much got me riled up, not much made me furious and where other kids at school were screaming at their parents I was having beers with my dad in the garden. Everyone loved it round at my house and I think, like my dad, I learnt that being a happy man meant keeping your head down and staying out of the way. We got fed, we got cleaned up after and we were happy.
I never strived for any certain girls, they just came to me and I liked that. In high school there were plenty of girls and my first relationship was Sadie Tucker. It was awesome it was crazy and in sixth form my life seemed to be pure unadulterated fun. University was more of the same, I knew I was good looking and chicks dug the unmade bed appearance I had going for me. I always got the girls I wanted and if I didn’t, I found someone else.
I didn’t hear ‘no’ often.
Penny was blocking me. I understood why, I’d inadvertently ruined everything. Did she realise I was biding my time waiting for her to say yes? I saw the way she still looked at me and I saw the effect I still had on her. The way she slanted her head, licked her lips and looked at me made my dick twitch.
I needed her to know that I was willing to wait, that I was willing to bide my time so I didn’t have to hear ‘no’ anymore. The night she and Ivy stayed with me I hoped I was halfway there.
She had walked away from me before and yet when I asked them to stay with me, she didn’t take much persuading. Maybe because she was exhausted, maybe because she didn’t want to be alone or maybe because she knew I would look after her. I wanted to always look after her.
I woke up with her lying across my chest, my cock stirring at just her scent and her arm draped over me and leg bent over my torso. I’d missed that. I placed my arm tightly around her and kissed her head. Penny was such an enigma, so strong and determined yet she had almost an innocent quality like she needed someone to look out for her, she deserved that. She started to mumble awake as my arm held her in place and I ran my fingers up and down her arm softly.
“Hmmm” she blinked her eyes open and smiled at me sheepishly, “morning,” she croaked.
“Morning,” I smiled and let go of her, turning onto my side to face her. She watched me, wondering what I’d do next. I wanted to kiss her, wanted to run my hands all over her body and make her feel good but I had to hold back. I needed to take my time. “I sleep better with you,” I told her.
“Rubbish,” she smirked. “I lie all over you, I’m surprised you sleep at all.”
“I like it,” I bent to kiss her nose and she gave me a sad smile, a smile that said she missed me too.
“We better see how Ivy is, I should really get to work today,” she sighed.
“Penny ...” I started and she waited for me to say something, anything and I had no idea what to say, how I could make this right. “What would it take to get you to forgive me? How can I show you that we should be together?” I asked my face solemn.
She closed her eyes briefly and then she glanced to my lips, I knew she was warring with what her body clearly desired and yet her head told her was a good idea, “I wish I could tell you to leave me alone and that nothing would work but I’m not sure I’m strong enough” she admitted quietly.
I inched forward, not touching her with my hands but making sure our hips were lined up and our chests almost pressed together, “I don’t expect things instantly back to the way they were but can we ... try.” I asked.
She smiled and nodded, “my dads will kill me,” she groaned.
I moved my hand to graze her hip and pulled her closer to me, then I dipped and placed my forehead on hers. “This is what I want, us and Ivy, I promise I won’t let you down again and I’ll make you trust me.”
Her body relaxed as I wrapped myself more around her and bent to touch her lips gently with mine. She let out a little moan as I peppered her with soft kisses and I moved my hand to cover her taut bottom as my kiss deepened. “Matt,” she said and it urged me on, “I’ve missed this,” she said breathlessly as my tongue found hers. I was rock hard and desperate to get her naked but conscious of the small steps we needed to take. She placed her hands on my upper arms and squeezed my ridges of muscle as I rolled on top of her on the bed. I settled between her legs and she could feel my hardness through her flimsy pyjamas, rubbing her sex against me as I groaned with need.
She moved a hand down my back and grabbed my bum, spurring me on, “Mama!” Ivy cut through our hot and heavy session, “mama!” followed by a deep, throaty cry.
“Oh shit,” Penny looked at me with a pursed lipped smile and I rolled off her, sighing hard and willing my dick to behave. Poor guy was about ready to explode.
She hopped out of the bed and kissed my head, laughing and leaving to go and get Ivy.
Penny wanted to go to work, she didn’t want to let her girls down. Ivy still wasn’t a hundred percent and so my mum came over to my house to watch her, snuggling Ivy on the sofa still in her pyjamas. I was going to take Penny to work. We set off before nine so we could get to her first class, she needed to get back to her flat, change and then I’d leave her at the dance school and pick her up later.
I brushed the back of her hand with mine as I drove and she rubbed the top of my hand gently with a finger as she looked out of the window, “grab stuff for tonight too, you can stay with me.”
“It’s your night to have Ivy, you have her and then you don’t have to come out and get me again,” she said, turning to me.
“I want you both,” I told her with a serious glare and she softened her face with a smile.
“I thought we were taking it slow,” she rolled her eyes.
“I won’t touch you,” I smirked.
“Yeah, heard that before,” she laughed and turned away from me again.
“I just don’t know how we do this,” I sighed, running my hand through my hair. “I just want you back with me, like we were but now I fucked stuff up and I have no idea how to make it right. Ben says go big and I have no idea what that is, Dad says persevere and I’m not sure I’m that patient ... I’m no good at not getting what I want,” I admitted.
“You seem pretty good at getting what you want, Matt,” she looked at me and I nodded. “Every time you do something wonderful it reminds me why I liked you so much but every time I think about my flat and you telling me how damaged I am, it hurts my heart.”
I reached over and took her hand and held it gently, “how about I just keep being wonderful until we forget about that?” I grinned straight ahead as I drove through traffic.
“That’ll work,” she laughed.
We reached her flat, I parked up and we both walked up the stairs, me behind her, checking out her arse as usual. At the front door she pushed inside and I went to the kitchen to make a quick drink whilst she got ready. She stripped off quickly and darted from the bedroom into the bathroom, she had a towel round her but her peachy skin
was more visible than not and it made me ache to see more. I wandered casually to the bathroom door, she stood over the sink, brushing her teeth naked.
I walked slowly up behind her and her eyes caught mine in the bathroom mirror. I stood as she continued to brush her teeth, her pale, blue eyes not leaving mine. She stopped, wiped her mouth with a towel and I stepped forward, my sweat pants and T-shirt flush to her naked back. She didn’t move, I moved slowly and deliberately, moving my hands round her front to cup her breasts, the breasts I had missed so much. They were full but not overly so, pert and sexy with pink nipples that begged to be touched.
She gasped as my hands squeezed her gently and my fingers found her nipples, her eyes closed briefly at the sensation and my dick hardened as I watched her pleasure through the mirror. Her plump, pink bottom lip dropped and her golden hair splayed over her shoulders made her look completely fuckable. I pushed into her gently from behind with my raging hard-on and she rubbed backwards into me, goading me. I moved one hand to brush hair off her right shoulder and dipped to kiss her neck, nipping and sucking gently. She opened her eyes and watched me, moaning softly. I took my time to trail my fingers down the front of her body, gently smoothing down her toned, taut stomach over her silky skin and I struggled to hold in a groan as I found her pussy bare for me, she eased her legs open inviting me inside.
“I missed you Pen,” I whispered as I kissed her neck and moved up to her jaw.
“I missed you too,” she uttered, her voice croaked at the omission as if she didn’t want to say it but my fingers caressing her meant she couldn’t hold it in. I teased her sweet spot and found the hot centre that I had dreamed of with a rock hard cock for weeks. “Oh Matt,” she mumbled in pleasure, collapsing a little in my arms but I held her tightly in front of me as I pushed my fingers inside her to find the spot that made her go crazy.
