“Stop, just stop talking for a minute. I love you too. Being without you was hell. I was so angry, I wouldn’t let you explain yourself to me. I didn’t want to hear any of it.”
“You were right to end it. Look what loving me got you; cracked ribs, bruises, and stitches.”
“This wasn’t your fault. The blame lies solely with Tom. He did all of this.”
“I still lied to you.”
“You did. But I can understand why you did it now. I saw it then but I didn’t want to let go of my anger and hurt. Hating you was easier than loving you.”
“So what now? Where does this leave us?”
“I’m yours Chad. If you want me in your life I’m yours.”
“Lay with me?” I scooted myself over a tiny bit and sucked in a breath at the flash of searing pain in my side.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, just lay here with me for a while. I need to feel you against me.”
She pulled back the covers and laid on her side facing me. “Say it again. I need to hear it again.”
“I love you,” I whispered. She ran her fingers across my cheeks and down my lips.
“I love you too baby. I was so scared when you didn’t wake up.”
“I know you were.”
“Could you hear me when I talked to you?”
“Yes, every word.”
“Good. I wanted you to know how much we all wanted you to come back to us.”
“I was trying so hard. It was like being in a maze, I couldn’t tell which way to go.”
“You’re back now, that’s all that matters.”
“I’m back, and I’m never going to let you go.” I pulled her close to me and pressed my lips to hers.
“Um, is this allowed?” She pulled her head back.
“Who the fuck cares? I was just in a coma. If I want to kiss my girl, I’m going to do it.”
“Yes sir.” She giggled and leaned in again.
Becca and Ruth found us huddled together ten minutes later when they came in.
“All good in here?” Becca asked.
“Better than good,” Scarlet answered and wiggled out of my grasp so she could stand up.
“There’s a police officer here who would like to ask you some questions if you’re up for it,” Ruth asked gently.
“Yeah okay.”
“Come on, let’s you and me go and get something to eat.” Becca herded Scarlet toward the door.
“She can't stay?”
“Not for this, no. I’m staying with you though.” Ruth patted my hand reassuringly.
“We’ll be back later.” Scarlet blew me a kiss.
“So how are you really doing?”
“Okay I think. It’s hard to tell. Everything hurts. I still don't really know what happened.”
“You were stabbed six times in the sides and back.”
“Stabbed? Really? Why don’t I remember feeling that?”
“The police officer told me when it happens it just feels like you’re being punched, not like a blade is going in.”
I nodded. “I guess that makes sense.”
A knock preceded the uniformed officer entering the room.
“Mr. Langer? I’m Officer Maddings.” He was tall and broad shouldered, with an all business sort of look to him.
“That’s me.” I tried to sit up a bit but couldn’t. Ruth saw my attempt and pressed the button on the bed to move me into a sitting position. It hurt like hell, but I was happy not to have them stand over me while we spoke.
“Are you up to answering some questions for me?”
“Yeah. I’ll tell you what I can remember.”
“Great. Can you tell me what happened?”
“I was just getting home from work. I thought I saw some movement inside of my apartment but I went in anyway. When I got inside my father was standing with Scarlet, she was bruised and bleeding.” My hands clenched into fists at my side.
“I know this is hard,” Officer Maddings said gently.
“When I walked further inside he grabbed her and pressed a knife to her throat.”
“Did he say what he wanted?”
“Money. I assume to buy meth, it’s what he had been using since he was here. I told him I would go and get some if he would let Scarlet go. He made some threats, pressing the knife into her neck.”
He made some notes in his notebook and motioned for me to continue.
“I convinced him to let me get her cleaned up before I left. The moment she was clear of him I made a break for him.”
“Do you remember being stabbed?”
“No, I remember him punching me in the sides and back a lot while I was on him. I didn't even feel it really until Scarlet got me off of him. That’s all I remember. What happened to him, where is he?”
“Thank you for your statement. Tom Langer is currently being held without bail for the attempted murder of you and the forced abduction of Miss Doyle.”
I sighed in relief. “Thank God. Will there be a trial?”
“I’ll keep you up to date when I find out more. Please take my card, and if you remember anything else don’t hesitate to call.” He handed me the card and shook my hand before leaving.
Ruth was standing off to the side, her lips pressed in a thin line. “I knew what happened, Scarlet told me, but hearing it from you makes it all seem more real. We came so close to losing you.”
“I’m still here Mom.”
She smiled. “I’ve always wanted you to call me that, but I didn’t want you to feel like you had to.”
“You’re more than a mom to me Ruth. You made me into the man I am today. I didn’t need to be across the country to find myself because you found me all those years ago. You’ve always known just who I am.”
“I knew you needed to be here. I’ve known who you are from our first day together. You are a good man, nothing like him.”
“I’m not sure that’s true. I have it in me to be violent.”
“We all do, it’s just if you choose to act on those impulses. You’re so much more than you give yourself credit for.”
They released me from the hospital a few days later, once they were certain I could move around on my own.
Ruth insisted on moving me into a new place, she hated the thought of me living in the apartment where everything happened. Scarlet pulled her truck in front of a big black gate and punched in a few numbers on the keypad.
“What has she done?” I laughed as we continued down the driveway toward the huge house nestled on the sand by the beach.
“She knows how much you love the beach, so she got this place.”
It was very modern, lots of sharp angles and glass. I found that I really did like it a lot. “Please tell me it’s just a rental?”
“What do you think?” She smiled wryly. “Now stop complaining and let’s get you inside. Everyone is waiting.”
“Everyone?”
“Yeah, you didn’t think you’d come home to an empty house did you?” Her eyes twinkled.
“One can hope right?”
I walked to the house at a snail’s pace; my body still hated me. Becca swung the door open when we got close.
“You’re home!”
“Looks that way.”
“Oh shut up and get inside. Just enjoy this beautiful house and everyone who loves you.”
Seth, Levi, and Joseph were leaning against the counter talking when I made my way into the kitchen. My heart felt full. This was my family, these were my brothers. No more fighting it. I had a family who loved me no matter what. I didn’t need the love or approval of the man who supplied the genetic material.
“Hey man, good to see you out of that bed.” Levi squeezed my shoulder.
“It’s good to be out of bed.” I laughed.
“You know, if you wanted us all out for a visit, there were easier ways to do it.” Seth grinned and pulled me into a hug.
“Thanks, I’ll remember that for next time.” I laughed
.
“But seriously, we’re so glad you both are okay,” he said softly.
“You and me both.”
“Have you met with your lawyer yet?” Joseph asked.
“Really? He just got out of the hospital Joe,” Ruth chided as she walked into the kitchen followed by Samuel.
“I just want to make sure he’s well represented mom. I wasn’t pleased with the first guy we hired. I’d represent him myself but this is way outside my scope.”
“It’s okay. He left me a message, and I’m going to call him tomorrow.”
“Greg’s a really good guy and a great lawyer. We went to law school together. I can feel confident that you’re going to be well taken care of.”
“I appreciate it.” I slung my arm around his shoulder. I had gotten really good at controlling the wince associated with any movements I made.
“Come on, go and sit down in the living room,” Samuel commanded.
I followed him into the huge living room where one whole wall was made out of glass and looked out onto the water. I could for sure get used to this.
“How are you doing with all of this?” he asked.
“I’m not sure yet. It’s all been so much. I wanted to believe him.”
“Of course you did. Who wouldn’t want to believe that their dad had gotten better? I don’t blame you for that.”
Sam was always so understanding. Through everything, he was always just there, ready to listen.
“I feel so stupid. Becca saw him for what he was.”
“Don’t do that. Becca wasn’t here every day with him. She didn’t hear everything he told you day in and day out. Or see the changes he wanted you to see. I’m sure if she had been here with you the whole time it would have been a different story. You saw what he wanted you to see. Maybe he really had changed but maybe not. Addiction is a scary thing.”
“I don’t think he changed.” I shook my head. “He just wanted to use me.”
“Don’t hold onto this. Hate and anger will only hurt you.”
“It’s hard to let go. All of this is so fresh.”
“I know it is. Just be careful not to lose yourself to the hate.”
“Thank you.”
“For what?” He smiled.
“For everything. You and Mom have done so much for me. I can never say thank you enough.”
“We’re your family son, there is nothing we wouldn’t do for you.”
Samuel was the dad I had always been looking for in Tom. The kind of dad who loved unconditionally and never made me feel less than who I was.
“I should never have been looking for you in him when you were here for me all along.”
“I don’t begrudge that, you have to know that. I understood it. You have always craved it, the approval and the love. I have always and will continue to freely give both of those things. I knew you would always wonder about him if you didn’t give him a chance.”
“Dad…”
“I’m always going to be here. I’ll never raise my hand to you or withhold my love. You are worth it for me. You and your brothers and sister mean more to me and your mom than anything else. We are blessed beyond all measure.” He pulled me against him and hugged me while I poured out the emotion I hadn’t realized I had been holding in.
“It’s okay,” he whispered.
“I hate feeling weak, and I hate feeling helpless. I will never forget how scared she was when I walked through the door. The sight of her blood covering her mouth, the bruises on her face, the knife pressed into her neck. I’ve never been so terrified Dad.” I couldn’t catch my breath. All of the terror I had been holding inside of me since I woke up was finally coming out.
“Come with me.” He led me up a set of stairs to a bedroom. I was thankful that I didn’t freak out in front of everyone.
“Get it all out son, no shame in it.” He patted my back as we sat together on the edge of the huge bed.
“I love her, Dad.”
“I know you do. What are you going to do about it?”
I looked at him. “Not go ring shopping, that’s for damn sure. I’m too young to get married.”
“Not any younger than Becca and Levi when they got married, but that’s not what I meant.”
“What did you mean?”
“I meant, what does this change for you? Now that you know your feelings, how will this change your relationship and your life?”
“I know what it’s like without her. Before this we were broken up, she had walked away. I can't go back to that.”
“Why were you broken up?”
“Because my judgment was impaired by my desire to have a relationship with Tom. I lied, told half-truths, and omitted information. I would have left me too. I don’t blame her for it.”
“So what are you going to do to make sure it never happens again?”
“Always be honest. I want her to trust me again, even though I’ve done nothing to earn it.”
“She will, I can see how she feels about you.”
“Sometimes the people we love aren’t the best for us.”
“You aren’t Tom. You are good for her, just like she is good for you. You need to start over with her, figure out what you both really want from this.”
He was right, I couldn’t remember a time he gave me bad advice.
“Now let’s go and enjoy your party.” He smiled and followed me out of the room.
“There he is.” Vin pulled me into a hug as soon as I got down the stairs. “Good to see you up and about.”
“It’s nice to be out of bed for a while.”
“Hurry up and get better so I can beat the smile off your face again.” He grinned.
“Yeah, yeah. You’re lucky I’m not in top fighting form right now, you just wait.”
“We missed you man, glad you’re not dead,” Ian chimed in.
“Ian!” Scarlet slapped his arm.
“What? I didn’t say I was glad he got stabbed or anything. I said I was glad he didn’t die.”
Leave it to Ian to break the ice. The tension in the air was officially gone. We spent the rest of the evening talking and laughing. I was so thankful things had gone the way they had.
The next few weeks flew by in a blur of doctor’s appointments and coddling. As much as I adored Ruth, I was ready to be on my own again.
“Are you sure you will be okay?” she asked for the millionth time in the last hour.
“Mom, I promise I’m well looked after.” I gestured to Scarlet.
“Ruth, I’ll take good care of him. You get back to Samuel.”
“If you think you’ll be okay, I’ll go.”
“I’ll be better than okay. I’m almost back to normal now. All of the stitches are out, and I can drive by myself. You don’t need to stay and babysit me anymore.”
“That’s not what I’ve been doing.”
“Isn’t it? Between you and Becca I haven't been alone since I came home from the hospital.”
“We just love you a lot and wanted to be sure you were better before leaving.”
“I’m better, I promise.” I was going to shoot myself if I didn’t get some alone time with Scarlet. I was starting to forget what she looked like naked.
“Okay, okay, I’m going. Promise me you both will come to New York in a few months. I know we had planned on Christmas but this derailed all of that.”
“We promise. Now get out of here.” I laughed.
“Fine, I’m going.” She gave us both hugs.
When I closed the door behind her I breathed a sigh of relief. “Do you hear that?”
“Hear what?”
“Exactly. No one is here but us.”
“Oh really?” She licked her lower lip. “Did you have something you wanted to do now that we are alone?”
“I could think of a few things, but none more pressing than seeing you without clothes on.” I pulled my shirt over my head. Her eyes went to my scarred skin. I didn’t want it to ruin the mood so I went to put i
t back on.
“No, don’t.” She knelt down and kissed each one gently. “They’re part of you now. The part of you that happened because you saved me.”
“I’ll always save you. No matter what happens, I’ll always save you.” I pulled her to her feet and crushed her body against mine so I could kiss her. I was ravenous for her. Like a starving man in front of a buffet. I never knew need like this.
“Slow down, we have all night,” she panted, pulling away slightly.
“Can’t slow down. Need you too much. Bedroom, now. No clothes. I need to see you, all of you.”
She nodded and walked up the stairs in front of me. When we got to my room, she shimmied out of her shorts, standing in only her bra and panties. I was on her before she could take them off.
“Let me. I want to unwrap my present.” I peeled her panties off first, licking my lips in anticipation. Her bra came next, and she finally stood before me totally bare. “Fucking hell Scarlet. You are incredible. I’ve thought about you so much in the last couple of weeks.”
“Stop thinking then. Take what’s yours.”
I didn’t need any more of an invitation. I tossed her on the bed and descended on her. Licking my way up from her ankles. By the time my mouth made its way up to hers she was panting with pleasure.
“God, I missed you,” she moaned as I sank slowly into her.
“I missed you so much.” I groaned and moved faster. “I can’t wait tonight, I need it too much baby. Say you’re close.” I gripped the pillows above her head.
“Almost there,” she panted. “Just a bit more.”
I rolled her to her stomach and grabbed her hips, there was nothing soft or gentle about tonight. It was all about need, both mine and hers.
“Just like that,” she moaned, pushing her face into the pillows.
My fingers dug into her skin, pulling her against my thrusts. I wanted to feel every inch of her.
“Yes, almost baby.” She turned her head back to look at me. The look of pure lust in her eyes pushed me over the edge.
“I’m fucking there baby, come with me.” I groaned and fell forward against her shuddering body.
The Deeper We Get (The Harder I Fall #2) Page 13
