by Stevens, GJ
14
Panic erupted as Cassie disappeared, wrenched into the next hell. Before I could act, the hands were back, finding Alex and pulling her from my view, despite her protests. As she slid between the gap, Alex reached towards Jess still on the floor.
Jumping forward, I peered into the darkness then rushed to Jess, dragging her from her daze, helping her to her feet as she struggled to get purchase. As she rose, I felt hands through the crack, pushing me away. The sun behind me lit up two pale figures, but then they were gone, taking Jess with them.
I thought the door would close and I would have to turn to face the crowd gathering over my shoulder, but the sun glinted low to the horizon and Shadow barked as the pair of large, dirt-covered hands grabbed at my coat, pulling me forward between the doors before the wood slammed closed.
Metal slid across metal as the hands released their grip. The thud of bodies drummed at the wood and I paused, my panic only subsiding when the barrier held firm.
With my vision settling, growing accustomed to the flickering candles dotted around, I turned with my fists balled, searching for Cassie in the faint orange glow.
Figures gathered in a circle, their shadows moving against the wall. To the slow hammering of movement on the other side of the doors, each figure stood still, feet fixed to the floor, as faces I knew and others I didn’t, stared on wide-eyed in silence.
Stalemate.
Again, time felt as if it slowed; only the pounding rhythm of bodies slapping against the door kept me in the moment.
I watched the faces, their forms coming into focus as my fists relaxed. I found Shadow, or he found me with excited breath as he arrived at my side. I saw Jess standing beside me, her expression as unsure as mine. The corner of her mouth rose as she found Alex opposite her.
I glanced over the four strangers; two men and two women, each of their stares uncertain. Then I saw her, Cassie kneeling at the side of the door, peering to the stone floor as she fought to catch her breath.
The strangers stared at the rifle gripped tight to my side. I ran the short few steps to Cassie, pulled her from her knees and cupped her hot cheeks. She shook away my touch as if in pain, but grabbed at my hands to steady herself. She was burning up.
Alex joined at my side, helping take her weight and we turned, fixing our attention back on the eyes gawking in our direction.
To our left, and closest by far, stood a silver-haired man about my height. With aged-weathered skin and wrinkles accentuated by the flickering light, his mouth stretched out a warm smile. With tired, red eyes, he wore a blue overcoat, the type technology teachers wore over a shirt and tie.
Next to him stood a younger woman, my age I guessed. In jeans and a fleece, she held her palm flat to her cheek. Although her eyes were wide, they seemed small as they darted between us and the scuffle beyond the door. She looked to the guy beside her when he turned and ran out of the vestibule, leaving only the echo of feet slapping on metal stairs rising up the tower.
Each pair of eyes roved around the grand space, flitting from one noise to another, imagined or not. No one seemed to know the next move, and we stood in the darkness, drawing in the dry dust and scents of oil, grease and warm candle wax as the clatter from the steps above faded to nothing.
Next to the woman with the hand at her cheek stood another, much older and with a stern expression looking my way. With her face covered in wrinkles and a head full of fine light hair, I could just make out she wore a tweed skirt and white blouse, looking as if she was there for Sunday service.
Beside her stood the other guy; he’d been stroking Shadow’s back before the dog ran to my side and I pinned the soft voice we’d heard on him, even though he’d not said a word since. His age was somewhere between the other two and with a slight frame, he wore large round glasses he kept pushing up his nose.
We each listened, appearing to share a hope the noise beyond the doors would soon fade.
I expected words, but no one spoke. Only the building sound of feet on the steps from above forced any reaction. The women gave a collective gasp as the feet above missed a step, only to land with a clatter on the next.
“Those stairs are a death trap,” the guy with round glasses said, his voice high and head shaking in the dull light. Heads turned to where the steps started when the grey-haired guy reappeared with his deep voice slightly out of breath.
“Too many. Hundreds.”
No one needed to ask what he’d tried to count.
“What about...?” the guy with the round glasses said.
“It’s dead,” the larger guy replied, his forehead damp with perspiration. “Excellent job, son,” he added. Turning to me, he raised his dirty hand, but held himself back from patting me on the shoulder.
I nodded, unsure how to take the praise as the memory of being shut out flooded back.
“Which one of you wouldn’t let us in?” Only just able to keep my voice level, I watched the guy glance at the one with round glasses, but then turned away as if he’d realised what he’d done.
“They’re scared. We’re scared,” he said in a deep voice, his hands opening out towards me as he took a step forward. “You can understand that. Can’t you?”
“Those monsters...” The woman who held her hand to her cheek spoke in a high voice, wrapping her free arm around herself when she couldn’t bear to finish.
I looked past the guy without glasses, scowling as I checked out each of the strangers, tensing my grip on the rifle between my arm and side. No one moved; only the guy with the glasses looked my way with his chin raised in defiance.
I looked to Jess, squeezed Cassie at my side and my anger faded. These people were a sorry sight and didn’t look as if they could take a cold-blooded decision to let us die.
A distant shrill scream cut through the air, breaking through the drum of limbs against the wood.
“But you’re here now,” the grey-haired guy said. “Right?” he added as he took a white handkerchief from his pocket and wiped his brow.
Turning my head, I saw the shadow of another figure at the edge of the room to the left. A woman with long ebony hair and a slim figure stepped into the soft light where she stared from a doorway.
Eventually she pulled matches from her pocket and lit more candles on a table opposite the entrance.
“Sorry,” the grey-haired guy said with a sudden great enthusiasm. “How rude of me. We haven’t introduced ourselves.”
Stepping back, he turned the handkerchief on his hands and began rubbing at the black marks smearing his skin as I connected the smell of grease, sawdust and something else I couldn’t quite put my finger on.
“Paul,” he said, extending his dirty hand in my direction.
About to hold out my free hand, I peered down to the drying blood caking my skin. The same blood which covered the rifle. The blood of so many victims.
Looking back to Paul, I watched him slowly pull away as if embarrassed we couldn’t shake like civilised society required us too.
“Logan,” I said. “This is Cassie,” I added, then looked across her as Alex spoke.
“Alex.” She raised her palm and gave a shallow wave. “And this is Jess,” she said, pointing two fingers in her direction.
I watched Paul linger on each of our faces, nodding with such enthusiasm he reminded me of an excitable dog who just wanted to make his owner happy. His look returned to Cassie, lingering just long enough for me to notice.
I expected him to speak, to voice concern, but he turned away, offering his hand out to my side and the lady with the long dark hair who’d just lit the candle.
“Amanda,” he said. We each exchanged polite nods, our heads settling when she fixed a squint to Cassie.
“Is she okay?” Amanda said. “And it’s Mandy, please.”
Drawing my head up and down in a slow nod, I tightened my grip around Cassie’s shoulders.
“She’s fine,” Jess butted in as she stepped forward.
“Beth a
nd Harry,” Paul added, gesturing to the older woman and then to the guy whose glasses continued to fall down his nose. “And this is Stacey,” he said, turning to the younger woman who seemed as if her palm was glued to her cheek.
Paul peered down to my side. “And who might this be?” he asked in a childish voice.
“Shadow,” I said, keeping my voice flat.
Paul stepped forward, knelt beside Shadow and ruffled the hair around his neck with great enthusiasm.
“What happened to you boy?” he said when his hand traced the wide circle of shaven hair along Shadow’s abdomen.
I didn’t reply. No one did. Instead, we exchanged nods without voice to the occasional rattle of the heavy doors.
Jess’s voice cut through the silence first. “How long have you been here?”
Paul stood, glancing to Beth at his left before turning back to Jess. “A few days.”
“Why weren’t you evacuated?”
“By the time we realised they were evacuating it was too late. They were drawn to church,” he said with a corner-mouth smile, as he pressed his palms together and pushed the edge of his hands to his lips.
“Do you have supplies?” I asked.
“Some. Yes.” I watched his gaze catch on Mandy’s as she stepped closer into the circle. “We got a little of what we need by scavenging the houses.” He nodded towards the door. “There used to be more of us. We had people out there when the bombs came. I don’t think...” His words tailed off, and I heard one of the women sniff. “Do you know what’s going on?”
I looked to Jess, but although she’d seen me, she didn’t look my way, instead speaking to the group. “Do you have a TV?”
They each shook their heads.
“The power’s been out for a few days now. Even if someone could carry a TV over, it’s not worth the risk.”
Cassie sagged at my side, then tensing, she pulled herself upright, but her look remained vacant.
“Is there somewhere Cassie can rest?” I asked, turning to Paul.
“Oh, sorry. Yes. Come in, come in.”
Paul rushed away, beckoning me to the right and through a wide doorway to the main hall of the church.
Glancing to Jess and then to Alex, each nodded a reply, seeming to agree this place would be safe enough, for now at least.
I was the first to follow, supporting Cassie with Alex on the other side as I tried to soften my steps, desperate to keep the echo from resounding across the wide chamber.
The space where the rear rows of pews should have stood in the main hall was empty. The tang of sawn wood and chemicals grew stronger as we crossed the threshold. Shadow followed at my side, but after a few steps he stopped, turned and barked.
I twisted, watching as he pointed his long snout back towards Jess following.
With all eyes turning to the dog, the echo of the bark died. I could almost sense each breath pause in the room, not listening for the call but the surrounding effect.
Paul rushed back, kneeling beside Shadow and ruffling the fur around his neck.
“It’s all right boy, you’re safe in here. No one’s getting in.”
I watched as Shadow kept looking at Jess whilst rolling his head in time with the guy’s enthusiastic rubs.
Turning away, I did my best to ignore the whispers at the back of the room and I tried not to note the fragments of hushed conversation I caught. Instead, I took in the room’s detail.
Wood covered each of the lower level windows, held in place with metal bars, the wide hall lit with candles around the perimeter flickering in the swirling draft. To the side were the leftovers of the task. A pair of tall, dark gas canisters with pipes snaking from the top and two plastic sawhorses standing to their side supporting the remains of a pew, the top scattered with tools.
After a moment, Paul stood and followed my gaze.
“Are you good with your hands?” he said, with a wide, optimistic grin.
I shrugged a reply. “It looks like you’ve got everything under control.”
“I was an engineer, before I found my true calling. It’s good to have a project. I live...” He paused and corrected himself. “I lived over the road and just about got some of my tools,” he said, laughing, but the joy in his voice seemed to slow as he looked to each of us not sharing his enthusiasm.
“Nearly killing himself,” Beth said, stepping beside him.
Paul gave a wry smile before turning to the floor like he’d been a naughty boy.
“Anyway, sorry,” he said, and strode forward to the front of the church as we followed, pausing only when I heard a raised voice from behind us.
“No. I won’t,” she said, the voice rising further.
I turned to see Mandy striding past Jess, stopping an arms' length from me and pointing to Cassie with her face pinched. “I demand you tell us what’s wrong with her. Now.”
15
JESSICA
The dog knew.
He knew the monster I’d become.
I couldn’t stay there long. They should have barred the doors with me outside.
“Follow me,” the man with the oily hands had said, his voice as if already in another room.
I paused, checking for the hunger, pleased when I couldn’t feel the sensation rising from my gut. I felt nothing, no emotion for them or myself.
The dog followed as the guy moved away. I was sure he glanced back, the shine of his eyes glinting in the candlelight telling me he knew. Telling me he was keeping a close eye.
I stayed towards the back of the group, but pleased to get away from the slap of flesh against the door and the low hum vibrating through the wood that I wondered if I was the only one to hear.
As the room opened out into the nave, my anxiety lowered in the glow of candlelight and upturned benches, relaxing more when I smelt the freshly cut wood and the deep, almost fruity scent of ancient timber mixed with the dust and warm candle wax.
Paul made some comment to Logan, but I didn’t catch the words and when he looked to each of us to join in his laughter, I didn’t reply, only nodding to hide my distraction.
I watched as Paul led Logan and Cassie forward, turning as the panicked call came from behind.
“I demand you tell us what’s wrong with her. Now,” Mandy said with her voice on the edge of hysteria.
No one replied. Logan turned away, Paul following as I stayed to the spot, watching them walk away from the woman who looked on in disbelief as they ignored her call.
I held back, looking on at the end of the impressive hall as Paul fashioned a makeshift bed from kneeling cushions, heading back only when they’d laid Cassie down to rest.
“Am I invisible?” Mandy said, shaking her head as she looked between Paul and the others we’d found in this place. “You need to get a backbone, Paul, or are you going to let these people walk all over us?”
He turned, glaring with a withering look, his deep voice booming in the wide space. “These people are our guests. Just wait.”
Mandy muttered to herself as if Paul’s words had taken her by surprise.
No one else spoke as Logan waited, sitting by Cassie’s side, touching her forehead and shaking his head. We waited as if the tension would explode as soon as Cassie settled.
After a minute, maybe a little more, Logan stood, catching those in the room by surprise as he spoke.
“I’m going up the tower. I have to see what’s out there, then I’ll come back and explain everything. I promise.”
He strode out of the grand hall with Paul following. Shadow sat at Cassie’s side and Logan didn’t look back to check, as if he knew the dog would watch over her without instruction. I had to marvel at the trust he’d placed in the dog, enough to leave Cassie in amongst the people he’d only just met.
I didn’t look to see if the dog stared my way.
Striding down between the remaining pews, Logan didn’t speak and Paul held his hands open as he walked behind as if in apology to their slowly shaking heads. I fe
lt a little sorry for Mandy, agreeing that Paul’s obvious need to please people was sooner or later going to get him killed.
I expected the raised voices to start moments later, but instead I heard feet on the metal steps and found Paul with the others in a semi-circle around the entrance to the staircase and the sound of Logan’s feet rising up the tower.
“Is she bitten?” came Mandy’s dry voice again.
They each turned to face me. Mandy gripped a hammer, pointed out by Paul’s widening eyes as he caught the sight in his peripheral vision, double taking to make sure he’d seen right.
16
LOGAN
In darkness and with my feet slipping on the worn steps, the rifle pinned at my side, I rubbed my hands with the rag grabbed from the side cabinet just before I rose up the tower. At least the clatter of the metal shut out the rattle from the big wooden doors.
Sucking air, I jabbed my shin on another riser, but felt thankful as I looked up to see light from above growing more intense as I rose. I pulled back from the thoughts of what I’d see when I summited, instead concentrating my effort on placing my feet.
I heard steps join the chorus from below, their feet adding to the rattle. I had to do this quick. I had to get a look and form my plan. The way that woman looked at Cassie, I had to get back to her side. At least Shadow would bark if I had to race back down.
The smooth stone walls lightened as I climbed, seeing old metal candle holders protruding empty from the wall and a long rope hanging in the central space, running through holes in each wooden floor I passed.
My lungs felt as if I’d been climbing the Empire State, not the four or five storeys I’d already lost track of. The length of my back ached from the fall down the steps into the tunnel.
The dull brass of the great bell came into view, and I readied myself for what I knew would be an abominable sight. It would be much worse than we’d already glimpsed. Steeling myself for the scale, I placed a foot on the wooden floor.
