I wiped them away with my fingers but they kept coming and I was suddenly scared for him, worried about him. Was it too intense? Was that it? Was he just feeling overwhelmed?
“Adrian, what’s wrong? Are you ok? Please talk to me.”
He opened his eyes to meet my worried gaze. He looked so beautiful, his pale eyes awash with his tears but then I saw the pain in his expression and realised, he was not overcome with emotion over what had just transpired; he was overcome with guilt and self-loathing.
“I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have made you do that, I’m sorry.” He whispered.
“No Adrian, please, I wanted you to do that. I wouldn’t have agreed if I didn’t want to do it. Don’t do this, don’t turn everything around. Don’t act like you don’t have the right to happiness or pleasure.” I ran my hand over his face, trying to get him to accept what I was saying to him. “You’re a good man, you aren’t bad or evil or whatever else is going through this handsome head of yours.” I tapped his forehead, smiling at him but he simply stared at me with sad eyes, not responding to what I was saying. “I liked what you just did. I’ve loved it all so far. I love what you do to me. I love that you are so caring and considerate to me.” I sucked in a deep breath, although I had no need to breathe any more anyway, but I needed to do it to build up to what I was going to say to him next. I met his eyes again, my gaze unwavering. “I love you Adrian, I love you.” I whispered.
I wasn’t sure what I’d expected his reaction to be when I declared my love for him. I guess in my mind he’d throw his arms around me and hug me to him as he declared his undying love for me too. What I hadn’t counted on was his eyes widening and alarm spreading across his face.
He lay there for a moment longer just staring at me, horror rapidly filling his eyes. Finally he began to shake his head and I saw his lips move but no sound came out.
“Adrian?” My voice was tremulous, unsure.
“NO!” He sat up suddenly, tossing me off him and leaping off the bed like he was on fire. He spun around to me, his expression wild, almost crazed. “NO Faith…you can’t…for fuck sakes NO!” He raked a hand through his hair. “You don’t love me, you don’t fucking love me. Don’t you dare say that; no one can love me, no one, don’t you get it? I will only destroy you. I’ve already started, can’t you see? You’re so wrong about me, so damn wrong.” He turned away from the bed and began to round up his clothing, hastily pulling them back on.
I sat up watching him, shocked, hurt, devastated by his words. “You’re wrong Adrian, so wrong. I love you, I will always love you.” I cried and felt tears begin to roll down my cheeks.
When he’d finished dressing he walked back to the bed and stared down at me for a few moments, a range of emotions crossing his face. I saw despair, pain, anguish and something else, something I couldn’t identify. “I have to go.” He said softly before turning from me and heading for the door.
“No…Adrian…please don’t leave me. I have no way to get back home. Please don’t do this. I love you.” I cried, scrambling off the bed and wrapping a sheet around my naked body.
I watched Adrian pause at the door, his eyes moving over me one last time before he stepped out the door into the bright sunlight of the new day. “Stop saying that.” He said and I could hear the pain in his tone. He gave me one final look before closing the door, and he was gone.
“No, no, no.” I rushed to it, tugging it open and raced outside just as the Trans Am reversed and shot out of the motel’s car park. I ran towards it, clutching the sheet to my naked body as I watched Adrian drive away. Shocked, devastated by his rejection of me and the way he’d abandoned me, I could do little but stare towards where the Trans Am had gone, hoping he would realise what he’d done and turn back.
Before I could do anything more, pain, stinging, searing pain, pain that felt like my body was on fire spread over me. It was horrible, agonising; I felt like I was about to combust, and when I looked down at my arms that were wrapped around me, holding the sheet to me, I could see my skin was turning bright red and in some places, starting to blister. I bit down to stop myself screaming with pain and hurried back into the room, slamming the door behind me. I threw off the sheet since my skin was smoking lightly and rushed into the bathroom turning on the tap to the shower. Then just wanting relief from the pain and not caring that the water was cold, I stepped under the spray, hearing the hissing sound as the smoke became steam off my blistering skin.
As I stood under the water watching as the burn marks on me began to fade from my accelerated vampire healing, the reality of my situation finally hit me. I was in a motel room, alone with no way of getting home. I had no phone; I couldn’t go out in the sun. I had been rejected by the man I was so convinced was meant to be mine; plus the answer as to whether I would burn in the sun had been answered.
After several minutes under the cool spray, I turned on the hot water and slowly replayed my time in this motel room with Adrian. It had been so perfect, so beautiful to me and I’d stupidly been so sure he was falling for me.
“Well more fool you Faith.” I murmured. “He’s not only rejected you, he’s abandoned you.”
With the warm water cascading down and despair settling over me, I slid down the tiled wall of the shower until I was sitting on the floor. Adrian’s face filled my head, his rejection, his horror and his retreating back as he’d walked out the door, and I flinched against the unwanted images. Painfully, brutally the realisation struck me. He really didn’t want me, and as the agony of that truth spread through me; tears began to fall, rapidly escalating to full blown sobs. I tucked my cheek up against my knees and with my arms wrapped around them, I gave in to the overwhelming, devastation of his rejection and sobbed the loud, ugly sobs of the truly heart broken.
Chapter Eighteen
Adrian
As Adrian accelerated away from the motel, he was surprised to find tears on his cheeks. Damn her, damn everything, damn life. It had been tolerable before, before his secret was revealed. Now everything was fucked, and he had a woman who stupidly imagined she was in love with him. No one was allowed to love him. He was no fucking good. Why the hell couldn’t Faith accept that?
Angry with himself for showing any kind of weakness, he dashed the tears from his cheeks impatiently. Where would he go? He needed to see Katherine, but she would be full of too many questions now her son was no longer in the house. He wasn’t in the mood to deal with her, not now. Maybe he could go and see one of his clients? Who though? Who might be accepting of him turning up on her doorstep?
As he drove, his mind scrolled through the list of ladies who called on him for service and finally settled on Nadine. Nadine was one of his first clients. She had been married and was now divorced, but had no interest in meeting another man, and she would call on him quite frequently to scratch her sexual itch. Sometimes she called him over and paid him just to hang with her if she was feeling lonely. She suffered from bouts of depression from when her son had died at birth. Her devastation had led to the gradual breakdown of the marriage, combined with a man who had treated her poorly and abused her. She lived alone and had been virtually a recluse for years. The strange thing was that sexually, she had always wanted Adrian to dominate her and be the controlling one. Given her past, he would have thought she’d want to be the one on top.
She was his best shot at a place to stay for a little while. He desperately needed to sleep. He was exhausted, and being up in daylight, exposed to the sun was draining to him. Nadine might expect him to service her, but he could make the effort if it meant getting a bed to sleep in.
With the decision made, Adrian headed for Nadine’s place. As he drove, he pulled out his mobile phone. He needed to ring his father and get someone to go and pick up Faith. As upset as he’d been when he left the motel, he couldn’t do that to her; he couldn’t leave her alone. Someone would have to go and get her.
Fabian answered quickly as if waiting on a call from him an
d after reassuring him that he was ok, he told him about Faith and the motel name, so she could be rescued. “Oh and take that thing you tattoo us with father. I confess that she ran from the motel to try and stop me and I saw smoke rise from her skin. She might be a hybrid or half vampire but she burns like a full blood.”
“I will go and get her son, but come home, we have much to discuss once you’ve had some rest. You need to rest. It will drain you too much to be out in the daylight.”
“I can’t I’m sorry, I will come home soon, but not now. Is Lucas ok? Has Francesca done anything to him?” Adrian asked.
Despite everything, the tension, the unrest, Fabian chuckled. “Do not worry about your son. I suspect despite his sheltered lifestyle he can hold his own. He is calm and very quiet compared with your sister’s loud, obnoxious ways. He is good for her although she might take some persuading to come to that realisation herself. I have not personally gone to check up on them, but Damien did report that there has been some quite vigorous and loud fucking being done in Francesca’s room. Don’t worry yourself about your son.” His voice grew serious again. “Please come home son; we need to make arrangements to do something with this woman who is Lucas’s mother. From what Lucas told us, she is unwell, in fact she is terminally ill. She has already lasted longer than expected due to your excellent care of her, but it’s time to do something with her. Lucas needs to stay with us and learn the ways of the vampire. He must learn to hunt, something we neglected to teach you how to do safely my son.”
“I’m sorry father but I can’t come back right now. I need to think and I need to decide what I’m going to do. Just get Faith for me please. I...I just left her there, but she said something that she shouldn’t have, and I had to leave.”
“What did she say that was so upsetting that it drove you to flee from there?” Fabian asked but Adrian refused to answer him.
“I’ll speak later.” He said and hung up the phone, not wishing to endure any more of his father’s questions.
Quickly he called Nadine to be sure she was home, which he figured she would be given she rarely went anywhere. He had to be sure though. He desperately needed somewhere to sleep. He was feeling so drained now, from lack of sleep and exposure to the sun, not to mention he hadn’t fed for a while. Blood exchanges between vampires weren’t enough and Faith had fed from him, which depleted him even more. He had to rest, he had to sleep, and at least with Nadine, he could get some blood from her too.
She was home and sounded concerned that he’d called her and not her calling for him. “I just need to see you Nadine, I need to sleep. Things are fucked up in my life right now. Is it ok for me to just catch a few hours’ sleep? I’ve been up for hours and I’m exhausted.”
She didn’t say anything at first and her silence started to make him nervous. “You’re not in trouble with the law?” She finally asked.
“Fuck no; it’s just my family is driving me crazy and making too many demands of me right now. They’re fighting; it’s tense and intense and I can’t be around them.”
“Then of course darling.” With her accent, she dragged the word out so it sounded more like ‘darleen.’ “Please, come over. You are welcome to get some rest here and perhaps once you are feeling refreshed…?” She fell silent and Adrian knew what that silence meant. She was going to require some special treatment from him after giving him a bed to sleep in. Well, it was his job, he could do that.
He disconnected the call and pushed his car along as fast as he could in the daytime traffic. There was something to be said for being nocturnal, less traffic.
By the time he pulled up in the quiet, semi-rural property of Nadine’s, he was beyond exhausted. His skin felt hot and was stinging from the exposure to the sun through the car’s windows.
Nadine’s home was a large sprawling country styled home set right back off the road. He drove over a cattle grid and down the long gravel driveway past perfect white painted post and rail fencing where Adrian could see several stunning Arabian horses grazing in paddocks.
He pulled up next to the house and climbed from the car, wincing when the blazing sun burned at his skin which was becoming more and more sensitive. He might have the tattoo which stopped him going up in flames, but it wasn’t enough to stop the sun from causing some irritation, and that irritation became more and more extreme the longer he was exposed to it.
He walked with long swift strides to the house, feeling the welcoming relief when he stepped onto the verandah and was finally shaded from the burning sun. Before he could knock at the door, it swung open and Nadine stood there, smiling at him, her dark chocolate brown eyes warm and welcoming.
For a woman staring down the barrel of fifty years of age, she was still very attractive looking. She was tall, slim with that natural grace of a dancer which apparently she’d once been years ago. She wore her long straight hair pulled back from her face in a quite severe bun and her face was lightly made up.
“Come in darling and tell me what is bothering you so much that you felt the need to come and see me?” She took his arm and pulled him into the house. Her eyes widened when she came into contact with him. “Oh my goodness, are you ill? Your skin is burning up. It’s hot, alarmingly hot. That can’t be good Adrian, surely?”
“I’m ok; I just don’t handle the heat very well.” He lied. “The sun got to me. I’ll be fine if I can just get some sleep. I’m so tired Nadine, bone achingly exhausted.”
“Oh my poor darling.” She reached out and caressed his cheek. “I see your fatigue and I see so much pain. Come; let me show you where you can rest. We’ll talk later and take care of business when you’re feeling more energised.” She scraped her long fingernails over his cock but his body didn’t respond in any way. He was simply too tired for anything right now.
The room Nadine led him into wasn’t the bedroom where she normally took him when he was here to serve her. Instead she took him to another slightly smaller room, decorated in cream and a kind of soft baby blue. He watched as she pulled the blinds for him, darkening the room before coming back over to him.
She reached out and unbuttoned his shirt, slipping it off his shoulders and laid it out over the chair by the bed, before unbuckling his leather pants. He didn’t try to stop her, or assist her for that matter, but when she pushed them over his hips, he kicked off his shoes and stepped out of the pants.
He heard Nadine’s sharply indrawn breath, and stood unmoving while she ran her nails down his chest, over the ridges of his stomach before reaching for his cock. When she curled her hand around its sleeping form, he pulled back from her. “No, not now, let me rest, please.”
She gave him a slight nod of her head and turned, walking from the room. The minute she was gone, Adrian half staggered to the bed, pulled back the sheets and collapsed onto it, his eyes closing. Within seconds he succumbed to his overwhelming fatigue and drifted off to sleep.
Faith
When someone knocked at the motel door about an hour after Adrian had left me there alone, I panicked. I was worried that the hotel staff would somehow know I was there alone. Perhaps they’d seen what had happened outside when Adrian had driven off, and were now coming to toss me out of the room. I couldn’t leave this room until the sun went down or I was going to fry. Fabian talked of never revealing what we were to humans as they wouldn’t understand, but if the manager was coming to throw me out, then being on fire was going to be pretty hard to hide.
I crept towards the motel room door silently, before sneaking a quick look through the blinds I’d closed to darken the room. It wasn’t the motel manager, it was Fabian. What was he doing here, and how had he found me?
I opened the door, keeping my body tucked back behind it so the sunlight that instantly streamed through the open doorway didn’t touch my skin, and as soon as he stepped inside, I shut the door again.
“My son called me little one and told me you were here. He asked if someone could pick you up and take you home, so I came mys
elf. I’m hoping you can explain what happened to make him abandon you in this motel as he has. He was not very forthcoming when he rang.” His pale eyes bored into me.
Tears instantly filled my eyes when my thoughts returned to those last few minutes before Adrian had left me. “I…I…I said something to him that upset him and he…he…he left.” My voice was little more than a whisper.
“What did you say, that would make him react the way he did? I need to know. I’m trying to understand my son. I thought I knew him, but I’m beginning to realise after all that has transpired that I don’t know him at all.”
“You were right. You told me or at least implied that he might not really want me, and he doesn’t.” My voice cracked. “He doesn’t want me and…and I don’t think he ever will.”
“Come little one.” He pulled me into his arms, his unique and beautiful scent surrounding me. “I wasn’t trying to hurt you. I was merely pointing out that revealing his secret might not be enough for him to stop what he’s been doing for the past two years, and come to you. You believe he’s destined to be in your life, but Adrian does not have the benefit of visions Faith. He seems so filled with self-loathing and clearly does not feel he is entitled to any form of happiness in his life. I hate seeing my son reduced to such misery and so determined to suffer as much as possible. I honestly do not know how any of us are going to get past those huge walls he’s built up around himself.”
Something about his words and the thoughts of Adrian so broken, so sad and filled with hate for himself tore at me, and I began to cry again, quickly soaking the front of Fabian’s shirt. “He’s not bad, he deserves to be happy and I wish…I wish it was with me…but…but he…he doesn’t want me.” My words were muffled against Fabian’s chest as I sobbed. “You want to know why he ran away. I…I…I told him…oh god. I told him I loved him.” As soon as the words left my lips, I began to really sob in earnest, loud, choking sobs that tore at me.
Passion For Hire (Passion #5) Page 22
