Unsuccessfully.
Weak, tired, and helpless, he crumbled back to his seat, growling in pain when his head crashed against the back of the bed. Mother yelped, helping him back into a comfortable position, and Father snapped at her that he was fine—the first time I’d ever heard him raise his voice.
Mother’s jaw opened and tensed, and Father shook his head, murmuring apologies, but his grip on the stand tightened until his fists went white.
At this moment, I knew without a speck of doubt that Father would have risked everything to save me from the supposed threat of the beast if only he could have.
He looked up at me, and his gaze was broken. Furious. Determined. Disappointed—in himself.
“I’m sorry,” he said again, his voice tattered with guilt. Something had changed in his tone from earlier, and I knew he wasn’t apologizing for the time I spent taking care of him anymore.
He was apologizing that he’d failed to save me from the deadly beast of legends—and he was apologizing that he’d allowed another daughter to fall to the beast, and he was once again powerless to save her.
He hadn’t given up on his life during his illness like we’d assumed. No, that wasn’t true. He had given up… until I left to save him.
Then, his resolve had returned. Solidified and strengthened, even as the disobedience of his limbs and organs struggled to crush him once again. He’d wanted nothing more than to storm into the forest himself to save me—and he’d wept invisible, silent tears at his inability to do so.
I grit my teeth, knowing what I had to do.
The beast wasn’t dangerous… but there were many monsters in the forest that were, including the brunette man who I suspected had led Connie to the part of the forest he’d found me.
I wasn’t sure if I could find her… but I had to.
Connie was my sister. My beloved, irreplaceable sister. And we had years’ worth of catching up to do.
Taking a deep breath, I gave myself one hug of reassurance; then hugged Father for support, realizing I wasn’t alone anymore. I had my family the way I’d had Shao. They were my pillars of power and energy and discipline, and there was nothing wrong with allowing them to share their strength and love.
“I’ll be back,” I cheered, hoping my forced smile was convincing. “Mother, don’t worry too much. I’ll be back in a few days at the most. Take care of Father; he needs you to help orient him back.”
With those words, I pivoted around and began heading out.
Unsurprisingly, Mother chased me to the living room, rendering my enthusiastic farewell a bit less significant and emotionally charged as it could have been.
Mother restrained my wrist with her hands, but she was weak with fatigue. I had spent months recovering. I whipped away my hand without an ounce of effort as I rushed away and snatched the talismans from the floor where I’d dropped them.
Mother tried to grab me again, and I ducked away. I was afraid to head out and escape for the forest; Mother would no doubt chase me around and try to drag me back, enlisting the townsfolk to help her. That was the best-case scenario, in fact.
The other possibility was that the townsfolk would convince her to let me leave and find Constance… and they’d chase after me as they forced me to find her, leading them straight to Shao’s mansion.
They’d pluck all the roses, and I refused to be complicit in any form of murder—which plucking the roses would be, even if no one would believe me.
They’d attack Shao, deeming him dangerous and evil, and I… I didn’t want him hurt. Not like that.
Circling around the room to dodge her, I took brief glances at the talismans. Although the runes were alien and indecipherable, they had tiny graphite doodles at the top right corners of the paper, and I huffed out a laugh, recognizing the drawing style.
Shao.
Shao had drawn these.
For me? Or for himself? I decided not to dawdle on such useless thoughts, instead focusing on understanding the doodles to see if there was anything that could help me as I continued to dodge Mother, shooting back desperate but sloppy remarks to her begging me to stay.
I paid as little attention to Mother’s words as I did my own, which she didn’t seem to realize thanks to her coalescing emotions of relief at Father’s recovery and fear.
Noticing several coins on a bookshelf, I made sure to head there on my next loop around our small living room, which was the size of one of the cramped half-bathrooms in Shao’s mansion, and snatched them for my carriage ride to the forest.
I had three talismans, one of which had no drawing on it—the one I’d received from Prince Solien. I looked it up and down. Turned it back over. Yet there was nothing to even hint at what the talisman did. Did the royals have the runes memorized? Is that why he didn’t need any sort of reminder?
Not that it mattered. I had a guess as to what his talisman would do, for there was only one spell that made sense for him to have given me.
I hated that the young prince thought I could ever want something like that.
I hated that he’d been right.
I looked back at the other talismans. One had a drawing of flames; the other had a drawing of chains around a wolf. The latter had a miniature clock next to it, hopefully signaling a time limit. No doubt both had been meant as defense against wild beasts—neither of which were here.
I took a deep breath and cringed as I poked out the talisman with chains, then tore it in half, unsure what it would even do. Would the paper itself turn into a snaking, deadly, and utterly worthless whip? Or would chains of electricity appear from the sky, allowing me to use it to block the door behind me as I left, locking Mother within our house?
Neither.
Mother’s gasp and shriek pierced my ears, and I looked at her in shock—but she wasn’t in pain, only bound by shining silver chains that kept her in place.
She began screaming at me about what the crap I’d done—what in the world I’d become—but I didn’t have time to answer her, because I had to save Connie before she was devoured by wolves…
And because a flying, semi-translucent stopwatch had appeared besides her, too, informing me that I had twenty minutes before she was freed.
Huh. I guess the clock doodle on the talisman had been quite literal.
Thank you, Shao’s doodles.
“S-sorry,” I said, wincing. “Um. I wish I could tell you how to at least get to Father, but…” I shrugged because I didn’t know what else to do. I didn’t even know how to disable the magic.
Furthermore, I’d already used up the only tool I had to stop her from chasing after me—if I waited until she was freed for the sole purpose of assuaging my guilt, I’d be screwed out of saving Constance.
Mother might complain about not wanting to lose me, but she’d far prefer moments of grief and fury followed by the safe return of both Constance and me to… losing one of us for good.
I shuddered at the thought.
Mother continued yelling at me, but I tuned her out. “Father’s ears will hurt if you keep yelling,” I said with a carefree wink. “Don’t you want to allow him to rest?”
“He’s rested enough!” She shrieked before screaming at me to release her at once.
Eighteen minutes left.
With a shrug and a half-bow of farewell, I burned the torn talisman into the nearby hearth to remove the evidence it had existed, then rushed out of the house to find Constance.
Chapter 23
Townsfolk were camped outside my house, perhaps predicting I’d leave to find Constance. There weren’t many of them, but the few remaining were enough to block my path.
They whistled, looking away, then feigned a shocked gasp when they noticed me in the doorway, sending me greetings and asking about my day.
Gritting my teeth, I swiftly shut the door behind me, whispered greetings, and told them I had somewhere to be. They made worthless small talk with me as an excuse to follow me around as though they were puppies seeking t
o be walked.
I hated them.
I knew I shouldn’t. I knew I’d do the same thing in their shoes, buried in debt with no way out. Heavens, I’d pestered so many accursed nobles in my desperation to save Father. I was the last person who could judge them.
But hypocrisy grew into thorns wriggling around my throat now that I felt the heavy pressure of saving Constance. My only hope in her survival lied with Gunnar’s survival through the forest and back, but what kind of hope was that?
The man had threatened me, only relenting thanks to Shao’s heroic deed, and I had no doubt he’d attack Constance, too, if he suspected it would benefit him.
I gulped. Heaved a long breath. I stopped in place with a soft albeit tired smile, beginning to answer their thundering storm of questions with as much patience as I could muster—
Halfway through a sentence, I turned and ran for it, sprinting as quickly as I could to the nearby town where I could hire a carriage.
I’d never been more grateful for the gift of pregnancy and aging, which I’d once feared because of the pains associated with it.
The mothers and seniors lacked the energy or strength to catch up to me or keep running for long, while the children who chased after me with glee had legs too short and stubby to catch up to me.
“I can catch her!” A toddler cried out proudly; he was wrong. Sweat licked his forehead. Blood rushed to his cheeks. The distance between us grew until even the kid could no longer dare hope or dream.
“Sh-she’s inhumanly fast, this is unfair!” He cried out. Tinkling, taunting laughter filled the air from the children who slowly caught up to him, then stopped, slapping their knees for support as they panted from the run.
I giggled despite myself as the child deflated, understanding dawning on me. He must have competed against most of the town’s adults, and they’d all slowed their pace during the races to allow him to win—or let him lose by a mere step.
Running felt like habit. Hard, yet familiar. Probably because I’d run this path before—months ago, when I’d first sprinted away from my mother in my search for a carriage to find the beast’s golden roses, then in a desperate hope to reach the forest on foot.
That had been stupid. I hadn’t realized just how deep in the forest the mansion would be.
I must have been blessed by the heavens that Prince Solien had found me right then, I decided. Or irredeemably cursed… but no. Father had been saved, and no amount of heartache over a broken crush could ever compare to the loss of a parent.
Though the heartbreak Shao had given me felt like the end of the world now that I no longer had my grief over Father poisoning my heart as an eternal target of comparison.
This time, I wandered my gaze around as I ran. The day was bright, and the sky was a clear blue with soft, fluffy clouds that I’d have stopped to admire and search for animal-shapes if circumstances were different.
The towns jutted with cheaply built and sloppily designed homes, infinite smoke pumping out the chimneys. There was little beauty in the overgrown roads or the houses, which were packed together like ants on an apple that had lingered on the ground for too long, but it felt like home all the same.
Perhaps half an hour passed. I hastened my pace despite my lungs screaming for a break, and I ran and ran and ran, looking between every nook and cranny of the buildings in fear that someone was following me. Watching me.
The houses grew wider apart and more ornate. Pavement appeared on the ground, its planes flattening and preventing accidental trips… but hurting my knees from the tough pressure shooting up my feet through my joints.
Enduring it, I ran even faster. I choked for air, but I’d suffered this before and survived. I’d survive this, too.
When I decided I was far enough away from my town and close enough to the carriages, which would thankfully be active at this hour.
My eyes darted around; there were people, of course, since this was a more active, populated, middle-class city. But most of them were focused on their own lives and friends, gossiping amongst themselves and smiling as they lived their daily lives.
I felt a pang of nostalgia, remembering the days when I’d lived in a place like this, too. A place of hope. Idle gossip. A place where everyone took things for granted because they could. I’d belonged here, once, and with Father’s recovery, I could belong here again.
But for whatever reason, I found that I didn’t want to. I sought the quiet, peaceful, idyllic life I’d lived with Shao, albeit without the cage of limitations on whom I could meet (no one) or where I could go (nowhere).
Pity that was out of my reach now.
Making sure a thousand times more that no one was looking at me, I crept between two tall buildings into a small, dimly lit alleyway. From there, I snuck into several more alleys, each more cramped than the last, until I was surrounded by darkness and shadow.
I wouldn’t have been surprised if this was the occasional hangout for the less reputable people of society, although there was no one here now. It was an easy and obvious place to find, of course. A place of hurried desperation rather than deliberate crimes.
A shiver of dread crept up my spine, even though the day was still bright enough that I doubted anyone dangerous would appear. I fumbled for my talismans, which I quickly found.
Spotting the charm Prince Solien had offered me, I tore it up into a thousand shreds before tossing it into the nearby meshed trash can. A thundering pop filled my ears, and I was covered up by cotton-candy clouds.
When they dissipated by themselves seconds later, I looked down at my hands, and they looked larger. Tanner. I reached up to touch my hair, and it only reached down to the nape of my neck. I had to strain myself to see the color, tugging a strand of my hair forward for a better view. Blonde. My curls were blonde.
As expected, the talisman had been an illusion spell—the very one the royals had used to conceal their identities.
Had Prince Solien expected me to visit Shao on my own terms when he handed it to me? I doubted he’d known about Constance, meaning that was the only plausible reason behind his generosity.
I grinded my teeth.
Glancing down, I noticed my dress had been replaced by a white top of rough, coarse material, and blue trousers. I blinked, then said the first random syllable that popped into my head to hear my voice.
“Ahh—”
I was a man. My voice was deep and husky, and I felt something large bob up and down my throat… an Adam’s apple? What the heck?
Unexpected, but not unwelcome. No one would recognize me now, which was exactly what I wanted if I was going to go find my sister.
I paced back out to greet the sunlight and frowned when I saw my legs move at a leisurely pace despite my rapid steps.
This made sense after some thought. Shao had said this was only an illusion, and the man’s legs were far longer and stronger than mine. It likely took the man I looked like one languorous step for every two paces I took, and the illusion was compensating for that.
I occasionally saw my arm move up by itself—I wasn’t even doing anything!—and toss a coin up in the air, catching it with the back of my hand. My back was straight, far straighter than it normally was, which guilted me to stop crouching my posture down and confused me at the same time.
I… guess the illusion takes some creative liberties to make my identity seem more plausible? I pondered, furrowing my brows… but if I looked in the mirror, I probably had some sort of placid sneer on my face at best.
My heart and a half, this was the weirdest thing I’d ever experienced, but I’d take it.
I caught the first carriage I could, and I could feel my illusion nod rather than wave at the driver who greeted us with a tip of his hat.
“The beast’s forest,” I said gruffly, the tone surprising me yet again. It felt so jarring, even though I expected it. “Hurry, please. I’m rather in a rush.”
The driver nodded, making little small talk that I answered curtly and h
alf-heartedly as he drove us to the beast’s den.
I wasn’t sure how I’d find the forest, since I’d been asleep for most of my travels there and back, but I dared dream.
Constance and Gunnar would probably talk to each other for most of their walk, and they’d have left some sort of traces on their trek to the forest, whether in the form of footsteps, wheel tracks, or leftover food.
And although Shao and I hadn’t ventured too far away from his safe corner of the forest, I’d gone to quite a few nearby nooks and crannies in my attempt to find herbs for him, and I was positive I’d recognize it if I got within a mile or so of the mansion. I could stumble my way to the clearing I’d met Gunnar from there.
My search for Constance was already on a sour note, filled with fear, desperation, and dreams that were bound to shatter. I brushed away slick beads of sweat as I shook on my seat, jittery from fear and the uncertainty as to my sister’s safety.
The accursed illusionary man didn’t move an inch except to hold his hand in front of his mouth to yawn.
Chapter 24
Constance was beautiful; she’d always been the belle of the academy, having to swat away attention from men as though they were flies. She was a loyal sister, and she wanted to stick by my side whenever she could. Dating was out of the question unless I found someone, first… which I never did.
Constance was brilliant. While I’d laboriously studied the material from classes, sacrificing sleep to ensure I had everything perfectly memorized and understood, she glanced a few times over the textbooks, got bored, called it quits, and slept a full twelve hours before the test—only to score top of our classes with me.
Constance was fiercely loyal to those she trusted and loved, which could be seen in the way she worked so hard to protect me from hard labor. The way she’d fainted several times while trying to support our family.
Apparently, there was one thing Constance wasn’t… and that was careful. Or secretive.
A Kiss like Roses: Fairy Tale Synergy Book 1 Page 19
