No, no, no. I’m not going to worry about how much more my life will change. I’m going to be a yummy mummy who has a fun career, fun friends, a great guy, and an adorable child who is well behaved, with a home in two cities.
I even send Cute Single Man an e-mail telling him that I’m coming to visit and that maybe we can go to a movie. Men will still be attracted to me, even if I’m a mother. Isn’t fertility a turn-on? Perhaps, one day soon, I’ll even get into that sexy dress I wore nine months ago at my engagement party, a.k.a. the Conception Party. (When am I going to find time to get married now?) It was a fabulous dress and should be seen. If I can find the dress. Though I wore it less than a year ago, it seems as though a lifetime has passed.
It’s true that I no longer feel the need to go out and party every night. If I am away from Baby Rowan, even for a minute, I miss her. Coming home early, or not going out at all, won’t be so bad knowing that Baby Rowan is home waiting for me.
But really, this baby is not going to change my life—well, not entirely. I’ll still be me. You can quote me on that.
NOVEMBER 1
4:00 p.m.
“Hey, it’s me,” I say into the phone. I have called the fiancé at the office. I have a very important question that needs to be answered immediately.
“How’s my baby?” he asks.
“Oh, I’m okay.”
“No, I mean Rowan.”
“Oh. She’s fine.” Is this how it’s going to be from now on? “Listen, do you think that I look fat?”
“No, I don’t. Beck, I have to work.”
“Really, just tell me the truth. Do I look fat?
You can tell me. Is my ass—Hello? Hello?”
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Thanks to Denise Bukowski, and the rest of the team at the Bukowski Agency, especially Jackie Joiner, for getting me motivated, forcing me to fill out the dreaded paperwork, and believing in me. To Maya Mavjee, Martha Kanya-Forstner, Stephanie Fysh, Scott Sellers, and the rest of the team at Doubleday, for being so nice and a pleasure to work with. Many thanks also to Allison Dickens. To the Girlfriends who make life easier and fun: Viia Beaumanis, Tassie Cameron, Liza Cooperman, Leanne Delap, Dara Fleischer, Sally Healy, Kim Izzo, Victoria Jackman, Louisa McCormack, Leah McLaren, Ceri Marsh, Jasmine Miller, Marcella Munro, Tralee Pearce, Sheri Segal, Tessa Sproule, Joanna Track, Kama Truch, Dana Yanover-Fields, Tamar Zenith, and, especially, to my best friend and closest confidante, Rebecca Katz. To the Guyfriends: Allen Abel, Mark Gollom, Duncan Jackman, Mark Kingwell, Michael Martin, Andrew Pyper, Jacob Richler, Tim Rostron, Russell Smith, and, especially, to the real Cute Single Man for the Big Macs and watermelon. Thanks to the National Post and the Posties, notably Ben Errett and Sarah Murdoch. Many thanks also to the Ecklers: Lorne, Susan, Michael, Daniel, and Jon, and to my Zaida, Sam Burns, and to the Chetners, Glenda and Dave. Thanks to the mentors: Pamela Wallin, Dianne deFenoyl, Joan Crockatt, and Margaret Atwood. Many thanks to Dr. G. at Mount Sinai in Toronto and to Dr. B. at Foothills Hospital in Calgary. Big thanks to Imelda Acierda. And, of course, to the gym trainers: Sandra at Level V and Dawn at Heavens. My biggest and most heartfelt thanks for last: to Ken Whyte, to whom I owe absolutely everything. Thank you.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
REBECCA ECKLER is a columnist with Canada’s National Post, where she has been for four years, including a stint as a New York–based columnist and feature writer. She says she has the best job in the world. To read some of her recent articles, check out: www.nationalpost.com/commentary/reckler.htm. Her work has also appeared in such publications as Elle, Fashion, Lifestyles, Canadian House & Home, and Mademoiselle. She moved to Calgary to be with her fiancé, who is the father of her baby daughter, Rowan. She is not planning on getting married anytime soon.
Knocked Up is a work of nonfiction, but many of the characters’ names, and certain identifying details, have been changed.
A Villard Books Trade Paperback
Copyright © 2004 by Rebecca Eckler
All rights reserved.
Published in the United States by Villard Books, an imprint of The Random House Publishing Group, a division of Random House, Inc., New York.
VILLARD and “V” CIRCLED Design are registered trademarks of Random House, Inc.
This work was originally published in Canada by Anchor Canada, a division of Random House of Canada Limited, in 2004.
LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA
Eckler, Rebecca.
Knocked up: confessions of a hip mother-to-be / Rebecca Eckler.
p. cm.
1. Eckler, Rebecca. 2. Pregnant women—Biography. 3. Pregnancy—
Popular works. 4. Pregnancy—Humor. I. Title: Confessions of a
hip mother-to-be. II. Title.
RG525.E335 2005
618.2’0092—dc22
[B] 2004053568
Villard Books website address: www.villard.com
www.randomhouse.com
eISBN: 978-0-307-41576-9
v3.0
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