by Patricia Kay
Sure enough, in white letters on a dark wooden shingle was printed: GUIDRY ANTIQUES.
They pulled up in front of the shop, and Jenny hopped out. She walked to the door, read for a minute, then walked back to the car. Smiling, she said, “Jack, write down this number.”
Jack pulled out his notebook and she gave him a telephone number, explaining that that was the number to call in the event of an emergency.
“That must be the Guidrys’ home phone, wouldn’t you think?” she asked Jack.
They drove to the same pay phone they’d used earlier. “Let me call,” Jenny said.
Nicole and Jack agreed. They sat in the car and waited, and Nicole wondered if he was as excited as she was. She doubted it. The thought of finally meeting her double, her unknown cousin, had to mean more to her than it did to him.
As if he’d read her mind, he reached for her hand. “How do you feel?”
“Nervous. Excited. Happy that it looks as if everything’s going to end up okay.”
Jenny was on the phone for a long time. When she finally came back to the car, her eyes were shining. “Let’s go,” she said as she slid into the back seat. “It’s not far.”
Five minutes later they were pulling up in front of a two-story brick house with a wide front porch. The front windows blazed with light.
Nicole and Jack followed Jenny up the walk. Before she even had a chance to knock, the front door was flung open. “Jenny!”
“Oh, Elise!”
Nicole hadn’t gotten much of a look at her cousin. Now as Jenny and Elise embraced, she still couldn’t see much of the other woman’s face. But when they broke apart, and Elise stood back, saying, “Come in. Come in. Oh, Jack, hi!” Nicole got a good look at her, and even though she’d known she and Elise looked alike, still, the shock of seeing her cousin in the flesh was like a jolt of electricity going through her system.
Elise’s eyes widened as her gaze settled on Nicole. “Oh, my God,” she said, clasping her hand over her mouth.
“I—” she looked at Jenny “—I know what you said, but I didn’t believe you. Why, we could be twins.”
Jenny smiled. “Yes, you two look more alike than Jack and I do, and we are twins.”
“Hi. I’m Nicole Cantrelle.” Nicole smiled at Elise, wanting to put her at ease.
Elise gave her a shy smile and held out her hand. Nicole took her hand, then leaned forward and kissed her cousin’s cheek.
“Why don’t you all come into the living room?” Elise said, leading the way to a big room to the left of the foyer. An older woman with straight black hair and glasses stood when they walked in. She smiled.
“This is Cleoma Guidry, a wonderful friend,” Elise said.
“Jack Forrester,” said Jack, shaking Cleoma’s hand. “My sister, Jenny. And this is Nicole Cantrelle.”
Cleoma did a double take. “Blessed Mary, if you aren’t the spittin’ image of Elise.”
“We’re cousins,” Nicole explained. She looked at Elise. “At least I think we are.”
“Before we talk about that, Elise, please tell me what happened while I was in Spain,” Jenny said. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am that I wasn’t there when you needed me."
Elise smiled sadly. “Oh, Jenny. I’m sorry to have put you through so much worry. But when I called and called, and you didn’t call back, I just didn’t know what to think. I. ..I don’t think I was thinking very straight, either. I can’t explain it. All I know is that suddenly I just couldn’t go on the way I had been living—not for another day.” She gave Jenny an anguished look. “Something inside me just fell apart, and I felt frantic. I knew I had to get away before Derek returned from his trip. I was terrified that when he got back he would kill me.”
“Did he threaten to kill you?”
Elise twisted her hands, which had been lying in her lap. “He was always threatening to kill me, but the night before he left for that trip, he found a theater program that I had forgotten I had in my purse. He was furious, wanted to know when I had gone to the theater. Of course, I didn’t dare tell him I was doing some work with the group, so I lied and said I had gone with you. He screamed at me, told me he didn’t want me hanging around with you anymore. He called you names, then called me names. Finally, he started beating me. I... I kind of lost track of the time, but he beat me for a long time.”
She gave a ragged sigh. She avoided everyone’s eyes. “He left the next morning. Right before he left he told me he still wasn’t finished with me, that when he got back he’d tend to me once and for all. He said when he got through with me, I’d wish I’d never been born.”
Jenny reached for Elise’s hand. “Oh, Elise...”
Nicole clenched her fists. She glanced at Jack. His jaw was clamped shut, and his eyes were icy with anger.
“I-I called you that day, and the next day, and the next. I waited as long as I could. I didn’t know what to think. I-I’m sorry to admit this now, but Derek had me so brainwashed, I began to think you probably had changed your mind and didn’t want to become involved with someone as worthless and weak as me.”
“Oh, Elise, how could you think that?” Jenny cried. “You know I’d never feel that way!”
“I know it seems stupid, but you just don’t know what kind of shape I was in,” Elise said. She smiled wryly. “I’m so much better now, thanks to Aunt Marie and Cleoma.” She turned her smile on Cleoma, who sat quietly. She turned back to Jenny. “I’ve been going into Lafayette three times a week for counseling. It’s helped me tremendously.”
“So how did you get here?” Jenny asked.
Elise explained that she’d squirreled away small amounts of money for years, and that the several hundred dollars she’d managed to save was enough to get her to Louisiana.
“How did you travel?” Jack asked.
“By bus.”
He nodded. “I told you it was nearly impossible to trace someone when they ride the bus and pay cash for their ticket,” he said to Nicole.
They talked for a long time. Then Elise turned to Nicole. “Why do you believe we are cousins?” she said.
Heart full, Nicole met Elise’s gaze. She saw the uncertainty. She also saw the bright spark of hope. Nicole smiled gently. “Because I know your father.”
* * *
“Uncle Justin?”
“Nicole? Is there news?”
Nicole smiled at the eagerness she heard in her uncle’s voice. “Very good news.”
“You’ve found her?”
“Yes.”
“Thank the good Lord. My prayers have been answered.”
“And Uncle Justin, I’ve told her about you.”
For a long moment there was silence at the other end of the line. When her uncle spoke, there was a hesitancy in his voice. “Did you tell her how much I would like to meet her?”
“Yes. And she wants to meet you, too.”
She heard his quick intake of breath. “I...I was afraid to hope.”
She smiled. “I know you were.”
“Where is she now? Where are you calling from?”
“We’re in Abbeville. That’s where Elise has been living. She... oh, why don’t I let her tell you? Can you come here tomorrow?”
“Yes, chere, I will be there tomorrow. Just tell me where.”
After they’d hung up, Nicole sat by the phone for a few minutes, gathering her thoughts. She knew her uncle was nervous, perhaps even frightened, but she had also heard the joy in his voice. She knew the next hour or so would be one of the hardest in his life, for now he would have to tell her Aunt Lisette everything. Nicole closed her eyes, said a quick prayer. Oh, she hoped everything would turn out all right. Elise and Justin and Lisette were all fine people who didn’t deserve to be hurt anymore.
Cleoma Guidry insisted on Jack, Jenny and Nicole staying overnight with them. When Jack protested, saying they’d find a motel, Cleoma cut him off. “Absolutely not! This old house is practically empty. Why, I’ve got two more spare bed
rooms—one for you, and one for Nicole—and I know Jenny and Elise have lots of catching up to do, so I’m sure they won’t mind bunking in together.”
So they stayed overnight. Nicole lay in the old-fashioned four-poster bed in one of the guest bedrooms and thought about Jack lying in his bed in the next room. Tonight, when she needed him more than she’d ever needed him before, they were separated by a barrier impossible to bridge. The past week had been so tumultuous, so laden with emotion, so fraught with tension and the knowledge hovering at the back of her mind—the knowledge that soon, so very soon, Jack would be gone.
Long into the night, Nicole’s thoughts whirled, a chaotic mix of happiness that they’d found Elise, trepidation and fear for the reunion of Elise and Justin tomorrow, and a terrible loneliness that increased by the minute.
The next morning, Nicole felt sluggish and miserable. Even the thought of the reunion of father and daughter couldn’t lift her spirits. And when she saw Jack, who was already up and drinking coffee in Cleoma’s kitchen, she knew he’d passed the same kind of sleepless night. His eyes looked haunted, and he looked tired. Nicole felt a pang of guilt. He was still recuperating from his gunshot wound. He probably should still be resting instead of traipsing all over the countryside.
“How are you feeling this morning?” she said softly, walking over to him and laying her hand on his shoulder.
He covered her hand with his own, lifted his gaze. His blue eyes were filled with a longing Nicole recognized. The same longing was piercing her own heart. “I’m feeling okay,” he answered. “How about you?”
She shrugged over the lump in her throat. Suddenly she couldn’t bring herself to pretend. Swallowing hard, she turned away from the regret and sorrow, the I-wish-things-could-be-different-but-we-both-know-they-can’t look so obvious in his expression.
When Elise and Jenny joined them in the kitchen, some of the strain Nicole was feeling eased. It was hard to feel sorry for herself in the face of what Elise had in store for her this morning. When Nicole saw Elise’s hands tremble as she poured herself a cup of coffee, all thoughts of her own misery fled in the face of Elise’s anxiety. She walked over to the kitchen counter where Elise was standing, put her arm around her cousin. “It’ll be all right,” she murmured. “You’re going to like him very much.”
Elise, who was facing away from the others, closed her eyes. “I...I’ve dreamed of this day for so long. But I’m so afraid. What...what if he doesn’t like me?” she whispered.
“Bring your coffee. Let’s go into the other room and talk,” Nicole said quietly, giving Jack a meaningful glance over her shoulder.
He nodded, quick understanding flashing in his eyes.
When Nicole and Elise were sitting side by side on the Victorian sofa in the living room, Nicole took Eiise’s hand. “I’d like to tell you about your father.”
Eiise’s dark eyes, bright with unshed tears, lifted to meet Nicole’s. Bottom lip trembling, she nodded.
Holding fast to her cousin’s hand, Nicole said, “From the time I was a little girl, Uncle Justin has always been my favorite person in the whole world, next to my parents and sister and brothers. He...he has a goodness of heart, a generosity and warmth, that people just immediately respond to.” She looked deep into Eiise’s eyes. “You will love him. And he will love you. You’ll see.”
A lone tear rolled down Eiise’s cheeks, and she brushed it away.
Nicole took a long breath. “I know he’s going to want to tell you about his relationship with your mother himself. But I’d like to tell you something about me, and Uncle Justin, that might help you when you meet him.” So Nicole told Elise how she’d become pregnant with Aimee, the heartbreak, the misery, the shame that had followed. How Justin and Lisette had welcomed her into their home, how they’d loved her and encouraged her, how they’d helped her understand she wasn’t a bad person because she’d made a mistake. She told her how understanding they were, how they didn’t sit in judgment of her.
“They’ve always been like that,” Nicole concluded. “As far back as I know. Whenever other people would talk about someone, make disparaging remarks, I always remember Uncle Justin and Aunt Lisette being the voice of reason, the ones who would caution against judging someone else. Uncle Justin’s favorite expression is, ‘until you’ve walked in his shoes, you have no right to condemn.’ ”
“My...my mother never condemned him,” Elise offered. “And she raised me to keep my head high. She said there was no shame in the circumstances of my birth, that I was conceived in love and a sharing of spirits, and I should always remember that. She...she said my father was a man of honor, and that if it had been possible, he would have been with us.”
“Your mother sounds like a wonderful woman,” Nicole said.
“She was. I loved her very much.”
“I’m curious about something, Elise. How much did your husband know about your background? Didn’t he know you had an aunt who lived in Abbeville?”
Elise shook her head. “Derek was never interested in me. When we met, my mother was already dead, and I had always told everyone my father was dead—except Jenny, that is. When Derek and I went out, he always talked about himself, and I was such a mouse and so unsure of myself where men were concerned, that I just naturally let him. Anyway, when we got married, I couldn’t very well change my story about my father, so I just never told him.” She bowed her head. “Thinking about it now, listening to how that sounds, makes me realize what a sham my marriage was. I mean, if I couldn’t tell Derek something so fundamental, what kind of relationship did we have?”
The question hung in the air. Nicole squeezed Elise’s hand again.
“The subject of my Great-aunt Marie never came up,” Elise continued softly. “I always knew about her, of course. When I was a little girl, my mother used to take me to see her, and I remembered how kind she was. I wrote to her after Derek and I were married, but by that time, she was going blind and couldn’t write back, so I didn’t hear from her. When she went into the nursing home, she did have one of the nuns write to me to tell me where she was. One thing she said that I didn’t forget was, if you ever need anything, come to see me.” Elise picked up her neglected cup of coffee, took a swallow, grimaced. “It’s cold.” She put it back on the coffee table, extricating her hand from Nicole’s in the process.
“I never told Derek about the letter. He was out of town on a sales trip when it came, and I... I hid it in the bottom of one of my shoeboxes. At the time, I don’t even know why I hid it. He hadn’t started... beating me yet. Although...” She looked away. “He had abused me emotionally for years. I guess...on some level...I knew that.” She sighed. “When I didn’t hear from Jenny and knew I’d have to figure out something on my own, I remembered the letter. I took it out... and you know the rest.”
Nicole slipped her arm around Elise’s slender body. “From now on, things are going to be different. You’ll see.” She kissed her cousin’s cheek. “You’ve found the rest of your family. You’re one of us.”
Shortly before noon, Justin arrived. In deference to the emotional turmoil they knew this meeting would produce, Cleoma, Jack and Jenny had left the house for a couple of hours. Elise had asked Nicole to stay with her.
So when Justin rang the front doorbell, Nicole answered the door. He enfolded her in a quick hug, then looked around. “Where is she?”
Nicole inclined her head toward the living room. He closed his eyes for a brief moment, then said in a firm voice. “I’m ready.”
When they walked into the sunny living room, Nicole, for one crystal moment, saw Elise the way her uncle would see her: sitting quietly on the sofa, hands clasped loosely in her lap. Her shining dark hair was pulled back from her face, held there by a thin blue ribbon. She wore a matching blue dress made from some kind of soft, silky material that draped over her slender curves. Her face was pale, but composed, and her dark eyes looked like huge chunks of shiny marble. She rose slowly as they approached, her
gaze fastened behind Nicole, on her father.
“Mafille,” Justin whispered.
My daughter. Shivers raced over Nicole’s spine.
And then she was standing in the background, throat clogged with tears she tried to suppress, as Justin brushed past her, opened his arms wide, and Elise, like someone in a dream, floated into them.
Over Justin’s shaking shoulders, Nicole saw the expression of pain, and love, and hope, that twisted Elise’s face as she was clasped in her father’s strong arms. Tears rolled down her cheeks, and then they were both crying and holding on to each other.
“Papa,” Elise whispered.
Nicole couldn’t watch anymore. She didn’t belong here. This was a private moment.
Quietly, she slipped out of the room, then just as quietly, opened the front door and walked out onto the veranda. For something to do, and to still her quaking insides, she walked down the front steps and into the yard.
It was then she saw her aunt.
Lisette sat in the front seat of Justin’s big sedan. For a moment, Nicole’s eyes met her aunt’s, then Lisette slowly opened the door and got out of the car.
“Aunt Lisette,” Nicole said. She walked quickly over to the older woman, whose expression seemed sad and full of yearning. “Oh, Aunt Lisette. I didn’t know you were here.”
They hugged, and Nicole could feel the trembling in her aunt’s body. What courage it must have taken for Lisette to come.
“How is it going in there, chere?” Lisette said. “Will my Justin be okay?”
Nicole could hardly speak. She blinked back tears and nodded reassuringly. “Yes. Yes. Everything is fine.” Nicole put a reassuring arm around her aunt’s shoulders, and they stood side by side, waiting in the brilliant autumn sunshine. “Are you okay, Aunt Lisette? This must have been quite a shock for you.”
Lisette smiled sadly. “Oh, chere, I’ve always had a strange feeling about Michelle Sonnier. I drove my Justin into her arms, you know. I wasn’t a good wife to him. I punished him because I felt so inadequate, so much of a failure when I couldn’t give him a child. Every time...” She faltered, and Nicole could see tears glistening on her lashes. “Every time my Justin touched me, I felt guilty and miserable. For years, even though we managed to put everything that happened behind us, I’ve been haunted by the knowledge that I was the one who was to blame for everything. And now, I don’t know, I can’t explain it, but this child, this daughter of Justin’s, has set me free.” She smiled through her tears. “I feel almost reborn. It’s the most wonderful feeling.”
