Chapter 3
Callum was most certainly not the man of my dreams, nor was he someone I wanted to spend any considerable amount of time with, whatsoever. This was apparent from our first tea together on the porch and my feelings for him progressed from mild intolerance to teeth-grinding irritation as the weeks wore on. He was nice enough to me, although a little indifferent at times, but something about him just grated on my nerves. Maybe it was the fact that I was being forced to like him, and apparently even to someday love him. The idea was unimaginable to me. The wedding was approaching fast and the closer it got, the more I refused to accept it and tried to push Callum from my mind. Nevertheless, we were forced to spend more and more time together and every date that was made for us was countered with a ready-made excuse from me.
"But Mama," I whined, knowing it would be in vain, "I have to finish knitting Gabelle's shawl. I know her birthday's not till October, but she really needs it before school starts. It's getting so cold."
Gabelle was a little girl who lived in the house next to us. I kind of thought of her as a little sister. And I wasn't lying; it was cold, still colder every day. She would need the shawl, only I was a fast knitter and would have plenty of time to finish it, with or without the afternoon off.
My mother was unwavering in her certainty that I would meet Callum this afternoon. "Look, Emerin, you cancelled two days ago because of your headache...you can't cancel again. How would that look? You need to spend some more time getting to know the boy. He's really a good lad and he seems to like you despite your...well...problems. You're getting married in two days, Emerin. It's about time you accepted it."
"Exactly! This Sunday my life is over...can't I just enjoy the last few days that I have?"
"Stop being so dramatic; everything will be fine. You will learn to love this boy, the same way I did your father, the same as every other woman in this village has. This is how it works honey, how it always has; you know that."
"Yes, yes, I know. I'm going," I knew there was no point in continuing to argue. "But if Gabelle is cold when she's walking to school, let that be on your conscience."
My mother smirked. "I'm pretty sure Gabelle has other shawls; she will be fine."
"But none as nice as mine," I tossed back as I walked through the door. As it closed behind me and I stared across the fields toward the mountains, I briefly thought of making a run for it, before common sense once again took over. I waved at my father who was baling hay in the fields and turned down the worn dirt path to Callum's house. I walked slowly, figuring the more time I wasted on my walk, the less time I would have to spend with him. My hopes were dashed though, when I spotted Callum strolling up the pathway to meet me. He smiled when he saw me and I felt guilty for not being as accepting of this as he seemed to be.
"Hey, Emerin," he called out brightly. "Guess who's back in town?"
It was a strange comment; I didn't think that anyone had left town. "What do you mean?" I said, as the gap between us narrowed.
"David...you know, David the Nebril, he got in late last night. Jalya told me this morning that she'd seen him; you know how she likes to wander around at night when she's not supposed to. Well, anyway, I saw him for myself when I was walking over....seems to have his cart all loaded up again."
David had been so popular when he was last in town, that he sold almost all of his wares in just a few days. I guess he thought that a profit was to be made here and decided to load up and come back. It was rare enough to have a Nebril pass through our village, let alone to have one decide to come back a second time. Most of the Nebril merchants, not wanting to make such a long, perilous journey, stuck to the farming communities that were closer to their city.
"I guess he must like it here," I mused. "It's been so long since anyone's come through here that everyone's been desperate for supplies."
"Yeah, well, I thought maybe we could go over and see him, and y'know, see if he has anything we might need for the house. I know that we're probably getting enough from our parents, but I thought maybe you'd like something special, something new, maybe." He lowered his eyes as he said this, rooting his gaze on the pathway where he was grinding his boot into the dirt. "It's only two days away, after all."
I didn't say anything; he was being too nice. Why did I have to be so weird about the whole thing? Why couldn't I just accept it like everyone else seemed to? He wasn't so bad; why did I find him so annoying? Why did I want to run away from him at every turn? I fought back the tears that threatened to spring to my eyes and looked out over the wheat stalks as they swayed, golden in the sunlight. When I glanced back toward him, he was studying me intensely, his green eyes darting from side to side, as if trying to take in a picture too large to completely comprehend at once.
"Okay," I said, trying to hold my voice steady.
Callum turned and we walked along the path in the direction from which he had come. We were quiet for a minute and I used this time to try to get my emotions under control. Maybe my mother was right; maybe everyone was right and I just didn't get it. I couldn't help feeling though, that there was something else out there for me, some other fate that didn't involve marrying Callum, having his babies and being a farmer's wife. I felt it strongly every time I had a headache, every time I felt that unknown pull from the other side of the mountains. Did other women feel this way before they got married? Was it a feeling that would fade in time as my life became more entwined with Callum's or would I eternally struggle with sadness and a sense of unfulfillment?
"Emerin?" Callum said uneasily, interrupting my thoughts.
"Yes?"
"Look, I know you're nervous and I am too, but that's normal you know."
"I know....you're nervous?"
"Yeah, I really am. I mean it's gonna be really different, right? But Mama and Papa, they said that they felt the same way. In fact, Mama said that she didn't even like Papa at all when they were first united...she didn't want to marry him, but over the years he grew on her. Now she really loves him."
"My parents told me the same thing."
"Well, there you go, I'm sure they know what they're talking about. They're old and old people are supposed to be wise, am I right?"
"Yeah," I forced a nervous laugh. I wished he would stop being so nice to me; it was making it harder to dislike him.
We rounded the bend in the path, and David and his cart came into view. It was early in the day, but there was already a swarm of people milling about, haggling with David, trying to trade food, animal skins and crudely fashioned tools for dishes, linens and fancy big city merchandise. Jalya was there looking longingly at jewelry she had nothing valuable enough to trade for. Salare buzzed around close to David, so she could get in a few words to him between each sale.
Jalya bounced over as she saw us approach. "Can you believe that he's actually come back again? Who would've thought he'd want to make this trip twice. Emerin, you should come and see the clothes and jewelry he has. Gorgeous."
I glanced at Callum and opened my mouth, about to tell Jalya that I'd much rather be looking at dishes and linens. Callum spoke first however. "Go ahead, Emerin...I see Lenal over there anyway. I have to talk to him about the harvest. I'll meet you at the cart in a few minutes."
"Okay," I said, grateful for some time to chat with Jalya. "See you soon."
Callum turned and strode across the field. In the glimmering sunlight, I could see that he was almost as muscular as Lenal was, only his height made him appear thinner. Even his nose wasn't so bad, I thought to myself.
"So how are things going with you and him?" Jalya asked. "Are you ready for the wedding, or are you still thinking about taking off before Sunday? Because, as you can see, David's back with his cart!"
"I don't know what to do," I answered, and I honestly didn't. "He seems nice and he treats me pretty well, but I don't know, I don't really feel anything for him."
"I don't think you're supposed to, not at the start anyway."
"I know, but...." I trailed off, unable to explain how I felt. My head had begun to hurt....again. I was getting really tired of it. And the urge to walk to the mountain was becoming increasingly difficult to fight.
"Come on," Jalya wrapped her arm protectively around me. "Let's go look at all the pretty jewels. That will make you feel better, and maybe if you keep making that sad face, your husband to be will buy you some of them to cheer you up."
I doubted that Callum had anything to trade that was worth enough for David to relinquish a piece of jewelry, especially when we were supposed to be getting sensible things for the house. I kept that thought to myself, however, and let Jalya believe she was making me happier as we rummaged through the hanging necklaces and boxes full of bracelets and rings. The jewelry was beautiful, and by the time we had pawed through it all, I actually was having a good time. Maybe if I still had time to hang out with Jalya once in a while, being married might not be that bad. Though, once I had a couple of kids, our hanging out time would probably dwindle and I'd be with Callum a lot more than I'd be with Jalya. I tried not to dwell on these thoughts as they threatened to drag me down into sadness once more, so I turned my attention to the clothing instead. Just as I'd gotten to the first display, which was a rack of lovely dresses that were so fancy I couldn't imagine where I would ever wear them, the church bell began to ring.
"Oh no," Jalya whined in exasperation. "Why now? Why not when I'm doing something I don't want to be doing!"
There was good reason for her irritation. The only time the church bell rang, other than on Sunday mornings, was to warn of some kind of danger, like severe weather coming or a rabid animal in the village. But usually it was a sighting of one of the woodland tribes passing nearby and the elders were paranoid that they were going to unleash some sort of attack on us. Of course this never happened and, in my seventeen years, I could not remember it ever having happened, and neither could my parents. All we knew is that there were stories of neighbouring farming villages being raided, with food and women both being stolen. I wasn't sure how much truth was in these tales, but that didn't stop the elders from herding us up and sending us into the nearest building for sanctuary until we were given the all clear. Or rather the women and children were penned up and the men got to go out and see what was going on. Being a girl was so boring.
Without pausing to finish up their business, the women and children around us reluctantly began trudging toward the trading post, which was the closest sanctuary point to where David's cart stood. As usual, Jalya and I hesitated as long as we possibly could, to see if we could see any of the action.
Callum rushed over to us. "C'mon, you two have to get inside," he stated, in what I could only assume was his manly, protective voice. I wondered vaguely if that was the same tone that he would use with our children. "Go on, get over to the trading post. I'll come and find you later." He nudged me in the general direction of where we were to be imprisoned, before heading back toward Lenal.
The door of the trading post opened as soon as we got there, and we were met by the wrinkled face of Mrs. Enos, one of the town elders.
"Well, come on girls, hurry on up now; you don't wanna git stolen or beat on or eaten alive or anything like that now do ya?" The old woman beat on the front step with her walking stick. "Did you girls see anyone else lingerin' around out there?"
"No, ma'am," Jalya said, "I think everyone else has found their way to a sanctuary."
"I do hope those boys find all the children; sometimes they like to sneak off and play in the woods," Mrs. Enos croaked, before poking us inside with her stick and closing the door. "You girls have to learn to move faster. If an ole lady like me can beat ya inside, then I dunno what’s wrong witchya!"
Jalya and I ran over to the side window of the trading post, which allowed for the best view of the valley and waited to see if there would be any action, though it was unlikely. We stared through the grime coated glass and watched Callum and Lenal explain to David what was happening. Then the three of them ran off toward the church, which was the meeting place for the men during such emergencies.
"What do you think it is this time?" I asked.
Jalya scoffed. "Probably some outland savage walked too close to the crops again, daring to come on our side of the mountain. Hey, Emerin, maybe if you run back outside, he'll steal you away. Some of those clansmen are really good looking. I've seen them pass from time to time at Mama's house. No one's ever tried to steal me though." She turned to study my face. "What's the matter? Do you have a headache? You've got your headache face on."
"I'm getting one, yeah."
"Well, do you want to sit down? I can go see if Miss Telly has some facion bark behind the counter. That's what my mother takes for her headaches. I'm sure she'd let you have some."
"It's fine, Jalya, that stuff doesn't work for me anyway. It only makes me sleep." I peered out the window trying to focus my eyes on the top of the mountain in the distance. I'd spent so many years studying those mountains. I knew every curve and crevasse, every rocky outcropping, and something didn't seem quite right. Something was there that hadn't been there before.
"Yeah, that's what Mama says too. It's funny you know, your headaches, the way you act sometimes is so much like her. I think maybe you should talk to her about it; maybe she can help. Emerin, are you listening...are you sure you're okay?"
"I'm fine," I said, but I was only half listening, only dimly aware of what was going on around me. I focused all the energy my sore head could offer on the figure on the mountain. It was getting closer.
"What is that?" Jalya inquired, having turned her attention back to the window.
"I don't know." My head began to throb, the left side feeling curiously disconnected from the right. Pressure built around my eye and the pain moved down the back of my head and overtook the left side of my neck. I reached my hand up to rub the tension away.
"Is that....a person?" Jalya's voice rose a little.
"Shhhh," I said instinctively, and looked around to see if anyone else had heard. The rest of the women were showing off their purchases to each other, secure in the idea that this would again be an uneventful emergency. Nobody seemed to be paying us any attention. "Listen Jalya, don't let anyone else know about him."
"About him? What do you mean? Who is it? Emerin, how do you know it's a him?"
"Or her," I added quickly, hoping to keep her quiet. "Just....trust me Jalya, no one else should know."
"Okay," she said reluctantly, but didn't take her eyes off the figure moving in the distance. "Looks like a clansman. Which one do you think? A Harachu, or maybe a Natki?"
I shrugged my shoulders, not wanting even the sound of my own voice to break my concentration. The more I watched the shadow wavering across the hilltop, the more at ease I felt. As if it were here just for me, or perhaps even a part of me that had been lost long ago. The pain in my head lessened slightly, yet each throb pulled at me, urging me to walk out the door.
As the figure drew closer, the impulse strengthened and I rested my hands on the cool glass of the window, wishing my fingernails were sharp enough to claw my way through it. Though I was standing perfectly still, I felt myself running, my swift legs carrying me across the field, through the stalks of corn and up into the foothills to where he was waiting for me. Yes, it definitely was the form of a man that I saw moving toward us.
"He's coming closer, Emerin," Jalya whispered. "Do you think maybe we should tell somebody now? The men would need to know if there was a threat."
"No," I almost shouted. "Jalya, listen to me, he's no threat. Besides they probably already know that he's there; that's why they rang the bell in the first place!"
My head began a renewed aching, that I knew from experience could only be relieved by walking, walking in the direction that I felt compelled to go. I still couldn't take my eyes from this mysterious, yet somehow familiar figure, and watched him become larger as the distance closed between us. I had to go; I had to get
out of here now; it was unbearable. It felt like part of my body, or maybe even my very soul was detaching and moving toward those mountains, trying in vain to drag the rest of me along with it while I resisted in some internal game of tug of war. Why was I resisting? I needed to be there; I just had to find a way out of here. Using every ounce of effort I could muster, I wrenched my strained and weeping eyes from their outside obsession, and turned to face Jalya.
"You know what," I groaned. "I think that I'm just desperate enough to try the facion bark now; maybe it will work this time. Could you see if Miss Telly has some? I really don't feel like talking to her myself. And if, when you get back, he's getting closer still, then we'll say something, okay?"
"Okay," Jalya agreed. "I'll be right back; you just keep an eye on him while I'm gone, alright?"
"I will," I was relieved, though I knew it would work. Jalya always humoured me when I had a headache. She gave me a sympathetic rub on my shoulder and turned toward the counter where Miss Telly was admiring the new dress that one of the ladies had bought. I waited until she slipped into the crowd then began to edge my way along the wall toward the door. Mrs. Enos was leaning back in the rocking chair behind the counter, resting her eyes, or maybe even actually sleeping. No one else paid me any attention as I nonchalantly shuffled in the direction of freedom. I peeked through the heads of the chattering women and saw that Jalya had just gotten Miss Telly's attention. I had to move fast.
I slid along the last few feet of the wall, and felt my right hand bump up against the doorknob. I turned toward the door, reached up and slid the bolt across to unlock it, and turned the knob. Fortunately, all the voices ringing out at once obliterated any sound that this may have made. I threw one more glance back at Jalya and saw that she'd broken off her conversation with Miss Telly and was looking back in the direction of the window, where she wouldn't find me. It was now or never. I yanked on the metal doorknob, slipped out through the smallest crack I could possibly fit through, and shut the door quickly behind me.
Guardians of the Light (Book One of The Nebril Riverland Chronicles) Page 3
