Bernadette thought it was ironic that even though the nature of their dilemmas was vastly different, she and Arizona were both in situations where they had to make a hard decision about the man they loved.
Chapter 23
TESS
Over the last four months Tess’s pain from her fibroids and endometriosis had gotten so bad that some days she could barely get out of bed. Yet despite her challenging health problems, her relationship with Maceo had blossomed into nothing short of a storybook romance fit for one of her novels. Tess could honestly say that she was no longer a skeptic when it came to love—she was a believer. She was the happiest she’d been since she could remember.
When Tess had come to Bourbon during the first week of February, she’d been on a mission to finish her manuscript and get her mind right. For the first time in her writing career she’d missed her submission deadline to her editor, which had been due to her frazzled mental, emotional, and physical state. She hadn’t realized how off balance her life had been until she’d arrived in Bourbon. She couldn’t thank Bernadette enough for inviting her to stay at her house because had it not been for Bernadette’s love, support, and generosity, Tess knew she would have continued to wilt in Chicago instead of bloom in Bourbon. And thanks to the new love in her life, she was now happier than she could ever remember feeling. Coming to Bourbon had changed her life, and Maceo had changed her world.
Maceo was supportive of Tess as a person and of her career as a novelist, and she knew this because of the things that he consistently told her and showed her. He offered encouraging words of support when she felt stuck with her manuscript, and he delivered delicious home-cooked meals to her door when she was squirreled away in her writing cave, unable to venture into the outside world for fear that she’d disrupt her writing rhythm. His support had helped her finish and submit her manuscript two weeks ago, and both her agent and editor had told her it was her best book to date.
Maceo was the reason why many things in Tess’s life had improved. His genuine love and no-frills, everyday laid-back way of living helped tame the wild, impulsive side of herself that sometimes caused her to make erratic decisions. His strength and vulnerability allowed her to open up her true feelings and accept the love that she had never felt worthy of, and his optimism and drive pushed her to look at life in a more positive way. And although she was still stubborn, quick tongued, and excitable, she’d become more patient, compassionate, and introspective. Tess could hardly believe the change that she saw within herself, and she knew a large part of it was because of Maceo. He’d even begun talking about engagement and marriage.
Tess’s new outlook on life and her relationship with Maceo had led her to make the decision to move from Chicago to Bourbon. Two weeks ago when she’d pressed Send and submitted her manuscript, she’d poured a glass of wine and then called one of her Chi-town friends who was a Realtor and begun the process to put her house on the market. Since she’d made that decision, things had been moving quickly. She’d set the wheels into motion to list her home, and in the meantime, Bernadette had told her she was welcome to stay with her for as long as she wanted or until Maceo popped the question and they got married, which it was almost certain to happen soon, given how their relationship was unfolding.
Tess had flown back to Chicago yesterday so she could meet with her Realtor and start coordinating her move. But she’d also scheduled the trip so she could meet with Dr. Gina, her long-time trusted OB-GYN . . .
Tess had just undressed and she was lying on the exam table, nervously scrolling through her phone as she waited for Dr. Gina to come in and start the exam. Tess couldn’t help but smile as she looked at the photos that she and Maceo had taken over the last few months. She knew that her life had become rich and full, but looking at picture after picture brought home the reason why.
Between her stretches of long days and nights in her writing cave, Tess would emerge for the day, and when she did, Maceo was right there to fill her hours with fun and electric energy. She looked at the memories they’d captured, from eating at his restaurant, to enjoying fun at the beach, to triple-dating with Bernadette, Coop, Arizona, and Chris, to selfies as she and Maceo fed each other ice cream. She knew she was truly blessed.
Tess’s mind was brought into focus when Dr. Gina entered the room.
“Tess, it’s so good to see you!” Dr. Gina said with warm enthusiasm. She leaned in and gave Tess a gentle hug. “How have you been, dear?”
Tess loved Dr. Gina because not only was she one of the best OB-GYNs in the Chicago area, she was caring and took a genuine interest in her patients, which made them feel like a person and not a medical chart full of problems. At only four feet eleven inches tall, Dr. Gina was short in stature but she commanded a giant presence when she walked into a room. Tess smiled. “I’m in love,” she said happily.
For the first five minutes of her appointment, Tess told Dr. Gina about Maceo, how they’d met, and the love he showered upon her every day. Tess smiled wide as she scrolled through a few pictures on her phone, showing Dr. Gina photos of Maceo and her. Then Dr. Gina’s nurse assistant entered the room and it was time for the exam. Dr. Gina’s assistant placed Tess’s phone on the counter while Tess reclined back onto the exam table and braced herself for pain.
“Just relax,” Dr. Gina said in a soothing voice. “We’ll be finished before you know it.”
This was the part of her visit that Tess had been dreading. She scooted her hips to the edge of the exam table, spread her legs, and placed her feet in the hard stirrups. Tess tried to relax as Dr. Gina had instructed, but she’d already been in pain when she’d walked into the office, so she knew she was about to experience even more discomfort. She closed her eyes and saw bright white stars when she felt the cold speculum enter her vagina and then spread her apart.
“Tell me more about the amazing love of your life,” Dr. Gina said.
Tess knew that the woman was trying to take her mind off the pain, so she tried to talk about the love she was grateful to have. But she was in so much discomfort that even the thought of Maceo didn’t quell the stabbing sensation inside her. Tess knew that if it hadn’t been for the grace of God, along with copious amounts of herbal teas, pain medication that she’d occasionally taken, and Bernadette’s constant support and encouragement, she wouldn’t have been able to have gotten through most days. Her condition was the one thing in their relationship that Tess had kept secret from him. She knew that Maceo had a huge desire to have children and that he looked at her as the woman who could give him at least two and possibly three if they worked fast.
The longer Tess waited to tell Maceo about her fibroids and endometriosis, the harder it was to divulge the truth. She knew he’d immediately ask why she had kept the truth from him, and she didn’t want to run the risk of disappointing him, yet every day that she kept quiet she was unknowingly pushing them further apart.
“Okay, we’re finished with this part of the exam,” Dr. Gina said with a nod. “And you know the routine.”
“Yes,” Tess responded. “I hope the lab results will come back sooner than they did the last time because I’m nervous, plus, I’m only in town for a few days, so if the results come back and I need to see a specialist . . .”
“Let’s jump one hurdle at a time,” Dr. Gina cautioned. “I’ll put a rush on your lab work and try to get it back before you leave.”
“Okay.”
“Now it’s time for the last part of your exam.”
Tess nodded. “I know the drill with this, too.” She winced in pain as Dr. Gina inserted a finger inside her vagina while she pressed on the top of Tess’s abdomen with her free hand.
“Does this feel sore, tender, or painful?” Dr. Gina asked.
“All of the above.”
“I’m sorry, dear. I’m trying to be as gentle as I can,” Dr. Gina said as she continued what Tess likened to kneading dough on her stomach. “Your abdomen is clearly enlarged, and it feels like not only h
ave your fibroids grown in size, you have more clusters.”
Tess hadn’t needed an exam to tell her what Dr. Gina had just diagnosed. Her usually flat tummy now had a little bulge. Maceo had rubbed the tiny bump on her stomach one night and had said that he loved every inch of her body. Tess had wanted to cry because she’d known that he’d meant it, and she’d also known that her stomach stood a better chance of growing from fibroids rather than a baby.
Dr. Gina removed her gloves and told Tess she could sit up straight. “I think we need to do a transvaginal ultrasound.”
Tess couldn’t bear the thought of another exam or anything else probing inside her. “Not today.”
“How long will you be in town?”
“Through the end of the week.”
“Your lab results should be back in two days. Can you come then?”
Tess nodded. “Yes, I’ll be here.”
After her appointment, Tess raced through afternoon traffic, feeling good to be behind the wheel of her Mercedes again after several months of being away. She weaved in and out of traffic until she reached her home. She knew she wouldn’t have any problem selling her house because it was in a prime, upscale location, and for the seven figures she would clear after closing costs, she and Maceo could build a mini mansion in Bourbon if they wanted to. But she knew they wouldn’t because they both wanted to live a nice but simple life.
Once Tess got home she called Maceo and they talked for nearly two hours.
“I’m thinking about flying out there tomorrow night,” Maceo said.
Tess immediately panicked. She had an ultrasound scheduled for the day after tomorrow. She hadn’t told Maceo about her OB-GYN visit this morning, and she definitely didn’t want him to know that she was having a follow-up procedure. “I thought you were super busy at the restaurant,” Tess countered.
“I’m never too busy when it comes to my woman. You’ve only been gone one day and I already miss you. Now that you’re finished with your book we can spend more time together, and besides, I can help you with anything you might need around your house.”
“Aww, that’s so sweet, and I miss you, too,” Tess said with sincerity. “But I know that you’re short-staffed, and if you leave right now it could create a worse problem when you get back. I’ll be in your arms by the end of this week and we can catch up on lost time.”
“I like that last part,” Maceo said with a sexy laugh. “Tess . . .”
“Yes?”
“I love you, and I thank God every day that he brought you into my life.”
“I thank him for you, too.”
Later that evening Tess settled onto her couch with a glass of wine and a deli sandwich. She knew she should be sipping green tea, known for shrinking fibroids, and eating organic veggies and baked salmon, which she’d read could help quell the pain caused by her endometriosis. But that had been her standard fare for the last few months, and despite Maceo’s excellent culinary skills that had made eating bland food more tolerable, her condition had worsened.
So tonight she was indulging. She was also looking forward to talking with Bernadette and Arizona in a few minutes because she needed to focus on someone else’s life instead of her own. She knew that Bernadette was still trying to adjust to a healthy work/life balance after being such a die-hard workaholic for most of her career. And Arizona was trying to decide if she was going to call off the wedding and lose a good man who loved her or marry him and put up with unfulfilling sex.
When Tess’s phone rang she immediately picked up. “What’s up, ladies!” she said, happy to be connected with her friends.
“You sound great,” Arizona said. “You must be drinking wine.”
“As a matter of fact I am, and tonight I’m enjoying a smooth Pinot Grigio and a Chicago-style deli sandwhich.”
Bernadette chimed in. “No more organic this and grain-fed that. Now that you’re finished with your book you’re cutting loose, and I don’t blame you because you deserve it. I’m proud of you, cuz.”
“Me too.” Arizona joined in. “And speaking of cutting loose, I know it’s an adjustment to be back in the city after spending so much time in Bourbon over the last few months.”
Tess took another sip before she answered. “It’s different. And the funny thing is that I thought I’d really miss the city, but now that I’m here, and it’s only my first night back, I miss Bourbon.”
Bernadette laughed. “You don’t miss Bourbon, you miss your man here in Bourbon.”
“And more importantly, I miss his magic stick,” Tess teased, and then immediately regretted her words. “I’m sorry, Arizona.”
“Girl, that’s okay. I’m glad to know that somebody’s gettin’ some good lovin’, ’cause I know I’m not. And as you both know, it’s not just because we’re practicing abstinence . . .” Arizona couldn’t finish because of the sadness in her voice.
Tess knew Arizona was at her wits’ end. And with less than two weeks to go until she was scheduled to walk down the aisle, she still didn’t know what she was going to do.
“Ladies, I know I’m always asking for advice,” Arizona said. “But what I really need is prayer.”
“You’re always in my prayers, Arizona,” Bernadette said.
Tess spoke up. “And mine as well.”
“Thanks, ladies. I’ve been praying every night and I’m still so confused.”
“Arizona,” Bernadette said, “What are you praying for?”
“That God guides me to make the right decision.”
“Can I offer some advice?” Bernadette said.
Tess couldn’t wait to hear what Bernadette was going to say because she knew whatever came out of her cousin’s mouth, it was going to be good, and Tess could probably apply it to her own life.
“Sure,” Arizona said. “I’m all ears.”
“Me too,” Tess echoed.
“I’m not trying to be preachy, but when you ask him for guidance, also ask for the other things you want, and be specific.”
“How does she sound asking God for a big one and explosive downtown action?” Tess blurted out.
“Tess, please . . .”
Arizona stepped in. “Tess is right, Bernadette. I don’t think God is going to make Chris’s penis any bigger than it already is, and at this point I can’t even think about his lack of oral skills.”
Bernadette sighed. “I agree that God isn’t going to make Chris’s penis grow, but what he can do is grow your future husband’s knowledge of your body and how to truly please you. Chris might not be able to give you oral sex that’ll curl your toes, but God may bless him with the ability to make you feel super sexy and excited by his touch and caress. Be specific and ask for what you really, really want rather than praying for things that are out of Chris’s control.”
Tess wanted to cry because Bernadette had just given her the insight she needed for her own prayers. Instead of asking God to bless her with the ability to get pregnant and bear Maceo’s child, she was going to ask him to bless her with the ability to love, nurture, and raise a child—whether that meant having her own or adopting.
After talking for another half an hour Tess said good night to her friends, took her shower, had a good-night phone call with Maceo, and was in bed by eleven o’clock. But before she drifted off to sleep, she said a prayer, and as Bernadette had instructed, she was specific about what she wanted.
Chapter 24
TESS
Arizona’s Wedding Day
Tess sat beside Maceo inside St. Mark AME Zion Church. If ever there was a beautifully decorated wedding ceremony venue, this was it. B. Vaughn Events had artfully executed Arizona’s vision of a rustic-themed indoor wedding, with pops of sophisticated and modern elements such as soft lights, tons of greenery, and tall glass cylinders with floating candles beside each pew. She had figured Arizona for a glam-theme type of bride, but this simple style fit in a great and unexpected way. The sanctuary was packed with what Tess felt was every single black per
son in the city. But she shouldn’t have been surprised at the large crowd because Arizona had been born and raised here, and the Bottoms was a tight-knit community.
Tess looked down at Maceo’s hand tightly intertwined with hers and thought about their future. Once she’d returned to Bourbon at the end of last week, it was more clear than ever how much Maceo loved her because when she’d arrived at his house he’d prepared a candlelit dinner for them, with soft music playing in the background. After they finished a delicious meal of stuffed chicken, baked sweet potatoes, and herb-flavored broccoli, they’d topped off the evening with a decadent chocolate cake and a proposal on bended knee. Tess had been shocked, happy, and tearful, but most of all, she’d been grateful.
But as much as she’d been overjoyed about her future with Maceo, she was also terrified because of the news that Dr. Gina had given her. The bottom line was that Tess needed to have a hysterectomy. Dr. Gina recommended surgery as soon as possible so Tess would have enough time to recover before her next book tour.
As she listened to the beautiful music, Tess wondered how she was going to break the news to Maceo, and once she did, how she was going to explain the fact that she’d accepted his proposal while being fully aware that she wasn’t going to be able to have children, yet said nothing to him.
She knew she had to tell him, and she would. Right after Arizona had her big day.
The Other Side Page 26
