“Smart lad,” I said, feeling a bit better about the situation. “So ye decided not to give her the ring. Where is my part in all of this?”
He shoved his fingers through his hair and grumbled. “I don’t know how to say it right, or if I can even put my thoughts into words, so give me a little slack for a minute while I try to explain.”
“I’ll not say a word,” I told him, pinching my lips.
He laughed. “I sold the ring.”
My hand fell and my mouth opened.
“Lips!” Jared warned.
I pinched my lips, unable to keep from smirking.
“I sold it because of this,” he said, picking up a small box from the floor and handing it to me.
I opened the box, and was struck speechless. There were three rings inside. A complete wedding set.
“I designed them and had them made.”
“You had these made from a drawing you did and you’re asking me for creative ideas?” I was flummoxed.
“Believe it or not, that part was easy,” he said.
“They tell a story, aye?” I asked, handing the box back.
“They do,” he said.
Before he could explain, I put my hand up. “It’s not my story to hear. Murphy should be the first. How do I come into all of this?”
“After hearing about you and Aiden, I got to thinking. How can I give her one of these rings to show her how I feel without making her think I’m pushing her for something she’s not ready for? You and Aiden hadn’t planned on getting married. You two were adamant about being happy with the way things were. And somehow, despite all of that, you still made a commitment to each other.”
“Ye’ll need more than creativity, Jared. But, aye, I’ll think on it a bit,” I said, getting up from the floor. “So when can I bring ye all my stuff to wrap?”
“Nice try,” Jared answered as he closed the box and set it on the bed.
“Worth a shot,” I said, shrugging. “If I think of anything, I’ll let ye know.”
“Thanks, Airen. I really appreciate it,” he answered. “You mind closing the door behind you so I can finish wrapping?”
Jared wanted my creativity, but I had no idea where to even begin. It wasn’t like I could tap into some sort of idea bank inside my mind. Any creative ideas I ever came up with were things that just popped into my head at random moments.
“Why are you sitting up here all by yourself?” Aiden asked.
I turned from the window and smiled. “I’ve been thinking.”
He moved over to the bed and sat. “Thinking about what?”
“Do ye ever wonder what brings two people together?”
He looked a little worried, even though he was trying not to show it, so I moved from the window and sat down next to him. He squinted. “I never really thought about it. Why?”
I gave a half shrug. “That’s what I was thinking about.”
“What made you think about that?” he asked.
“I was talking to Jared—”
“Oh, boy, this should be good,” he said with a quick laugh.
I glared. “Do ye want me to tell ye or no?”
He settled on the bed, turning so I had his full attention. “You were talking to Jared.”
“Aye. I guess he thought I might be able to come up with an idea to help him,” I said, pausing briefly as I gathered my thoughts to best explain what I thought Jared was looking for. “When he found out we’d handfasted, after us having said we’d no plans to be married…”
Aiden nodded. “No need to explain further. He’s looking for a way around marriage by finding some other form of ceremony that Murphy won’t shy away from.”
I smiled, taking his hand in mine. “Exactly. It worries me, though.”
His thumb swept against the back of my hand. “How so?”
“Who am I to come up with something that will work for them? That’s what brought me to the question of wondering what it was that brought two people together,” I answered.
“Well, all we have to base any sort of hypothesis on that is from—”
“Ace and Riley. Mark and Paige. Josh and Ella,” I said, ticking off the married couples.
“And us,” he added.
“Oh, and hypothesis? Hearing ye talk like a scientist is kinda hot, aye?” I squeaked when he yanked me into his lap and slapped me on the backside.
“Hypothesis one… Ace and Riley grew up together. Same as Mark and Paige. Both grew a relationship based on friendship before anything else,” he said.
“But that leaves out—”
“Hypothesis two… Josh and Ella, you and me. Josh and Ella went out on a mission together, which means they spent time together. Not once, but twice. Add in the danger element and the fact they were forced to play a role, along with being attracted to one another, and it was bound to turn into something. Now, for us? I lied to you. Put you in danger. Saved you from a madman, and basically turned your whole life upside down. Yet, you still fought to make me see you.”
Thinking back to that time in my life was hard. My uncle had stormed into our lives, shot and killed my mother, and kidnapped me. Aiden had been the only safe haven I’d known, but it was so much more than that. “We had chemistry.”
“Now who’s talking like a scientist?” he asked, clamping his hand on my hip.
“Don’t distract me now. Christ, I’ll never get this worked out and be of any help to Jared,” I said.
It was the wrong thing to say to Aiden. Before I knew it, he had me undressed and my thoughts scattered as if I’d dumped them from my head and tossed them out the window.
I sighed as I curled against his side and draped my leg over his.
“I think what it comes down to…” Aiden said, tucking one arm under his head and curling the other one around me. He brushed the tips of his fingers up and down my arm. “Is love, trust, and a willingness to make one another happy. To be selfish in your wants when it comes to loving someone who doesn’t want the same things as you do is a tricky balancing act. Us deciding to change it up and invoke an old Scottish tradition was our thing. The only way they’ll work it out is if they talk about it. Maybe she’s scared. Did he ever think about that?”
I shook my head. “No, I don’t think he did.”
“Do you want me to talk to him about it, instead of you trying to come up with something that just might do more harm than good?” he asked, kissing the top of my head.
I snuggled closer. “It might be best if ye do. Ye know, for a tough guy, yer pretty in tune with people’s feelings.”
He chuckled. “Must have got that from my wife.”
I lifted my head and settled my chin on his chest. “It’s good, aye. What we have.”
“It’s more than good. It’s amazing,” he said, moving his arm out from behind his head. He put it around me, hugging me tight to him.
Chapter 9
Jared
“Jared, is there a reason the entire contents of your side of the closet is on the bed?” Murphy asked.
I stood at the foot of it, pinching my bottom lip while looking from one shirt to the other. “Would you say this will be a casual Christmas Eve, or a dressy one?” I asked.
“Casual or dressy? When did you ever care about that?” she asked, shoving one of the shirts out of the way so she could sit.
“Okay, grunge is out,” I said, grabbing the shirt and putting it away. “That leaves me with ugly sweater, casual, relaxed casual, and relaxed rocker casual.”
She laughed. “Neurotic much? It’s Christmas Eve. Wear whatever the spirit of Christmas tells you to.”
I wiggled my eyebrows at her. “A Santa hat and red bow it is. You can unwrap me later.”
She shook her head. “Whatever floats your boat.”
“You don’t mean that,” I said, challenging her.
“If I didn’t mean it, I wouldn’t have said it,” she said, lifting the sweater with a creepy-looking elf on it. “Here, put this away. It’s fr
eaking me out. Where the hell did you get that anyway?”
“Can’t remember, but it’s from one of those stores at the mall. I’ll tell you why you don’t mean it. Because I know you, Skylar Murphy. If I came downstairs dressed in just a hat and a bow, you’d freak out on my ass and rush me back up the stairs.”
“Pfft. And I know you, Jared Jackson. You’re all talk. Most of the time, you’re just fishing for a reaction,” she said as she watched me hang the sweater up.
I put my hand out, and she tossed me another one of the shirts. “We could try the matching thing. I’ll let you wear three bows, though.”
She smirked at me and said, “It would serve you right if I agreed to that.”
“But you won’t. And why? Because you don’t like to make a spectacle of yourself. And you really don’t like it when I make one of myself,” I said, smirking when her eyes squinted.
“I’m not going to argue with you,” she said, tossing me another shirt.
I hung it up, trying my hardest to keep from smiling. “Why? It’s so much fun. Plus, if we argue, we get to make up later.”
“Ass. Here,” she said, tossing another one my way.
“Yeah, but you love me anyway,” I said, closing the closet once I was done.
“You still have another shirt to put up,” she said, holding it out to me.
“Nope, that’s the one I’m going to wear,” I said, taking it from her. I leaned in and gave her a quick kiss.
She got this look on her face that was a cross between aggravation and humor. “Why?”
“Because you put things in order, even when you don’t realize you’re doing it. You started with your least favorite shirt and kept handing them to me until there was only one left,” I answered, moving over to the dresser and pulling out two pairs of jeans. I held them up for her inspection. Her finger automatically went to the pair in my right hand. “It’s so ingrained in you that you can’t help yourself.”
Her hand dropped. “Because I handed you random shirts until there was only one left? You made the final decision to wear it. You could have gone back to your closet and chose whatever you wanted. And FYI, black jeans look better with a burgundy shirt than light blue ones.”
“I could have, but I didn’t. And do you know why?” I asked, tossing the jeans on the bed before opening another drawer.
“You’re just going to say I’m wrong, so why don’t you save us the trouble and tell me?” she said, huffing.
“You’re not allowed to be grumpy on Christmas Eve, Murph,” I said, digging through my sock drawer.
“If you’d just put them away in pairs, it would be a whole lot easier to find what you’re looking for,” she grumbled.
“Do you know why?” I asked, circling back to the question.
“Because I’m a control freak,” she said. “Happy?”
“I don’t think it’s a paired thing. I think the damn washer eats my socks,” I said, lifting each up to find a matching set.
“If you just wore one kind of socks, it wouldn’t be this difficult,” Murphy said as she tapped me to move out of the way.
“I could tell you why, but I want to hear it from you. And it has nothing to do with you being a control freak, so try again,” I said, moving to lean against the side of the dresser.
“How can you find anything in here?” she asked, pulling the drawer out and then marching over to the bed. “What was the question?”
“Murph, I didn’t go back to the closet and choose what I wanted to wear, because all of my choices were already on the bed. You chose the one you liked best out of my choices, so that’s what I’m wearing,” I said.
“I thought you weren’t going to tell me,” she said, tossing a matching pair of socks to me before upending the drawer.
“I thought you said you’d never sort my socks again after the last time,” I said, smirking.
“Yeah, well, I guess neither of us can help being who we are,” she murmured.
“That’s exactly it. And you know what? I can’t think of a single person who’d put up with all of my bullshit the way you do. And I don’t mind your quirks because they make you who you are.”
She lifted the drawer and handed it over to me. “Here, do something useful. Is there a point to all of this, besides pointing out our flaws?”
“Just that I love you,” I said, sliding the drawer in as Murphy wandered into the bathroom.
“I love you, too. Even when you make me angry enough to spit nails,” she said. She closed the bathroom door.
“Hey, you got a second?” Aiden asked, poking his head into the room. “Or is it a bad time?”
The sound of the shower coming on had me internally growling at Aiden’s crap timing. I looked to him, and then made it a point to look at the bathroom door. Give him the are you kidding me right now look, I said, “It better be important.”
“Grab your jacket,” Aiden replied.
“We could have talked inside where it was warm,” I said, shoving my hands deep into my pockets with a shiver.
“You could start a fire if you’re that cold,” he tossed back at me.
“So could you.” I moved to the pile of wood. Even a small fire would at least chase off some of the chill.
“You haul the wood, and I’ll get it rollin’,” Aiden said, slipping into his heavy southern drawl.
“Huh,” I marveled, dropping an arm full of logs by his feet.
“What?” He didn’t bother to look up at me as he stacked the logs.
“Have you noticed that we all have lost a bit of our accents since we’ve been in Chicago?” I asked.
“Can’t say as I have,” he replied.
“I didn’t notice it until just now, but we have. Weird.” I handed him another log, and then stepped back when he added a little bit of lighter fluid before pulling a book of matches from his pocket.
I crumpled a piece of old newspaper and tucked it under the logs.
“Planned this, did you?” I asked.
“Boy Scout rule number one… always be prepared,” he said, striking the match and setting it against the edge of the paper.
“Does this preparedness come with a reason why you pulled me out of the house to talk?” I asked.
“I didn’t pull you anywhere. I asked you. Big difference. And yes, I have a reason. Pull up a chair, Jackson, you aren’t gonna get any taller,” he said as he sat.
“Hand me the poker,” I said, moving an empty chair closer to the fire.
Aiden smirked. “Nope. My fire. I get the poker.”
“Dick. So why am I out here?” I asked.
“Airen told me that you talked to her,” he said, gauging me with a look to see how I’d take that bit of news.
I leaned forward, rubbed my hands together, and then held them out to the fire. “Were you expecting me to get mad?”
“Honestly, I wasn’t sure what your reaction would be,” he answered, laying the poker on his knees and then leaning his arms on it.
My fingers itched to grab it from him. Firebug that I was, I couldn’t leave a fire alone once it was burning. “I tell Murphy everything, so it’s not like I can get mad at Airen for talking to you.”
Aiden blew out a breath and hunched his shoulders. “I’m not good at this whole relationship thing, Jared. What I do know is that every one of them are different. It bothered you to find out that me and Airen made a commitment to one another that worked for us. But what I don’t think you fully understand is that it worked for us because neither of us were expecting more from one another. There may never be wedding bells in our future, and we’re okay with that. Hell, it might even come down to the one year and one day, and we make that same vow to each other all over again. And just continue to do that for the rest of our lives. But it works for us.”
I slouched back in my seat, arms crossed tight as I considered what he said.
“Ask yourself this, why would she say no? She’s put up with you for quite some time. You live in each ot
her’s pockets almost every second of every day. What reason would she have to balk at marriage? Once you really think about it, then maybe it will make more sense to you. Maybe she’s never wanted marriage. Maybe she sees no point in it. I mean, stop and really think about it. What is marriage, or the glorified version of it?”
“A piece of paper, or, for some, a title,” I answered. “Trust me, Aiden, I’ve thought about it all. In fact, it’s pretty much all I think about these days. I don’t want to push her, but damn. Do you know what a kick in the gut it is to love someone so much that all you want to do is prove to them they are everything to you, but they say no? I know she loves me. I know that, and yet I still…”
“You still want something she’s not able to give you. I get it,” he said.
“No, you don’t. You might think you do, but you don’t. You and Airen found a way to show your commitment to one another without having to do something you had no intention of doing. You’ve made a pledge to one another. If I’m being honest, it might even be stronger than any marriage vow. The point is that it isn’t just about standing up in front of our friends and family to announce our intentions, to join our lives in the presence of them and God. It’s about telling one another that there are no more steps. That we’ve given all that we are to one another in every sense of the word,” I said, feeling the threat of heavy emotion sweep over me.
Was it too much to want to show the person I loved that I’ve given her every part of myself? And how could I explain the feeling of it without sounding like I wanted some kind of claim on Murphy? Making someone understand how I felt was almost impossible.
Aiden sighed and pushed up from his seat. The fire poker hit the side of my leg. His hand came down on my shoulder. “Maybe you taking the first step is the best thing. Don’t expect anything from her. Hell, don’t even ask her. Just show her what you mean if you can’t find the way to tell her. Out of everything you said, I understand what you mean about giving everything you are to one another. So ask yourself what it is you can do that shows her how you feel, and then let her be the one to decide what to do with it. She loves you, Jared. Really, a man can’t get any luckier when he has the heart and soul of his own heart and soul.”
A Very Merry Sixmas Page 9
