by CJ Azevedo
“Hey doll, I’ve been looking for you. Who is this?” Doll? I raise my eyes at Talon with a hint of a smile on my lips. Talon stifles a laugh at my look, knowing the silent words of it were… “Doll? Really Talon?”
I don’t hear any hostility from her but I still don’t her acting like she belongs to him more than I do. What am I thinking? She does belong to him more than me!
“Susan, this is Bailey Hayes. Bailey, this is Susan Davidson, she is Hunter’s cousin. Susan is visiting from Texas.” Ok so it doesn’t sound like she is an official date, but she is kind of sizing me up like she is. Time to jump into socialite mode.
“Pleased to meet you Susan, I hope you are enjoying New York. Is this your first time in the city?”
“Likewise, and no. It is my first time as an adult, but I used to come here often as a kid.” I keep smiling like this isn’t killing me watching Talon move his hand and focus to Susan. But I don’t have much time to dwell on it because I feel Hollister’s hand slip around my waist and his lips touch the side of my head for just a brief second.
“Mr. McAllister.” Hollister shakes Talon’s hand and my heart is pounding out of my chest. I may be sweating, I’m not sure though. “I just met your sister out in the hall; I trust my girlfriend introduced herself?” I can tell Talon hates Hollister’s choice of words, just as I do, but I’m used to it, Talon clearly is not.
“Hollister Harrison, right? Yes, I’ve met Bailey; this is Susan Davidson, a close friend of mine.” I’m confident Hollister has never cheated on me, but a beautiful woman in a revealing dress standing right in front of him will not be dismissed without a thorough perusal. This also pisses off Talon. “Hollister,” Talon says sternly, dragging Hollister’s attention away from Susan. “Thank you for joining us this evening, please enjoy yourselves.” Talon nods in my direction trying not to make it obvious that he knew me prior to Hollister’s introduction before gently guiding Susan away from us.
“Have you gotten our drinks yet?”
His words drag me out of my longing for the man who just walked away from me. “Um, yeah. They’re right here.” I turn around to grab our drinks. Apparently, I forgot to turn my ringer off because my text alert goes off and I fear it is Talon. Ok, so maybe fear isn’t exactly what I am feeling, but I definitely need to hide it from Hollister just in case. So I shrug out of his embrace and pull my phone from my clutch while Hollister takes a drink. I slide my phone out just enough to be able to see that it is Kali.
Hey! Just wanted to say hello, I miss you!
This makes my heart soar. I miss her friendship terribly and wish things could be different, yet again. But they’re not, so I’ll just have to continue to keep her a secret from my boyfriend.
I look around to see Kali at the far end of the room with a big grin on her face blowing me a kiss. Oh, I really miss her. Thankfully Hollister has his back turned to her and can’t see.
“What are you doing?” Hollister asks, startling me.
“Oh nothing, I just got a message from Shy and I guess I just checked out for a minute.” I take a long drink from my glass and start to change the subject when my phone chimes again.
“Please turn that off Bailey. It’s rude.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry.” I look down at my phone to check it underneath the bar so he can’t see before turning it off, only this time it isn’t Kali.
Please meet me in the lobby in 10 mins.
Talon wants me to meet him in the lobby of a hotel with my boyfriend under the same roof. This is a terrible idea. I should tell him that it’s not possible and just turn off my phone.
I turn my phone on silent and stuff it back in the clutch. I take another few drinks and continue to pass time in silence. “I’ll be right back. I just need to visit the ladies’ room real quick.” Or maybe I’ll tell my boyfriend that instead of doing the proper thing and staying put.
“That’s fine, I see a couple I know just over there, so come find me when you get back.” He points in the general direction where he’ll be as he walks off.
Quickly, I walk away from the bar and head towards the lobby, full of excitement to be alone with Talon, even if it is just for a couple of minutes.
Pushing through the doors I see Talon standing right in front of me, with his back against the wall, his right leg hitched up underneath him and his arms folded over his chest. Apparently he decided the lobby wasn’t necessary. I instantly feel bummed out, I guess I was kind of hoping that he was wanting or needing to be somewhat affectionate, the same way I am feeling.
I smile and the second the door closes behind me he pushes off from the wall and wraps me in his arms. A sigh of relief escapes me as he holds me for just a minute before pulling back and grabbing my hand. “Come with me for a minute.” It isn’t exactly a question but I can tell he isn’t sure if I will go. He doesn’t realize that I would follow him to the end of the earth if he asked tonight.
I nod and smile, feeling overwhelmed with so many emotions. We walk briskly down the hall and stop at a single door on the left side of the hall. The hall is empty when he opens it and pulls me inside. The door shuts and I realize that we are in a stairwell, completely alone.
Talon pulls me into his body and wraps both arms around my waist. He looks and smells exactly like he did the last time I saw him, only this time he’s in a black tux and skinny tie looking absolutely delicious. Who am I kidding? He looks amazing in anything at any time of the day.
“I hate him Bailey.” He looks almost pained as he bores his gaze into my eyes.
That’s not exactly what I was expecting to come out of his mouth, although it’s probably what I should have been expecting. I know how big his heart his and that seeing more marks on my skin would only crush him. Of course he’s going to be angry. “I know, I’m so sorry; I shouldn’t have come.” I don’t know what else to tell him. I am already on overload with feelings and emotions I would rather not be experiencing. Seeing him alone is throwing a wrench in my loyalty and commitment to Hollister, but seeing him in this distress is killing me. I want to rub away the furrowed brow and caress his cheek and make all of his pain dissipate.
“Bailey, that’s not what I mean and you know that. He deserves ten times worse than he’s done to you and I don’t know how to go about that without hurting you in the process.” He takes a deep breath and moves his hands to gently run his fingers over the red marks around my neck. If my heart was breaking before, well, now it’s destroyed.
His hands make their way up to cup my face and he kisses the side of my mouth, not quite on my lips and definitely leaving me wanting more from him. His forehead meets mine and he closes his eyes, steadying his breathing. “Choose me Bailey. Please, just walk out with me right now, don’t go with him. I will do anything and everything to be worthy of you. I know I can make you happy and protect you every day, forever Bailey. Please choose me and be mine.”
The tears I feared would run have done exactly that. They are streaming down my face and I cannot stop them. My life is so complicated and he doesn’t deserve that. He has it so wrong when he says he’ll do anything to be worthy of me, it’s me who is not worthy of him. I can’t bring him into this mess of a life that I’m living.
“I’m so sorry Talon, I can’t do that. Not right now. I know what you’re thinking, but tonight is the first time he has put his hands on me since I came home from your place. I’m not saying that makes it ok, it just means that I haven’t had a second alone to figure out how to move on and how to leave him. To know that this is my final straw or decide how deep my loyalty to him should be. This literally just happened, and knowing that he’s worked so hard to make the last time up to me and that he’s trying so hard to change himself, I’m just not sure right now.”
“So what is he going to have to do to prove to you that he is a selfish out of control bastard who doesn’t even deserve to know you , let alone be able to call you his? I don’t care what his history is, or what he’s doing to prove he�
��s sorry. There never should have been something like this for him to apologize for in the first place!” He takes a deep breath. He starts pacing in the small area at the bottom of the stairwell while speaking. He stops and rests his hands on his hips before continuing in a much calmer manner. “I don’t know what to do Bay. It’s killing me to sit back and watch this happen to you, what do you suggest I do?” I can tell he’s exasperated and lost. I hate it. I just want to make him happy but I can’t figure out how to do that and protect him at the same time.
“I’m not sure I have a suggestion to make this better for you. I just know that what I’m going through is because this is the path I chose many months ago when I moved in with him. It wouldn’t be fair to you for me to involve you in any way. You don’t deserve this Talon. Take the path opposite me, the one where you can find love and happiness without it being tainted by my life.” I can’t even believe these words are coming out of my mouth. I just told the world’s most perfect man to walk away from me. I must have lost. My. Mind.
The kiss he places on my lips will be seared into my brain for the rest of my entire life. It’s nothing sexy. It is sweet and meaningful and full of his passion. Talon holds me tight against him for just a minute before stepping away and opening the door. He pauses and turns back to me. “You know how to find me if you ever need me.” He lowers his eyes and his voice before he continues, “Bye, Bailey.” Then the door closes and I’m left by myself to figure out my life and how I’m supposed to spend the rest of it without Talon.
****
I’ve been standing at the bar alone for the last twenty minutes. When I came back into the banquet room, I found Hollister right where he said he would be. I started to walk towards him, when he looked up at me. I smiled and he looked away. So I went to the bar and am now on my second drink and he has not made his way to me. A lot has crossed my mind two drinks and twenty minutes later.
I’m actually shocked I haven’t broken out in a full on panic attack yet. The more I think about the man I just let walk out of my life and then the man who couldn’t care less that I have been at a bar alone for so long, the more I start to question everything in my life.
I have been so devoted to staying with Hollister to try and make up for my knee-jerk reaction of moving across the country all those years ago that I actually sacrificed my own well-being. I have been so certain that I owe it to him and our relationship to support him and allow him time to prove to me that his abusing me, in any way, will never happen again. I am very wrong. I should have realized as soon as I moved in with him and everything changed that who I had before was not the real Hollister. The real Hollister can’t control his temper. The real Hollister allows his anger and frustration to consume him, and allows himself to react and to hurt me emotionally and physically.
As badly as I want to, I still can’t run across the room and ask Talon to forgive me for turning him down in the stairwell. I need to figure out how this is going to go down with Hollister first. I know it’s not going to go as easily as breaking up with him and moving out. No, it’s going to be a much bigger deal and I can’t allow Talon to be a part of that. This is something that I’m going to have to face on my own. Then hopefully, not too far down the road, my and Talon’s paths will cross again. I hope.
Deciding that I need to make my move before I back out, I grab my phone to make sure Drea is home. She is my only chance of not living out of a hotel for a while if I’m going to do this.
You home? ~ Bay
I polish off my drink and she responds immediately.
Yup! ~ Drea
Can I come crash at your place? ~Bay
Yes! Oh God, are you finally leaving him? ~Drea
Yup! Be there in a few. ~Bay
You okay? ~Drea
Yeah, I’ll explain when I get there. ~Bay
I shove my phone back in my clutch and make a quick decision to let him know that I’m leaving. I know I don’t owe him anything, but I do need to make this break as clean as possible so it doesn’t get too ugly.
As nervous as I can possibly be, I walk over towards Hollister on wobbly legs. It’s not that I believe he’s going to see through me and make a scene in front of all these people, but I am making a move to the beginning of the end and it scares and excites the crap out of me. On top of that, I am three drinks in and I need to get out of here before I embarrass myself.
Hollister is standing in a semi-circle with a few other guys. He’s facing toward me and makes eye contact for just a second then turns his attention back toward the man speaking. I was once a hopeless romantic, not anymore, but even still one would think their boyfriend would be excited about them walking up and claiming him as their own. Nope, not in this relationship apparently.
As I walk up to Hollister, he takes a quick glance at me but doesn’t move an inch. I begin to wonder if he knows I met with Talon in private, or if someone mentioned to him about Talon being somewhat affectionate over at the bar before he arrived.
A couple of the men greet me, pulling me out of my own head and back into the present.
“I apologize for interrupting gentlemen, if you don’t mind I need to speak with Hollister for just a moment.” They are all very kind and give me the go ahead by nodding their heads but not without taking in the deep red markings in the shape of fingers around my throat and on my arm. Then it hits me as to why Hollister hadn’t wanted me over here. It wasn’t because he suspected anything with Talon. No, he didn’t want any attention brought to my bruises.
Hollister puts his arm around my waist and steers me away from the other men. When we’re off to the side of the room somewhat alone, he steps closer and places his hand on my face. He gently rubs my jawline with his thumb and kisses my forehead.
My stomach lurches and it is then that I know without a shadow of a doubt that I need to leave him right now and not look back. I know that I have made the best possible decision and I will not have any regrets. I breathe deeply trying to steady myself and make myself sound convincing enough to make it out of here without him insisting on following me out.
“I’m really not feeling well Hollister. I just need to go; I’ll call a cab though so you can stay.”
“Are you ok?” That surprises me somewhat. I mean, he’s not always rude and careless but I really didn’t expect it tonight.
“I will be. I just need to go and get some rest. You stay and have a good time.”
“Are we going to be ok?” I really wasn’t expecting that. He’s asking me with such uncertainty. I have already made up my mind, but how do I answer that? Maybe I should just be half truthful.
“I don’t know Hollister, but now is not the time to discuss this. I need to leave, but I need you to stay. Can you please do that for me?” He looks at me with a face of confusion. He’s processing what I have just said and now a look of concern is crossing over his eyes.
I don’t mean to, but my attention is being pulled to an area behind Hollister. Once I get the courage to take a look I see Talon. He’s standing there watching us, although I can’t decide if he’s looking more angry or hurt. Possibly both. Just seeing him at this particular point pushes me further into my decision to leave Hollister.
“You’re leaving me, aren’t you? I can see it all over your face. Please, don’t do this. Not here, not now.” He’s whispering and pleading close to my ear as he holds me tight. I try to pull back but he just holds tighter.
I can still see Talon watching and now he just looks pissed. From all the way across the room I can see him working that chiseled jaw of his back and forth. He has run his hand through his perfectly styled hair and a little strand has fallen down onto his forehead. I so desperately want to go to him and push that lock of hair back out of his face. Instead, I offer him a small smile and then get back to business with Hollister.
“I just need to leave here. We can discuss this later.” I pull back again and this time he allows it to happen.
“No, I’ll come with you and we’ll
work it out. I’m so sorry, Bay. Please don’t give up on me.” This is what made me stay last time, and now that will be my main mantra. This is what made me stay last time, this is what made me stay last time, this is what made me stay last time.
“Not now Hollister, I’m leaving. Stay and do whatever it was that was so important you had to force me to come. Good bye.” Without another word or look I walk out into the lobby as I call a cab and head to Drea’s place.
CHAPTER TWENTY SIX
TALON
I knew taking Susan to the dinner wasn’t going to satisfy my need to have Bailey in my life, but I was hoping it would at least appease it some. However, introducing Susan to Bailey was what I would imagine being in a guillotine would be like. You know it’s about to go horribly wrong, deadly wrong, but there’s not a damn thing you can do about it. You sit there and watch it unfold before you. Both women were very nice and friendly to one another. Although Susan has been very vocal about her feelings towards Bailey ever since we somewhat discussed the relationship, or lack thereof, between Bailey and I, she still revealed very little in front of her. It didn’t seem to me that Bailey was too happy to see that I had a date, but then again that could have just been my wishful thinking kicking in.
I notice that Bailey leaves before Hollister, but I don’t bother calling her. It’s all I can think of doing, but I have Susan with me and she really is a nice girl. She is easy to talk to and pleasant enough to spend time with when I need to take my mind off work, the other option being obsessing over Bailey. Not a good idea.
I will just wait for Bailey to come to me. I don’t know what she and Hollister were saying before she left him standing there looking defeated but I pleaded my case to Bailey and she denied me. Again. So as much as I want to go after her I won’t.
CHAPTER TWENTY SEVEN
BAILEY
