by KC Klein
Now the ice in his eyes hardened his features, and she wondered if the warmth had ever been real.
The three of them stood, in silence, waiting.
It was Thomas, raised in a world of old money and even older traditions, who finally stepped up.
He walked over to Cole and extended his hand.
For one long, awkward moment Katie thought Cole would refuse the handshake. Then, to her relief, he grasped it.
“I’m Thomas. Katie’s told me a lot about you.”
Cole narrowed his eyes. And she saw him take in Thomas’s expensive watch, quality clothes, and the smell of old money. He almost sneered at Thomas’s leather loafers, already covered with horse crap.
Then Cole looked across the yard to where Katie was standing. Like two people frozen in a photograph, their gazes held. Cole didn’t speak. He didn’t have to. Katie knew what he was waiting for. He was giving her the opportunity to come clean, to tell Thomas. Acknowledge their marriage. And yet, she couldn’t form the words.
Instead, she cut her glance to Cole’s truck, and in the light of day the truth was unkind.
Large brown leaves rustled along the driveway, and one was pinned flat against the windshield, smack in the middle of a distinct impression of bat to glass. The plastic pieces from the headlights showed up yellow and white among the rocks and dirt.
“Yeah, I noticed your truck,” Thomas said, a hint of smile in his voice. He walked over to take a closer look, but stopped and leaned against the shiny red hood of the sports car. “Looks like someone took a bat to it.”
Well, thanks, Thomas. Way to state the obvious. But maybe the obvious was what she needed to hear. She looked back to Cole. His gaze had never left her face. What had he always told her? Look before you leap, Katie. Don’t lead with your heart. Use your head. Quit rushing headlong into the fire. Maybe Cole was right, things burned. And she was tired of getting hurt.
Cole stood in silence a long time after Katie and her lapdog of a fiancé left. The sun hadn’t been up long enough to warm the wood beneath his bare feet, but he wasn’t cold—inside an inferno raged.
Raw heat pumped through his veins. The muscles in his shoulders ached. His jaw hurt from constant clenching. He tried to relax, but found his body unwilling.
Move. Pack up your crap. Leave.
He wanted to. Wanted to jump in his truck and leave the ranch, his house, everything behind. And yet, when he looked at his truck, he realized even that choice had been taken from him.
So he didn’t move, just stood there. Took in the hardness of the lemon sky, sucked bitter air through clenched teeth, and watched a bird crap on his truck.
Nikki came out, and for a while stood beside him. She didn’t speak, just added her presence in a show of support.
Breathe in. Breathe out. Let your heart beat. Uncurl your fists.
Sometime later he stood alone again. Alone was better. Everything was better. He just needed to be still a bit longer. Be still and figure out how to keep from setting everything around him on fire.
Chapter 26
Nikki’s lungs burned, and her legs felt stiff as she pushed herself up the hill. The mornings were still cold, but the afternoons were warm enough that the back of her neck prickled with sweat. Her new shoes felt good as she ran up the dusty dirt road. She was surprised Cole had known her size, surprised that he had gotten them as a gift for her.
She’d never seen Cole so low. Not even after Katie had left the first time. But she was proud of him. No matter how much pain he was in, and he was in a lot, he didn’t seem to want to go back down into the black pit of despair. He’d gotten himself out once; he wouldn’t fall that low again.
Cole had found her in her room late last night, his face drawn and tired, but there was a smile when he had handed her a shopping bag. “I know I was supposed to be a mother and father to you all rolled into one, but really, I’d never even gotten the big brother thing down.”
She had tried to stop him. She had enough guilt of her own; in her eyes Cole had done the best he could.
He shook his head. “No, let me say this. I’ve never been there for you. I provided the best I could physically, but really fell short when you needed me emotionally. And I know we’ve never been real good at the gift thing, but you need this.”
She opened the shopping bag and pulled out a large shoe box. She recognized the brand name printed across the top. She hadn’t run since high school, since the days of being on the track team, since the long nights of taking care of her mother. Looking back, she realized running had kept her sane, had given her an outlet she needed. She’d stopped running after her mother died, almost like a self-inflicted punishment. A penance for not being the daughter her mother deserved.
But apparently, Cole thought she needed to take up her passion again. “I’m not sure what I think about you and Jett, but I do know if you’re gonna dance with his family, you’ll need to hit the ground running.”
She knew he was right; she just didn’t know if she had what it would take. “You don’t think I can hold my own, do you?”
“Sunshine,” he said, using the childhood nickname he’d had for her. “That’s not what I’m worried about. You’re the most courageous woman I’ve ever known. You’ve stared down fears that would make a grown man quake in his boots. But we’re Logans, and I guess our heritage has always been to sell ourselves short. Mom never thought she was good enough, but you’re better than her. The Logans are a hard bunch to love, but if someone is willing to try, you have to give it a shot.”
“I want to try, Cole. Try and do better. Make something of myself that would’ve made Mom proud. Make you proud.”
He had hugged her then, one of those rare brother-sister hugs, and at that moment she hated Katie more than ever before. Her brother was a good man who loved Katie to distraction, and if she couldn’t see that then Cole was better off without her.
Cole had told her that he was selling the ranch; with the money he would have after paying off his debts, he wanted to help get her on her feet. She couldn’t take his money, though. The ranch had been his. Nikki had no stake in it. But the selling of her childhood home was a different matter. She still wasn’t sure what she felt—part sadness, part relief. Regardless, the ties that had bound her to this town were breaking free.
For the first time in what felt like forever, Nikki had options.
In her mind, running and freedom were forever linked, so it was natural for her to try out her shoes, pound the dirt road. The sun shone down warm like a lover, making sweat form between her breasts and trail down her stomach. She pulled the brim of her baseball hat lower. There was pain—in her legs, in her lungs—but the good kind, the kind she could handle. She had missed this—the solitude of running, the span of time when she had the power to shush her demons, when the music pounding in her ears gave wings to the thoughts in her head.
The first mile was always the hardest, it took that long for her body to find its rhythm. But she was in mile three now, and there was plenty of time and space to work through the words that Jett had spoken to her. Could she be with Jett? Could she be happy? She broke things, made good things go bad. That’s what she did. That’s what the people in this town thought she did. Was she willing to hold her head high, let people say what they wanted, and grab at her chance of a happily-ever-after?
She quickened her pace, her feet feeling lighter than she’d ever remembered. The endorphins drugging her blood were a good thing, or maybe deciding to fight for what she wanted brought its own euphoria with it.
Nikki felt a presence at her back. Turning, she watched a sleek, white Mercedes pull up alongside her. The gold chrome tires reflected the sun, and Nikki was glad she had her darkest glasses on. There was an electric hum as the tinted driver’s-side window lowered; her heart followed suit, making its way to the bottom of her stomach. A middle-aged woman with dark glasses, platinum hair, and a forehead too unlined to be natural gave Nikki a cool smile.
&n
bsp; Nikki had never been deemed important enough to rate a visit from the Queen. Sure, the Queen had shown up at her father’s funeral and her mother’s, along with the biggest flower arrangement seen in two counties, but Nikki had never been the subject of her undivided attention. Wasn’t sure she liked it now.
“Hello, Mrs. Avery.”
“Hello, Nikki.”
A gust of AC slipped out the window, ruffling Mrs. Avery’s perfect long pageboy cut. Mrs. Avery was cool, calm, and sitting behind the wheel of a seventy thousand dollar machine, while Nikki was hunched over and sweating in the sun. Mrs. Avery couldn’t have done better if she’d planned this—maybe she had.
“I got a call from Jett this morning.” Her voice had a crisp carrying quality to it, perfect for charity luncheons and women’s issue panels. Nikki wondered which category she fell into. “He called to tell me he had invited you over for Sunday dinner.”
Nikki was glad she always ran on an empty stomach; at least she wouldn’t be disgracing herself by splattering her breakfast all over those shiny chrome rims.
“As you know, Jett is my only son, my baby. As a mother, I only want the best for him. He has a bright future in front of him—the family business, social reforms, and with the right woman, a seat in the Senate.”
Nikki was glad her glasses were dark; her right eye had started to twitch.
“Jett has always been a generous soul, maybe too kind for his own good. And I’ll admit I never did understand what he saw in Cole for all those years. But I suppose voters are made up of common men, so it’s good to keep a pulse on issues close to their hearts. But dating them, well . . .” She trailed off as if the thought had robbed her of her voice.
Nikki understood completely. She wanted to say something, defend herself. There was no way this conversation could go anywhere but brutal. But she was frozen, a hole where her heart had been. This woman so outranked her, intimidated Nikki on levels she hadn’t even known existed.
“I’ve known women like you all my life. I wasn’t born into money. I’ve made myself into who I am today, so I know how women like you think. You think you’re going to get your dirty, ragged nails into my son. You think he’s your meal ticket out of this dusty two-bit town. But my son is smarter than that. He’ll see through you before you get him to the altar. And when your little illicit affair is over, you’ll end up with nothing—no wedding, no husband, no payday.”
Mrs. Avery pushed her glasses up on top of her head. Her brown eyes were a shock to Nikki, being so close to the warm gaze of Jett’s. “I like you, Nikki. I feel for what you’ve been through. And no one can help what they’re born into. So I’m here to give you a hand.”
She reached over and picked up a white envelope on the passenger seat. She passed it out through the window and thrust it into Nikki’s face. “Take it. No, don’t bother with silly moral dilemmas. I’m not someone you need to impress. I’ve lived in the real world and know exactly what it takes to get out.”
Nikki just stood there—her shiny sugarcoated dream dissolving under the hot Texas sun.
“Take it. This is your last chance. I won’t offer again.”
Nikki watched her hand reach over. Her fingers grasped the envelope. Funny how opportunity could feel thick and heavy like a cream embossed envelope, and at the same time slick and dirty like the apple given to Eve.
Chapter 27
“I’ve been looking for you,” Thomas said as he walked up behind Katie where she stood, looking out over the Logans’ ranch. “I went to your house, but you weren’t there.”
Katie nodded. She hadn’t been surprised at Thomas’s approach. His footsteps could be heard a whole ranch away.
“I like to walk here in the mornings. It’s so peaceful before the day starts. It reminds me of why I love this place so much.” She didn’t feel much like talking. She’d brought Pa home from the hospital yesterday and needed these few moments to herself before the endless tasks of caretaking began.
“Well, it is quiet,” Thomas agreed, rubbing his bare hands together, slightly reddened from the cold.
They were silent for a moment, taking in the flat expanse of the yellowing grass and the twisted naked limbs of the cypress trees. In the distance, wooden posts stood single file with barbed wire strung between like obedient soldiers heading into battle. Katie remembered how Cole used to work at stringing fence line on other ranches just to pay the bills. She wondered how much this fence had cost Cole, not only in money, but in his own sweat and blood.
“You’re different here than in New York. Less anxious, more . . . sure,” Thomas said, sounding a bit disappointed.
Katie nodded again, not knowing what Thomas wanted her to say. This had been her home forever. The place where she’d learned to ride, to kiss, learned about sorrow and joy. This was where she’d grown up. This ranch was part of her.
Out of nowhere, Thomas grinned. His smiles were so free and quick. She never had to work hard to get him to laugh. But then, Thomas hadn’t had to work hard at anything in his life.
He looked down and shuffled his leather shoes in the fine dust. Irritation sparked that he still wore such impractical shoes, but maybe that was unfair. He probably hadn’t packed boots or maybe didn’t even own a pair.
“I’ve been thinking, Katie, about us, about your father. I realize that you need to stay here. He’s your only family. But you’re my family, too. I want to make you happy.”
Katie’s head ached. She longed for the quiet moments before his arrival. “Thomas, I can’t right now.”
He continued as if he hadn’t heard her. “I’m saying . . . what I want to do is . . . what would you think if I bought this place? It could be me and you. You could take care of the horses, and I would do the business side. I know this is your dream. Let’s do it together, build a business, build a life.”
He stepped closer and took her hand, the gesture a bit awkward. The gray of his eyes was a shade lighter with unshed tears. “I know I’ve made mistakes. Hell, we both have, but I don’t want to lose you.”
Katie shook her head and latched onto the only thing she could think of right now. “Cole would never sell. This ranch was built on his father’s back. He’d never walk away.”
Thomas smiled. “It was Cole’s idea. He seemed grateful that I was willing to take the ranch off his hands. I got the place for a steal.”
A pain cut to her bone, and she lost her breath. “He sold?”
She couldn’t think of the ranch without Cole. Would it still be the same place she’d grown up on if Cole weren’t here?
“Pretty easily.” Thomas nodded and stroked her fingers. “His only condition was that the deed be put solely in your name. A bit unorthodox, but when we marry, it won’t really matter.”
And just like that, Cole was willing to give up his family’s legacy? After all he’d done to make the ranch a success, he was going to walk away? Not even put up a fight?
Katie pulled her hands out of Thomas’s grip. She didn’t want to be touched. She rubbed her arms, suddenly cold. Emotions stormed inside her, but she couldn’t justify any of them. This was it then. Their sham of a marriage was finally over. What had she expected?
But something gnawed at her. Had the ranch meant as much to Cole as she’d thought, or was she just seeing things from her own perspective? If his dad hadn’t died and left the family business to him, what would Cole have chosen to do? It scared her that she’d never thought to ask before.
As Katie’s mind raced, she turned and began to make her way to the fence line that bordered the pasture.
“I have so many ideas for the ranch, Katie.” Thomas fell in step beside her. “I figure we really need to get the breeding program reorganized. Cole has done some, but I know I can find a way to make things more productive. We’ll save a ton on vet bills after you graduate, which we can use to buy a stud.”
Katie nodded, more to keep him quiet than in agreement. Panic began to build in her chest, and she used her hand to try to
ease the tightness.
“Of course, we wouldn’t offer any riding lessons. There’s no money in that.”
“What about rehabilitation?” Katie couldn’t believe she’d said that. It wasn’t something she’d been thinking about. Or had she? What exactly had she had in mind when she pictured herself living and working here?
“For who? Horses? There’s no money in that either, Katie,” he chuckled softly. “Leave the finances to me. You just do what you love and take care of the horses. We’ll make a great team.”
Katie turned her back on him, not willing to listen any more. Out of habit she searched the horizon for Sweet Thing.
In the distance she saw a red splotch against the cotton batting of the Texas sky. The tension in her shoulders eased. She smiled, then puckered her lips for a low whistle. Thomas kept chattering beside her, but she ignored him and leaned forward against the fence. She whistled again. “Do you have an apple?”
“What? No. Why would I have an apple?”
Katie shrugged one shoulder in dismissal. In the distance the red smudge became clearer. Katie held her breath and watched the roan mare and her foal come closer. Behind her she heard Thomas stomping his feet as if chilled.
“Come on, Katie. We can talk this over inside. I forgot my jacket.”
“Shh—” she cut him off. “Don’t move.” Katie moistened her lips, then whistled low and loud, her heart pounding in her chest.
