by David Burke
“Uh, well I…”
“You weren’t thinking. Yeah, I know. You don’t have to say it. I mean for a while there I had started to think that you were better than 99.9% of your gender but then you go and prove me wrong,” Amelia said.
“I’m sorry,” Jay mumbled as he shrugged, although whether the shrug was for her or himself was anyone’s guess.
“That’s all you can say? ‘I’m sorry.’ Then you do that damn shrug. So what are you sorry for? Sorry for abandoning us? Sorry for trying to fight an army of monsters by yourself? Sorry for almost getting killed and leaving us alone again?” Amelia stared at him intently while she fired her questions at him.
She pounded her finger into his chest hard enough that he was sure if he hadn’t developed a hardened body he would have been bruised. He could see she was angry, but he also saw beneath it. Her concern was there. This was just how Amelia expressed it. She was right though. He did owe her more than an apology.
Still she wouldn’t let him get in a word edge-wise. She kept berating him. Huong started to tell her to back off. She warned that he might still need to regain his strength, but Amelia ignored her after barking out, “Even a slut like you doesn’t deserve to be treated like this.”
Jay had enough of it though. He reached out and grabbed the elbow of the arm that was poking him. Pulling hard enough that she couldn’t resist he tugged her down against himself till her breasts pressed against his chest and he pressed his lips to her mouth.
Then he released her, but she continued to lie there. So he said, “Sorry but you wouldn’t let me apologize. I am truly sorry and if you let me get you something to eat, then I will tell you in detail everything that I am sorry for.”
She looked down at him and he was lost for a second in her beautiful blue eyes. They were the color of the sky on a brilliant, spring morning. Her full lips quivered for a moment as indecision danced across her face. She leaned in pressing herself against him and kissing him. This time with an open mouth.
No sooner had she begun to shiver with the kiss than she pulled away and sat upright on the edge of the bed. “Oh no, don’t you think just cause you're so dreamy that you can get out of this that easy. You promised to be there for us. You swore that we were a team. You were always gonna have my back. That’s what you said. Isn’t it?” Amelia stood up and walked out of the door.
Huong called out, “Wait, you shouldn’t go out yet. The sun hasn’t come up yet.”
She stood up to chase after Amelia but Meikiyo stepped in front of her. “If anyone will be okay out there, it’s her. She can hide in plain daylight.”
“We don’t know what senses those creatures have. For all we know they can see right through her shroud,” Huong protested.
“Didn’t look that way earlier. She snuck right up on that one that she stabbed through its skull.”
Huong hung her head and walked over to the other bed and lay down curling up. Meikiyo walked over to her and massaged her back. She leaned over and whispered something that Jay couldn’t hear.
He watched them and was glad that they had each other but he couldn’t stand to see any of his team in danger. Amelia shouldn’t be outside alone at night, not with this new danger that they didn’t understand yet. So he stood up and grabbed his backpack to pull out a spare pair of pants.
After he pulled the pants up and put on his boots and shirt, he finally headed for the door. Without looking at him, Meikiyo said, “And where are you going?”
“She isn’t safe out there. I have to protect her.”
“What about her heart? What about her honor? What about her trust?” Meikiyo spoke so calmly. There was something serene about her as she stood up to face him. It wasn’t the serenity of a still night. Rather it was the serenity of a sword’s edge, the calm of potential violence left unexpressed.
“I don’t understand what you are talking about.”
“God, Jay, I love you so much, but Amelia is right. Sometimes you truly are a bonehead.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you, Meikiyo. You are a precious flower to me.”
“And I forgive you. I love you. I am at peace with the fact that you mean more to me than I mean to you.” Her words cut him to the chase worse than the way Amelia had been berating him. He felt as though he had been cut to the quick.
She looked at him in silence for half a minute before continuing, “Don’t say sorry to me. If you want to apologize, then understand what I need. Understand what my sisters need from you. You give with all your strength but you don’t give with all your mind.”
Once again it made him strangely happy to see how the girls of his team were getting along so well. “I would fight for you, for any of you. I would kill for you. I have done both those things and I will do them again. I would even die for you.”
“There you are giving with your strength and I love you for it. When I was scared and lost in the night, you came for me. You were my hero, my lifeline,” Meikiyo paused and moved her mouth like she was tasting something unpleasant, “but you don’t give with your mind. You only see me as a flower. A flower is beautiful, yes. A flower is fragrant and to be enjoyed. Yet a flower is also fragile. Well this flower has thorns.”
As she finished speaking, flames burst out from her eyes. A jet of flame burst up from her palm and then tendrils of it danced along her skin. Her beautiful skin was made more so by intricate designs of fire whipping around her body. Jay stood there captivated.
Her words sunk into Jay like the creature's barbed claw from earlier. It tore at him, not because he was angry and not because she was trying to hurt him. It tore at him because it was true. He had failed them.
He had failed Huong because all she wanted was to be pleasing. She needed him to allow her to give. She needed him to receive from her and give back in kind with kind gestures and tender words.
He had failed Meikiyo because he had seen her grow and change into more than she had been before. He had seen her reveal the burning strength that was inside of her. She loved him more purely than he deserved and was willing to give him time to muddle through his own feelings.
Most of all he had failed Amelia. When he was being manipulated and used, she had spoken truth to him. She had offered him her trust when he knew she had been hurt in the past. He didn’t know all the details, but he knew that she had deep wounds. He had failed her because he had taken her trust lightly and then not lived up to it.
“You are right. She is brave and strong. She is my partner. She is our partner. I won’t soon forget that again. I will make amends however is needed. I can learn to give you what you all want, not what I think you need. You will have not just my strength but also my respect,” Jay spoke calmly at first but became more impassioned as he continued.
“Then sit and eat. Give her some space.”
Huong had sat up partway through his speech. He looked over at her and smiled. “Thank you for healing me. I don’t know what I would do without you.”
The smile he received in return was worth the pain of the lesson that he had learned. A part of Jay realized that he might have to learn the lesson more than once. For now though he realized that it wasn’t flowers to look at and enjoy that he wanted. It was a team that he wanted. A team could only be composed of equals.
This sentiment didn’t dim the desire he felt to protect them. It just made him realize that they might know better than he did what they needed. Maybe it would pay to listen. The trick was going to be knowing when to listen and when to just act, but anything of value was worth some work. He looked at both of them and knew they were worth a whole lot of work.
He sat at the table and ordered a meal from the mini terminal that each bungalow had. “Do either of you want anything. I’m starved but I feel guilty eating in front of you.”
“No you need food, we already had dinner hours ago. You were out for several hours. Oh that reminds me. When I was healing you I learned how to scan a body for injuries. It is a new Awarene
ss skill. I think it is going to really come in handy,” Huong said.
“I could imagine as a healer that it would come in handy.”
“Well yeah, that is the obvious application but I think it is gonna come in handy in some other ways. One that is fun and one that is serious.” Huong had a strangely crooked grin on her face as she spoke.
“Okay, I’ll bite. What is the fun way?”
“No, I don’t think you have earned the right to hear about that. I’m not sure that I’m entirely ready to forgive you yet, but I will tell you about the serious application.”
Jay shrugged and said, “Whenever you are ready.”
“It isn’t that shocking. I just think that I will be able to use it to study the bodies of our enemies and find weak spots. Like those new creatures that we fought last night. My vines weren’t able to contain them so I need a new way to contribute. Now I think I can. I will be able to scan creatures for weaknesses in their biology.”
Now Jay was truly intrigued. “So did you learn anything about those creatures?” he asked.
“Yes, I did. They are obviously alien. You already knew that, but they are more alien than the lizats and owlbear. Their bodies don’t contain any water. I believe that their internal tissue is in part composed of lithium.”
“And is that a good thing?”
“Yes and no. It makes them strong and durable but also vulnerable to water. I believe that under the right circumstance that water could harm them.”
“That is very cool.”
Then just as Jay was going to ask more questions the door swung open again and Amelia walked in. Jay simply watched her in silence. She didn’t have the seductive sway that Jasmine seemed to perform so effortlessly. That didn’t mean though that he didn’t like just watching her walk.
She stared at him as she crossed the room to the table. Then sat down and put her hands under the table as she positioned herself across from him. “I’m ready to listen.”
“Thank you. You are right. I didn’t treat you fairly. I had a gut reaction and the thought of being around a bunch of hormonal women freaked me out,” Jay said and as Amelia started to interrupt him he quickly added, “Please let me finish and then you can judge me.”
She sighed as Huong poked her side and said, “Okay.”
“I don’t know that I have ever fully shared what I am about to tell you with any friend and certainly not with any girlfriend. Of course I never really thought I could be as close to any girl as I am with any of you and now I’m connected to three of you.
“You have to understand this is hard for me to talk about. When I was eight, my mom and sister were gonna go get a surprise for my birthday. I had been whining and begging for the new Pokémon game for my Switch and the only place that had one was in the city. So Kari, my sister, talked my mom into driving in to get it.”
Jay looked down at the table and got teary eyed. Before he knew it, Meikiyo was sitting on one side of him and Huong on the other both cuddled up to him as if to reassure him. Even Amelia’s hand shot out from under the table and grabbed his. “They were hit by a semi-truck. My dad told me that Mom was tired after working all day and then drifted into the wrong lane and got hit. They both died, and it was all my fault. If I hadn’t been so selfish then they never would have gone into the city.”
A single tear dropped from his eyes onto the back of Amelia’s hand. Both girls on his sides pressed even closer and Huong said, “It’s okay. You can cry if you need to.”
Amelia sat quietly for a minute before she suddenly slapped Jay. Not hard enough to hurt but enough to make a smacking sound against his cheek. “That is total bullshit.”
Meikiyo snapped, “That was the truth if I have ever heard it, don’t be a bitch.”
“I believe the story. The bullshit is thinking that it is his fault,” Amelia said as she looked at Jay. “You weren’t driving. You didn’t hit their car and even if you asked you couldn’t have made them go to get the game.”
“I don’t know… my dad always said it was my fault.”
“Then he was a lying bastard taking out his grief on a little boy. Look, I understand you believing that shit when you were a kid. But you are grown up now. You face down monsters for fuck’s sake. No one would ever call you selfish. Maybe it’s about damn time that you got a little more selfish.”
“That sounds kinda messed up. Even if you are right. I mean I guess a part of me knows you are right, but it is just ingrained into me,” Jay said in a low mumble.
“Well then un-ingrain it. I call you a bonehead but part of that is because you are so busy looking out for everyone else that you can’t even see what is around you.”
“You want me to be selfish?”
Amelia said, “Not all the time, but some of the time, yes. I admit I was pissed, but I get it. I understood why you left even without you telling us your story. I assume the point was that you don’t know how to relate to women and always feel like you are at fault when anything goes wrong. Well I am here to say that there are three women sitting here right now who would beg to differ. We all like how you relate to us. Just get out of your own way.”
“She’s right. Respect us, don’t coddle us,” Meikiyo said.
“It’s okay to get what you want, Amelia is right about that,” Huong added.
“And don’t pull that shit again. We are a team and if I feel like being moody one day, then you are just gonna damn well have to deal with it,” Amelia said.
“Besides, it was a good thing. Because we are past the first threshold, we all gained regeneration as a skill and won’t be having any more periods,” Huong said.
“I know,” Jay said.
“How do you know?” Meikiyo asked.
“I felt bad and came back, but when I got here, there was a big meeting going on. I wanted to talk to you three alone but everyone was there and Jasmine was using her emotional persuasion thing. Honestly, I’m a little worried that I would fall under her influence.”
All three girls stared at him intently and then began speaking over one another, Huong to assure him that Jasmine only wanted what was best for everyone. Meikiyo in contrast agreed with him that she couldn’t be trusted and most surprising of all was Amelia’s response, “She isn’t that bad. Think about it. If she was on Team Jay, then all of that influence would be on your side and you would have all the advisors in one group. Besides, I know you think she’s hot.”
Amelia’s transition from pissed off to her own harsh method of buck up camper to pimping wingman almost gave him whiplash trying to keep up. “So, you are saying you would be okay with adding more girls to the team. I thought that you had dibs.”
The confused look on Amelia’s face spoke to the effects of Jasmine’s ability. “Well uh yeah, I do have dibs. I mean so do the slut and the sweetie,” she said as she pointed to Huong and Meikiyo in turn.
“Do you hear yourself? Turn on that critical mind of yours and think this through. How do you really feel about Jasmine?” Jay asked.
She stared back at him blankly for a minute. “Freak, you are right. That bitch was manipulating us. How did you resist her, Meikiyo?”
“It was hard, but I developed the Iron Will skill. I think it is similar to Jay. I fueled it with thoughts of how she wanted to control Jay and dishonor you two, my sisters. My anger pushed me through it. Even then it was hard for me to think bad thoughts about her. I didn’t start to feel free till after the fight,” Meikiyo answered.
“I still think you two are being too hard on her but maybe she can be a bit manipulative,” Huong said.
Amelia slapped the table. “That settles it. Jay and Huong can never be left alone with her. Honestly none of us should be alone with her.”
“There are a couple more things that I need to tell you about but first, I need to know if we are good here,” Jay said.
Again the three of them looked at each other. Then Meikiyo said, “I already told you that I love you. Love and forgiveness are playmates
as my mother used to say. Each can exist on its own but they are most complete together.”
Huong hugged him and kissed his cheek before saying, “If you want, I’ll show you just how much I forgive you.”
Amelia playfully slapped Huong’s arm. “You slut.” Then she got serious and looked at Jay. “You know how I feel about second chances. It isn’t that you needed to leave, or that you wanted some space or anything like that. You didn’t communicate with me. Then when those monsters showed up, you just tried to fight them all on your own. We can’t be a team if we don’t talk and how can I trust you if you don’t trust me. So just promise me that you learned something from this.”
Jay looked at her very solemnly as he took her face in his hand. “Absolutely. I won’t forget this lesson, but remember, I am just a guy so I may still slip up.”
