Chapter Twelve
Matthew woke up face down on the bed and opened his eyes, half hoping he was back in his hotel room in Vienna. But he soon saw this was not the case as he looked around him in the light of the day, still with his clothes and boots on. He was on a four poster bed in a sparse room with tapestries on the walls and a carpet on the stone floor. He then remembered the events of yesterday and his meeting with the Baron, as he turned his face back into the pillow. Why can’t this nightmare just end? he asked himself.
He then realised that Hannah was also still in this nightmare. He again thought about her hostile look at him last night but this time felt she did this because she was confused in her emotional state. They had both been. It had been horrible, all the physical tiredness, the stress of trying to escape, and the fighting and killing and blood and gore: which normal person wouldn’t be affected by all of that? Matthew asked himself.
That word again, he thought, “normal” – hell, he was obsessed with this word. How could he even think of such things after what he had experienced in the Land? he wondered, now getting annoyed with himself. Was this not his problem according to Martha: that he thought too much about things like this and did not experience life enough and follow his instincts?
Well, he had certainly experienced a lot of life since then, so what did he now think or rather what did his instincts tell him now? he asked himself.
He realised Martha was right and that of course he was “normal” like others and shouldn’t think otherwise. He could be injured and killed just like them. Moreover, his fellow humans mattered to him and were not just things that existed only in his mind. They interacted with him, which was sometimes unpleasant but sometimes very nice, as in the case of Hannah.
Yes, Hannah, who his instincts also told him mattered to him quite a lot. What is more, she liked him as well. Of course she did, Matthew realised: there was no other way of explaining her behaviour towards him. It was not just that she had dreamt that he would save the Land from the Baron: the way she interacted with him could leave no other conclusion. This was another example of his being “normal”; for attractive girls do not like “unnormal” people, do they? he asked himself sarcastically. So I should stop this “unnormal” nonsense and get on with my life.
He then remembered what else Martha had said to him about his having other talents, like intelligence. If she were right about the “Hannah” and “too much thinking” things then maybe she was right about this as well, thought Matthew. He sat up on the bed as it also occurred to him that the Baron would not have entrusted this task to a stupid person.
He then felt that he was getting a little carried away with these thoughts and that he was wasting time thinking about such things; the most important thing now was to try to find a way of saving Hannah – and her grandfather and friends who were real people in a dangerous situation. He could not just ignore their plight, though they mostly did not seem to think much of him.
He also knew that he had to do something himself and could no longer just be passive and react to what was happening, waiting for someone else to take the lead. He felt a little lonely and scared about this but he realised he had no choice. He then almost smiled to himself as he remembered he had had similar - though not quite the same he corrected himself - feelings when he had first left his hotel in Vienna to sightsee on his own. This now seemed such a long time ago. He also felt positive about seeing his parents again, though he did not know what he would tell them about his two days’ disappearance.
In this more determined mood, he went over to a table by the fireplace, where someone had lit a fire while he was still sleeping. Here he drank some water. He then went over to a window, from where he could see that he was somewhere in the big tower of the Castle. Outside, he looked at the forest below him in what he thought was the late morning sun. It was beautiful and seemed endless.
He had a little wash in a basin near the bed. Then the same servant who had seen him to his room last night brought him some breakfast: some bread, cheese, dried sausage and mustard, which Matthew quickly ate with relish. The servant then took him back to the room he was in yesterday. There were two soldiers outside it as there had been outside his own room.
The Destiny of Matthew Page 12
