I nodded, and we didn’t talk on the rest of the ride home, both lost in our thoughts. Once we got back to her parents’ place, I packed up and left. Danni would be leaving a little later. She’d asked me to drive along with her, but I needed the time to think. Everything had happened so fast.
I was still here, so obviously, I hadn’t hit the next big crossroads. But unlike Rick, where things stretched out for over a year, this was going from zero to one hundred in the course of a weekend. Even with all my insights into myself, and my behavior, and the way things went in my future—my past future—I still hadn’t been pulled out by Dhameer.
I honestly felt afraid of when that would happen. The pain of being taken from wish number one when Rick had proposed was still very much there. Only sheer force of will and the desire to not cheat myself, in spite of the tears my heart cried, kept me from curling up into a ball.
I laughed a little. I kept telling myself that, but the pain of leaving Rick wasn’t really easing. What would have happened had I gotten engaged just as I was getting ready to go to college? Would we have made it?
He’d planned for us to be in the same town, so I have to think that we would have. That means by now, I’d have married him—I mean, if I’d stayed in that wish and been twenty-six. We might even be having kids.
The thought of our non-existent kids made tears spring to my eyes. I had meant it when I told Seth that I didn’t want any, but there was something intoxicating about the thought of having kids with someone you loved.
I was halfway home before the tears stopped. Okay. I needed to focus on Seth. What happened next?
I had to keep telling myself it didn’t matter—that I wouldn’t be staying here, so now wasn’t the time for hesitation.
When I walked into my room, I realized I had more immediate problems. If I didn’t clean this place up, he’d take one look and run screaming.
Three weeks later
I was really excited to see him. The first weekend had been great. I had managed to keep my libido under control, and he had been a perfect gentleman. He had squired me around, met some of my friends, and basically just spent time in my life. It had been wonderful. We had talked on the phone every night for the past two weeks, and I found that today I impatiently waited for him to get here. I was excited to see him, to touch him, and to see if things were still as I felt they were. The ache from Rick hadn’t dissipated, but Seth eased it. Unlike Rick, things were still going a million miles an hour. I was afraid to admit it to myself for fear of vanishing in a cloud of glitter, but I was on my way to being in love. I could barely think the words, but they were there. Oh, please, please leave me here longer! I sent out a silent plea.
While I was musing over this in my head, there was a loud knock at the door. I leapt from my seat and almost ran to answer it. When I opened it, he was there. He dropped his bag and gathered me into a huge embrace. We stood together for a moment, and I felt like I had come home. How did he get to this place with me so fast?
“Why don’t you come in?” I said.
“What, and stop the show for your neighbors? Spoilsport,” he said.
“I have nothing against exhibitionism, but I feel more comfortable without it.”
“Pity. Here I thought you were adventuresome.”
“Oh, no. None of that guilt thing here. Did you ever think I wasn’t interested in sharing any aspect of you with anyone else?” I teased.
“Oh, well that would be fine. I am completely okay with you being all possessive and selfish,” he said. He came into my little room, filling it up as he’d done before.
“You made good time getting here,” I said, feeling a little breathless. He did that, overwhelmed me at times.
“I had a good reason to hurry.” He leaned down to kiss me. This might be the weekend that we ended up naked. The thought excited and unnerved me. You got to see a lot more than just naked ass the first time you took your clothes off in front of someone else. The first weekend he’d visited, there was a little dancing around one another, both of us being careful. But he kissed me, a lot, and I could tell he was struggling with his desire also. It didn’t help that the more we talked, and got to know one another, the more I knew he could be the right one. How do you choose between two Mr. Rights?
I also had the problem of nearly a month with no sex when I’d been having it regularly. It was hard going from gourmet-all-you-can-eat to nothing and the cupboard is bare! To say I was frustrated would be an understatement.
I didn’t want to rush this, though. Partly because I wanted to do this right, and selfishly, because I wasn’t ready to go back to my old life, where giraffe pee was the most exciting thing in my apartment in ages.
“What are we doing for dinner?” Seth asked. That sounded so domestic.
“I don’t know, I hadn’t thought about it. You want to go downtown? There’s a bar that does great burgers.”
“And you can get in?” We hadn’t gone out much at night when he’d been here last. We’d ordered in and watched movies, and cuddled and kissed and touched. He’d slept in the other bed in the room, since I didn’t have a roommate. My former roommate had dropped out, and the school hadn’t gotten around to assigning me a new one. I was fine with it. I liked being able to have a room to myself. Particularly now. If things kept heating up, I’d never want a roommate again.
“Fake ID, remember?”
“Oh, that’s right. I forgot. Great. Let’s go. I’m starving.”
I drove us down to the T. It was still early, by college standards, so we got a table easily.
“Oh my god,” I said. Shit. I couldn’t catch a break here.
“What?” Seth asked.
“Tim is here.”
“Good.” He reached across the table, and pulled my hand over, bringing it to his lips. He kissed it, and then made eye contact with me. “Don’t even look around. Don’t pay him any mind at all. Trust me.”
I smiled and allowed myself to relax. Who cared if Tim was here? I’d avoided seeing him since I’d met Seth. He would have moved along by now. As long as he wasn’t as assy as he’d been before. Seriously, though. With thousands of students, why did I have to run into him tonight?
Not that Seth looked bothered. In fact he looked like the head rooster in the henhouse. I’m not sure he could have puffed up any more.
“I’m glad you still let me come visit, Tibby.”
“Why wouldn’t I?” This changed my train of thought immediately.
Seth shrugged. “Sometimes, the newness fades really fast.” Why did his voice sound so sad? Was this part of his mysterious past?
“You know, you’re going to have to actually explain all these cryptic comments one day,” I said, tickling his hand with my fingers.
“I will. You’ll have to do the same.”
“You want a big share fest?” I smiled to show him I was teasing.
“No, not really. But it’s probably the right thing to do.” Oh. Now I definitely heard something.
“Let’s table it, okay?”
At that moment, the waitress came over. I was glad for the interruption. I didn’t want to get into anything serious. That might constitute a crossroad, and I wasn’t ready to leave yet. I had a feeling that I wasn’t going to get as long as I had with Rick. Rick had been a more regular part of my life, so it took more for me to reach a crossroads. Seth was shiny and new, and I felt like something was coming. Unlike Seth, I didn’t worry about the newness fading. It kept getting better and better. I didn’t think it possible, but it did.
I just wasn’t sure what. I didn’t want to leave this either. There’s that catch again, right Dhameer? I thought. Get what you want, and when you get it, it’s not exactly what you want. But you get it. Every bit of it.
I couldn’t dispel my thoughts of what I figured was coming later. It had that feel. The anticipation. All our glances, our touches—our everything—were supercharged. It’d been some time since I felt this way with someone. The newness
. No booze to cloud things. The excitement, both of us in a relatively good place. In and of itself, that newness was intoxicating.
Oh, god, I hoped we had sex. I don’t think I could stand to see him without his shirt and not stroke his abs one more night. What would sex be like with him? Someone who cared about me? A lot? Someone I felt the same way about? Someone who—
“Tib?”
“Oh, I’m sorry!” I saw that both Seth and the waitress were waiting on me to order something. “Can I just have a Coke?”
She nodded, smiled at Seth again, and hurried away. Uh huh. He was hot, but the waitress needed to mind her manners. I glared in the direction she’d gone.
Which put me right in the crosshairs of Tim. Damn it.
He took that to mean I wanted to talk to him, or something of the sort, because he stood and headed our way.
“Asshole alert,” I said to Seth quietly. “He’s coming towards us.”
Seth shrugged. “Let him. He’s already lost.”
I squeezed his hand across the table. I could fall in love with this guy. Honestly. He was just so fucking awesome.
“Tibby.”
Oh for fuck’s sake. Did he always sound so pompous? Probably. I just wasn’t able to see it back then. For some reason, I felt lucky he wanted to date me.
“Tim.” I felt Seth tense, and I patted his hand. I wanted him to know I had this.
“What are you doing here?”
I looked around in exaggerated surprise. “Why, the same as everyone else. Out with my guy, getting something to eat before we head home for the night.” I smiled brightly, and Seth gave me one of the megawatts. If we did have sex, he was getting something special in his stocking. For sure.
“Just as I thought. A total slut. Well, enjoy my leftovers, sucker.” He went to clap Seth on the shoulder, but Seth whipped around and grabbed his hand.
“You must be the dumbass.”
Tim’s eyes actually bugged. I’d always thought it was just an expression, but they actually bugged out. It was hilarious, and I wanted to giggle.
“What did you call me?”
“The dumbass. The dumbass who was fucking someone else when you had this girl. You lose, sucker. I win. Now get the hell out of here.” At that point, Seth stood up, still gripping Tim’s hand. He twisted it a little, and I saw Tim wince. Then Seth let go, and clapped Tim on the shoulder before sitting down and taking up my hand again.
“Fuck you, Tibby.” He didn’t have the balls to direct that to Seth.
“No, thanks. There’s no telling what you’ve caught.” I held Seth’s hand hard, trying to let him know not to get up again. He caught my eye, gave a rueful twist of his mouth. I felt his hand relax.
At that point, the poor girl he was with came over and tugged at his arm, murmuring something to him. She wouldn’t meet my eyes, and she wasn’t the one he’d been with the weekend I’d met Seth. Wow. He wasted no time. Asshole. The poor girl! She looked like she might die of embarrassment. I would have, if my date was over harassing his ex. Tim let her but glared at me until he sat down again.
“Thank you,” I said.
“It was totally my pleasure. What a dick.”
“I feel sorry for that girl. I’d be crawling into the floor by now.”
Seth shrugged it off. “Don’t let it bother you. He’s the past.” I could tell that he was trying to let it go as well. I liked that, liked that he felt protective. I also liked that he was man enough to let me do things on my own when I knew I could. He didn’t make a scene.
“And you’re the future?” I teased.
“You know it, baby!”
The waitress came back, eyeing me closely this time. She must have seen Tim making his big stand. Probably wondering what it was about me. Let her. We ordered, and the food came in a decent amount of time.
As we ate, we kept up the easy banter. That was good. Neither of us wanted to get into anything important here. Finally, it was time to go. We left, Seth with his arm around me, radiating possessive good cheer. I liked it.
When we got back to my room, he stretched. “You mind if I get into my PJs? I’m beat.”
“Sure.” I waited until he had gone into the bathroom, and then changed into my sheer pink nightgown. I wanted this tonight, and I didn’t want there to be any ambiguity.
He came back in, carrying his clothes. He didn’t look at me as he went to his bag, and stowed them away. Only then did he look up.
I was laying on the bed, arm on my hip. There was no mistaking my intent.
He didn’t say anything.
“Are you going to just stand there?” I asked quietly. I hoped I sounded at least a little sexy, but I couldn’t tell.
He took off his shirt, which made my heart race. God, that man had amazing abs. My gaze traveled upwards, meeting Seth’s eyes. The look in his eyes…I fell into them and was lost. Then he stepped out of his pajama bottoms, and came to the bed, his eyes never leaving mine.
“Are you sure?” His voice sounded a little hoarse.
“So very sure.” I held up an arm in invitation, and he slid down next to me. The warmth of his naked body next to my nearly naked body made me feel as though I might burst into flames. He pulled me close to him, and I could feel his hardness close to me. Not close enough, I thought. It had gone way beyond physical for me. I wanted to crawl inside his skin, be as close as possible.
Oh, god. I was falling in love with him.
He was of the same mind, because his arms tightened, and he leaned in to kiss me. It was even better than the very first time he kissed me. This time, I actually saw stars. I lost myself in his kiss. I could cheerfully never leave this bed. Ever.
And then, I saw an even brighter flash.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
I woke up in my room in the present day, again. Oh shit. Damn it all to hell! I could feel my teeth grind. It felt like one of those cartoon characters who loses in the end, wringing their hands and muttering, “Foiled again.”
The only improvement was that my room didn’t smell of pee. I couldn’t believe it. Dhameer had a way of making sure I knew what the hell a crossroad was. I didn’t get this one though. To me, this just didn’t seem like it was that big of a deal. Sex was a milestone in the relationship, sure. But a milestone? That didn’t make sense.
As if on cue. Dhameer appeared at the foot of my bed. Perfect timing.
“Okay, how was that a crossroad? Sex? A crossroad? Is this genie humor?”
“I actually don’t have control of when the crossroad is reached, Toots.”
“What do you mean?” I asked. “This is your gig. You’re in charge, here. Of course you have control. I just have to ask how sex was a crossroad, and why it couldn’t happen before I got to see him naked.” I couldn’t tell Dhameer that my heart, once again, felt ripped out by the roots. How had that happened in such a short time?
Dhameer sighed. “All right. Let’s go through this so that you understand. What do you think a crossroad is, in relation to your life?”
“A place that a decision sends you down different roads.”
“Exactly.” He looked at me like I had just solved a math problem.
“That doesn’t tell me anything, Dhameer! What do you mean, exactly? Exactly? That doesn’t answer a thing! I have had sex with plenty—plenty!—of people. It took things to another level, but a crossroads? Rick asking me to marry him and me accepting is a crossroad. Sex? Not even the same thing!” I leaned back with a huff. I was getting pretty loud, and I wanted to actually talk to him. I figured I had better stop with the yelling.
“Tell me something, Tabitha. What has gone on during your wishes? What is something you have noticed that you didn’t expect?”
I thought about it before answering. There had been a lot that I noticed. What was a big thing? I was quiet as I considered what would be the biggest thing.
“I guess that I was learning—well, unlearning—some of the things I learned in the past,” I said slowly.
“Well, that I didn’t have to take the crap dished out by others. Like when Dave and I broke up the first time around, he was so awful. He was as mean as he could be, and he talked so badly about me, saying things that were horrible. I had to deal with that even after he graduated, because people remembered me as a slutty chick who…well, who was easy in certain aspects.” I didn’t give greater detail because I was embarrassed to repeat it to Dhameer, who didn’t seem like he would appreciate hearing about the particulars of what Dave had said.
Dhameer smiled at me. I got the impression he knew what I wasn’t saying. “He was an unpleasant boy, that Dave. I was very pleased to see how well you dealt with him this time around. It completely changed school for him the rest of the year. You knew that, though, didn’t you?”
“I knew no one wanted to date him. Even the girls who didn’t care for me thought that I might be telling the truth, and didn’t want to hear about their imperfections while he expected them to take care of him. It was really empowering, realizing that I could just tell him to go to hell, and that if I told others why I did it, it wouldn’t necessarily reflect poorly on me if the truth came out.”
“What about with your second do-over?”
“That I was right to think that I should have given Seth a chance. That I should have listened to my gut instinct. That risk isn’t necessarily a bad thing. That my instinct was right about both Seth and Tim. That I needed to listen to myself. Not only do I not have to put up with crap from those who are supposed to care for me, but that I have good instincts, and I should listen to them. Also, that my friendships are just as important as any relationships with guys,” I thought of Danni. Realizing how I’d wrecked things with her was as bad as seeing where I missed out with Seth. This had been when X was working really hard, and we hadn’t talked as much. I’d been sad at the time, but it had led me to Danni. Before I ruined it.
“Very good, Toots. Very good, indeed. I am impressed that you have put the two together. I’m also pleased that you expanded your lessons to friendship. Life is very lonely without friends.”
Three Wishes: Time Traveler Romance (Heart Of The Djinn Book 1) Page 12
