“My heart did. Until I met you, it was as if it was frozen.” Mac chuckled as excitement threaded through his veins. “I know that sounds incredibly corny, but it is true. You’ve woken a part of me that has been dormant all my life.”
Saffron snuggled closer to him. “I’m scared that’s the part of Nina that’s gone to sleep or shriveled up and died. She misses Evan so much. I don’t think she’ll ever get over it.”
“She’s strong, she’ll keep going because she has the children. And one day she’ll learn to smile again and laugh again.” Mac dropped a kiss on top of her head. He wasn’t lying to his mate, he truly believed that Nina would find a way forward.
“I hope so.” Saffron patted his chest. “So, is this the place?”
Mac stopped walking and turned around to face Nina and the boys. “This is the place.”
“Awesome,” Jonas’s eyes shone with excitement, although Wes looked dubious as he scanned the area.
“So, what happens?” Saffron asked. “Since I am the only one here who has never seen a shifter shift.”
“It’s like magic,” Jonas said excitedly.
“It is a little like magic,” Mac confessed. “Although there are no magic words.”
“Aww, so we don’t get to say abracadabra?” Nina asked lightly.
Wes frowned and then his expression cleared, and a small smile spread across his face. “That’s what Dad used to say when we were small, and he used to shift.”
“You remember!” Nina gasped.
“Yeah,” Wes answered wistfully. “I do, I remember the first time he did it. The first time he said he was going to show me a magic trick, but it had to be our secret because other people wouldn’t understand. Then he stepped away from me, told me not to be scared and then he said abracadabra.” He waved his hands in the air. “Then he disappeared.”
“And were you scared?” Saffron asked.
“When he disappeared, yes. He was gone. For like a split second he was gone, and I was afraid he wouldn’t come back…” Wes’s voice trailed off as Nina went to him and slipped an arm around her son’s shoulders.
“But he did come back,” Nina whispered. “He always came back.”
“Not this time.” Wes buried his face in his mom’s shoulder and cried, big sobs that racked his body.
Jonas went to his mom and brother and wrapped his arms around them both. The three people who had lost part of their family hung on to each other, giving each other comfort.
Saffron turned to Mac, tears glistening on her cheeks as he opened her arms and she went to him. He held her close against his warm body, offering her his strength, offering her his love, offering her every piece of himself. She could take what she needed, and he would freely give it.
“Okay, why don’t we watch Mac shift.” Nina looked so frail next to her two almost fully grown sons. But they supported her, they wrapped her in their love and helped her stand up straight.
The resemblance to his own family was not lost on Mac. When their father died, the Winter family had supported their mom, they had carried her through the worst days until she’d come through the other side and began to live again.
Nina will find a way, his bear said gruffly as he swallowed down his emotions. We’ll help them. We’ll help them all because they are our family now, they are our responsibility.
It was strange that even though his brothers were now grown up and they were, at last, leaving the nest, Mac was about to take on a new role as provider. Nina and her sons were not of their blood, but they were of his mate’s blood and that was good enough for him.
“Are we ready?” Mac asked.
“We’re ready.” Nina nodded at the two boys and they helped her across the yard where she perched on a large pile of timber.
“Good luck.” Saffron kissed his cheek. “No pressure.”
“No pressure,” Mac repeated.
We’ll be fine, his bear bristled with excitement, ready to release himself into the world and finally meet his mate.
You always think we’ll be fine. Mac grinned and took one last look at his mate before the world faded away and his bear replaced him.
“Wow!” Saffron’s eyes widened as she stared at Mac’s bear. Who stared right back at her.
Go to her, Mac encouraged.
The bear lifted one large paw and set it down on the ground. His eyes never left Saffron’s face. He was scared she might turn around and run away. However, Wes and Jonas moved first and left Nina’s side to come and greet the bear.
“You are huge!” Jonas exclaimed.
I will take that as a compliment, his bear answered as he looked up at Jonas with happiness. His bear longed to protect the boys and their mom as well as Saffron. It was an innate part of him, to nurture and cherish those he loved.
“See, it is real,” Wes told Saffron, although his voice was filled with awe, there was a tinge of fear attached to it.
“This is going to happen to you soon.” Jonas glanced at his brother.
“I know,” Wes didn’t sound too sure about it.
“Mac told me it doesn’t hurt or anything,” Saffron reassured him.
“But how do I control it?” Wes asked.
“Mac will help you.” Saffron placed her hand on Wes’s shoulder.
Jonas lifted his hand and asked, “Can I stroke you?”
Mac’s bear nodded and took another step forward, his head lowered as the younger boy gently touched the thick bear fur. He shivered as Jonas tickled him under his chin like a dog, but he stood still, not wanting to frighten any of them.
“Your dad was a little smaller than Mac.” Nina moved slowly forward, her eyes sparkling with unshed tears.
“Was he the same color?” Jonas asked, although he didn’t take his eyes off Mac.
“A little darker. And he didn’t have silver tips to his fur.” Nina stood next to Saffron who reached for her sister’s hand. “But he was just as awesome.”
“Will I look like Dad?” Wes asked as he finally stepped forward and stroked the bear.
“I expect so.” Nina let go of her tears and cried, her sobs filling the night air as Saffron held her sister close.
“It’s okay,” Saffron said. “It’s all okay.”
“I miss him so much,” Nina sobbed. “Sometimes the pain goes away, and I find myself forgetting. But I don’t want to forget and so I hold onto the pain. I hold on to Evan.”
“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry,” Saffron told her sister.
“Come and say hello to Mac’s bear.” Jonas pushed himself to a standing position and went to his mom and gently took hold of her hand. “He’ll make you feel better.”
Mac watched Nina as she approached his bear, his heart aching for the woman who had lost so much. He wanted to take away her pain, but it was impossible. All he could do was give her comfort and make sure he taught the boys all he knew about being a shifter.
And being a man, his bear told him. They need a father figure and now what job is yours.
He would rise to the challenge and learn how to be a good father. He’d helped raise his brothers when their father died. Particularly Hex who was younger, not quite a man.
Don’t tell Hex that, his bear told him. But we were there for our family. We should be proud. Look what we achieved and look at Hex and Beck, they have their own mates and are about to embark on their own lives.
Even if they are a little late, Mac added.
His bear was right, they should be proud. This was a time of celebration. Mac only wished he could help Nina find true happiness once more.
Chapter Fourteen – Saffron
Shifters were most definitely a thing. She knew because she’d witnessed Mac disappear from this world and a bear take his place.
Yet still, she hardly dared believe it until she reached out and placed her hand on the bear’s thick fur. Her fingers entwined with the silver-tipped hair and she pushed deeper into the pelt until she touched the warm body underneath. The bear shivered an
d turned his head to look at her.
“Hi there.” Her forehead wrinkled. “I’m not sure what I’m supposed to call you.”
Mac’s bear looked back at her with unblinking eyes. She can call me whatever she wants, and I’ll come running, the bear replied in his head.
You’re besotted, Mac replied.
So what if I am? the bear answered. I’m not the only one.
Mac could not argue with his other side, however, he was ready to take back control so that he could talk to Saffron. He needed to know she was okay with everything.
She certainly looks okay, his bear answered as their mate buried her face in his thick fur and hugged him.
“He’s like a big teddy bear,” Jonas announced.
“I won’t be like a big teddy bear,” Wes insisted. “I’ll be ferocious and roar and growl and show my teeth and if you annoy me then I will claw you.”
“No, you won’t,” Nina said, although there was no real force behind her statement.
Mac’s bear swung his head around and looked menacingly at Wes. That is not how bears behave.
He can’t hear you, Mac reminded him.
Then you can tell him. Mac’s bear let go of the world around him and his mate and let their human side return.
“Wow, that is so cool!” Jonas said in awe as Mac placed his hands on his hips and looked down at Wes. He gave the boy a long stare before he glanced at Saffron.
She gave him a brief nod and glimpsed sideways at Wes. “I think Mac is about to give you your first lesson on being a bear shifter.”
“I am,” Mac said as he stepped closer to Wes, but he didn’t aim his words directly at the teenager, he needed both the boys to understand. “As a bear shifter, you have to keep control. You have to learn to respect your other side because if you don’t then it can get you into trouble.”
Wes swallowed hard and looked out into the forest, ignoring Mac’s advice.
Tell him about Lim, his bear said.
“My brother Beck went traveling this last year and met a young man named Lim. When Lim met his mate, she was married.” Mac felt uncomfortable telling this story, but he hoped to make Wes understand the need to keep his temper in check.
“His mate was already married?” Nina asked in surprise.
“She was. Her husband wasn’t a nice man.” Mac didn’t elaborate on how he used to hit his wife. “And Lim tried to help his mate but got into a fight with the other guy. The other guy wound up dead. And Lim is in prison.”
“He killed a guy?” Jonas’s eyes widened. “As a man or a bear?”
“Lim was a wolf. But when he hit the guy, he was a man.” Mac glanced toward Wes. “What I want you to understand is that it only takes a split second for you to lose control and in that split second your life might change forever.”
“Whether you are a man or a bear, or a wolf, you will get judged the same and punished the same.” Nina put a weary hand on Wes’s shoulder. “Your dad taught me that.”
“We should get you inside.” Saffron stepped forward and took hold of Nina’s arm. “Mac promised hot chocolate.”
“It sounds as though Mac knows the way to a woman’s heart,” Nina leaned in and whispered.
“I think he does,” Saffron agreed as Mac led them to the house flanked by Wes and Jonas. The two boys were bombarding him with questions, although Wes was still the quieter of the two.
“I worry about him,” Nina confessed as her steps slowed and Saffron offered her sister more support.
“Wes?” Saffron asked.
“Yes, Wes misses his father the most. I’m not sure if it’s because he’s older and thinks he needs to take on the world. Or whether it’s his age. Or whether he’s just angry because he lost his dad.” Nina rested her head on Saffron’s shoulder. “Thank you for this.”
“I didn’t do anything much, this is all on Mac.” She kissed the top of her sister’s head. “Maybe Wes is angry with the world because he believes the world took away his dad.”
“True, if we had answers then it might make things easier.” She sighed and it was as if the simple action took all of her strength.
“Nina, I know they never found Evan’s body, but…”
“Don’t worry, I’ve never put ideas into their heads. I’m the only one who truly believes Evan is still out there somewhere.” She sighed and her breath shuddered through her body. “It would be easier if I could just let him go. The agony of never really knowing is like a thousand cuts that never heal.”
“I’m so sorry, Nina.” Saffron lifted her eyes and stared at the retreating back of her mate. “I think I understand why. Now that I’ve met Mac, it all makes sense. And I’ve only known him for a short time. You and Evan built a life together, you had two beautiful children together…”
“Have,” Nina corrected and flashed Saffron a brief smile.
“Have two beautiful children together.” She hugged her sister briefly. “We’ve tired you out.”
“I am tired but I’m also very happy.” Saffron looked down at her sister who wore a bittersweet smile. “I was so worried about the boys. I was scared of letting them down and Evan down. What do I know about shifters? Not enough to teach the boys how to be one.”
“You’ve taught them how to be good human beings and that matters more,” Saffron told her. “They are a credit to you.”
“Even Wes with his temper? I wish I could have found a way to direct that anger into something. Anything.” She shook her head. “It’s built up over the last few months and I didn’t see it, not clearly. Not really until tonight. I’ve been too wrapped up in myself.”
“That’s not true. Wes is just going through some changes. I can still remember my teenage years. They were tough. But I had you.” Saffron desperately wanted to make things right for her sister and nephews. But there was no magic wand to be waved, they all had to help each other through it.
“We’re stronger together.” Nina glanced sideways at Saffron.
“And it’s not just you and me now. Mac can teach Wes to chop down a tree with an axe, that will give him something to direct his anger into.” Saffron glanced over her shoulder at the sound of an owl hooting. “Mac wants me to live here with him.”
“Of course he does,” Nina patted her hand.
“I can’t leave you and the boys,” Saffron said suddenly. “I promised I’d look after you all.”
“Yes, you can. This is your life and we appreciate what you’ve done for us…” Nina’s voice trailed off.
“I asked Mac if we could all live here and he said yes.” Saffron stopped walking. “I think he knew it was a dealbreaker.”
“No,” Nina insisted. “This is your chance at a new life. You deserve this, Saffron. You’ve done so much for us.”
Saffron shrugged. “Mac knows I won’t be happy unless you guys are okay. And anyway, his brothers will be moving out after the wedding. So, there will be room.”
“I don’t want to be a chain around your neck tightening until it cuts off the air supply.” Nina always did have a dark sense of humor, but she was being dead serious.
“You and me against the world,” Saffron reminded her sister.
“Or against Mom.” Nina took a shaky step forward. “I’m surprised she isn’t here already trying to drag us back home.”
“Have you heard from her at all?” Saffron asked. She didn’t tell Nina her fears over the conversation their mom had with Jonas earlier. Saffron suspected a visit was imminent but didn’t want to worry Nina. Not now when her spirits had been raised by seeing Mac’s bear.
“Not since she called me a couple of days ago. It was a heated conversation. Which explains why she chose to get her information from Jonas. I’m sure she’s formulating a plan right now to take the boys.” Nina tilted her head and looked at the moon. “But she can plan all she wants, we’re not going anywhere. The boys love it here in Bear Creek and so do I. I can almost feel my strength returning.”
Saffron didn’t answer as the
y reached the kitchen door and went inside. Bright lights and the smell of hot chocolate filled the large, airy kitchen. “Wow, that was fast.”
“You took ages,” Wes said as he carried two mugs of hot chocolate to the table and set them down. “These are for you.”
“Thanks, sweetheart.” Nina settled herself down into a chair and Saffron helped her sister push it under the table.
“This smells wonderful.” Saffron picked up her mug of chocolate as she sat down.
“Whipped cream.” Jonas set the cream down on the table. “Marshmallows.” He pointed to a bowl of small white fluffy treats. “And sprinkles.”
“Your family sure know how to make hot chocolate, Mac,” Nina said as she reached for the cream.
“My mom always made it for us when we were kids. We’ve never grown out of it.” He winked at Saffron, obviously happy with how the evening was going.
“Here, let me.” Wes dashed around the table and added the whipped cream to his mom’s mug.
“Thank you.” Nina caught hold of her eldest son and hugged him.
“I love you, Mom.” Wes hugged her back. As his arms tightened around his mom, he squeezed his eyes tightly shut as if stemming a flow of tears.
Wes was scared of losing her. He was scared of losing his mom when he had already lost his dad.
They needed to find a way of building Nina’s strength back up. They needed to get her to move on and accept that Evan was gone.
But as Saffron raised her eyes and looked at Mac, she knew that might be impossible. The love between a shifter and their mate was unbreakable, even in death.
Chapter Fifteen – Mac
“Are you okay?” Mac asked quietly as they went out to the car to fetch the stuff for the sleepover.
“How did your mom cope when she lost your dad?” Saffron stopped walking. “Sorry, don’t answer if it’s too painful.”
“It was a long, long time ago,” Mac assured her. “The pain is still there for me and my brothers but it’s like it happened in another lifetime.”
“I suppose it will be the same for Wes and Jonas.” Saffron turned back toward the car. It was getting late and the boys and Nina needed to be in bed.
Mac (Winter - Shifter Seasons Book 3) Page 11
