by S. Nelson
“James Hollen?” I sounded bored even though my curiosity had been piqued.
“Ford!” Stephanie shouted. “Just tell her. Go wake her up and give her this message. I told James she’ll be calling, but she has to do it within in next half hour. Do you have a piece of paper? I’ll give you the number.” I didn’t answer while I searched for something to use to take the message, but I supposed I wasn’t quick enough. “Are you ready?”
“I’m trying to find a paper and pen. Give me a second.” She huffed into the phone and I almost accidentally hung up on her, but I realized the importance of this call, so I didn’t do something so childish.
I rooted through two drawers before I found a pad and pen. “Okay, give me the number.”
Stephanie rattled off the information and hung up after reminding me once more how important it was for me to give Cara the message as soon as possible.
As I held the paper in my hand, prepared to walk back upstairs and wake Cara, Owen walked in the back door and for some reason, guilt bombarded me.
I hated hiding things from my brother, but Cara and I never discussed the ramifications of what happened last night. Revelations came to light from both of us and we didn’t have the emotional energy to dive into where to go from there. I suspected that conversation would happen sooner than later.
“Hey,” he said, looking at me with his brows slanted inward. “When did you come over here?”
“Just a few minutes ago.”
“Really? ’Cause I was in our kitchen for the past twenty minutes and you weren’t there.” He tilted his head and deepened the crease between his eyes. That was the one thing that got under my skin about my brother. He was a dog with a bone, so before he asked me a million-and-one questions, I threw him a correction.
“Then it must’ve been a half hour ago,” I lied.
“What time did you get home from your date last night? Sorry, I mean Cara’s date?” The corner of his lip twitched and had I not ended up in bed with her last night, his comment would’ve got under my skin.
“Late.”
“How did it go?”
“Fine.”
“What did you do afterward?” he asked, leaning against the corner of the island, hell-bent on driving me crazy with his incessant questions.
“Retired for the night.”
“I don’t recall hearing you come in.”
“Are you done now?” I had no patience for twenty questions so early in the morning, especially when I was trying to hide shit from him. I’d been told I was a hard man to read, but if Owen kept digging, he’d uncover the truth, or a part of it, at least.
“For now.” He smiled, but his expression fell when Emily walked into the kitchen. He glanced from her to me then back again, a mix of worry and guilt plastered on his face.
“I’ll take the upstairs this morning. You can check down here and then we’ll both do the perimeter.” I never waited for his answer before I headed back up the stairs and down the hall toward Cara’s room.
* * *
Cara
Stretching my arms above my head, I sensed I was alone even though my eyes were still closed. The moment I opened them, everything would become too real, and I needed those extra seconds to live in my bubble, wrapped up in the notion that my life could take a turn for the better.
I never intended on telling anyone about what happened to me when I was younger, hoping to take that devastating secret to my grave, but it all happened so fast I was powerless to stop the words before they left my mouth.
Rolling over onto my side, I pried my lids open and looked out the window, the blinds resting several inches from the bottom. Slivers of light filtered into the room and each steady breath I pushed from my lungs promised hope. Or at least I wanted to believe that. The dawn of a new day. Wasn’t that what people meant when they used that phrase?
Lost in the memory of last night and what would happen going forward, I never heard anyone enter my room. But my body tingled, and I knew he was close. When I turned to face the other side of the room, Ford stood in the doorway, watching me, still wearing the clothes he had on last night.
“What time did you get up?” I sat up, my robe opening and revealing most of my breasts. Ford looked behind him quickly, then closed the door before diminishing the space between us.
“Not too long ago,” he answered, his eyes traveling down my body before landing back on my face. He smiled more with his eyes than he did his mouth, and all I wanted to do was grab him and pull him on top of me. It was too risky, though, and if his brother or my sister walked in and caught us, we’d have to explain. I wouldn’t know where to begin, and I doubted Ford did either.
“Do you regret what happened?” he asked, shifting from one foot to the other. His uncertainty alleviated my own, but I didn’t know how to answer. Was he talking about the sex or me telling him about the rape? Or both?
“If you’re talking about us sleeping together, the answer is no. But if you’re talking about…” I shrugged my shoulders and tilted my head from side to side a few times. There was only so much my brain could handle and I didn’t possess the mental strength to think about what I’d told him. To deal with the implications of all that it entailed. “I don’t know yet.” I nodded. “Do you?”
“Do I regret having sex with you?” Ford sat on the edge of the bed and touched my arm. “Not one bit.”
“What about telling me what you did about your sister?”
“Yes and no. I’m still overly protective of Julia, and to talk about her and what happened, especially revealing my part in the whole damn thing… it hurts. Too much.”
“So, where do we go from here?” I asked, uncertain if I wanted to know the answer just yet.
“Not sure. Our situation is a little complicated right now.”
“I know.” Ford moved his hand and I saw he held a piece of paper. “What is that?”
He looked down before handing me the note. “Sorry, it was the whole reason I came up here.”
I gave him a nod, not wanting to showcase my insecurities by asking him if it was the only reason he’d come to my room. But he must’ve sensed my doubt because he put my mind and ego at ease.
“The message wasn’t the only reason.” He rose from the bed. “Your phone kept ringing, so I answered. Stephanie was the one calling. She said it’s imperative you call him right away so you don’t miss out.”
“Call who?” I looked down at the paper in my hand and saw a name scribbled down but couldn’t make out what it said.
“James Hollen.”
“What?” I shouted, lowering my voice when I realized how loud I’d been. “When… what…when?” I repeated, flustered with excitement and forgetting about everything else. Nerves shook me while I tried to regain an ounce of composure.
Ford turned around and walked toward the door. “Let me know when you’re ready and where we’re going.” He left before I could ask him anything else.
I continued to sit on the bed in a daze. I was about to call one of the most renowned designers of my time, and it was all due to my friend. The same friend who’d unknowingly been mixed up in one of the most disastrous times in my life. My friendship with Steph had been affected by what her father had done to me. I’d cut ties with her over the following days and weeks after it happened, blaming my absence on other things, and while guilt ate at me for doing it, I couldn’t tell her the real reason.
I’d been fortunate enough to maintain contact with her over the years, and thankfully so, because she’d just done me one of the biggest favors of my life. And even if nothing ever came of it, I’d be forever grateful she’d tried to make my dreams come true.
I searched my room for my cell, but then realized Ford must have it since he was the one to take the call. I rushed into the hallway and down the stairs, barreling into Emily when I turned the corner into the living room.
Her eyes were red and puffy.
“What happened?” I asked, hoping it wasn�
��t anything serious because, for as much as I wanted to talk to her, I needed to make this phone call.
She shook her head and hurried past me without a word, giving me the opportunity to deal with what I had to before searching her out to talk about what was going on.
I walked into an empty kitchen, and for a moment, I was disappointed Ford wasn’t there. But my upset was canceled when I spotted my phone on top of the island.
Grabbing my cell, I swiped the screen and dialed the numbers on the piece of paper. I swore I held my breath during the time it took for the call to connect, and three rings later I heard a man’s voice on the other end.
“Hello?” His tone was deep.
“Hello? Is this James Hollen?”
“It is. Who’s this?”
“My name is Cara Dessoye. I’m a friend—”
“Yes, of course. I’ve been waiting for you to call.”
“You have?” I asked, surprised.
“Stephie couldn’t stop going on and on about how talented you were, so I figured it couldn’t hurt to see what you got. Can you meet me in the city at noon?”
“Absolutely.” I glanced at the clock above the sink and saw it was 8:45. If I hurried, I could get ready and have enough time to make it to our meeting on time, barring any issues with traffic.
“Just bring what you have.”
“I don’t have anything professional put together, yet. I just have a sketchbook. But I can bring along two outfits I recently made.” I tried not to stumble over my words, my nerves rattling me the more I spoke.
“Great. See you then.”
I raced outside and into the guesthouse, surprising Ford who was in the middle of taking a drink. At seeing me, he spilled the water down the front of him and I couldn’t help but think that I’d love for him to remove his shirt so I could take a quick peek before I had to get ready.
“Woman,” he grunted, brushing off the pellets of liquid from his shirt. “You have to stop rushing in here like that.”
“The last time I did it, I was in a much different mood.” I swore my cheek muscles were getting sore from smiling.
“Did the call go well?” he asked, taking a few steps closer. Owen walked into the room before he was able to touch me, and because there was a respectable distance between us, I doubted his brother thought anything inappropriate was going on.
“It did. He wants to see me at noon. In the city.”
“Okay. I’ll be ready to go.”
As I was about to turn and leave, I locked eyes with Owen. “Do you know why Emily is upset?” I intended to ask my sister that very same question but was curious if he knew anything, and if he’d tell me.
He shook his head and flashed me too quick of a smile. Owen also cleared his throat before answering. “No, I don’t.” He averted his eyes for a moment, and I knew right then that whatever my sister was upset about had everything to do with him. Problem was, I didn’t have enough time right then to get to the bottom of whatever happened.
While I showered, I couldn’t help thinking that my life could change after my meeting with James. Maybe I was being presumptuous, but I believed that something good was fated for me. Not that I’d done anything to deserve it, but I still wished, nonetheless.
Rushing through my normal routine because time was an issue, I got ready in record speed. Minimal makeup, a purposely half up-do, one of my favorite, simple yet classic black dresses, and a pair of red peep-toe Jimmy Choo’s, and I hurried from my room and into the hallway. Emily came out of her room the same time as I passed by and we almost smacked into each other, narrowly missing by inches.
“Where are you off to?” she asked, rubbing at her still puffy eyes.
I looked her up and down before answering, worried about her. “I have a meeting with James Hollen in the city at noon.”
“When did this happen?” She smiled big and grabbed my shoulders. “Oh my God!” she exclaimed, looking down at my hands. “Aren’t you going to take anything with you to show him?”
“Holy shit! I completely forgot to grab the outfits and my portfolio.” I shoved my purse at her and ran back to my room. In my haste to leave, it’d completely slipped my mind to bring the very things I needed to showcase, the entire reason why James wanted to see me in the first place.
Gathering my book and the outfits I’d made for the charity event, I reemerged into the hallway and headed toward Emily, careful not to drop anything. She tucked my purse under my arm.
“We’re gonna talk as soon as I get back. I want to know what’s going on with you.” Emily looked down at her feet and closed her eyes. I swore she was about to cry again, but when she looked back up, the glassiness of her eyes was gone.
“And I want to hear all about your meeting. I know he’s going to love you.”
“I don’t need him to love me. I need him to love my designs,” I joked.
“You know what I mean.” She leaned in and kissed my cheek, and I wanted to remain in that moment for a few seconds longer. When I looked at Emily right then, I saw the mirror image of myself. Not the physical attributes, because we were fraternal twins, but the longing to be seen, and understood. That was the reflection I referred to, something we intimately shared standing there in the hallway.
Ford walked halfway up the staircase and took the outfits from me, interrupting my unspoken time with my sister. “You won’t make it if you fall on your face.”
“Thanks.” I smiled but it fell away when I realized I was grinning at him a little too long, and Owen was standing at the foot of the steps, watching us.
When we made it outside, we put the clothing and the portfolio in the back. Then I walked toward the passenger side. Ford didn’t say a word as I sat beside him. He just gave me a look before turning over the engine. When he looked at me again as we drove away, I was curious as to what he was thinking.
“What?”
He shrugged. “I’m just surprised you’re sitting in the front seat again.”
“Well, considering we had sex last night, I think I can sit next to you, don’t you think?” It was a joke, but he didn’t laugh or even smile. “Should I not have said that?”
“You didn’t say anything wrong.”
“Then, what is it?” The hairs on the back of my neck stood at attention, and I couldn’t decide if my reaction was because of unease due to the nature of mine and Ford’s relationship or my upcoming meeting. Or maybe it was a mixture of both.
“It’s nothing.”
“Ford.” He looked over at me, then back to the road. “What is it?” I repeated, growing impatient with his silence.
“I was just thinking that I’d love to hike up your dress and fuck you right where you sit.”
Okay, I didn’t see that one coming.
* * *
Ford
I meant what I said, even though I should’ve kept that to myself. Now all I’m going to fixate on is what she has on underneath her dress and how wet she’d be if I put my hand between her legs.
Cara shifted in her seat more than once, bouncing between looking out her window and turning to look at me. We didn’t talk for several minutes, the last thing I said resonating between us both.
“I probably shouldn’t have made that comment. Sorry.” I had no idea what else to say. The mounting tension was enough to strangle me if I let it continue building. I’d never been in this sort of predicament before.
I’d protected high-powered people before.
I’d been put in precarious situations in the past, some requiring split-second decisions to ensure the safety of the person I’d been assigned to.
But I’d never slept with a client before, much less one I was still employed to watch over.
“I like what you said. But yeah, it is awkward, especially when I’m trapped behind this damn seat belt.” She laughed, something she hadn’t done often since I’d known her. At least, not with me. “Now, if you said that while we were still in my room, then the outcome would be a whole
lot different.” Cara reached over and put her hand on my thigh.
“You shouldn’t do that.”
“Why?” She moved to face me.
“Because you’ll definitely be late for your meeting.”
“Oh.” She wasn’t sure if I was toying with her or not, so she placed her hand back in her lap.
There were so many questions I wanted to ask her, but I didn’t want to rile her or turn our calm situation into a hostile one. Stress was the last thing either of us needed, especially her.
I didn’t know much about the fashion industry, but I’d looked up James Hollen as soon as Stephanie gave me his name. Not being able to find any scandals involving him put my mind at ease, but when I clicked on a picture of the guy, my gut tightened. I was man enough to admit that he was good looking, and for as much as I hated to admit to myself, I knew Cara would find him attractive, as well. What if he propositioned her? Enticed her to sleep with him and he’d in return give her a shot? Would she take it? Before last night, I would’ve said it wouldn’t surprise me at all if she slept with someone solely to further whatever agenda she had. But now? I wasn’t so sure. Maybe that was just me being egotistical, thinking since we had sex, she couldn’t possibly want anyone else, but the reality was Cara and I weren’t involved. Other than me being her protection detail.
“Your knuckles are turning white,” Cara pointed out, tapping my hand on the wheel. “What’s the matter?” Her tone was one of concern, but there was no way I would ever tell her where my thoughts were. So, what did I say instead?
“I’m thinking about what you told me. About what happened to you. I think you should tell your family.” As soon as the words were spoken, I knew I’d made a mistake.
Her entire demeanor had changed in seconds, from her breathing to the tension she now held in her posture.
“Cara….”
“No.” She kept her eyes away from me. “No,” she repeated. “I can’t.”
“But you have to deal with it. You can’t just pretend like it never happened.”
