Sliding his hand along her neck, he said firmly, “You have no reason to worry, Madeline.”
“Thank you for that. I’m afraid its second nature.” Settling beside him, she took his hand. “Mikayla took a pre-dawn flight to Tulsa. She told me she needed to hug our mom.”
“Did something happen last night?”
Her dark hair glistened in the low light as she shook it. “We watched a couple of movies, ate too much ice cream, and went to bed. She woke me up at five to say goodbye.”
“You didn’t go dancing?”
“Neither of us saw the point.” Looking across the room, she added, “She said she was lonely and needed to see my parents, to remember her dreams.”
Ezra took in the sight of Madeline in yoga pants, sneakers, and a t-shirt. “Did you go to the gym?”
“I…meant to. I thought I’d check to see if you were here. Take you to breakfast.” They stared at one another for a long moment in silence. “I needed to touch you. That’s really what it was.”
He squeezed her hand and murmured with regret, “I haven’t brushed my teeth.”
Reaching in her bag, she pulled out a bottle of water. “I don’t care. Swish if it makes you feel better.”
Taking a long drink of the water, he capped it and set it on the floor. Then he pushed her back to the couch and stripped their clothes away in record time.
Only when they were naked together, hands on each other, his sheathed cock buried inside her, did Ezra feel as if he could breathe again. He drove her through two orgasms and as he came, she whispered at his ear, “I needed to remember a few things myself.”
Arms tight around her, the feel of her limbs hugging him back, he pressed his lips to her ear as his heart threatened to beat out of his chest.
“What did you need to remember, Madeline?”
“How you feel in my body, the way you smell, how warm you are.” She nuzzled her cheek against his. “I wanted to know what your stubble felt like and how your eyes look when you first wake up.”
How quickly she could render him speechless.
He felt her tears on his skin though she never made a sound. When he tried to pull back to look at her face, she held the back of his head with her palm.
“No. It’s nothing. Don’t let me go, Ezra.”
Adjusting his lower half, he settled more fully into the cradle of her body.
Her arms and legs pulled him closer. He didn’t want to crush her but her movements forced him to relax. Finally resting his full weight on her, his arms crossed above her head, she sighed in a way that sounded relieved. No woman had ever held him so securely.
“Just like this. Stay with me, Ezra. I’m so tired…so tired.”
Seconds later, he knew Madeline was asleep. He also knew he was irrevocably in love with every aspect of the woman in his arms. What he was going to do about it, he had no idea.
Everything about her calmed him, soothed a part of him that ached without relief, and he quickly dropped to sleep. It was the deepest, most peaceful sleep of his life.
* * * * *
Hours later, Madeline opened her eyes as her body instinctively hugged Ezra firmly. He lifted his head to stare down at her and she traced his face.
How she loved him.
“Thank you.”
“For what, Madeline?”
“Being who you are, knowing how to settle my mind without even trying.”
Going up on his forearms, he held her head in his palms. “You’re frightened?” She nodded and he kissed her for a long time. When he broke it, he stared at her as his fingers massaged her scalp.
“You are a brilliant and talented woman, Madeline. I’ve been in this business all my life; first with my family and then with my brother. What you’ve done with the play is genius. It’s smart, fun, and filled with talented people no one has heard of before…but they will after this show.”
Tears slipped into her hair and she cursed them silently.
“You have to believe in what you’ve created, with every part of yourself. You have to dare the world to question it, dare them not to believe as strongly as you believe. This play will be a success. Your dream will be fulfilled.”
“It isn’t my dream, Ezra.” His eyes went wide. “It’s only a stepping stone to my dream. The most important but it’s no more than that.”
“What’s your dream?” Gazing at her, he didn’t blink. “Tell me, Madeline.”
“Ask me again after the show opens. Will you do that?” He nodded. “I can’t…I don’t want to risk so much. Not yet. Do you understand?”
“You risk nothing with me, Linn but I’ll ask again after you open.” His body rocked into hers and she gasped. He grimaced as he kissed her face, pulled out, and went to dispose of the condom.
She was shocked when he ripped open another, rolled it over a cock that was hardening again, and returned between her legs. He never looked away as he worked himself deep and stilled.
“Right now, the only thought in my head, pounding steadily through my veins, is making love to you again, Madeline. Watching you, feeling you, listening to you as I forget the world outside this room.”
“Yes.”
It was late afternoon when they dressed and went to eat. She wanted him to come home with her but she didn’t ask. She thought he wanted to come home with her but he didn’t say. After a long kiss at the door of her building, he returned to the cab and waited for her to get safely inside. She watched from the foyer as he drove away.
When he was out of sight, she rubbed her hand over her heart and went upstairs. The apartment she shared with her sister was quiet and she took a long bath. She was sore after her hours with Ezra.
Every cell inside her body wanted him with her, wanted him touching her, fucking her. There would never be enough of him.
That no one in her life knew about her involvement with the first man she’d ever loved made it feel surreal, almost part of her imagination. She wondered why she hadn’t confided in her sister, her twin, and knew the reason was guilt.
Mikayla was struggling with something she didn’t understand, was clearly in love with a man she did not know. Madeline was also in love, spent stolen hours with the object of her affection, and it felt…unfair to have those moments when Kayla couldn’t even introduce herself to Isaiah Zelder.
Until her sister found her way out of intense melancholy, she would keep her feelings to herself. The combination of overwhelming joy at being in love and terror that it was only temporary would be borne in silence.
As she climbed beneath her blankets and turned off the lamp, she thought about Ezra. It took her a long time to fall asleep.
* * * * *
The buzzer for the foyer door dragged Madeline from a fitful night’s rest. Stumbling through the apartment, she pressed the intercom.
“Who is it?”
“Ezra. Let me in, pretty girl.”
Her hand shook as she pressed the unlock code and opened her front door. Within seconds, he was on the landing of their second floor hallway. Though he held bags in his hands, he set them on the floor just inside her entryway and took her in his arms.
Pressing her against the open door, he claimed her mouth completely. It wasn’t until he broke the kiss that she realized she hadn’t brushed her teeth.
“Did I wake you?” She nodded. “You’re beautiful. So damn beautiful, Madeline.” One more kiss and he bent to pick up the bags. “Lead the way to your kitchen. We need to talk.”
Closing and locking the door, she did. He placed the bags on the counter and unpacked them. Every few seconds, he glanced up to smile at her.
She was surprised and a little awed by the ingredients he took from the sacks. Grass-fed filet mignon, enormous diver scallops, and various vegetables appeared and the last bag held French bread and bagels that filled the small kitchen with the scent of garlic.
“I brought simple things for breakfast. Do whatever you normally do in the morning and I’ll start coffee.” L
inn started to tell him where the grounds were but he held up a pound of gourmet blend from her favorite café. “Taken care of and don’t worry about me. I’ll call you when everything is ready.”
Sliding off the stool, she walked around the island and stood in front of him in her bare feet. His height had never been more obvious. Turning, he took her in his arms and hugged her tight.
“Good morning, Madeline.”
“Good morning.” Having him in her space, her arms wrapped around his waist, his hand on the back of her head to hold her to his chest, she could have cried from the simple pleasure of it. “I won’t be long. I just need to brush my teeth and hair.”
“Take your time. I’m not going anywhere.”
How she wished that were true.
One more squeeze and she let him go, walking to her bathroom to take care of morning necessities. After she ran a brush through her hair, she pulled it into a messy bun. Part of her considered changing clothes but she stayed in pajama pants and a t-shirt.
Back in the main room, Ezra was dicing shallots on the other side of her counter.
He motioned for her to return to the stool and paused what he was doing to pour her a cup of coffee, exactly the way she liked it. Placing it in front of her with a smile, he took a sip of his own before returning to prepping.
“I’m making you steak, broiled scallops wrapped in bacon, a chopped salad, and a baguette for dinner.” Her eyes went wide and her mouth instantly started to water. Opening her refrigerator, he removed one of her platters covered in plastic. “For breakfast, we have bagels, cream cheese, nova, whitefish salad, sliced onions and tomatoes, olives, and egg salad.”
Removing the plastic cover, he set the plate on the bar.
“That’s really pretty. Everything sounds fantastic. We’d never had real bagels until we came to New York.” She made a silly face. “Breakfast bread in our neck of the woods is biscuits.”
“I love biscuits.”
She grinned. “I’ll have you know, I make the best biscuits this side of Oklahoma, thanks to my mama. I also make white gravy that is guaranteed to clog your arteries. Naturally, eggs, bacon, and grits round out the heart-stopping meal. Kayla and I only eat it a couple of times a year.”
“I look forward to it. My heart is strong enough to take it.” His seriousness made her laugh.
She made her bagel and took samples of the salads and decadent olives. Waiting for him to join her, she watched him prepare food like a gourmet chef. Scraping all of his finely diced ingredients for the salad in a glass dish, he covered it with plastic, and placed it in the fridge.
Picking up his coffee, he walked around to sit beside her.
“Now, I’d like us to have some ground rules, Miss Johannson.” She nodded and tried to hide her nervousness. “Your play opens in a few days to your first live audience. I know you’re worried and you seem to have some sort of hesitation about being publicly involved with me until you know if it will be well-received.”
Swallowing hard, she didn’t answer. That was one reason…but not the only one. He reached out to smooth his palm over her hair.
“There’s more. I’m not sure what it is but I can see it on your face. I trust you to tell me everything in your mind after you launch.” She gave a small nod. “I plan to sweep you off your feet, Madeline. I will not stop until you’re mine. It’s best you know that up front so you can prepare your defenses.”
Eyes wide, she considered the words. Did he mean…?
“I’ll let you marinate on that and add that whatever your reservations, I plan to overcome them. We will keep things light and concealed for a few more days. After that, all bets are off.” He leaned forward and kissed her soundly.
“Today, you’re going to eat and I’m going to make love to you in a damn bed. Then you’re going to eat again and I will tuck you in after I’ve fucked you into exhaustion so you can sleep deeply. Tomorrow, expect a repeat of today with a different menu. Should Mikayla come home early, you’ll spend your day at my home. I want you there anyway.”
“Ezra…”
“Hush. Eat and enjoy the simplicity. We’ll make things ridiculously complicated soon enough. Agreed?” A small laugh escaped but she agreed. “Excellent. Take your time but hurry up. Seeing you in pajamas and not wearing a bra has had me hard as granite since I topped the landing.”
For two days, Ezra fed her gourmet food he prepared, asked her a million questions he said he’d wanted to know about her life, danced with her in her living room if a song came on that she loved, and fucked her unconscious.
It was unlike any other weekend she’d ever had and she didn’t want it to end. Her sister’s return was bittersweet.
The reaction during charity previews would determine if there would be an official opening night to the general population. There was so much on the line and a part of her dreaded appearing in front of an audience who would determine the success or failure of two years’ work.
The rest of her thought the days couldn’t pass quickly enough.
Chapter Eight
September 2012 – Season One (first night of charity previews)
Madeline was going to have a heart attack. There was no escaping it. She could hear people filing into the main theater and she couldn’t find Mikayla anywhere.
Rushing up the back stairs, she busted in on Ezra and one of his technicians without knocking. “I’m sorry to interrupt…have you seen Mikayla?”
Ezra shook his head but she was gone before he could say whatever he’d opened his mouth to say. She entered the backstage area at a run and was shocked when her twin emerged from the inky darkness that ran around the back of the theater.
Skidding to a stop, she forgot everything both of them had to do, how hard they’d worked, or what was on the line. She simply stared at her sister in shock and confusion. Mikayla was smiling – truly smiling – for the first time in weeks.
“Kayla? Are you okay?”
Her nod accompanied a huge grin. “Better than okay, Linn. Oh my lord…just better than you can possibly imagine.”
“Kayla, have you been drinking, sweetheart?”
Linn knew her twin felt the entire success or failure of the play rested on her shoulders. Nothing she said or did had been able to change it. If she’d had a couple of drinks to calm down…more power to her provided she didn’t fall off the stage.
Mikayla laughed and the sound positively joyful.
“Drinking could never make me feel this good. I know all my lines, I’m focused, and ready whenever you are, sis. Let me run to the bathroom and I’ll meet you in the wings.”
Kayla darted to the nearest restroom and emerged ten minutes later, looking fresh and lovely. Madeline tried to figure out what had changed so drastically since she’d seen her a little over an hour before.
Unable to hide her concern, she asked, “Do you need anything?”
Kayla grabbed her hands. “I met a man – the man – I cannot live without. I’ll tell you all about it after the show.” The melancholy that had haunted her for weeks had been replaced with happiness that vibrated off her in waves.
“No, you’ll tell me now. Raising the curtain a few minutes late is practically expected for a live performance. Who is it and when the hell did this happen? I just saw you in hair and makeup! We came to the theater together…”
“Okay. Give me a second.”
Tugging her bottom lip between her teeth, Kayla took a long moment to gather her thoughts. Then she confessed about forgetting her lines. Linn was unable to hide her shock since she’d never known her sister to forget a single word.
“I was locked. I mean it. I couldn’t remember anything about my role. I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown.” She inhaled deeply. “Then he helped me…”
“Who?”
Her sister’s eyes sparkled. “Isaiah…it’s Isaiah, Ezra’s brother. Everything I thought, everything my mind seemed fixed on, I was right.”
“You met him at last!�
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Nodding, she squeezed her hands. “He helped me. He’s so achingly beautiful and huge, Linn. Built like a fucking lumberjack.” Shyly, she added, “We had sex.” Linn gasped. “I know it was fast and it makes me look bad but…he wrung more pleasure from me in forty-five minutes than I’ve experienced in all my past relationships combined.”
“Then it doesn’t matter how fast it was and if he thinks badly about you, what does that say about him? That he doesn’t know you well enough yet. You look better than you have in weeks, Kayla. Anything that makes you look and feel the way you do is just fine by me. No judgment.”
“That means a lot. Thanks.” She glanced off in the distance. “I may have to bulldoze him a little bit.” Shaking herself, she put her hands on Linn’s shoulders. “I’ll tell you about that later. Right now, we have to make you famous.”
Kayla wrapped her in a hug. “I don’t know if I’ve told you lately how much I love you and how proud I am of you. I’ll relay all the breathless details later…of which there are many. I have to stop thinking about him for now or I’ll have to ditch my job and go find my dark angel.”
Hand in hand, they dashed toward the stage. The little caterer waved as they passed and Mikayla slid to a stop at her counter. “You look so pretty, Theodora! It smells delicious over here but I wish you could be out front.”
“Honey, I do not know what happened to you but you are practically glowing right now. Go break a leg, Mikayla. I’ll stuff you until you waddle after the show. I always watch the recordings. Here, take water. Knock them dead, ladies!”
Then they were running toward their new futures. A million questions and ideas flooded her mind but Madeline put them all in a box and focused on the task at hand.
There were so many reasons she wanted the show to be a success. The main one involved a dark angel she could call her own.
* * * * *
Several times during their opening performance, Linn wondered if she could hold back her tears at the way it all came together.
Mikayla was outstanding and she had never seen her sister so vibrant and filled with happiness.
Backstage (The Barter System Book 4) Page 15
