by Octavia Kore
The knot of guilt that had found a home in his stomach over a week ago tightened. Clara tried to pull away from him, but his khetis were still swollen. She gasped as he grunted in pain, her hands flying to his stomach to steady herself as he tightened his grip on her thighs.
“Oh, God! I’m sorry! I’m so sorry, I forgot.”
When they’d had a moment to catch their breath, Zaheer looked up at her. The sight of a tear slipping from the corner of her eye to fall onto his stomach undid him. “Ivnalth does not hate you, Clara. She fears the repercussions of what I’ve done.” His throat went dry.
Clara sniffled, swiping at the wet trail the tear had left behind and rubbing her reddened nose. “It makes sense now. I couldn’t understand why she called you selfish when she saw the marks on my wrists.” She sighed heavily, her shoulders sagging as she gazed around the room. “Zaheer—”
He propped himself up on his lower hands and wrapped one of his upper arms around her. Zaheer used his free hand to tip her chin up so that she was forced to look at him. “I said I do not regret you and I meant it. My guardian knew all along, but I was stubborn and refused to see what he could.”
“You said that your people choose their mates and it’s the same for humans. If I’d known what the consequences were, if I’d known that doing this could mean death for others—for you—I wouldn’t have let this happen.”
“Krunkeeli choose, but I don’t think guardians do,” Zaheer grasped her chin in his hand. “Mine knew you in the forest the very first day. He knew you were ours.”
Our tsa, the beast rumbled, content for once.
“What if I don’t want to be your mate?”
The question, spoken so quietly along the bond, slammed into him like a blow to the chest. His female had done more damage with those words than any blade, fang, or claw ever had. They tore him open, leaving a raw, jagged wound. “If… if you do not want to be my mate, then I would let you go.” He swore he would, if that’s what she truly wanted, but he didn’t share what that would mean for him. Losing her would kill him.
Zaheer may not have known much about mating, but he’d been old enough to understand the stories his mother told him. She was a romantic, that much he remembered about her, and she’d told him that losing his father would kill her, not just because she loved him, but because Krunkeeli mates needed each other. They needed to scent their mates, to touch them. Perhaps his mother had exaggerated, but now that he had Clara, Zaheer struggled to imagine a world where she didn’t exist.
Just being away from her during the last week made it obvious that losing her wouldn’t be something he could survive.
“You would just let me go? You would be okay letting me walk away?”
She sounded almost offended, as if he’d somehow managed to anger her with his answer. “Would you rather I hold you captive? Keep you here in the outpost for the rest of your life instead?” The sight of her tear-filled eyes and her frustrated growl only confused him more.
“Of course that isn’t what I want!” Her shoulders shook, and a sob was torn from her throat.
Zaheer stared at his mate, unsure of what he should do. He’d never been in a situation like this before, but he wasn’t Alpha for nothing. Just as he did for the members of his pack, Zaheer projected his calm, stroking her hair and her cheeks. “Explain it to me, Clara. Help me understand.”
“I don’t want you to want me because fate decided that we should be mated. I want to be someone you choose. I want to be someone you love, someone you can’t let go.”
“You are upset that I would honor your wish to leave because you do not want me to let you leave, but you also do not want me to force you to stay? Are all humans so confusing, or is this something unique to you?” Zaheer frowned when Clara buried her face in her hands and laughed.
“There are probably a few human men back on Earth who would tell you it’s me.” Clara ran her fingers along the black stripes on his upper arms. “I just want you to choose me because you care about me. I’ve only ever wanted to be chosen.”
“Clara.” He waited until her eyes rose to meet his. “I don’t know how to make you see that I did choose you. My guardian had no choice in the matter.” He dipped his head to brush his lips over hers before moving to the tip of her nose, and finally her forehead. “I fought against his claims at first. I didn’t want a mate, especially not an outsider. When I saw Maylu touching you… I’d never gone after one of my pack like that, never felt that kind of jealousy. I didn’t realize it then, but I chose you that day and every single day after that.
“I should have given you over to the priests, or I should have allowed someone else to look after you. I chose you over my pack, over my vows, and I’d choose you over my life if it came down to that.”
The swelling in his khetis finally relented, and Zaheer slipped free of her warmth. Their breath mingled as they sighed. His dark seed dripped down her thighs to pool on his pelvis, but neither one of them moved.
“You don’t owe the priests anything,” Clara said as she brought her hands to rest on his shoulders.
He knew that now, but he remained silent. She didn’t need to know that he’d already decided he would destroy Pumo and every single one of his allies. They’d lied and taken advantage of him and so many others for far too long, but that wasn’t what he wanted to think about right now. His mate was in his arms, her warmth pressed against him and his seed filling her. He wanted to enjoy this moment for as long as he could.
“I choose you, Clara. I’ll keep choosing you for as long as the goddess allows, and I’ll never regret a moment of it.”
Chapter 16
Clara
She was going to roast alive in her little nest. Clara was drenched in sweat and she flung the blanket covering her back, kicking her feet to free herself so she could lay sprawled on top of the others. Her poor body felt as if it were burning from the inside out, and the spot where Zaheer’s fangs had pierced her neck throbbed. Sore, overworked muscles protested each movement, and she couldn’t help but smile when she thought about the cause of that. She reached out with one arm, searching for her alien, but the distinct lack of a Zaheer-shaped body in her little nest told Clara he was likely already up for the day.
The ache between her legs had her wincing when she rolled to the side. Zaheer helped clean her up last night, wiping away the dark purple cum that had begun to dry on her skin. She’d giggled at his scowl as he wiped at the mess on his fur, but her mirth had died when she caught sight of the stains on the insides of her thighs. They were like flashing neon lights screaming “we had sex!” to anyone lucky enough to see. Zaheer had grinned, remarking that the color complimented the nearly constant flush of her pale skin.
The soft light of the early morning filtered in through the walls, and Clara scrubbed her hands over her face. She needed to check in with Layla, make sure River hadn’t eaten through anything important while they’d slept, and make her way to the bathroom. Not necessarily in that order. With a resigned sigh, Clara pushed herself up into a sitting position and stretched her arms up above her head.
“I see you’re finally awake.”
The sound of Ivnalth’s voice in her mind made Clara jump. She snatched up the blanket she’d thrown off only moments earlier, covering her bare chest. Clara frowned when her gaze landed on the alien female. Ivnalth sat near the entrance to the treehouse, long legs curled beneath her. The female plucked threads from between her twin tails and passed them up to River, who was perched on her shoulder. The little tahi happily accepted the web, shoving them inside their mouth before reaching slender fingers out for more.
“You scared the hell out of me,” Clara grumbled. “How long have you been here?”
Ivnalth passed River more web and shrugged. “Since Zaheer left.”
“Where did he go?” Clara’s already warm body heated beneath the thick blanket. Assuming she’d been keeping an accurate count, she’d been in the treehouse for almost two weeks and th
e heat had never bothered her like it was now.
“He’s gathering fruit for… break fast. Layla told me this is what you call the morning meal.” Ivnalth’s tails twisted around one another in a way that made Clara think she was nervous about something. She wondered if maybe his cousin was hesitant to be around her because of the things she and Zaheer had spoken about last night.
She wanted to recall her suit to shield herself from the female, but the idea of putting a full-body garment on at the moment sounded miserable. Clara tried fanning herself with the blanket in a desperate attempt to cool down, but it offered little relief. “Is something wrong?” She asked when Ivnalth’s brows drew down over her fuchsia eyes.
“I… I brought you a gift.”
The female who sat before her was so different from the one she’d gotten to know over the last week or so. Aside from that first day, Ivnalth had been cold and entirely unpleasant to be around, but right now she was almost timid. Clara watched as Ivnalth stood, her body rigid, and made her way across the room. In one of her lower hands, the female carried a small bundle of cloth, which she dropped into Clara’s lap unceremoniously before retreating a few steps. Ivnalth sat down a couple feet away, crossing her legs in front of her.
“I asked my aunt to help me create it in honor of your mating.”
In honor of her mating? Clara ran her fingers over the material. It was silky soft and cool to the touch. She held the material up and her throat tightened when it unfurled before her. “You made me a dress?”
“With help,” Ivnalth reminded her. “Lots of help. My aunt made the majority of it, actually.”
“Your aunt is… Zaheer’s mother?”
“She is.”
Clara hugged the garment to her chest and eyed the female. “Why would you do this when it’s painfully obvious that you’re unhappy with Zaheer and I mating?”
“I thought you made our Alpha soft and careless, and it scared me to think about everything he was risking for an outsider.”
That was understandable, wasn’t it? If Clara had known about the punishment Zaheer and his pack could face because of her, she doubted very much that she would have allowed it to progress to this point.
“Zaheer has always been so focused. He’s the one who has all the answers, and seeing him lost like he was after bringing you here was unsettling. I have watched my cousin make many difficult decisions since becoming alpha, but he has never struggled with them the way he has this one,” Ivnalth’s tails wrapped around her calf as she coaxed River onto her hand. “I knew you were different from the moment he decided not to hand you over to Pumo, but I never could have guessed the way you would change all of our lives. I would give anything to have what he’s found with you.”
Clara wasn’t sure what to say to that, but the look on Ivnalth’s face told her that the words had been difficult to say. It was obvious that there was much more to this female than the cold and distant persona she’d been projecting lately. Beads of sweat dripped down Clara’s face and back. She moved the dress to her lap, afraid she might dirty the beautiful gift before even getting the chance to wear it.
“It’s tradition in the Oparian tribe for the families of the newly mated to bring the couple gifts, and since you have no family here, I thought it might be nice for you to have something from us.” River wriggled until Ivnalth placed them on the blanket inside of the basket. The little tahi’s mouth opened wide as they yawned and curled into a ball in the center of the soft blanket.
At least one of us is comfortable, Clara thought, using her forearm to wipe away the sweat. Why was she the only one who seemed to be affected by the sudden heat wave?
“It’s a beautiful dress,” she said, fanning herself with the top portion of the blanket, desperate for any kind of relief. “I can’t believe you went through all that trouble.”
“My aunt makes the most beautiful dresses in our tribe. I can remember sitting in her home with my mother before my ceremony and being fascinated at what she could do with only her webs and dye. When you came back with Tratek yesterday, I noticed that Zaheer’s webs had damaged your clothing, and I…” Ivnalth’s tails curled and uncurled, and her fingers plucked at her fur as if the fact she’d done something nice for Clara made her self-conscious. “I guessed on your measurements.”
“This is probably one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me,” Clara said, wiping at the sweat gathering above her lip. She tried to smile, but her skin felt so tight. What the hell was happening to her?
“Are you all right, lua?”
Just like ‘Aanih’ and ‘tsa’, the word Ivnalth used didn’t have a translation. Clara wondered if they were words from another language, one Layla hadn’t learned, but it was difficult to focus on her curiosity when her body was on fire.
“Is it hot in here? I feel like I’m burning up.”
A jolt of pain shot up Clara’s spine and she gasped, pinching her eyes shut as every muscle in her back spasmed. She felt Ivnalth’s hand on the side of her face, and when she opened her eyes, the female was sitting directly in front of her. Fingers whispered over the bite marks on the side of her neck, and Clara sucked in a breath at the sensation. It wasn’t painful, but the touch startled her.
“Did Zaheer mark you?”
“Yes.” When Ivnalth frowned, Clara pulled away. “Why?”
“You aren’t Krunkeeli,” she said. Her lips thinned, and her eyes narrowed as she shook her head. “I wouldn’t imagine it could—” A shadow fell across the wall a moment before a heavy thud vibrated through the floor of the treehouse.
“Wouldn’t imagine it could… what?”
Ivnalth stood and pursed her lips. “Ask your mate.”
The moment Zaheer stepped through the barrier, Clara felt the weight of his gaze fall on her. A wicked smirk curved his lips, and despite the fact that his cousin still stood between them, Clara felt her overheated body stir with desire.
Calm down, girl. We’re practically swimming in a puddle of our own sweat at the moment.
This spider-like, four-armed, web-spinning alien covered in fur wasn’t the human man young, idealistic Clara had dreamed of one day falling in love with. In truth, he was more likely to have been the monster she feared under her bed, but when she looked at him now, standing at the entrance to this strange treehouse with an armful of fruit, those double tails swishing back and forth, Clara knew no human man would ever compare.
“Alpha.” Ivnalth inclined her head, sending Clara one more curious look before dismissing herself and stepping through the barrier.
“I was hoping to make it back in time to wake you up myself.” The implication in his voice was clear. He’d asked if he could ‘wake her with pleasure’ the night before, and while she’d wanted that at the time, Clara was glad he had missed his opportunity that morning.
“Not quite fast enough.” Her lips stretched over her teeth, but it didn’t feel like the smile she’d been trying for. With trembling hands, Clara folded the silky dress and placed it on the lid of one of the baskets. “How’s Tratek?”
“Still sleeping, but his wounds are beginning to heal.” Zaheer set the fruit down in front of her before leaning in to press his lips to her forehead. He jerked back almost immediately, his eyes narrowing on Clara’s face before he reached out and snatched the blanket away.
“Hey!” Clara gasped as his hands moved over her, pressing and probing as he searched for something unknown. She found herself bent forward as Zaheer trailed his fingers up her spine, flinging her braid out of his way before righting her.
“Are you feeling well?” His large upper hands cupped her face, and the frown tugging at his mouth deepened. “Why were you covered in furs if you were like this? Did you wake up this way? How long has it been?”
“Wait!” Clara swatted his many hands away from her body. “You’re scaring me. What’s going on?” She pressed her hand into his chest and was surprised at how cool his fur was.
“It’s strange. You
aren’t Krunkeeli.”
“Right, you and Ivnalth have both said that this morning, but I don’t understand what that has to do with me being so damn hot all of a sudden.” How was he so cool when she was burning up just sitting there? Clara ran her hands up to his shoulders and inched closer.
Zaheer pulled her into his chest and she sighed as his arms banded around her back, encompassing her. The tightness in her chest relaxed and her skin cooled a fraction, just enough for her head to clear. It was akin to the sensation of jumping into the lake during those blistering summer days at camp.
“You should eat something.” One of Zaheer’s hands passed over her back, and she arched into him, loving the cold trail it left on her skin. “You’ll need your energy for what’s to come.”
For what’s to come? That wasn’t ominous at all.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Clara leaned her head back to look up at him, but his attention was elsewhere. Her mate was frowning at something off to the side, his mouth moving as he spoke aloud. Inside the basket where Ivnalth had placed them, River had woken up and was attempting to gum through the dried reeds that made up the rim. Tapping on the floor to get the little tahi’s attention, Clara signed ‘no’ before leaning over to pluck River from the basket. “You just ate. Stop destroying your home.”
“What was it that you did with your hands? Layla used them with you before.” Zaheer set her back in her nest, and she recoiled as the sweat-covered furs touched her. He selected one of the fruits he’d brought, breaking it in half with a twist of his wrists before handing it to her.
She knew a distraction when she saw one. He hadn’t answered her question about his cryptic words, but she’d get back to that. “It’s sign language, American sign language to be specific.”
“This language is not something my webs taught me.” Zaheer reached out as he sat down, pulling her into his lap and turning her so that her back was pressed into his chest.
River clambered up into her braid and Clara felt herself relax against her mate as she began to eat. “Maybe it’s because it’s not a spoken language? ASL is hand movements, facial expressions, posturing… there’s nothing verbal.”
