by Jeff Gunzel
Moving steadily but hardly realizing it, everything felt a dream. Part of her wished it was a dream, a sick, twisted dream she would wake up from any minute now. Yes, that’s how this was supposed to go. Then she would shake it off and go have breakfast with her friends. She would tell them all about it, and they would all laugh at the absurdity of her dream.
Owen would undoubtedly make fun of her, laughing while bits of food flung across the table through the gaps in his teeth. Liam would try to analyze her dream, but eventually take it so far that he would end up talking primarily to himself.
Xavier would comfort her, assuring her that everything was going to be alright. He always did that. And she would believe him just like she always did. His assuring smile would work its magic, and she would know that everything was just fine.
But it’s not fine, Xavier... It’s not fine.
Down the winding steps she went, ignoring the calls from above urging her to wait. It was hard to say why she ignored their pleas. Even she didn’t know where she was going. By the time she reached the bottom step, her prize was beginning to groan, fingers clawing along the floor in a halfhearted attempt to resist being dragged.
After a subtle entrance, Viola found herself marching through the training room. Engaged in conversation, or training one-on-one in various spaces around the room, the lerwicks hardly even seemed to notice her at first. One by one heads started to turn. Spoken conversations quickly became hissing whispers and finger pointing. The clanging of swordplay stopped altogether, and within seconds the room was silent.
The only sound now was the crunching of the floor mat under Viola’s feet, and the raspy, staticky sound of what appeared to be a bloody, dead body being dragged behind her. She stopped at the head of the room and turned around, dropping the body at her feet. Lerwicks stared at their leader, having no idea what to make of this scene.
“We have discovered a spy among us,” she said, her seething stare flickering down at her feet. “An assassin to be exact, one who was sent here by none other than my own brother.” She glanced up at the tall figure entering the room just then. Liam was supposed to be working on Bella’s notes, but he had undoubtedly heard the quickly spreading news and had come to see for himself. Viola was sorry for that. She didn’t necessarily want him to see what she was about to do.
“And her mission was to kill me.” She placed her foot on the back of the assassin’s neck, then leaned down so only she could hear. “Isn’t that right?” she whispered, increasing the pressure so that the assassin began to cough and gag. Fully awake now, she actually seemed scared for the first time. “I hope you understand that a price must be paid.
“And although the attempt has failed, it has proven one thing to me,” Viola said, standing up straight again. “It means that our enemies are worried. They fear us and what we’ve built here. That is good as far as I’m concerned. But it also means we must be careful moving forward. This one here walked among us freely for some time before I caught onto her.”
Viola reached down and brushed her quivering cheek with the backs of her fingertips, then looked up as she scanned the room. “If there are any more of you here, then I want you to bear witness to the future that awaits you. Because sooner or later, I will find you. And when I do, your fate shall be no different than hers.”
“Wait... Wait,” the girl rasped, coughing blood into the palm of her hand. “You don’t have to do this.” It was strange watching the assassin grovel for her life. “I can still be useful. If you let me go, I can deliver a message for you.”
Viola yanked her head back by the hair. “Your head in a box will send the intended message just fine.” Quick and efficient, Viola’s flesh blade slipped straight through the front of her neck. Watching the room, scanning, Viola evaluated everyone’s expression as best as she could. Her hope was to flush out any other spies who might be present, believing the looks on their faces just might give them away.
But it was no use. Nearly everyone present had the same stunned look on their face, and more than one stomach emptied right there on the spot. Even the most composed of them had to look away, and no one could look her in the eye after that.
Did I go too far? But what choice did I have?
With her frightened expression looking exactly the same, Viola pushed down the corpse and stood up tall. “If there are any more of you,” she paused, her eyes making one last measured sweep across the room, “know that I will find you. And when I do, your deaths will not be as quick and painless as this. A monumental example will be made next time, so I offer one last piece of advice for any spies here secretly working for Jarlen.
“Run...
“Flee this very night and go crawling back to your master like the worms you are. Yes, he may execute you upon your return for not completing your mission, but that is a mercy compared to what I will do. So from where I’m standing, it seems you have nothing to lose. So crawl back like a stray dog, there is nothing for you here.”
After rolling the corpse onto its back with her foot, Viola stalked away. Lerwicks parted to each side, moving quickly to get out of her way. She needed some air, some space. Heck, she just needed to be anywhere but here. But as the last lerwicks moved aside, she saw both Rishima and Bella blocking her path. How long had they been here? How much had they seen?
“You will come to my chambers within the hour,” Rishima ordered as Viola slipped past.
“Fine. Just make sure you send that back to my brother,” Viola said, fingers flicking toward the body.
“Viola!” Viola stopped, then slowly turned back. “It will be done,” Rishima assured her in a softer tone. Two spiritists were already moving to clean up the mess. “Please, don’t keep me waiting too long. It is urgent that we speak.” Viola nodded, then made her way toward the door.
But it wasn’t done just yet. She knew the towering figure standing near the door was going to have his say as well. When she tried to walk past, Liam pressed a firm hand against her chest.
“You said you would not interfere,” Viola reminded him, eyes straight ahead as she longed to leave this room.
“Yes, with your training methods,” Liam said, his stare appearing to find great interest in the far wall for some reason. Finally, he did look down on her. “But not in your personal life.” Tired, worn, the old man was starting to look worse for wear these days. They all were. These were trying times, and it was getting harder for everyone to hold it together. “I don’t think I like what I’m seeing, Viola. I am concerned about you.”
“Well don’t be, I’m fine!” she lied.
“You are the farthest thing from fine!”
Liam’s expression softened. “I know you did what you thought you had to.” He gestured toward the body being placed on a cart. “An example had to be made. This is war, and only the strong will get through it as the weak get devoured. You think I don’t already know that?
“But I am begging you, please do not get lost in this world of violence. I know things have changed, but you must not lose yourself or you will never be the same. And no, I will never stop worrying about you, no matter what you say. If that is what you wish, then you might as well banish me from the tower right now. For that is the only way you will rid yourself of this burdensome old man.” Viola looked away. They both knew she would never take such drastic measures. “But until that day comes, I will be at your side whether you like it or not.” Having said his peace, he removed his hand and let her pass.
Insides swirling with emotion, Viola hardly remembered the walk back to her room. It was as if she somehow just appeared there. She looked down at her hands, filthy with flaked dry blood. Had she really been walking around looking like this? But what did it matter? After all, nearly everyone saw her kill that assassin with her bare hands. As for the few who didn’t, they would hear plenty of exaggerated stories soon enough.
She stepped over to the basin and dipped her hands in the cool water. Coagulated blood began to thin and drift off,
clouding the water as she scrubbed it away. Cupping her hands, she closed her eyes and splashed a bit more up on her face. She didn’t care that the water was bloody, it was the last thing on her mind. She paused a moment, cheeks drawn from the cool wetness.
Suddenly, her body lurched forward, hands coming down to grip the side of the basin. The water rippled beneath her as her stomach emptied. Fingernails scratching the sides of the porcelain, she heaved a second time, a third... She swore all her insides were going to end up in the basin as her body jolted again and again.
When the violent wave of sickness finally subsided, she slid down to her knees and began to sob. Her numbness was gone, and the mental walls holding in all her emotions came crashing down. Throwing her head back, she wailed, an echoing shriek that seemed to come from everywhere at once.
It was all too much to take. The burden of leading these lerwicks was crushing down on her like a mountain. How much more would be asked of her?
Again... Again she had taken a life in cold blood. Would she ever get used to this? Was she supposed to get used to it? The violence, the suffering, was this really all there was to the world now? If so, then what was the point? Why bother trying to save the realm when there was nothing left worth saving? Let the ghatins have this forsaken world, she wanted no part of it anymore!
Feeling some strength coming back, she pushed herself back up. Looking into the frosted mirror that hung over the basin, she gave it a wipe to see her reflection. Her eyes were bloodshot and her cheeks were sunk in. When was the last time she had slept properly?
“I can’t do this alone,” she whispered back to her reflection. “Where are you, Xavier?”
“Xavier is no longer with you,” her reflection whispered back. Viola froze, unable to move as a cold shiver rattled down through her chest. Raising her hand, she touched the space just below her left eye, yet her reflection didn’t move. “Besides, this task has fallen to you, not to him. You must find a way, Viola. You must find a way.”
“It’s you,” Viola gasped, recognizing the vision from her past. The reflection was that of her former self, at least, of how she perceived her formal self to look and act. “You told me to release you, so I did,” Viola accused. The reflection nodded, her wide, innocent smile like that of an adolescent girl. “So why then have you come back to haunt me?”
“Haunt you?” her reflection repeated, tilting her head curiously. She almost looked hurt by the accusation. “Did you not just say you cannot do this alone?”
“Then you’ve come back to help me?” The reflection sunk back into the mirror, chin pressed down into her neck as she shook her head with a shy grin. “Why then?” Viola growled. “Why come back to me now?”
“I did not come to you, for you are the one who summoned me,” her reflection said, wide-eyed and suddenly quite eager. “I did not choose to be here, but that does not mean I can’t see your troubles for what they are. Do you not understand why you feel so all alone?” Her hand drifted out from the mirror, her hand steaming with ghostly white vapor. Spidery fingers uncoiled and pointed toward the door. “Because you told them to stay away.”
“That’s not tru—”
“Of course it is. Those who would try to help you have been cast aside. Your friends have reminded you over and over again that you are not alone, yet you continue to convince yourself that you are. When I told you to release me, I meant all of me. You cannot cling to any portion of our former life, for it has no place in the present. We lived a life of solitude, you and me. We had no one to help us, to guide us through life, but that is no longer true.”
“I understand,” Viola said, stepping closer to the mirror. Whether this conjured image was real, or just a product of a slowly breaking mind, she would never know for sure. Regardless, she recognized the wisdom in its words. It spoke the truth. Or at the very least, it had pulled the truth she already knew from the back of her own mind.
“Accept the help from those who care about you,” her reflection said as it began to fade, her clothes and skin becoming translucent. Her voice too began to fade, an echo-like whisper from far away. “You cannot do this alone.” The reflection faded away.
*
The spiritist opened the door, then dipped his head and stepped aside. Viola nodded her acknowledgment before stepping past him. The others were all seated around the table waiting for her. She sighed, knowing she should have suspected this. Apparently, this was going to be an intervention of some sort.
“Come, sit,” Rishima urged, rising from her seat. She gestured to an empty chair across from her, her smile forced but still pleasant enough. Sitting down, Viola looked at Liam, Hamas, Salina, and Bella each in turn. “I...we...need to speak with you,” Rishima began, appearing uncharacteristically nervous. “I thought it might be best if the others joined us as well. We...we think that...perhaps...it would be best if…”
“Viola,” Liam cut in, seeing that Rishima was struggling with the touchy subject. She was a fine leader to her own people, but wasn’t all that proficient in dealing with such personal matters one-on-one. “I’m going to be straightforward with you, just like I’ve always been. You cannot go on like this, and now I’m afraid we must put an end to it. You cannot—”
“I cannot do this alone,” Viola mercifully finished for him. He closed his mouth, then nodded after a few seconds. A certain relief seemed to wash over the room as the nervous tension sifted away. “I know this now, and you’re right. All of you.” Her smile was infectious, and seemed to suddenly be worn by everyone.
“I’ve been a fool.” It felt good to admit that as she waved away Liam’s attempt to downplay her self-criticism. Someone needed to say it, so it might as well be her. “And it’s high time I faced that fact and did something about it.
“But first, I owe each of you an apology. All you’ve done is try to help me even while I kept pushing you away. Our shared goal is so much bigger than that, and it was arrogant of me to try to take this burden on alone. I need help, the same help you’ve been offering since the very beginning.
“My friends, we are all in this together, and I’m sorry it took me this long to see reason. Please forgive me, and let’s finish what we started together.”
After a lengthy bout of relieved hugs, parchments and ink bottles were quickly set up around the table. Maybe Viola was in charge of training the lerwicks, but there were many other moving parts at play here. The spiritists had a part to play, as well as the humans. They were all in this together, and it was time to devise some plans that would include all their resources and talents.
Hamas and Liam excused themselves, knowing there would be plenty of time for them to get involved in battle strategies later on. For now they had a different task to deal with, one that only their minds were equipped to handle. Predicting the ghatins’ next move would not be an easy task, but it was the one assigned to them. It was time to get back to it.
Chapter 11
Eyes closed, body relaxed, Xavier tried to focus on his breathing. Back straight, hands on his knees while sitting on the chair, he visualized his lungs expanding with each deep breath. His shoulders rose as he took in the steamy jungle air, then lowered slowly as his lungs deflated for what felt like the hundredth time.
“Are you sure about this?” he muttered under his breath, resisting the urge to open one eye.
“Shh...concentrate,” Aurabelle scolded, moving her face up close to his to make sure his eyes were still closed. Satisfied, she went back to circling his chair while observing his progress. “You must be in the right state of mind before you can learn to control the gift.”
“And what state is that?”
“Shhhh!” she scolded again, growing irritated by his constant lapses in focus. “You’re as easily distracted as a twelve-year-old.” Rolling her eyes, she circled around to the back of his chair. “Focus on your breathing. It’s alright if your mind wanders from time to time, just as long as you resume your concentration. And when I speak, all I wan
t you to do is listen.”
“Fine.”
“Shh! Stop answering me.”
Xavier let out an annoyed grunt, but continued his breathing drills just as instructed. He was no stranger to meditation, yet this time was a struggle. It was really hard to stay focused when he wasn’t really sure how any of this was going to help. He needed to learn to control this monster inside him, and all this felt like a strange place to start.
“We can’t get started until you’ve mastered this phase,” Aurabelle warned, sensing his impatience. “You must be in the proper state of mind, or things could go terribly wrong.”
“What things? What might go wrong?” Alarmed, Xavier hopped right out of his seat. Aurabelle threw her hands in the air and cursed at the sky. Hours wasted, and now they would have to start all over again.
“You really don’t understand, do you?” she said, turning on him suddenly as if she was going to strike him. The look in her eyes was beyond irritation, bordering on rage. “You seem to think that controlling the gift is some simple process that can be perfected in a day. Perhaps I’ll utter a few magic words, then send you on your way?”
She slapped a hand to her forehead, looking as if she might start screaming at any moment. “Have I overestimated you?” she groaned. She threw her hands up and looked to the sky again. “Xylia, of all the heroes in this realm, you had to choose him?! He is not worthy of the gift! How can this simpleton possibly be my equal?” Xavier stormed up to her, but Aurabelle held her ground. It had already been pretty well established that Xavier could not hurt her. Still, he looked ready to try again.
“You make it sound like I haven’t held up my end of the bargain,” he growled, his own anger now matching hers. “But you seem to forget, there was no damn bargain! I didn’t choose this.”
“But you didn’t resist it either.”
