by Jessica Sims
But I wanted to see Josh, too, and share my excitement with him. I gave the bed another longing look, then glanced at Sara. “You’ll wake me up when Josh gets here?”
She nodded and shut the door, leaving me alone with the bed. I stared at it for a long minute. Please don’t let this all be one massive and incredibly cruel hallucination.
I slid into the center of the bed, nestling my head in the pillows and snuggling deep. Could I fall asleep again? My body was tense, as if I didn’t quite believe it yet. What if it was just false hope?
But even as I worried, my eyes drooped closed and I fell back to sleep.
• • •
I woke up at dawn and felt incredible.
I was going to live. Glory fucking hallelujah, I was going to live! I danced flat on my back in the bed, grinning like a fool. And it was all thanks to Josh. Beautiful, wonderful, thoughtful Josh. I wept with joy as I dressed.
I was giddy with excitement, and for the first time in months I felt strong and healthy and powerful. I didn’t even mind the were-cougar part. Turning into a cat would take some getting used to, but I’d have Josh on my side.
I wasn’t looking forward to exile, but I pictured cozying up in a snowy cabin with Josh at my side, huddled under the blankets, and decided that it might be fun. Everything seemed like fun now.
I left the bedroom and went downstairs, my stomach growling loudly. Either I was starving or this, too, was amplified in my new state. Probably both. I found Sara in the kitchen, setting two plates at the table near an enormous stack of pancakes. At the sight of her, I was so overcome with giddiness that I enveloped her in a hug.
She stiffened at my touch, then relaxed. “I take it we had a good morning?”
“I feel amazing,” I told her, unable to stop smiling. “I’m so happy I could burst.” My stomach growled and I slapped a hand to it in embarrassment. “I might also be hungry.”
She laughed and gestured at the table. “I thought you might be, so I made breakfast. No meat, though. You might want to ease off on that for the next few weeks until you get used to controlling your shifting. The predator in you gets excited by meat, and your animal side’s harder to control when you’re hungry.”
I nodded as I sat down, soaking in the information. The pile of pancakes looked so good that I stabbed one with a fork and ate it whole, no syrup. I needed something in my stomach now.
Sara ignored my bad manners, pouring two cups of coffee and moving back to the table.
I glanced around. No scents of anyone but Sara and me. No Ramsey. No Ellis or Everett. No Lily. And no Josh. I missed him. “So where is everyone?” I asked between bites.
“Giving us some space,” she said cheerfully. “A new shifter is under a lot of strain, and the others thought it might be best to keep your exposure to a minimum while you adjust.”
“Is Lily okay? I can’t see her going with the others willingly.”
She grimaced. “Well. Lily is a problem. She’s human, but she’s seen too much for them to just send her home. The first night you were here and unconscious, Lily bolted. The twins gathered her up again. She’s now being kept in a safe location until the Alliance decides what to do with her. They’re meeting with the vampires this week to discuss ‘the incident.’ ” She made air quotes.
“Apparently the vampires didn’t believe the story until Josh pointed out that Andre had been keeping Lily captive for quite some time. Now they’re bending over backward to try to smooth things over, but Beau’s people are furious and questioning everything. As they should. It seems like this isn’t the first incident with that vampire, and now the Alliance wants stricter guidelines for vampire interaction. There’s talk of setting up a permanent liaison, which means that the dating agency would have to work with them.” She grimaced.
I grinned. “Not my problem, now that I’m fired. And turned!”
“Yes, you are,” she said with a small laugh. “And I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it pretty quickly.”
And she’d given up her time to teach me the ropes. I thought of her mate, Ramsey, and how they seemed to constantly touch when they were together, and I said, “I’m sorry. This must be a big chore.”
She shook her head and reached over to pat my hand. “Not at all. I had no help when I was newly turned, and I’m happy to be of assistance. Ramsey is patient. He knows I’ll be back.” A smile curved her face. “I gave him homework. He needs to improve his PvP skills in WoW, or else I’m going to totally school him the next time we play. And he’s not a good loser.”
I had no idea what that was, but it sounded like they enjoyed it. As she chatted about shooters and techniques, I ate methodically. When she got up to bring over more coffee, I noticed a massive, dark red mark at the base of her neck. I tried not to stare at it, but I couldn’t help but ask, “What happened to your neck?”
She blushed bright red and clapped a hand over the mark. “Um. So that’s probably new to you. It’s a mate mark,” she said with a hint of pride. “A man gives it to his mate when he wants to claim her before all others.”
My eyes widened. I had forgotten about my mate mark. I got up and went into the bathroom, suddenly curious to see it on my own neck.
I paused at the sight of my reflection in the mirror. I looked tired, but not as hollow and wasted as before. The hunted look in my eyes was gone. I touched my hair. It was shiny for the first time in weeks, instead of dry and flat. Huh. My gaze dropped to my neck, and I brushed my hair back.
There, just below my ear, was a single reddish mark on my neck, like the world’s largest hickey. How was it that only shifters could see this? That didn’t make sense . . . but then again, neither did turning into a cat. I thought of Josh’s mouth on my neck as he’d kissed and nipped at me, and my body flushed.
Suddenly I wanted to tell him how much I loved him, to share my utter joy at being cured. He’d saved me.
I rushed out of the bathroom and almost smacked back into Sara, who had followed me. “Can I see Josh now? I want to talk to him.”
She bit her lip. “There’s a bit of a problem . . . He’s been arrested for turning a human. And it’s not looking good for him.”
“But he changed me to save my life,” I pointed out, even though I’d expected repercussions.
“The reason behind it doesn’t matter,” she said gently. “All the other alphas can see is that a Russell broke the rules, and Beau’s backed into a corner. He can’t let his brother get off scot-free while throwing down the hammer on anyone else who changes a human. It’s just really bad timing. It just looks like the Alliance playboy decided to take a human playmate.”
“That’s not it at all!”
“Unfortunately, Josh refuses to discuss any of it.”
I sighed. “Well, he’s not going into exile alone. I’m going with him.”
She stared at me. “Marie. This is far worse than that. Josh deliberately flouted the rules set out by his own brother, so this is huge. He’s going to be made an example to others. We’re talking permanently exiled from the Alliance, which would make him fair game for any Alliance member. He’d be completely unprotected—anyone could attack him without repercussion.”
I swallowed hard.
Chapter Seventeen
It was three long, horrible weeks before the Alliance tribunal met at City Hall.
While we waited, I was kept under lock and key at the Russell house. Though only Sara and I were there, I could smell another shifter in the air the few times I was allowed out onto the grounds. We were being watched, even if it wasn’t overt.
I wasn’t allowed to go back to my apartment, so my father was allowed to occasionally visit me. Beau and the other Russells were carefully watching him, but I knew he would keep the secret. He didn’t have to be told.
Sara told me that if anyone asked, I was to say that Lily and I had been alone that night, and that we’d dragged Josh to the Russells’ without assistance. Lily was being kept at a secure location separa
te from me, and I knew she had to be frightened.
Sara was my shadow the entire time I stayed at the Russell house, always there with a helpful word. I shifted a few more times in the three weeks, each one messy and painful, but she assured me that was normal until my body adjusted. Shifting rarely pained her any longer, and she shared tips on easing into the process. When we made it to the woods she ran alongside me, her dog nipping at my cat’s heels. It was good to not feel alone, and I was grateful to have her at my side.
I’d have rather had Josh, of course; I missed him terribly. He was the last thing I thought of when I went to sleep, and the first when I woke up. Was he safe? Was he under the same lockdown I was?
Would someone really kill him just for turning me? It seemed ridiculous, yet Sara was quite grave.
I refused to accept the possibility. There had to be a way to reason with them.
• • •
As I entered the small courtroom in Little Paradise, I stared at the seated council. Every face there was stony and stern, and every member glared at me. I clung to Sara’s arm as she led me forward, soothing me with low murmurs. There would be no reasoning with them, I realized with dread.
I recognized some of the council members from the agency. The two werewolves at the end of the row were Alice and Jackson. There was an angry-looking man named Declan, who, I seemed to recall, was a were-lynx (and not a popular one). The leader of the were-tiger clan, Vic, as stern and fierce as ever. An older man I didn’t recognize, who likely didn’t use the dating service. The biggest clans in the area would be represented, and I mentally paired up the unknowns. Were-badger. Were-lion. Another man who smelled like a wolf, two others who smelled like cats that I couldn’t identify, and one who I was pretty sure was a were-otter. All of the local alphas.
At the end of the long row of leaders was Beau, shuffling paperwork. He was dressed in a gray suit and tie, and his mouth was pinched and unhappy. Bath sat in the audience, her long blond ponytail wrapped around her hand as she anxiously watched her husband.
Sara nudged me toward a chair at the center of the room and I swallowed hard, my muscles leaping and tightening in alarm. I fought back the sensation, hoping I wouldn’t go into a surprise-shift. That would be really bad.
I sat down in the chair and looked around at the sea of faces, but Josh was nowhere. My heart hammered in my breast.
Beau cleared his throat, then his piercing gaze scanned me impassively. “Thank you for joining us, Marie. I see that you are well. Have you had any problems with shifting after the first attempt?”
I shook my head, my throat dry. “I’m okay, thank you.”
His gaze shifted to Sara, hovering over my shoulder. “How many times has she shifted since turning?”
“Four,” Sara said, her voice small in the room. “Each time was successful, with no problems. She should be fine with practice.”
He nodded and glanced down the row. “Let the tribunal record that the turning has taken successfully.” He looked back to me and gave another crisp nod. “You may take a seat in the audience, Marie.”
Confused, I stood up. “Do you want to ask me anything else?”
“You’re not on trial,” he said, his voice neutral. “Please have a seat.”
I gave Sara a questioning look, but she only pressed a hand to my back and nudged me toward Bathsheba, and I sat between the two sisters. Bath smiled nervously at me, tugging at her long ponytail. Her scent was a mixture of human and cougar, and I noticed her neck was covered in mate marks.
Strange how these things were so obvious now.
“Let’s bring in Joshua Russell,” Beau said, his voice flat and emotionless.
My heart fluttered. I craned my head, desperate to see him. To catch a whiff of his scent. He appeared in the doorway a minute later, dressed in a plain black T-shirt and jeans. His hands were braced in front of him, handcuffed. My pulse spiked at that, and at the unshaven stubble on his jaw. A scowling Ramsey lurked a few steps behind.
Josh scanned the room as soon as he entered, and I held my breath until he found me. His dark eyes widened a fraction, that intense, possessive look came over his face, and his mouth curled in a hint of a smile.
Tears pricked my eyes. “I love you,” I mouthed at him.
His smile curved a little more.
Ramsey gave him a bit of a shove, directing him toward the chair in the center of the room.
Someone in the row of alphas got to his feet, and I looked to see it was Vic, the were-tiger leader. He crossed his big arms over his chest and scowled at Josh, who lounged in the wooden chair as if this had all been no big deal.
Vic glared down at him. “The council has met to determine what to do in regards to your situation. Given that your brother is the leader of the Alliance, he has asked that you not be given special consideration because of his position. To do so would undermine his status as an impartial leader.”
Josh gave a jerky nod, as if he’d expected this.
Beau’s face was tight, the edges of his mouth strained and pale. He was upset, and trying very hard not to show it.
“The council has met and discussed this for several days. We have weighed the evidence, and before we pass sentencing, we want to know one thing.” His hard gaze leveled on Josh. “After all that has happened recently, we want to know why.”
I held my breath.
Josh said . . . nothing. I couldn’t see his expression, only part of his back, and I became intensely frustrated. What was he waiting for? Deciding whether to speak? Thinking his answer through?
“Because I love her,” Josh said after a long moment, and my heart clenched.
“That’s not enough,” said Declan furiously. “Just because you think with your dick doesn’t mean you let it make the decisions for you.”
“Quiet,” Beau said in a lethal voice. “Vic has the floor.”
The were-lynx leader’s mouth thinned, and he went silent.
The were-tiger alpha glared at the row, and then turned back to Josh. “No other reason?”
After a long moment, Josh added, “She was dying. I wanted to save her.”
“Humans die every day,” the lone female alpha—Alice—said. “Supernaturals, too. It is a part of life. We can’t go around saving everyone.”
“I didn’t want to save everyone,” Josh ground out. “Just the woman I love.”
“Did she ask you to turn her?”
“No,” Josh said flatly. “She refused me. I insisted. When she wouldn’t listen, I overpowered her.”
I frowned at that. He was making himself sound like he was the one to blame for this. It was my fault—all of it was.
“So you coerced a human female into your bed, and when you found out she was dying, you decided to turn her? You let her into a secret, private Alliance without consulting anyone else?”
“I did,” Josh said in a clipped tone.
What? “Wait,” I blurted, getting to my feet.
Seven alphas scowled at me, the force of their displeasure so great that I staggered backward. I felt this odd compulsion to shrink back, as if desperate to please them. For some reason, their approval was important to me.
“We did not call on you,” Vic began.
I forced the quiver in my stomach aside. This was no time to let my shifter hormones rule things. I shoved my hand into my purse, fishing out my wallet. Then I flipped it open and grabbed my Alliance ID card, walking to the center of the floor with the card raised. “I’m already Alliance. This ID says so.”
“She’s right,” Beau said quietly. “She’s been working at the agency for over a year now. That should be a consideration in this case.”
“So what are we supposed to do?” Declan declared. “Just ignore the precedent that’s been set? Run around turning human women just because we feel like it? Dilute the gene pool?”
A low snarl rumbled in Beau’s throat. “My mate is human. Watch your tongue.”
Alice raised her hands. “I want to
know why it’s so bad that she’s been turned.”
All eyes turned to her, and several withering scowls were now directed at her. I wanted to kiss the woman in gratitude. I edged closer to Josh, waiting for Ramsey to push us apart, but he didn’t—so I laid my hand on Josh’s shoulder.
He tilted his head and nuzzled my hand, letting me know he loved me. I felt a surge of love in response.
“We can’t just go changing humans when we please,” Declan snarled in her face.
The wolf alpha at her side—Jackson—got to his feet and frowned at the man snarling at his mate. Alice put a hand up, calming him. “The problem with shifters is that we don’t have enough women to go around, right? Why can’t we be sensible about this? My pack was recently under attack for the simple reason that we have females and the other one did not. Power struggles over women in packs is not something new. Wasn’t there a recent problem with another wolf pack and a female?”
All eyes in the room suddenly moved to Sara.
“There was,” Beau admitted, his tone guarded.
“So why are we following their bad example?” Alice asked. “What’s so terrible about turning someone if it’s in a controlled, measured environment? Why can’t someone be turned if they are vetted and double-checked? Does it matter if there’s one more were-cougar? It’s not as if we’re fighting for game. We have supermarkets for that sort of thing.”
Declan snarled, the sound feral and ugly. “What about that tiger boy? What happened there—”
“Wasn’t controlled,” Vic pointed out. “He didn’t have my permission or the girl’s. With both of those in place, I wouldn’t have a problem with it.”
“Nor I,” said Jackson.
“Nor I,” said another.
The lynx alpha shook his head viciously. “And what happens if our secret gets out? What happens if someone is turned and they go straight to the papers? Straight to the internet?”
“We’re not saying that things have to be changed overnight,” Alice said, her tone calm and unruffled. “We’re saying that we take control of things in a sensible manner. Do you think your clan members would go sneaking off turning someone if they knew all they had to do is talk to their alpha and have a few background checks run?”
