by Lis, Heidi
The next couple of years is much the same, I saw him whenever and when I did; he took what he wanted. It did not matter. If I was dating someone or not, he wanted me, so he had me.
Like most things in life, all good things come to an end. My personal favorite, the old saying ‘if it’s too good to be true’ yeah, that one should have been a big red flag for me. But no, common sense did not come into play when it came to Dominic.
I learned over time in the years to come that Dominic was seriously into some dark shit. He was involved with a local gang, and it was his way or the highway. I tried to take the highway, but the funny thing is, there was no escaping him. Dominic possessed what he wanted, and it would be his decision to end things if he wanted. I wanted to stop things, but he did not feel the same. I was to obey, to submit; to give it all to him.
I never realized he was grooming me. He took a young naive girl and shaped her into a person she hardly recognized. My once hot hookup saw me as nothing but a warm body for him to abuse how he saw fit.
Izzy no longer existed; the only thing, that remained, was a shell of a girl I used to be. Kara knew enough to keep her shit intact; she knew what would happen to me if she didn’t. It came to a point where Kara and Dominic were like strangers to each other. She hated him and wanted me to be free of him, but she also knew there was not a fucking thing she could do about it. It killed her, and her guilt over how we hooked up that night years before, was my death sentence.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and whips excite me...yeah, that should be Dominic’s motto. I learned more than I wanted from him, escaping him, took me a long time of waiting for just the right moment. I found my chance, and I took it. Leaving everything all behind, my family, who had grown to hate me over some bullshit, was the least of my concerns. Being the family disappointment was one thing, but dying at the hands of Dominic was a whole lot worse. He was the monster I needed to get away from. I could never go far enough, but Seattle seemed like an excellent start.
One night, I did something unspeakable; I took off. With Kara’s help I did it; I took control for once and ran.
WAKING UP, I EXPECTED to find a sexy body next to me, but instead my hand felt around and there was nothing but a cold bed. My hand kept reaching and feeling out for a hand, a leg but nothing. Just my luck; sitting up wiping the sleep from my eyes, I look around and moan in frustration. Reliving our conversation, last night has left me feeling bare. I did not hold anything back from him either, at least not before I couldn’t take anymore and I nodded off to sleep. I vaguely remember him holding me as we talked about Kara, but mostly it has been about Dominic. Dominic this and Dominic that. I did, however, keep one secret from him; it was just too personal, and I still haven’t fully recovered from it myself. When and if he ever finds out, he would need to understand my feelings.
Shivers run down my spine just thinking about my past. To think I was telling my worst nightmare stories to Braxton, it makes me sick to my stomach. A man I just met; a man I like; a man I am trying to impress. Ugh; why can’t I ever learn just to shut my mouth? My mind is still somewhat foggy, as I’m not sure how much I’ve even said to him about that sick bastard. Rubbing my forehead in disgust, it most likely is the reason he is not in bed with me this morning. There’s nothing like running him off, Iz; great. What a way to have him running for the hills, and then to tell him about your sordid past.
Showering and dressed for the day, I am cleaning when a soft knock at my door catches my attention. Opening it, I see the sweet little face I have grown to love, Eve dressed like a biker chick; she is going to grow up to be one I am confident about that. She has on a t-shirt, jeans and knee high flat black boots. The girl is so damn cute, going to be a knockout when she is older. The thought of Braxton keeping the boys away brings a smile to my face. Looking at her it is easy to see her mother; she looks a lot like her, her blonde hair with long natural curls. Eve is tall and slender for a young girl; she is beautiful, stunning even. To make her even more likable, she is sweet as sugar.
“Hey honey, what are you doing looking so cute today?” I can’t hide my smile from her; she just brightens up my damn day. Not something she gets from her mother, yep, she definitely got it all from her dad. Dimples and all; boy oh boy.
Twirling her hair with her hand, she smiles and tilts her head to the side.
“I was missing you, and I just took off to come and see you.” I could sense she was not telling me something.
“Hey,” I use my finger to tilt her chin up so her eyes can meet mine. I could understand most people just by looking into their eyes. Most people don’t use the eyes to read what they are feeling and thinking, but I do. I have always had it; it has saved me many nights of pain and suffering. Sensing what the other person was thinking or feeling, I used this talent to help defuse a confrontation or easily flirt my way out of it. Yeah, it’s helped my ass out several times.
“Izzy, my mom stopped by and now she is yelling at my dad. She had gotten so mad at me before I went into the house. Dad doesn’t know the half of it.” She blew out a breath trying to hide the tears welling in her beautiful eyes.
I hated seeing this sweet girl so sad. It was like déjà vu, as if I was listening to myself not so long ago. I was as lost and hurt like she is now. It struck a chord in my heart and shattered it. Her eyes said it all.
I grabbed her and crushed her to my chest. I cradled her and took her into my house. We walked over to the couch and sat down. She started to cry instantly, again breaking my heart even more. I remember feeling like I had no one, I was left to face pain and despair all by myself; just like she’s feeling now. They say, it takes one to know one but dang, it hurts to see the pain in her eyes. The pain I endured and lived with scarred me; deeply. I refuse to let someone, I know, feel that kind of pain, to be bullied by the hands and words of another person has its own personal hell. I’ll be damned if I’m going to sit by and let Eve be hurt like this. Not with me around. She may have shit for a mother, but I am her friend.
“Honey, I am so sorry, did you tell your dad?” I say looking down at her as she lay against my chest. Kissing the top of her head, I rock her and just listen. She needed to talk to someone; I can imagine she can’t with her bitch of a mother and Braxton is too gruff most of the time. His only care is to protect Eve; he just was not always gentle about it.
“She yells at me, mostly over stupid stuff. I don’t think she likes me very much.” Her words trail off as she weeps into me. It guts me to see such a young girl who is like a flower ready to bloom only to be crushed by the one person who should love her like no other. I let her continue on with the story of a girl tormented by a mother who would rather not be held down by a child. Eve feels like she cramps her style, and the only reason, she has anything to do with her, is because she is hot after Braxton.
Sick really, it not only pisses me off; it makes me sick. Tiffany has this perfect gift in front of her who looks up to her with those puppy dog eyes. Eve only wants attention and the love of her mother. Only she is not going to get it, the only way she will get it is if Braxton stays with her. That thought only makes me want to throw-up in my mouth. I freeze when I hear my name mentioned.
She leans up and wipes her nose with the back of her hand looking up at me. I can tell right away she doesn't want to tell me, she’s all hushed as she lowers her head to speak.
“My momma hates you. She says you just want to tear my family apart. She told me you didn’t even like me, the only reason, you hang out with me, is to get closer to my dad.”
She stops speaking and I am trembling so much I try to hold my shit together. How can a woman tell a little girl any of this shit, to any child, let alone her daughter; lies, all lies? I am suddenly panicked.
Does Eve believe her, does this sweet child harbor bad feelings for me? If she did, would she be with me right now crying in my arms? I don’t think so, I believe she was lost and needed someone. She needed me. The thought breaks a
smile on my face. I smile softly as I grab her close and kiss her head.
“Baby girl, that is so not true do you understand that? None of what she said is true. I love hanging out with you; it has nothing to do with your dad. Eve, I’m not sure what to say here. I don’t have any kids, but I do know what it is like to be hurt by people you love. People who should always protect you and make you feel safe. I am not one of those people who want to hurt you, I do care for you and I would never hurt you. Ever.” Closing my eyes, the tears gently fall on my cheeks as I silently pray for this sweet, sweet girl.
With my eyes still closed, I jump when my front door swings open and in strides a very not happy looking Braxton. Still absolutely beautiful, his nose flares and he looks like he is going to tear someone’s head off. Tense, his muscles taut, he is on a mission. He notices me with his daughter sitting on the couch. Eve straddled in my lap, my arms cradling her. You could see the look of wonderment as Braxton wrinkles his forehead. The moment he realizes his little girl is sniffling and wiping her eyes, he softens. He groans and comes over and kneels down in front of us, his eyes never leaving Eve. He gently rubs his hands up and down her arms trying to comfort her.
“Hey, baby girl, what’s going on? You had me scared, not sure where you ran off to at first; then it hit me. You wanted to be with your best buddy Iz. Came running when I got done with your mother.” Acid laced in his words.
“Is, is, she gone?” The poor thing was shuddering in her crying state.
“Yeah honey, when she got done yelling and hollering, she took off. I told her I was done listening to it.” He finally lets his gaze go from Eve to me. I can tell he likes what he sees so far. He likes me holding his baby girl, and he likes that she has someone who treats her with care and love.
His expression changes when he can see the tears streaming down my face, not having much make-up on I know I can’t have mascara running down my cheeks, but, I bet I look dandy.
“What the hell…Izzy why are you and my daughter both crying?” He wasn’t mad, I could tell by the soulful look in those amazing trance setting eyes. He was concerned and trying not to get upset. You could tell Braxton did not do well with the crying ladies.
“Nothing that a good ole’ ass kicking wouldn’t fix. Sorry, Eve honey, I didn’t mean to say that out loud and in front of you.” I say shaking my head and wiping my eyes, I realized my mistake by once again not filtering my mouth, and just airing whatever comes to my mind.
His smile is as soft as his words. “Nothing worse than she has heard her whole life Iz, she doesn’t get sheltered too much as I am sure you know by now. Want to fill me in why you are both crying?”
“It’s momma; she hates me just as much as she hates Izzy, daddy. Why does momma hate me so much?” The honesty in this child is so pure and innocent it just takes my breath away; she was one hundred percent truthful with her dad, asking why her mother hates her. Seriously; this is so fucked.
“No baby, she doesn’t hate you. She just doesn’t know how to love you. It’s not in her to love a child, like she damn well should. As far as Izzy; she’s jealous. She sees how much you look up to her, and it drives your momma crazy. It’s not you honey.” Braxton has tears in his eyes now as he caresses her cheek; I think he finally realizes how hard this is on Eve.
“You mean this is all Izzy’s fault? She hates me because of Izzy?” Her voice raised an octave, and I can feel how tense her body is. She straightened up and looked at me with hurt and uncertainty.
The way Braxton’s body tensed up, I honestly wanted to crawl in a hole. When did this become all about me?
“Not at all, come on Eve, honestly do you believe that? Listen to me and listen to me real good. Your momma has always been flighty with you and you damn well know it. She is in this fit because I am spending time with Izzy. She hates it, and she can see you like her, so it makes her madder. Not Izzy’s fault, the only thing, Izzy has done, is like you a whole damn lot. The reason, she came to work for me, was because of you darlin’. It was so she could see you more; she took the job to be closer to you. Now tell me that is not a woman you should like and look up to? This woman is here on the couch listening to you and holding you. She is damn well crying with you as well. Tell me when that thing you call ‘mother’ ever did that with you?” Braxton was proving a point, but halfway through his sermon he was getting a tiny bit louder and terse.
He realized what he was saying was the truth, and it pissed him off. He was sticking up for me, and it did bring a smile to my face and warmed the hell out of my heart. Big damn teddy bear, I just wanted to haul off and hug the shit out of him and maybe kiss him some and then maybe stroke his chest with my fingertips. Then that would lead to heavy petting and some much-needed licking, Shit. Shit. Shit. I need to get my head back on straight; back to the moment at hand. I knew I needed to say something.
“Eve, I am so sorry if you think this is all because of me. I would never want you to hurt in any way, and if I am to blame for any part of it, I will take myself out of the equation, you hear me honey?” My eyes are pleading with hers; I want her to understand I would put her feelings above my own.
“Like HELL you are woman, you are one hundred percent not going anywhere. The only thing, you have done, is to treat my daughter like the mother she deserves. Hell, you two are like two best friends, and I’m the third wheel. I want to be in this equation, and I think you know that Izzy, don’t you?” His voice and matches his eyes so sweet and tender.
Closing my eyes momentarily, I whimper as his words mean so much to me. Sighing, I say, “Ah you are cute when you pout those lips of yours big guy.”
“Okay, but my momma is on the warpath Izzy. She told me to stop hanging around you and also said something about finding some dirt out on you. I’m… I’m scared. She was on the phone with some guy. Daddy, will momma hurt Izzy because I like her. Is this all my fault? Did I make this happen, daddy?” The rising panic in her visibly shaky little voice is so sad.
Crying again, she sank into her father’s big arms. He held her close and kept his eyes on mine. His eyes were telling me a story of hurt for his daughter and anger with the woman who helped him create this little girl. Confusion maybe, but I also saw a person who wanted to let me know he would protect me, his Izzy. Damn it, those eyes of his. They could tell a story all on their own.
Grabbing his phone, he asked Liam to come and get his niece so he could spend some time talking to me. He explained to his daughter none of this is her fault, and he would protect both of his girls; Eve and me. There he goes again, his two girls. It never gets old to hear; makes me warm and tingly inside.
Moments later Liam strolls through my front door, smiling from ear to ear.
“Hey, there Izzy. Eve sweetheart, why don’t you come with your Uncle Liam and let's go get some ice cream? I need my girl so we can pick up the chick at the ice cream parlor.” He snickers and laughs when Eve runs to him to give him a big hug.
Braxton makes such a noise we all look his way. “Easy man, my girl is not some pawn to use for your personal pleasure. No picking up chick’s with my girl.”
“Hey, just giving everyone a laugh here, it’s way too damn serious in this room.” Walking into the living room, Liam looks over at me.
“Izzy honey, stay strong. We got your back girl, don’t worry.” Liam winks with a panty melting smile as well.
Oh my. “Ummm… Liam, my back thanks you for watching it.”
This has him laughing about how ‘he loves my sense of humor’.
Before walking out the door with Eve, he glances back one more time smirking.
“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do now you two.” Seriously, I just stare at him. Not only good looking his sense of humor is funny as hell. I really like him.
Clearing his throat, Braxton must have seen my eyes linger on Liam longer than necessary. My cheeks instantly feel like they are on fire.
“What?” Baffled and trying to ease his consciousness. “Hey, I
was just thinking my friend Kara would be all over Liam in a heartbeat.”
“Sure you were, now I had something I wanted to talk to you about, but right now I need to make a point and stake my claim.” He says while his eyes scan my body. Following the path his eyes take my body starts to come to life.
Breathlessly, I ask, “What point do you need to make and how do you plan to claim me?” I try to act innocent, I know what he meant and why as well. I put my hand on my hip and give him a glance like I was waiting for his response.
Closing the distance, I am hauled into his arms and laid down on the couch. Nose to nose, lips to lips. Our breathing becomes labored, hearts pounding out of our chests and my goodness the temperature is rising. The humor of this all has left the room as lust and want replace it.
“Talk later honey. I need to remind you who your eyes should be looking at. Don’t like you looking at Liam like that babe. Seriously I hated it. Those sweet big brown eyes need to be undressing me, not Liam.”
“I was not undressing him,” I argued but was failing.
“Was so. Liar.” His sexy as sin smile leaves me damn near speechless.
Biting my lip, I whisper saying, “Not.”
“You are a shit liar and for that little stunt, you need to be reminded who’s fucking body makes you scream in pleasure. It’s my hands you were coming on so hard in your bed honey, not Liam’s. Never will it be anyone other than me.” His whisper touches my lips gingerly. His tongue wets my bottom lip as I whimper out with a moan arching my body into his.
I come clean. “Okay, I was checking him out; I think you need to remind me again and again about how my eyes are only for you. Make me remember how I came so fucking hard with your hand rubbing me senseless, only this time, I want you naked.” My forward words seem to have caused Braxton to stop breathing; he has a look of dumbstruck followed by an evil grin.
