by Sarah Peis
Well, almost.
So far there was no sign of Jim or my stalker, but it was still early in the morning. Who knew what the day would bring?
Malena raised a brow at me, linking her fingers on top of the table. “Start talking. I only have twenty minutes before I have to go back to the office.”
I sighed but had already decided to tell her everything. “Jim screwed up and pissed off the wrong people. They want the money he owes them and think I’m the way to get it. Sebastian is part of the people he screwed over, and he’s responsible for watching me.”
I stopped, gauging her reaction so far. She was staring at me slack-jawed, unblinking.
I forged on, the dam now open and the words flowing. “We hooked up. For him it was just a way to get off, but for me it was so much more. He made me feel special, like I was important to him. It was stupid, and I should have known it would never lead to anything. But I did it anyway because no matter what, I couldn’t shake the attraction I felt for him. I’ve never felt this way for anyone. Not even Jim.”
“Oh, chiquita,” Malena said, getting up.
I met her halfway and fell into her arms, giving a choked laugh. “I’m so stupid.”
“You’re naïve, not stupid. And it’s nothing to be ashamed of. It’s what makes you so special. Despite all the shit life has piled on you, you’re still optimistic and—most of all—happy.”
My heart ached with sorrow, and I closed my eyes in an attempt to ward off the misery that was building inside. I wasn’t feeling very happy in that moment.
“What do I do now?” I asked, holding her tight.
“You dust yourself off and move the fuck on. Nobody who treats you like that is worth your pain.”
I shook my head, not moving out of the safety of her embrace. Closing my eyes seemed like a solid strategy to cope with life.
Malena had other ideas, taking my arms and moving me a step back. “Querida, you’re stronger than this.”
“But I’m not.”
She leaned closer, making sure I was paying attention. “Yes you are.”
We stayed like that, eyes locked, both waiting for the other one to say something.
“Mom,” Lena’s sleepy voice interrupted us.
She was walking into the kitchen, her feet shuffling along the floor.
“Hey, baby girl,” I said, picking her up and cuddling her close. She snuggled into my arms, making me forget some of my heartache.
“Cute outfit. Did you dress yourself today, guapa?” Malena asked, eyeing Lena’s pink and white striped dress and red and orange polka-dot tights.
“No, I did,” I said, sticking my tongue out at Malena.
“At least you’ll always be able to see her, even in the dark,” Malena said and picked up her bag, winking at me. “Call me tonight?”
“I will. Thanks for coming over.”
She hugged us and kissed Lena’s head. “Anytime.”
I worked the rest of the day, watching the clock, every passing minute bringing me closer to seeing Sebastian again. No matter how much he hurt me, the invisible connection pulling me to him was still there.
I picked Luca up with Gears trailing us. After asking where Sebastian was when he didn’t come along to pick him up, Luca chattered the whole way back.
“Why do you have to works tonight?” Luca asked later that night when he was getting ready for bed. I was once again running late, but apparently so was Sebastian.
“Because I need to earn money,” I said. He was a bit young to understand why people had to work, but I tried my best to explain it to him.
“Buts we got money,” he said, stepping into his pajama pants.
“We do because I have a job. If I didn’t go anymore, then we wouldn’t have any money and would have to sleep in a tent.”
I hadn’t thought that through properly, because sleeping in a tent was an exciting prospect for my kids.
“I wants to sleep in a tent,” Luca cried.
Lena joined him. “Me too.”
“Who’s going to sleep in a tent?” Stella asked, appearing in the door.
“Me, because Mom is staying home,” Luca said with a big smile.
Stella looked at me with a smirk on her face. “Is that right?”
I caught Luca and lifted him, making sure I had his attention. “Sleeping in a tent isn’t really a good idea. Especially not when it’s cold. I’ll still have to go to work.”
He slumped in my arms, and his bottom lip quivered. “But I love tents.”
“How about we put one up in the living room?” Stella suggested.
“Small problem,” I said, putting Luca back on his feet. “I don’t have one.”
Her excitement didn’t falter. “I’ll message Mason to drop one off. He’s got about ten.”
She pulled her phone out and started typing, Luca and Lena dancing around her.
I left them to it and searched for my shoes and bag. Every day I promised myself I’d put them down near the front door so I would find them again. And every day I dropped them somewhere in the house and forgot where.
My shoes were under the couch, and my bag was in the bathroom.
I opened the front door, calling across the street to Gears. “Do you know where Sebastian is? I have to go to work.”
He jogged over, coming to stand in front of me. “He’s on his way.”
“Okay, thanks,” I said, and he went back to his post across the street. They couldn’t be more obvious if they tried. No way would Jim come back with a big bike and bigger dude sitting in front of my house.
When a knock sounded a few minutes later, I kissed the kids goodbye and waved to Stella. “Have fun.”
I opened the door, but instead of Sebastian, it was Mason standing in front of me. “Hey, Mason. You here to drop off the tent?”
He nodded and leaned in, kissing me on the cheek.
“I was summoned,” he said, holding up two bags. “I had two small tents lying around, collecting dust. The kids can have them.”
“They’ll love that. Just go inside. They’re in the living room,” I said, smiling at him.
Mason and Stella had been the most supportive friends I could have ever wished for. I shouldn’t have been surprised that he not only brought two tents but ones the kids could keep.
The load roar of a motorcycle sounded, and we watched Sebastian pull into my driveway.
“That your new roommate?” Mason asked, his tone amused.
“Yup. He’s also my lift to work, so I should go.”
He nodded at me and looked back at Sebastian, who was stalking up my walkway. “He looks angry.”
I shrugged. What’s new?
“What’s going on?” Sebastian growled when he was only a few steps away.
I frowned at his obvious dislike of Mason, who he’d never met before. “Sebastian, this is Stella’s boyfriend and my landlord, Mason.”
As soon as the word boyfriend left my lips, Sebastian’s entire demeanor changed. His posture relaxed, his fists unclenched, and he even held out his hand to Mason. “Heard a lot about you. Good to meet you.”
“You too,” Mason said, accepting the peace offering. After a brief handshake and a wink in my direction, he went inside.
With the latest crisis averted, I turned, ready to be on my way to work.
“Sorry I’m late,” Sebastian said, following me to his bike.
I wanted to know where he’d been but didn’t ask. He didn’t owe me anything, after all.
I put on my purple helmet, standing far enough away that he couldn’t reach out to do it for me. Sebastian got on the bike first and then held out his hand to help me up.
As soon as our palms connected, I froze, the instant tingle shooting through my body making me squirm.
He didn’t release my hand once I was sitting behind him; instead, he pulled it around to his front, causing me to slide forward and into his body.
Since I would never protest about sitting this close to him,
my other arm joined the one he was still holding. No matter how mad I was at him, I still craved him, and the need to touch him was ever present.
Once he was satisfied that I wasn’t going to move back, he put his hands on the handlebars and started the bike.
I sat stiffly behind him, not enjoying the ride as usual. I was desperate to touch him but still too mad to let myself enjoy being this close to him.
He stayed with me while I did my thing outside Pepper’s, his attention on me the whole time.
“Okay, I’m ready,” I said once my racing heart settled down and I felt like I wasn’t going to pass out if I walked inside.
He led me to the dressing room door, trailing his hand down my arm before leaving.
I watched him walk away, my heart wheezing out a few pathetic breaths. When I came back out and started working, I spotted him standing in his usual spot near the stage, arms crossed in front of his chest, his muscles bulging, watching me.
I messed up a few orders because all I could think about was the way he took care of me. How he’d made me feel special. The way he was with my kids. And all of it I liked. Craved more of.
But at the same time, I didn’t want to lose what little dignity I had left. Been there, done that. My thoughts were all over the place, veering from planning a way to get him alone to a way to hurt him as much as he’d hurt me.
Since revenge wasn’t in my repertoire, the thought fizzled out as soon as it ignited. I usually just moved on when someone had done me wrong. Guess that didn’t work out so well with Jim. He deserved for me to go all The Godfather on him. But since I was more Forrest Gump, I’d never get anywhere close to making him pay.
And that was okay. I just wished he’d keep his problems away from me and the kids. If I was honest, Sebastian’s betrayal hurt much more than Jim’s ever had. I’d moved on after Jim, thinking I’d dodged a bullet finding out when I did instead of letting him drag me down with him.
Sebastian, on the other hand, managed to twist my stomach into knots, and the thought of never kissing him again made my body ache. He’d buried himself so deep into my heart, I didn’t know how to ever get him out.
As desperate as I was not to repeat past mistakes, all I wanted was to forgive him.
“Bitch, are you deaf?” someone yelled at me, causing me to snap out of watching Sebastian.
I pasted on a weak smile and turned to the entitled cheesedick demanding my attention. I’d never understand how some people thought it was okay to treat waitresses like second-class citizens. Especially when they worked in a strip club.
“How can I help you, sir?” I asked, holding my tablet at the ready.
“We want another round,” he barked at me. Their table wasn’t in my section, so I didn’t know what they’d all had. But it would be easy to find out, so I nodded and turned to do his bidding.
A slap to my ass made me stumble forward. My cheek stung from the harsh treatment, and tears shot to my eyes. I really needed to grow a thicker skin. I refused to look back at what I was sure would be a smirk on the guy’s face, daring me to tell him off. That was how it usually worked, and I was over it.
There was a loud crash, and I turned after all. Sebastian was dragging the guy off his chair and to the exit. He threw him outside like he wasn’t a middle-aged, overweight guy but a sack of potatoes.
The whole room watched in awe, and I knew it would take about three seconds for Smitty to show up. There were cameras all around the main area, and he always knew what was going on.
“You are a death sentence to my business,” Smitty cried right on cue, stalking up to Sebastian.
I shuffled closer like everyone else, not wanting to miss a word.
“You mean the club’s business,” Sebastian corrected him, looking like he was dealing with an annoying bug he wanted to brush off his sleeve.
“Stop throwing customers out the door. You could handle this shit more discreetly.”
Sebastian raised a brow, looking down at Smitty, who was at least two heads shorter than him. “I want them to know they aren’t allowed to touch the girls.”
Smitty threw his hands up. “You mean they’re not allowed to touch one particular girl. Never seen you handle someone like that when it was one of the other girls.”
He stalked off with as much drama as he’d arrived. Sebastian glanced in my direction and only turned away when I gave him a tentative smile.
Everyone behaved for the rest of the night and Sebastian met me at the back door when it was time to go home. He opened the door for me to walk through, but I stopped in front of him and tilted my head back. “Thank you.”
“You don’t ever have to thank me for putting those assholes in their place. He had no right to touch you.”
I put my hands on his chest and stepped closer. He was still holding the door with one hand, his other fisted at his side. “You always seem to come to my rescue.”
“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but you’re important to me,” he said, his voice raspy.
I took another step forward, putting us closer together so we were almost touching. “You’re important to me too.”
His eyes flicked over my face, and I tipped my head back, leaning in. He didn’t miss the invitation and lowered his lips to mine, the contact whisper soft but no less impactful.
I sighed into his mouth, and he deepened the kiss.
“Sorry to interrupt, but you chose the worst spot to do this,” Elle said, and I jerked back. She was standing behind us with a smirk on her face. “I let you go for as long as I could take it, but that kiss nearly took my pants off.”
I flushed in embarrassment, and Sebastian shook his head at her, amusement dancing in his eyes. “Sorry, Elle. Come on through.”
She walked past him, giving him a wink, then turning to me, waggling her eyebrows.
Sebastian put his arm around my shoulders and walked us to his bike. He waited until Elle was in her car and pulling out of the parking lot before starting the engine.
I leaned my head against his back and enjoyed the ride, feeling lighter than I had in a while.
When we pulled back up to the house, I was reluctant to get off the bike. It was the one place we could just be. No misunderstandings, no hurt feelings. Just us.
Instead of walking up to the front door, Sebastian pulled me around the side. I followed, curious what he was up to.
We stopped at the foot of the playhouse, ushering me inside.
“Are we having a tea party?” I asked, crawling inside. I still hadn’t found out who put it there but had my suspicions it had something to do with my roommate.
He followed me, shrinking the space to about a quarter of its size.
“The last thing I have on my mind when I’m with you is a tea party,” he said and leaned his back against one of the walls, pulling me into his side. I relaxed into him, my arm snaking under his shirt, caressing the soft skin of his abs.
“I want to talk to you without distractions,” he said, placing a kiss on my hair. “That’s why we’re hiding out here.”
I chuckled, my body vibrating with mirth. “You know Stella is going to show up out here in a few minutes. She’d have undoubtedly heard the bike pull up and seen us walk around to the backyard.”
“I know. But I didn’t want to wait a second longer to make this right. I want you—no, I need you to hear me out. If you still don’t want to give me another chance, then I understand.”
I sighed, the seriousness of his words sinking like a warm blanket around me. He took my silence as assent to continue.
“The initial plan was if Jim thought you’d shacked up with one of us, he’d do something stupid in response and come out of hiding. But only because that happened to be part of the plan doesn’t mean my feelings for you are any less real.”
I buried my head in his chest, breathing him in, reminding myself that he wasn’t pursuing any agenda right now. He didn’t have to say those things to continue staying with me. It slowly sank
in that maybe—just maybe—his feelings for me matched my own.
“I volunteered for this job. Blade wanted to send someone else. Said he needed someone with a clear head who wasn’t obsessed with you. In a healthy way, of course.”
All my movements froze, my breath stalling.
Did he just say what I think I heard? Or have I fallen asleep and this is a dream?
“But we’d never spoken a word to one another before the first time I came to the clubhouse,” I said, lifting my head off his chest.
“Doesn’t matter. Not to me.”
“Sebastian—” I said, but he stopped me.
“My parents have loved each other their whole lives. In fact, they still love each other like they did when they first met,” he said. I shuffled closer, putting my hand on his cheek, and he turned into the gentle caress. “I always wanted what they have. My dad told me it was love at first sight for him and Mom. That when I saw the one who was meant for me, I’d know. And I always laughed at him. Told him he was crazy.”
His eyes held mine, showing me how much he meant every word he said. “And then I met you, and I finally understood what he was talking about.”
I crushed my lips against his, clawing my way closer, the need to feel him overwhelming. He met my tongue stroke for stroke, and soon we were panting, our hands gliding over every inch of each other’s body.
“If you’re trying to hide from me, you’re doing a terrible job because I can see your legs. And they’re way too close to each other,” Stella interrupted us. “No sexy times in the playhouse. That’s just wrong.”
I untangled myself from Sebastian, closing my eyes. His hand whispered across my cheek, and then he shuffled out before helping me.
Stella was waiting for us, barely holding it together, vibrating with the effort it took to stop the laughter that I could see was bubbling to the surface. She lost the battle and guffawed so loud, I was worried she’d wake the kids.
“I knew you had it in you,” she wheezed out once she’d calmed down.
“Shut up,” I said and rolled my eyes at her.
We walked back inside, the look on Stella’s face telling me I’d have to give her a word-for-word replay of tonight.
