“My what?”
“Respect for her. Because all I’m hearing is disrespect. And I’d got to tell you, she’s worth more respect than anyone I’ve ever known.”
Emily starts weeping, and I pull her into my arms. I don’t give a fucking damn about her parents. I don’t think I’ll ever give a damn about them. They don’t even want to have a polite conversation with me? Fuck them.
All that matters now is her. This is crushing her, I can tell. It’s everything she’s been stressing about come true.
“Are you okay, Goldie?” I say into her ear, my voice low.
She sobs harder against my chest. I blot out everything else, her parents, the food court, the mall, everything except her.
“Do you want to stay, or do you want me to get you out of here? It’s up to you.”
Emily’s mother starts to speak without even attempting to lower her voice, “Oh, dear God, she said she was going to stay at Courtney’s tonight, Greg.”
A shudder runs through Emily's body. She’s obviously heard what her mother said. Fire courses through my veins. How dare they do this to her.
“Come on, we’re leaving,” I say, standing and pulling Emily up with me. I glare at her parents and say, “She’ll speak to you when you can be civil. You should be ashamed of yourselves, treating your daughter this way.”
Her dad starts to say something, but I don’t hear it. I need to get her out of here.
I have no idea if they’ll follow us to hassle her some more, or if her dad will try to stop us from going, so I hustle my ass, half carrying Emily, all the way to her car.
“I’ll drive,” I say, grabbing her purse and fishing through it for her key.
Once the car is unlocked, I open the passenger door and bustle her into the car, all while watching behind me for signs of her father. I hop into the driver's seat, slide it back to make room for my legs, and pull away. Her phone beeps, probably a text message.
After a mile or so, I ask, “How are you doing?”
A massive sob shudders out of her chest. I reach over and rest my hand on her thigh, wondering how fast I can drive to get back to the motel. Ten over, twenty? I don’t want those two following us or finding out where we’re staying.
Emily’s sobbing lessens after a few more miles. I don’t think there’s any point in talking until I can do it with her in my arms. She needs the time to digest what just happened. I’ve got to calm myself down anyway. Her phone rings, and she pulls it out of her purse and turns it off.
The last thing I need to do is saying something about her parents that pushes her back to them. Even though I’d like to bust her dad’s nose open right about now.
We pull into the Motel 6 parking lot and I park near my door. I help Emily out of the car, and grip her hand while I unlock the door to the room.
The second we’re in the room and the door is shut behind us, I pull her against me and hold her tight.
“I need some water,” she says, looking up at me.
“Sit down, I’ll get you some.”
I guide her to the side of the bed and she sits. There’s a wrapped glass on a shelf, and I unwrap it and fill it with water from the bathroom tap. Turning to leave the bathroom, I come face to face with Emily. Her eyes are puffy and rimmed in red.
“How could they treat you like that? They didn’t even give you a chance. No hi, how are you, nice to meet you. Nothing. They just sat there and insulted you.”
“Welcome to my world,” I say, passing her the glass.
“But why didn’t they listen to me at all? I told them what a great guy you are, and they didn’t give you a chance.”
“Honestly? I can’t say I’m too surprised. I told you, no one approves of their daughter hooking up with a carnie, especially not some rich guy like your father.”
“I don’t care, they were just plan rude, like you said. I can’t believe the way they treated you, or me,” she says.
“Hopefully it was just the shock of them finding out, and they’ll think about things tonight and be rational in the morning.”
Emily put the glass to her lips but doesn't open her mouth. Instead, she lets the water wash against her lips, her eyes narrowed. The longer she stands there, the more her eyes narrow.
She opens her lips and takes several gulps of water. I take the glass out of her hand and set it back on the shelf, before pulling her back into my arms.
“It pisses me off so much, it makes me want to run away and join the carnival,” she says, her voice steady and strong.
It’s a bad idea, she’s not cut out for the carnival. But I can’t deny her words make my heart leap a little.
24
Running with the Devil (Emily)
“You’ll figure things out with them,” Steel says.
“You’ve been right all along.”
“About?”
“I need to be my own woman and live my own life. Instead of doing what they want and expect me to do.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“My entire life is laid out in front of me, it's so boring. I'm twenty and drive a mom car. I want to do something fun for once.”
“So you’re serious?”
“Yes, I’m serious. Let’s go work at the carnival all summer. It’d be so much fun.” I need to get away from my shitty little small town and figure out my life. It’s difficult to think of a funner way to do that than by running away with Steel.
“It’s not all fun and games, you’d be working your ass off.”
“I don’t mind getting my hands dirty.”
“You sure about that? Those nails look pretty polished to me.”
Taking a step back from him, I say, “I didn’t just think of this today. I’ve been wondering about it for ages. Before you ever showed up in town again, actually.”
“I don’t buy it.”
“It’s true. When I was trying to find you, I wondered about taking off and joining different carnivals until I found you.”
Steel rolls his eyes and my heart sinks. I take the glass of water from the shelf and walk back to the bed. Why isn’t he excited by this? I thought he’d be all over it.
Plunking myself on the edge of the bed, I set the water on the bedside table and grab my purse. Unable to resist the urge any longer, I pull out my phone and turn it on.
It vibrates non-stop, and the room fills with the chimes of new texts messages and voicemails. From my mother, my father, my brothers and Courtney.
The texts are more of their shit. My mother begging me to be safe, my father accusing me of only doing this to hurt his precious reputation, and the others asking me what the hell is going on. I can’t be bothered to listen to the voicemails, I have a pretty damn good idea what they say.
I send a response to Courtney.
I’ve been dating Steel and my parents found out and flipped.
A phone call from my mother comes while the phone is in my hand. I hit ignore and set the phone on the table.
Steel pulls up the desk chair and places it in front of me. He sits and leans forwards, taking my hands in his.
“Remember the way your parents talked about me? That’s how people would talk about you.”
“People can say whatever they want about me, it’s not like it’d be any worse than the way my parents talk about me.”
“I ain’t kidding. You won’t believe the shit the public will try on you. They’ll look at you different than they do now. You’ll be a carny, and they think that means they can treat you anyway they feel, because you’re scum and don’t deserve any respect. In their minds, you’ve had your trial, and you’re guilty.”
I’m quiet and stare at my hands in his while I contemplate Steel’s words. How bad is it? Is he exaggerating because he doesn’t want me to join?
“What about the other carnies? How would they treat me?”
“Other carnies won’t do nothing to you, they’d all know you was my woman and it’d be hands off. They’re good people, they’d
make sure no townie did something to you.”
“What do you mean, physically?”
“A pretty girl like you? Trust me, some of those townie folk think they have to the right to get handsy with you.”
“I somehow don’t think you’d let anything happen to me.”
“Fucking right I wouldn’t, that’s why I’m telling you this.”
My phone rings again. My father this time. I pick up the phone and hit call reject. A half dozen more texts have come in while we’ve been talking, including one from Courtney.
-That’s insane. What on earth are you thinking? Why didn’t you tell me?
Gee, I wonder, Courtney.
I didn’t tell you because you’d get all judgmental, like you are now.
Another text comes, this one from Barbara at the coffee shop. How the hell does she even know my number?
-Emily, I just wanted to let you know that some friends and I are having a prayer meeting for your family, Barbara
How is this happening? It’s not even been an hour, and the entire town of Colmar is talking about it already. The gossips are out in full force tonight.
“You know what? Right now I want out of this life and this town so badly that I’ll put up with any bullshit the carnival goers want to throw at me.”
“You sure you want that?”
“I told you before that I’m being serious. This isn’t a spur of the minute thing that I just came up with. I need to find myself as an adult, to get away from all the crap with my family and learn to be the person I want to be.”
“It’s a good life. We can go all over the country. See the Everglades, the Mississippi. And the best thing is, we’d be together all the time. But…”
“But what?”
“But you don’t have to decide tonight. This is a big decision to up and leave your family, and you don’t want to have any regrets.”
“You up and left yours.”
“That was my foster family, not my real one.”
I look up at his eyes, wondering if he’s finally going to reveal more about himself.
“And your real ones?” I ask softly, unsure if he’ll answer.
Steel stands and walks towards the tv, a silence hanging in the air.
“I never knew my father,” he says with his back to me.
My heart wrenches in my chest. He opened up. Do I dare push for more? I want to know everything about this damn man, but he never talks about his past.
Do I go up behind him and hug him? Or is it better to stay here, sitting on the bed. My phone beeps again, but I ignore it. I open my mouth to speak, but Steel interrupts me.
“You’d better check that.”
Sighing, I look at my phone. It’s a text from Courtney
I’m not getting judgmental, but the guy has a neck tattoo. Don’t you see warning signs?
While the phone’s in my hand, I flick through some of the ones from my mother. She’s having a conniption fit about my safety.
I only manage to look at the top one from my father.
The whole town is talking about my daughter whoring herself to a scumbag
It fills me with rage, and I slam the phone onto the pillow.
I don’t care about answering any of them. I only want what’s in this room.
Steel’s still standing with his back to me. I wish I knew what he was thinking. Hopping up from the bed, I move to him and put my arms around him, pressing my face into his back.
“No regrets?” I say.
“Not a single fucking one.”
“Me neither.”
He spins in my arms to face me. Our eyes lock and I’m flooded with the warmth he always brings me. Always. That’s all that matters. Not that anyone else cares, but if I’m learning anything, it’s that what anyone else thinks doesn’t matter.
“If you’re serious, I’ll phone Papa Smurf and find out where he’s at. I’ve worked with him so long, there’s no doubt he’d want me back. But I have to find out if he’d take you,” he says, cupping my cheek.
On the one hand I’m buzzing with excitement. On the other, I hadn’t considered the idea that I wouldn’t be hired. I feel foolish assuming I could just expect them to hire me.
My phone starts ringing and beeping like crazy, all the vibrations move it to the edge of the pillow and onto the bed. The calls and texts keep coming.
Trying not to panic, I move back to the bed and grab it. Courtney is phoning. Do I answer it?
In the end I ignore it, and look through the most recent texts. My mother’s hysteria has reached new heights.
I won’t let that man take my baby’s innocence
I snort with laughter. Too late for that, Mom.
“What’s so funny?”
“My mother doesn’t want you to steal my innocence.”
Steel chuckles, “Too fucking late for that.”
“Should I tell her?” I say, laughing, ready to type.
The phone rings again, it’s Courtney. I let it ring until it goes to voicemail. Courtney instantly rings again. Have they put her up to something?
“Hey, what is it?” I say into the phone.
“Emily, I don’t know what’s going on with you and that guy, but you need to know your father rounded up a bunch of his friends to go out hunting for your car.”
Courtney’s words punch me in the chest and knock the wind out of me.
25
Hell Bent for Leather (Steel)
I don’t know what the fuck the person on the phone just said to her, but Emily’s face is paler than a kid who’s just gone through the Haunted House.
“Thanks a bunch, Courtney. I’ll call you later,” Emily says and turns off her phone. She looks at me and says, “We need to get out of here, now.”
“Huh?”
“My dad and his buddies are out looking for us.”
“For real?”
“My parents have gone insane. Why don’t they think I can make my own decisions? Good decisions. Ones that make me happy.”
“I don’t get it,” I say, shaking my head.
“We have to go to the carnival now,” she says, her voice forceful.
“I don’t even know where they’re at.”
“Can’t you phone from the car? My parents are freaking, I’m not having them hold me prisoner again. They’ll know we’re not in Colmar, and Woburn is the first place they’ll start looking.”
Maybe she’s right, the carnival is the perfect place for her to grow up and get away from their hold on her life.
I grab her chin and force her eyes into mine. As much as I want to go back to being what I am, I’m not taking her to that life unless she’s certain it’s what she wants.
“Are you sure the carnival’s the place you want to go?” I ask, my voice gruff.
“Yes.”
“Really sure?”
“Yes.”
“That doesn’t sound like a carny talking to me.”
Emily giggles and says, “Fuck, yeah I’m sure.”
“We’re in for some fun,” I say and kiss her cheek.
Going around the room, I start gathering my stuff and cram it in my backpack.
“What about all your stuff?” I ask.
“It’s gone.”
“Huh?”
“There’s no way I’m going home to get a damn thing. I’ll buy whatever I need.” Her words are strong, but her voice trembles. I drop the backpack and hold her tight against me.
“Don’t be scared, Goldie, I’ll take good care of you.”
“I know,” she says, sinking her body into mine.
I kiss the top of her head and stroke her back. We stay still for a minute, while she controls her nerves.
“We should go,” I say, my voice soothing, “before they find us. A cheap motel is the first place they’ll look. It’s only eight. We can drive for an hour and find another place to stay.”
Emily nods her head, and I release her from my arms. We move around the room, gathering the rest
of my stuff and cramming it in my backpack. I bought some more clothes while I was here, and it’s a struggle to fit them all in.
“I’ll check out, you wait in the car.”
I lock up the room and go to the office to check out. When I leave the office again, the Corolla is smack in front of the office door. Emily’s sitting in the driver’s seat, her fingers gripping the wheel so tight, her knuckles are white.
Opening the driver door, I say, “Why don’t you let me drive?”
“You don’t know where we’re going,” she says, looking up at me, her jaw tight.
“Neither do you.”
I take her hand and lead her out of the car and around to the passenger side. She opens the door and gets in, and I close it again.
In the driver’s seat, I pull out of the motel parking lot and turn right.
“If you go straight, you’ll eventually get to the freeway,” she says.
That was luck. We keep hitting reds, and I put my foot down each time the light goes green to get us out of here as fast as possible. Emily keeps looking all around, as if she’s being hunted. I put my hand on her thigh, trying to relax her.
Once we’ve reached the freeway, we drive for an hour towards Raleigh. There’s a sign for a gas station, so I pull into it and put the car in park.
“I’m going to phone Papa Smurf,” I say taking out my phone.
“Okay,” Emily says, and turns to stare out the back window.
“Papa,” I say when he answers the phone.
“Steel. You had enough of chasing that tail and coming back?”
“Oh, I’m coming back all right, but I’m bringing my woman with me.”
“Fuck, man, for real? You always had the magic.”
“As real as day. You going to put her to work?”
“For you, anything.”
“Thanks, Papa. Now, where you at?”
“Near Gulfport.”
“Where the fuck’s that?”
“Mississippi, right on the Gulf.”
“Okay, what’s that? A day’s drive. I’ll be there tomorrow or the day after.” Depending on if I want to stop and show Emily something along the way.
Carny: A Bad Boy Small Town Romance Page 10
