“I-I… of course I want you to be happy.”
“Then why are you trying to force me into a relationship with a man I have no interest in?”
“I’m not forcing anything. You’re going to the ball as Nathan Roberts’ date. Reese isn’t even going to be there.” She sounded like she was choking back a sob.
“Mom, you know what I mean. You keep forcing the topic. You won’t let me drive to the dance with my date, but you would if I was going with Reese.”
She glanced around, took a deep breath, and stepped closer to Madisyn. “Your father is putting a lot of pressure on me, Mads. A lot. He really wants our family and the Rutherfords—”
“I know how Dad feels, but can I at least get a little support from you?”
Mom stepped so close they were nearly touching and lowered her voice. “He’s been yelling a lot lately. More than usual. I’m surprised he’s kept his cool around you this long, but I told him I would try to convince you. I’m trying to protect you, Mads.”
Madisyn’s hands turned cold. She shook as anger engulfed her. “Is he threatening you? Be honest.”
“No.” Mom put her hand on Madisyn’s arm. “Just know I want you happy above all else. No amount of money is worth a miserable marriage.” Tears shone in her eyes. “Don’t make the same mistakes I did. Go for love—it’s the most wonderful treasure. You don’t want a lifetime of regret, wondering what could be.”
Madisyn tilted her head. “Did you love someone else?”
Mom wiped the corner of her eye and nodded. “I won’t say who, but I will say that not a week goes by when I don’t wonder how much better off I would have been if I’d chosen love. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t regret you girls in the slightest. You two are my heart—callous as it has grown. But I watch him with his wife. I’ve never seen a man treat a woman better, and I can’t help but think that could’ve been me.”
“I never knew.” Madisyn’s heart broke for her mom. “I—”
“What are you two doing?” Dad barged into the room, his brows furrowed and his face red. “It’s past time to leave!” He glared at his wife. “I thought you said this gala was so important to the charity. If you don’t care about it, maybe I shouldn’t let you stay on the board! Then, since you’d have so much free time, we could fire Sally and you could clean the house and cook. How would you like that? Let’s go.” He stormed out of the room.
Madisyn took her mom’s hand and squeezed. “I’m so sorry.”
She squeezed back and whispered, “Don’t pity me, sweetie. I’ve been blessed in so many other ways despite my poor decision. That’s what I need to focus on—and one of the best blessings is standing right in front of me. Make me proud by following love. Do you love him? Nate?”
Madisyn paused and her pulse raced. “It’s definitely headed in that direction. The more we talk, the more I fall for him.”
“And he’s good to you?”
“Couldn’t be better.”
“Follow happiness, Mads. I love you. Truly, I want you to live the life you deserve.”
“I love you too, Mom.”
They embraced and quickly headed for the car. Madisyn’s mind swirled with everything her mom had just admitted. It had been a long time since she’d opened up to Madisyn, and definitely the first time she’d shared anything so personal. Madisyn was more determined than ever to avoid Reese now that she had her mom’s silent support.
The half-hour car ride was tense as Dad spouted off about how much he hated being late for anything and how he doubted Mom’s dedication to the charity. As Mom sat quietly, it was the first time Madisyn didn’t think of her as weak. It probably took every ounce of her mom’s self-control not to tell him what a jerk he was being. It certainly took all of Madisyn’s.
As soon as they parked, Madisyn flung open her door and hurried to the building.
“Madisyn!” her dad called.
She glanced back. He glared at her, waving her back. Mom smiled and opened her palm, giving Madisyn her blessing to go on. And that’s what she did. She rushed toward the entrance as fast as her narrow heels would allow.
Nate stood by the door, wearing a black suit with a dark blue tie—it matched her dress perfectly—and he held flowers in one hand. Though she definitely missed the ponytail, he certainly managed to take her breath away. He grinned, his entire face lighting up, when their gazes met and he walked down the steps, meeting her halfway.
“You look beautiful.” He took her hand and slid the wrist corsage over it. It also matched her dress.
Her voice caught in her throat. It took a moment to find it. “You look amazing yourself. How did you manage to match your tie and the flowers with my dress? It can’t be a coincidence.”
“A little bird told me.” He kissed the back of her hand. “Should we go inside? I hear it looks like an underwater wonderland.”
“Yeah, but who told you? My mom?”
He gave a little nod. “Let’s head in. Your dad doesn’t look all that happy to see me.”
Fourteen
Nate threaded his fingers through Madisyn’s and they headed up the steps. He could feel the stare of the man who’d fired his dad boring into his back.
Once inside, a blonde about his mom’s age pulled them aside. “Time for pictures.” She ushered them to a wall with a shimmery blue backdrop and a bubble machine blowing actual bubbles in front of it. “You two couldn’t be cuter. This is going to be the best picture of the night! I can’t believe how perfectly your dress and tie match the decor.”
Clearly, the woman didn’t know Madisyn’s mother was the driving force behind the dance.
“Stand closer.” She nudged Nate, pressing him against Madisyn. “Now step your right foot out just a couple inches.”
Nate followed the directions, his heart racing at being so close to Madisyn again.
“Perfect!” The blonde moved out of the way. “Now smile!”
She didn’t have to tell him twice. Nate grinned wider than he had in a long time. How could he not? He was at a dance with the most beautiful woman he’d ever met—both inside and out. The bright flash nearly blinded him, not once but three times.
The woman ushered them away, gushing about how much they were going to love the photos. She turned away from them and helped to pose Madisyn’s parents. Clyde glared at Nate with an icy stare.
Nate shuddered. If looks could kill…
Madisyn tugged on him, and he followed her to the dance floor. He’d had plenty of dance lessons growing up, so he figured he’d be okay no matter what music played. At the moment, it was an upbeat song and couples were just having fun.
Nate took Madisyn’s other hand and spun her around. She laughed and he pulled her close as a slower song began. He rested his hand on the small of her back, and she put her hand on his shoulders. Their gazes locked and he studied her blue eyes—they seemed especially bright on the dance floor.
She broke out into a wide grin. “This is the most fun I’ve ever had at a dance.”
He laughed. “But we just got here.”
“I know.” She gave a little shrug. “Maybe it’s because of you.”
Warmth radiated through him, and his heart soared. “Maybe. I know I couldn’t be happier.”
They spun around the dance floor for what had to be hours. Nate’s dress shoes from high school dug into his feet, but he didn’t care. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had so much fun, and having her in his embrace was the most natural thing in the world. He couldn’t deny how much he loved the way she kept looking at him. He would do anything to keep her looking at him like that.
If at any point he’d been trying to convince himself he wasn’t falling in love, there would be no denying it anymore. The fact was, he’d never felt anything like this before, ever. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and protect her from all harm, to be the one who would tell her whatever caused the sadness behind her eyes would be okay, that he would fix anything for her. And he would, too,
if only he knew what the cause was.
Sure, they’d only been getting to know each other for a few weeks, but it was long enough to know how he felt—that he would travel the world and move any mountain for her.
“You want to take a break?” she asked after a while.
“Okay. Do you want me to get you some punch? Wine? Snacks?”
“Appetizers would be great. I’ll go with you.” She walked with him to the massive spread. It took up a wall and a half, and they had everything from tiny sandwiches to sushi to things Nate didn’t recognize. He was pretty sure he saw caviar and escargot and was grateful when Madisyn didn’t offer him any.
“Where do you want to sit?” There weren’t any empty tables, but some of them had a free chair or two.
Madisyn glanced toward her father, who laughed with a group of men his age. “Do you mind going outside?”
“I could use some fresh air.” They took a side door that led to a cabana overlooking a massive flower garden. He led the way then brushed some leaves off the bench for her. They sat and ate, not saying much. Nate didn’t realize how hungry he was until he started eating. Luckily, he’d piled his plate pretty high and most of the food was good.
Once they were done, he took the empty plates and cups to the garbage. He held out his hand. “Ready to go back inside?”
She shook her head, the look of sadness returning. “It’s nice out here.”
“I like it.” He sat and put his arm around her. She nestled closer to him and leaned her head against his shoulder. He studied the colorful garden as they sat in silence. It had to cost a fortune to keep it as healthy as it was, not that he knew much about gardens.
Madisyn took a deep breath. “Do you have any regrets?”
The question took him by surprise, but he had no problem answering honestly. “Of course. Plenty of them.”
She played with the elastic on the wrist corsage for a moment before turning to look at him. Tears shone in her eyes.
A mix of emotions shot through him—he simultaneously wanted to protect her, yearned to hurt whoever had upset her, and cringed against the sympathy pains squeezing his chest.
“So do I.” Madisyn’s lower lip wavered. “Something happened in my freshman year of college that I’ve never told anyone about.”
“What is it?”
“Do you promise not to judge me? Not that I could blame you if you did.” She sighed and frowned.
Nate ran his fingertips along her jawline. “I’d be the last person to judge you, ever. Trust me. Not after some of the things I’ve done.”
Madisyn swallowed and a tear escaped.
He wiped it away. “You can tell me anything. I doubt it’s worse than anything I’ve done.”
“I killed my best friend.”
Nate stared at her in disbelief. He hadn’t been expecting her to say that.
Had he heard her right?
“You killed your best friend?”
Fifteen
The look of horror on Nate’s face was like knives stabbing Madisyn all over. He stared at her with wide eyes, his pupils dilated—probably with shock from learning what a monster she really was. It was what she deserved him to think, because it was true. It was what she deserved for everyone to think of her, if she was being honest.
She had to say something, and fast. “Well, technically, it wasn’t me that killed her.” But it may as well have been. She glanced down at her hands. “You can run away screaming now. I wouldn’t blame you.”
Nate cupped her chin. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Madisyn dared to meet his gaze. His eyes held nothing other than kindness. “You’re not? I just admitted to killing someone that I cared about.”
“You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried. What happened? I’m sure it’s not as bad as it sounds.”
Her stomach lurched. There was no going back now. She had to finish telling her story, even if Nate did end up hating her by the end. “Ella was more than just a college roommate. We were best friends. Both of us had overbearing dads, and we understood each other in ways nobody else did. But her dad was worse than mine—he used to hit them. She was so glad to be out of there but felt bad for her mom and little brother who were still stuck at home.” Madisyn took a deep breath.
Nate nodded for her to continue.
“We were both doing well in school, and then she met Brock. She started spending every free minute with him. I thought it was cute, at least until she came home with a bruise on her cheek and wouldn’t look at me. I knew right away something was wrong. She tried telling me she’d walked into a wall, but I didn’t buy it. Finally, she admitted Brock had hit her a few times. She said it wasn’t a big deal, that she’d deserved it.” Madisyn took a deep breath and tried to push down the now-enormous lump in her throat.
“What did you do?” Nate kept her chin cupped in his palm and wrapped his other arm protectively around her.
“I got mad at her and told her she needed to leave him! She said it wasn’t a big deal, and I told her she had to break the cycle. I begged her and had her think of her future children. Did she want them to have the same legacy?” More tears filled her eyes and she blinked, letting them run down her face. “Ella didn’t listen. Came back with another bruise. That time I told her I was going to go to the police. She freaked out and begged me not to. She said she’d break up with him and get help—anything to keep me from getting him in trouble.”
“What did you do?”
Madisyn buried her face against him and sobbed. “I should’ve gone to the cops then, but instead I waited for her to break it off with him. But she n-never came back home. Brock’s in jail, and she’s… she’s dead. I could’ve stopped it, but I didn’t.”
Nate rubbed her back. “It’s not your fault. You didn’t kill her.”
She sat back and looked at him through the tears. “I may as well have—I failed her. My plan was to go to the police if she came back with another bruise. I shouldn’t have waited. I’m as guilty as Brock.”
He shook his head. “No, you’re not. You weren’t the one who beat the life out of her. You were trying to be a good friend.”
Her hands shook. “But if I’d gone to the cops, they could’ve done something.”
“Maybe. But maybe not. What if Ella refused to press charges? What if she denied anything had happened?”
“Then at least I would’ve given her the opportunity to make that choice!”
Nate laced his fingers through hers. “She could’ve turned him in at any point, but she didn’t. Have you been blaming yourself for this all these years?”
“Yes. It’s my fault.”
“It’s not.” He drew her close to him and held her tightly.
For the first time in a long time, she felt safe. Protected. Cared for. She relaxed in his arms, relief flooding through her after finally telling someone about her role in Ella’s death. She closed her eyes and focused on Nate’s hand rubbing circles on her back.
“You know, everyone has things in their past that they’re not proud of.”
“That led to the death of someone they loved?” She sat back and stared at him.
“It’s not your fault. I really hope you can forgive yourself. You didn’t kill her.”
“But I may as well have.”
He took a deep breath. “Do you want to know what I’ve done?”
“What did you do?”
Nate’s expression tensed. “I fled town and got involved with some pretty serious criminal activity.”
She stared at him, at a loss for words. “Criminal activity?”
He nodded. “It didn’t take me long to burn through what little money I had, and soon I started stealing just so I could eat. First, I stole food, then I stole things to sell. Then I met up with this guy named Vinny who works for some big-time felons. I don’t know any of their real names, but he offered me a job transporting packages for those people. I probably moved a thousand felony’s worth of drugs and weapons. I�
��ll never know what was in those boxes. Basically, I just didn’t let myself think about it, but I was guilty regardless. If I’d been caught with any of it, I’d have been the one to go to prison. For life, most likely.”
Madisyn stared into his eyes as she let his words sink in. It was no wonder they’d had an instant connection. They were both carrying around a world of guilt.
He squeezed her hand. “But I’ve chosen to leave that life behind. You can make the same decision. Leave your guilt behind. Do you think Ella would want that?”
She’d never thought about that—what Ella would’ve wanted her to do. But she knew the answer. Her best friend wouldn’t have wanted Madisyn to spend her life wracked with guilt. But how could she let go? It wasn’t like she could go back in time and change what she’d done. At least Nate had been able to stop what he’d been doing.
Sixteen
“Bye!” Nate waved as he left the Snake Pit karaoke bar. It had been a long, tiring night, but a sense of pride ran through him for earning an honest wage. It was nowhere near what he’d earned working for Vinny, but it didn’t matter—the only thing that mattered was being back home near Madisyn.
Running into her at the pier a month earlier had been the best thing that had ever happened to him, and they’d grown even closer in the last week since the dance. After opening up about their pasts, they’d had deep talks every day, whether on the phone or in person. They’d even gone to church on Sunday, sitting in between his parents and her mom. Madisyn had squeezed his hand the entire time as the pastor spoke about how nobody was exempt from redemption.
Nate brought his thoughts back to the present and glanced up at the night sky. He’d missed being able to see so many stars when he’d lived in the bigger cities. How many times had he wished under these very stars growing up? He found the brightest one and focused on it. I wish for Madisyn to find the peace she needs.
Bayside Opposites Page 6
