by Alexa Land
The living room was actually a corner of the warehouse that they’d decorated with a futon couch, a few secondhand upholstered chairs, a big area rug and a scuffed coffee table. The couple pulled on sweatshirts over their t-shirts as we sat down. There was no way to heat this huge space, and they didn’t have dancing to keep them warm now.
“So, how long have you guys known each other?” Skye asked, settling in right beside Dare on the futon and wrapping his arms around his fiancé’s big bicep.
“Since last night,” I told him. “The cops rolled up on me when I was working in the Tenderloin, so Chance posed as my newlywed husband and we were able to escape with only minimal harassment. Then I offered to buy him a drink and he made me go to Rounders.”
“My God why?” Dare asked.
I was curious to see if Chance would out himself as a prostitute, but all he said was, “Because it’s a great pick-up joint. Which reminds me, Christian, what happened with you and that hot guy in the blue shirt?”
“Oh. Um, we went back to his place,” I said, shifting a bit in my chair.
“I knew he was into you. Did I not tell you?” Chance said happily.
“You actually know him, Skye,” I said. “His name’s Shea. He said he remembered you from his cousin’s wedding and from when you and Nana got arrested.”
Skye smiled at me. “Shea Nolan’s a total sweetheart. I saw him checking you out that day at the police station. You didn’t even notice.”
“I was a little preoccupied,” I told him. “My best friend had just been arrested and was plastered all over the news.”
“That’s why you look familiar,” Chance exclaimed. “You were the blue-haired go-go boy in the limo who was dancing with the giant cock! I saw the picture in the paper of you and that old lady busting up an anti-gay rally!”
“I wasn’t dancing with the giant cock,” Skye clarified with a grin. “I was merely cock-adjacent.”
“Either way, that was epic.” Chance smiled delightedly. “It totally figures that Zane would have such interesting and awesome friends.”
“Oh,” Skye said. “You know about Zane?”
“I’m a huge fan of his work,” Chance said. “For the last couple years, I’ve been trying to find and photograph all of his murals, before they’re painted over or otherwise destroyed.”
“And you said no one ever notices your work.” Skye was beaming at me.
“They don’t. Just you and Chance. You because you know me and Chance because he’s kind of nuts.” I grinned at my new friend affectionately.
“You have no idea how many people are aware of your paintings,” Chance said. “I’m sure you have quite the cult following. You’re too good not to.”
“You should help him, Z,” Skye said. “Take him around the city and show him your hiding places. I’d love to see the photos, by the way. I have some on my phone, but they’re not all that clear.”
“I have some on my phone too, but they’re not as good as the ones I take with my DSLR camera.” Chance pulled out his phone and pulled up the pictures, then handed it to Skye.
“Wow, these photos are incredible,” Dare said as he and Skye flipped through the pictures. “Do you do other types of photography, too? We’ve been meaning to find someone to take our engagement photos.”
“Oh! Um, yeah. I can do whatever you need,” Chance said.
I watched him as he and my friends chatted about photography. He seemed so earnest and excited. I wondered what his story was, and really wanted to ask the question he’d forbidden me from asking. What the hell was a smart guy like that doing selling his body? I knew better than to bring it up, though.
We’d been hanging out for just a few minutes when someone threw open the door to the warehouse. A familiar voice yelled, “You decent, boys? I’m coming in, so if you’re in the middle of some sexy gay homosexual lovemaking, you better cover up!”
Nana Dombruso came bustling around the partition. She was a tiny little fireball of about eighty with a huge handbag over her arm. I chuckled and asked Skye, “Why does she expect you to be naked?”
He colored slightly and told me, “Because she actually busted in on Dare and me in the middle of a sixty-nine last weekend. We dove for cover, but I’m pretty sure she still saw way too much.”
“You might want to learn to lock the front door,” I said.
“You’re not wrong.”
Nana had reached us by now. She was wearing a purple velour track suit and a rhinestone-studded matching baseball cap. “So, big deal,” she exclaimed. “I raised three sons and four grandsons. I know what a weenie dongle looks like.” She turned to me and said, “Christian! Where have you been keeping yourself? And who’s your new friend? Are you two an item?” She squinted at Chance and told him, “I assume you’re a gay homosexual, because now I just assume everyone is until they tell me differently.”
“Why yes, I am a gay homosexual,” he said with a smile.
She dug a pair of big round glasses out of her purse and stuck them on her face. “Oh my, you’re a cute one! What’s your name?”
“Chance Matthews, ma’am.”
“What do you do, Chance? And more importantly, are you doing Christian? I don’t like it when my boys are single. Seems like such a waste!”
Skye answered for him. “He and Christian are just friends, Nana. He’s a photographer, we’re going to have him take our engagement pictures. Weren’t you saying something about needing a photographer the other day?”
She clapped her hands together and exclaimed, “A photographer, perfect! Now I can cross that off my to-do list. Listen, you boys are on winter break from Sutherlin beginning on the thirteenth, aren’t you?” Skye nodded and she said, “If you have anything planned for the week before Christmas, cancel it! You’re going to be busy.”
She squeezed in next to Dare on the futon, then fished around in her handbag until she found a stack of thick, white envelopes and some glossy brochures. She flipped through the envelopes, finally handing Skye one addressed to him and Dare, then one to me that said ‘Christian George and Guest (hopefully a hot boyfriend)’. Inside was an elegant wedding invitation. As she passed out the brochures she said, “We’re taking a Dotsy Cruise around the Hawaiian Islands!”
“We who?” Dare asked.
“All of us, including you boys!”
“But...why?” Skye asked as I looked at the person in a grinning Dalmatian costume on the cover of the brochure.
“Because I’m throwing a surprise wedding for my grandson Vincent and your friend Trevor! I’m also hosting a wedding for my boys Hunter and Brian, only they know about it because they’re not pig-headed like my grandson. Him I need to ambush.”
“Oh wow!” Skye exclaimed.
“All that celebrating in one fun-filled week at sea, can’t you just picture it? It’s gonna be a real hum-dinger!” She looked immensely pleased with herself.
“That’s amazing, Nana,” Dare said. “Can we help with any of the preparations?”
“No thanks sweetie, I got it all under control. Now, I wanted to talk to you two so you don’t feel left out,” Nana told the couple. “I would throw a wedding for you at the same time, of course, but you two already started talking about a lovely ceremony next June, so I’m not gonna interfere with that. These other boys though, bah! They’d all just run off to the Justice of the Peace if I let them!”
“We understand, Nana. Are you sure this a good idea, though? Trevor and Vincent just wanted a small ceremony,” Skye said. “And what about all the grooms’ friends and families?”
“My grandson’s just shy, his sweetie is, too. But they’re gonna love this, just you wait and see. I’m going to make it so magical for them that they can’t help but love it! As far as their friends and family members, they’re all invited, of course! I was in luck because Dotsy just added one extra voyage for the holidays, so I could book a great, big block of rooms for all of us. That’s why it’s happening on such short notice, I had
to jump on this the moment that cruise was added. Otherwise, good luck getting that many rooms together! Oh, and I’m paying for everyone’s plane tickets to Honolulu too, of course. That’s where we sail from, a week from tomorrow.”
“Wow Nana,” I said, “that’s incredibly generous.”
She waved her hand dismissively. “What’s the point in having money if you can’t enjoy it? And I plan to enjoy the hell out of this cruise, lemme tell you! Isn’t this going to be exciting?” Her dark eyes sparkled with delight.
Skye smiled at her and said, “It’ll be wonderful. Thank you, Nana.”
I just had to ask. “Out of curiosity, why did you decide to go with Dotsy?” The cruises were geared specifically to families with young kids.
“Well, because Trevor and Vincent have Joshie now. There’ll be plenty of other kids in the wedding party, too. Besides, who doesn’t love Dotsy Dog? All my boys grew up on the cartoons!” Nana leapt to her feet and said, “I got a million things to do, I better hustle on out of here! Don’t worry about renting tuxes, boys, we’re going cruise ship casual here. Chance, you’re hired as the official wedding photographer. That right there is a load off my mind, lemme tell you! I didn’t know where I’d find someone for a whole week.” She paused to consider that, then asked, “You are available that week, aren’t you?”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said. “But you don’t even know if I’m any good.”
“If a great artist like Skye is hiring you to do photos of him and his sweetie, you’re good.” She rushed toward the door as she called, “I gotta go bikini shopping next. Hawaii, here I come! I’ll call you, Christian, to make arrangements and get Chance’s photographer fees paid. See you soon, boys!”
We just sat there for a few moments in dazed silence after she left. Finally I said, “So, that just happened. Are we really going on a cruise with a dog for a captain?”
Skye grinned at that. “Yup.” He turned to Dare and said, “We need to take a look at our schedule. There are a few things we’ll need to move around.”
“Damn,” I muttered. “I really like Trevor and want to attend his wedding, but a week at sea on a kiddie cruise? I really might lose my mind. Think anyone would notice if I gave it a skip?”
“You’re doing this!” Skye exclaimed. “Trevor’s going to want you there, and I do, too. Plus, don’t you think Chance might need some moral support? The poor guy was just hit by Hurricane Nana for the first time.”
“You better really be a photographer,” I told him.
Chance looked at me. “I am. Well, kind of.”
*****
When we drove back into the city later that afternoon, Chance murmured, “This has been the weirdest, most unexpected day. I think I should bow out of that job, though. It sounds like so much fun, but I’ve never done anything as important as a wedding and I don’t know if I’m good enough.”
“Why don’t you show me your photos? Maybe you’re underestimating yourself. I’d like you to give it a shot, because frankly, I’d love some company. When you’re not taking pictures, you can be my drinking buddy.”
“Your best friend’s going to be there, you don’t need me.”
“Yeah, along with his fiancé. The last thing I want is to be their third wheel while they’re enjoying that cruise.”
He hesitated before saying, “None of them know I’m a prostitute. As soon as they find out, they won’t want me along.”
“Nobody will care. Do you know how Nana Dombruso’s family made all that money?”
“How?”
“They were old-school mafia for generations.”
Chance’s eyes went wide. “You’re shitting me.”
“I think they’ve pretty much gone legit by now. But still, they won’t even blink when they find out you’re in a less than legal line of work.”
“People consider it immoral too, though. Won’t Mrs. Dombruso care about that?”
“Nana’s not the judgmental sort.”
Chance studied his slender hands, which were folded in his lap. Finally he said, “Would you let me bunk with you?”
“Of course.”
“Aren’t you concerned that I’m going to steal your money and credit cards?”
“Nope.”
“Aren’t you worried about me turning tricks on the cruise and landing the entire wedding party in hot water?”
“Are you planning to turn tricks during the cruise?”
“No.”
“So, we’re fine then.”
He was quiet for a while before saying softly, “Thank you for trusting me. Most people don’t.”
I found a parking space in his neighborhood and accompanied him to his little studio apartment. It was in the Lower Haight, above an import store. The place couldn’t have been more than two hundred square feet, but it was bright, clean and inviting.
One wall was covered floor to ceiling in photographs. I recognized little details from my murals in several shots. “Did you take all of these?” I asked, and he nodded. “And you think you’re not good enough to be a wedding photographer? Dude, you’re actually way too good for that.” Chance had an incredible eye. He found beauty in things most people would overlook, like a tiny blue violet growing through a crack in the sidewalk and a little girl’s dirt-streaked hand clutching a worn out doll.
“You really think they’re okay?”
“No, Chance, they’re not okay. They’re fucking brilliant! Do you not know this?”
He shrugged and said, “I like them, but I was always worried about showing them to other people.”
“Why?”
“Well, what if they hated them? I’m self-taught, so a real photographer would probably see so many flaws. This is the only thing I’m any good at, or that I hoped I was good at. I just...I was scared that someone would come along and tear down my dream.”
That reminded me of Shea and the teacher that had dashed his dreams of becoming a comic book artist. I felt a pang in my chest at the thought of that sweet, gorgeous guy, who’d given me his virginity for some reason. Had that really just been this morning? I missed him more than I cared to admit.
“Hey.” Chance touched my arm lightly. “You okay?”
“Fine. Why?”
“You went away for a minute there.”
“I was remembering the guy from last night. Shea.” I grinned a little when I said his name.
“Oh man. That was more than a one-night stand, wasn’t it?”
“No.”
“Bullshit. Go sit down, I’m going get us a couple beers and then I want to hear about this guy.”
I did as I was told. The only place to sit was on a neatly made narrow daybed. I sat down at one end and when Chance limped over to me and handed me a beer from his little dorm fridge, I said, “Put your leg up, you should have been resting it today.”
“The bed’s too small. I’d have to put my foot on your lap.”
“So, go ahead.”
He considered that for a moment, then tugged off his boots and sat at the other end of the little bed, leaning against the armrest. He winced when he raised his leg and I asked, “Should you maybe be thinking about a hospital? What if that guy did some real damage to you?”
“I can’t afford a hospital. Besides, nothing’s broken. It’d hurt a lot more if it was.” He exhaled slowly as his foot came to rest on my thigh.
We opened our beers and I raised mine and said, “Cheers,” before taking a long drink.
“So, tell me. What went on last night that would inspire a look of such incredible wistfulness?” Chance grinned at me as he said that.
“You don’t really want to hear this.”
“You’re wrong. I want to know what’s going on with you two.”
“Why?”
“Because,” he said with a sweet smile, “all my life, I wanted a guy to look at me the way that guy looked at you.”
“What are you talking about? There were tons of guys checking you out last night. Every single on
e of them wanted to take you home.”
“Exactly. Even without knowing I was a prostitute, they all looked at me like I was a piece of meat. I was nothing to any of them, just a means of getting laid. That’s not how that guy looked at you.”
“How did he look at me?”
“Like you were a priceless work of art in a museum.”
“What?”
“That’s the only way I can describe it. He looked at you with awe and reverence, like you were the most amazing thing he’d ever seen.”
“You’re reading an awful lot into a look.”
“I’m not. I know people, Christian. Goes with the job. If I wasn’t able to read people accurately, I could end up going home with a complete sociopath.”
“Kind of like the guy last night.”
“He wasn’t a sociopath, he just didn’t know what the hell he was doing.”
“You really need to find a different job, Chance.”
That earned me an eye roll. “Thank you for that, Captain Obvious.”
“I’m just saying.”
“I know.”
I sighed and said, “I think you’re right, though. Last night wasn’t just about sex. But it was supposed to be! I told him right up front that I didn’t have any more to offer him. We both knew the score going in so I shouldn’t feel bad for the way I ended it this morning.”
“Would breaking your own rule and seeing him again be the worst thing in the world?”
“For him it could be. I’m going away in six short months, just as soon as I see my senior year through. It would be incredibly unfair to get involved with him, knowing for a fact that anything we started had an absolute expiration date.” I took off my ski jacket as I said that and draped it over the back of the daybed, then pushed up my shirt sleeves.
“Six months is actually a long time. Think of all the fun you could have!”
“And think of all the heartache when it ended.” I pushed my hair back from my forehead and said, “Is it hot in here, or did I suddenly develop a raging case of dengue fever?”
“It’s hot. I don’t have control over the thermostat, the people in the unit next door do since this used to all be one big apartment. Apparently they’re reptiles because they always keep the heat at tropical levels, but I can crack a window if you want.”
