by Jasmine Walt
Varuna sighed, and I saw a flash of the guy I’d met outside Brahma Corp. “I may be a part of the multi-verse, but I do not serve it. Do not test my power, little naga.”
“Or what?” Harish fisted his hands. “You can’t invade our domain and exert your authority over us. This is Nagalok, not Swarga.”
Varuna inclined his head. “Of course. I apologize for my destructive entrance. These are trial proceedings, I see.”
“Yes, and the sentence has been passed.”
Varuna quirked a brow.
“She is to be executed today,” Vasuki said.
Varuna looked my way, his lips pursed. “And there is nothing I may do or say to change your verdict?”
“Unequivocally not.” Harish crossed his arms across his chest.
Varuna shrugged. “A great shame. Creating her line took immense power, as you’re probably aware, and I had high hopes for our reality. Nothing will change your mind?” He raised a brow in Harish’s direction.
Harish pressed his lips together.
“Well, in that case, maybe you should take her to her cell and prepare the execution block.” He strode over to Harish and slung an arm around his shoulder. “And maybe you’d be kind enough to offer your favorite god a little refreshment?”
Harish blinked up at the god. “Yes, yes, of course, Lord Varuna.”
Garuda looked from me to Vasuki to Varuna and then back to me.
“I assume I’ll be permitted to take the body home?” Varuna began leading him from the room.
“Of course,” Harish said, suddenly completely enraptured by the god.
Vasuki met my eye. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. And then my guards were leading me from the room. This time, there was no reprieve.
I was going to die, and not even the gods could save me.
28
Two hours of life left. Two hours to be spent in the confines of a cell similar to the one Garuda had been held in. They were probably setting up the execution block right now—death by beheading. I rubbed my throat.
My body was hot. Flooded with adrenaline, wanting to run, wanting to fight, but there was no way out of this. No conceivable way to escape. The horror of what was about to happen sucked the strength from my limbs, bringing me to my knees. I didn’t want to cry. I was an assassin. A killer. How many times had I inflicted this fate on others? How many times had I played executioner? The only blessing had been that they’d never seen it coming. Their deaths had been sudden and unexpected. Why couldn’t I have the same? Knowing it was coming was worse. I didn’t want to be afraid, but my body had other ideas, heaving in panic and bringing unwanted tears to my eyes.
The sound of the key scraping against the lock filled the cell. I scrambled to my feet and wiped my wet cheeks. No way would I let them see me broken, but it was Vasuki who entered, leading a figure whose face was hidden by a deep hood. He led the female to the wooden bed and made her sit.
“Who is that?”
Vasuki carefully pushed back the hood and revealed her face.
My face.
The figure was my alternate, except her amber eyes were glazed and vacant. Her hair was slightly shorter, too, and she was more wiry than me. Vasuki gently peeled the cloak off her shoulders and passed it to me. He also handed me a bundle of clothes. “Strip off and put those clothes on. Then dress your alternate in your items.”
“What?”
“Malina, if you want to live, please do as I say.”
He was going to sub her for me. Send her to the chopping block in my place. Relief warred with disgust. “What’s wrong with her?”
“An emotional trauma. I can’t go into details, but just know the Malina who was in that body has long gone. It’s just a walking shell now.”
Did that make it any better? I didn’t want to think too hard on it, or weigh up the implications. By allowing this to happen, I was committing murder . . . again. But that darn survival instinct had a grip on my throat, shaking me and forcing me to acknowledge the fact that if it came down to her or me, it would always be me.
“Fine, turn around so I can change.”
Vasuki obliged, and I stripped off my outfit and quickly dressed in the loose-fitting trousers, tunic, and thick cloak he’d given me. The hood cast my face in shadow. Dressing my alternate was another matter altogether. She was like a living doll, warm but unresponsive. Her skin was a map of cruel scars—creamy protrusions on her otherwise dark skin. Who or what had done this to her? A lump formed in my throat. I finished dressing her and stood back to examine my efforts. She looked good. She looked like me. What kind of life had she lived? What monsters had she fought? I ached to know. Yet, I yearned to live more.
“Won’t they wonder why she’s unresponsive?”
“They’ll assume that the fear of death has driven you deep into your own mind. Harish doesn’t even know of this Malina’s existence. I’ve been keeping her in my private wing. Only Bhima, my trusted confidant, is aware she exists. This was his idea and a formidable one. He isn’t willing to disregard the seer’s words even if Harish is. Varuna is entertaining Harish with wicked tales of his otherworld exploits. He will remain for the execution to allay suspicion.” Vasuki opened the door and ushered me out. “Come, we must move fast. The guards have gone for their meal, but they will return soon.”
I brushed back my alternate’s hair. “I’m sorry . . . so sorry.” With a final lingering look, I followed Vasuki out of the cell.
The stables were shrouded in gloom. Out of the shadows stepped the hulking figure of Garuda. He strode forward and gathered me into his arms, squeezing and inhaling me as if my scent was going out of fashion. He released me quickly before my instincts went into overdrive and I tried to drop-kick him or something. But I wasn’t unaffected. My cheeks were warm, and my body tingled from the contact. I couldn’t stop staring at him.
“Get in, quick.” Vasuki ushered us into the wicker carriage he had enchanted earlier. “The vehicle will transport you to the same gateway you used to enter our world. It’s been temporarily closed due to the lack of guardian, but this will allow you to exit.” He slipped a signet ring off his finger and handed it to me. “There is a grove by the arch. Press the ring to it, and the exit will activate.”
“You sure it won’t accidentally deposit me in another reality?”
He smiled. “The multi-verse knows where you belong.”
The ring was massive. I handed it to Garuda, who slipped it onto his pinky before helping me into the carriage and climbing in after me.
Vasuki locked eyes with me. “Go. Live. And don’t let her sacrifice be in vain.” He slammed the door, and the carriage began to move.
We were going home.
29
Everything in our world seemed duller, grayer somehow. Sure, it was night, but still, our reality paled in comparison to the richness of Nagalok.
Garuda led us out from under the bridge and up the stone steps into the night. The car was waiting where we’d left it, but a bunch of tickets were shoved under the windshield wiper. Garuda snatched them up and sighed.
“How long have we been gone?”
He crumpled the tickets. “Almost a month.”
A month! “How is that even possible?”
“Nagalok exists outside of time. I guess the multi-verse placed us back where we belong, but not necessarily at the correct time. Just be thankful we didn’t come back in the past.” He unlocked the car, and I climbed into its leather embrace.
He paused, his hand on the ignition. “Do you want to talk about what happened before we head back?”
“No.”
I’d kept silent all the way here, pressing in the screams that rose in my chest every time I thought about what I’d done. I’d left my alternate to die for me. To have her head chopped off. What if Vasuki was wrong? What if she was still in there, trapped and unable to speak out? Yeah, it was all very well thinking about it once I was on the way home. I hadn’t raised these objections at the
time, though, had I? I was a fucking coward. And if I shared this with Garuda, he’d just say I’d done the right thing. I’d survived. He’d justify my actions, but I didn’t want to feel vindicated. I wanted to feel like shit. I needed to punish myself for her death, at least for a while. So the trip back had been my wallow time. But it had to end now because I had a job to do.
Garuda started the engine, and I settled into the seat and closed my eyes. I was safe, I was alive, and I didn’t want to think about what I’d had to do to achieve that, even though the fresh mark on my arm would be a constant reminder.
“Malina, we’re here.” Garuda’s breath was warm on my cheek.
For a moment, I forgot where we were, where we’d been, and what I’d done, and then it came flooding back. Slamming into my solar plexus and stealing my oxygen. Gasping, I sat up and undid my belt.
“Hey, it’s all right. You’re all right.”
I was home. I was fine. “Thanks.”
He glanced out his window, up at the house. “You want me to come in with you?”
Yes was on the tip of my tongue, but I bit it back. We needed some distance, and I had things I needed to set straight. “No. I . . . I’ll call you.”
His regard was a physical caress, but I couldn’t return it. Not until I’d made things right with Ajitah. I owed them both that much. I couldn’t have Garuda. That was a given. But I couldn’t use Ajitah as a substitute either. I climbed out of the car and walked up the steps to the house. The moments I’d shared with Garuda were branded in my mind. They shone too bright, eclipsing even the most intimate encounters of my life. Those moments told me where my heart lay. The engine revved behind me, and I turned to watch my heart drive away.
I raised my hand to knock, but the door flew open before I made contact. Drake stood on the threshold. His eyes widened in shock. He pulled me into the house and enveloped me in a huge hug.
“Thank God you’re okay. Varuna went after you weeks ago, and then neither of you came back.”
I pulled away. “You guys sent Varuna after me?”
Drake shut the door. “Well, he kind of offered. He used to be the naga’s favorite god, and he said he could get in and stuff. I mean, after Indra showed up to warn us that the penalty for a naga killing another naga was death, Eamon went into panic mode. Apparently, Indra was chatting to Varuna about you and the kills and stuff, and Varuna, who knows naga law, told him about it. Indra came barreling down here to check on you and make sure you hadn’t gone running off to Nagalok. But you had, so Varuna had to go after you. To save you. Did he save you? Of course he did because you’re here.”
“Yeah, I’m here.” But a version of me was dead.
“And bloody Garuda’s been nowhere to be found.”
“Garuda was with me.”
Drake’s mouth fell open, and he quickly snapped it closed. “Is he crazy? What happened? You have to tell me everything.”
“I will, I just . . . Where’s my dad?”
Drake stared at me, unblinking.
“What?”
“You called him Dad.”
“I did . . . again.” It felt right and natural now. “Is he home?”
Drake walked toward the stairs. “Yeah, he’s here. He’s been getting worse, Malina, and he finally told us why. I was just out to . . . to get some more pain relief when you turned up. It’s good you came back now, before . . .”
“Before what?”
“He’s fading fast, Malina.”
Drake took a step to climb the stairs. Heart pounding in frightened anticipation, I followed. “We believe that you’re somehow siphoning the energy from the seal. That it’s somehow linked to you both when it should only be linked to Eamon. Your hybrid nature may be the cause. Because you’re immortal, it’s not affecting you like it is Eamon.”
No . . . There was something else, something teasing at the back of my mind—a memory desperate to resurface. But then we were standing outside Eamon’s bedroom door, and I couldn’t think anymore. I had to see him.
“He doesn’t look great, so be prepared.”
An icy fist closed over my heart. I opened the door and stepped into the room that smelled of death and decay. There was no denying the truth . . . my father was dying. My eyes stung, and I sniffed back the tears. I had to be strong for him. I needed to be the woman he would have raised.
Eamon lifted his head off his pillows. “Malina?”
I walked over to the bed and sat by his side. How could he have shrunk so much in such a short space of time? His body barely made a lump under the covers, as if a child lay there in place of a grown man. His hair, usually thick and lustrous, was thinning and gray. He’d aged almost a decade since I’d last seen him.
“I remembered, Dad. I remember us.”
His eyes lit up. “You did? You do?” A sob caught in his throat, and he held out his arms for me.
Was it okay to cry now? Was it permissible to let it out and find joy in such a moment of loss? The tears were hot and plenty, and there was no shame in them. I held his frail body and allowed him to stroke my hair while I wept.
Eyes wet and swollen, I pulled back to look down at his face. “This is my fault. My hybrid nature is killing you.”
He smiled wearily, his chest rattling on an exhale. “My time would have come eventually, but even if it hadn’t, I’m your father, and I would die a hundred deaths for you. I’m just happy you’re back in time for me to say goodbye and tell you the things you need to know.”
I clasped his hand in mine. “Tell me.”
“Are we alone?”
“Yes. Drake thought we could do with some privacy.”
“Good. Listen. You must break things off with Ajitah.”
This again? He didn’t need to worry. I was going to do that anyway. “Dad—”
“No. It’s not why you think. Ajitah isn’t who you think he is. He’s not human. Well, his body is, but his essence . . . Ajitah is a god.”
“What?”
“Yama. Ajitah is Yama.”
A scratching at the back of my skull. “I don’t understand. How can he be Yama? I thought Yama was trapped in the underworld.”
“No. The gods pulled him out. He was gravely injured. Almost mad with grief and anger at the carnage caused by the gates opening against his will. He blamed himself. He wanted to go back, find the cause, and stop it. He kept saying there was a cause, but the gods knew it was futile. Obviously, we now know he was right. The Daughter of Chaos was the cause, but at the time they believed the fault lay with Yama, that he’d messed up somehow. They insisted on sealing the gates, and Yama fought them. He was strong, but no match for them, and they put him to sleep. Well, his memories at least. They locked him in a mortal body and named him Ajitah. But the strength of a god’s essence, whether in a mortal body designed to carry it or not, is awesome. Ajitah has always been a cut above the rest. His moral compass, his sense of right and wrong—all traits that made him the perfect god to rule the underworld and judge the souls of the dead—shine through even now.”
Those traits had attracted me to him, or had my hellhound nature been attracted to the lord of death? “I don’t understand. How long has he roamed the earth as a man, then? It makes no sense. Surely he would realize something was wrong once he’d been alive for a century and not aged?”
Dad smiled dryly. “The gods wipe his memory every few decades and place him somewhere new. They take it in turns to employ him, to keep him close and guarded. This time around, it was my turn.”
“So you had me recruit him, but didn’t want me dating him because he’s a god?”
“Pfft, you can date a god if you like. It’s not that. It’s just that . . . Ajitah is married.”
My heart stalled. Even though I’d intended to break up with him, it still cut to find out he was taken, that he could never have been mine even if I wanted.
Dad squeezed my hand. “When the time comes for him to be awoken, he will remember his past and his wives. You woul
d have been hurt. I was trying to protect you.”
“Wives?”
“Yes, Yama has three wives. They’re sisters.”
The words echoed in my head, and the niggling memory exploded to the surface of my mind. “Oh, God! I met them. I mean, I dreamt about them. They’re hiding in the seal. They wanted me to bring Yama to them.”
“What?” Dad struggled to sit up but slumped back down. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I forgot each time. I forgot the interactions. But when you mentioned the wives, the memories just came to the surface. They’re the ones who helped me in the Underground. They channeled the power from the seal and . . .” The seal. The power. They’d redirected it. They’d channeled it into me in order to communicate with me. What if that redirection was causing Dad’s sickness? What if their manipulation of the seal’s power was making him sick?
Dad shook his head. “No. I can guess what you’re thinking. Even though the theory is sound, it doesn’t make sense.”
“But why? Why doesn’t it make sense?”
“I started to get sick long before I found you, Malina. Long before you went through the change. The seal wouldn’t have sensed you until the change, so there is no way they could have diverted energy to you before then. My sickness was inevitable when I sired you.”
“But the diverting made it worse . . .”
“It doesn’t matter now. All that matters is you’re here with me. That we’re together again.”
No, I didn’t want this. I didn’t want him to go. Something flickered in the corner of my vision.
“Promise me you’ll take care of Yama. That you’ll keep him by your side until the time comes for him to move on. He’s your responsibility.”
“Why are you saying these things now? We have plenty of time.”
He reached up to caress my cheek. “No, honey. We don’t.”
That movement appeared in the corner of my vision again. I turned my head to capture it and saw him, the yamduth, standing in the shadows, silent and waiting.
